why do elephants eat peanuts? so they can save the wrappers for valuable prizes

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What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I like to rape cats.

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What did the fish say when it hit the wall? "Dam."

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What did Tom get for Christmas? Gloves, but Tom had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? NOT TOM

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What did George Washington say before he crossed the Delaware? "Get in the boat."

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ati jokes are not to be funny. what about u

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm using my hand but thinking of you.

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Here is a nursery rhyme: Jane is a scruff, she has a head full of nits. She also had pain in her great big... Now don't get excited. Don't be mislead. Because all that Jane had was a pain in her head!

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What do eagles and ground hogs have in common? They both live underground, except for the eagle.

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why couldn't the boy use the computer He could i meant could

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why did the little girl eat grapes? because she felt like it.

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Q: What is your favorite color? M: Blue

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A lady goes into the store to buy potatoes. Then she eats them.

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What do you call a city that never sleeps? Cities cannot sleep; they merely represent a societal body of people living in a confined community. A city may have a prosperous night-life, however, cannot functionally "fall asleep" in the convential sense of the term.

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What's the difference between a duck? One of its feet are both the same.

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Why did the cancerous elephant cross the road? it said WALK.

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What is the same about a plum and an elephant? They're both grey except the plum

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It's April Fool's Day and a little boy runs up to his mom. "Daddy hung himself! He's in the attic!" The mom runs up to the attic, but the dad's not there. The boy looks at his mom and says, "April fools! He's in the basement!"

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What happens when you cross a Mexican and a Chinese man? A multiracial man.

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Do you know how I know you're gay? 'Cuz your penis tastes like shit.

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Why did the man remain calm when the judge passed the death sentence? Because he was in another country and had no connection with the case.

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What is this, a center for ants? No, this is a model of the building proportionally smaller than the one we will be building.

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a blind guy walks past a fish market and exlaims.. "it smells like a fish market"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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