Q: What did the fish say when it swam into a concrete wall? A: Fish don't have vocal cords that allow them to speak in a way discernable by humans, and if they did, it would just sound garbled and bubbly due to their being underwater.

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Why do black people like fried chicken? There's cocaine inside.

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Q) What is the difference between an elephant and a toaster? A) Do you seriously not know the difference between an elephant... and a toaster?

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there once was a man, he was old, and he had one wish...do you wanna know that wish? Well i don't know it because he died two seconds ago from a heart attack. Oh Well...

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What did the horse say to the other horse? Neigh

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Why was the orange so serious? He was trying to concentrate.

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What did the tree say to the kite? She got hit by a fridge.

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Did you hear about the dyslexic eye chart maker? His disability caused to him to have a difficult time at work and his production suffered because of this.

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Why did the stoner cross the road? He didn't. He was stoned

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Why did lil' Jimmy fall off his bike? The weight ratio between the left and right sections of his body became uneven due to some sort of change in the traction of the tires to the bumps on the road/ path.

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Dear Board of education, so are we.

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.Ttwo guys walked into a bar. The third one ducked.

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A bus full of retarded kids got broken on his way. One kid suggested to the bus driver that the problem could be with the brakes, as that kid's father was a mechanic.

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What did the black guy say to the white guy? What did the black guy say o the white guy

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What is green and drives around in the desert and is not a tank? secretly a tank

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Two computers walk into a bar I forget the rest

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Your mama is so ugly, when she looks in the mirror it displays her reflection like all mirrors do

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What's the difference between a duck? both of it's legs are the same.

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if quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? testicle

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what happened to the man who got hit by a truck driven by Obama? he died.

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? About 144 licks but everyone gets different answers because we all lick lollipops differently.

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What do you call a Muslim flying an airplane? A pilot, what did you think it was? F**king Racist dumbass

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Why didn't the little asian kid go to his friends party? Because he wasnt invited.

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what do call a dead dog in between two planks of wood? big sandwhich.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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