ask me if im a tree! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Im gay What about you

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

"Nice pair of crocs" said nobody

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What would George Washington say if he were alive? "Help! im stuck in a coffin!"

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's brown and sticky? A Mexicans underwear.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did Petunia say to the other Petunia Hi there Petunia

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's long, hard, and full of seamen... A Submarine

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How did the Jew his German neighbor? Every morning the Jew says hello and the German replys hello

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did Osama Bin Laden say to Hitler? Nothing, because they clearly never made contact with each other, owing to the fact that Osama was born approximately 13 years after Hitler had committed suicide

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the girl drown? Well, the girl probably did drown because she was within the ages of 3-5 years old, and she probably had a physical incapapbilty and she could not swim so her parents didn't save her.

thumb_up thumb_down -84

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are Red, Violets are blue, most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How many anti jokes can you make from one joke? 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12. 13. 14. 15. 16. 17. 18. 19. 20. 21. 22. 23. 24. 25. 26. 27. 28. 29. 30. 31. 32. 33. 34. 35. 36. 37. 38. 39. 40. 41. 42. 43. 44. 45. 46. 47. 48. 49. 50. And so on.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call a cow who can't produce milk? Utter failure.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call a black guy with a fan? An African American male Homo Sapien who is most likely hot and sweaty and is probably trying to create cold air and then reduce how hot they are likely reducing the sweat glands natural instict to create ameliorate of sweat and then make him feel better.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What is the only non-racist animal? The mexican panda. Why? It's black, white, hispanic, and asian.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

knock knock whos there open open who the door

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because on the other side of the road people don't question his motives

thumb_up thumb_down -20

whats the same about a donkey and a horse? They are from the same animal classification group.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the mother of the boy with cancer say on his birthday? - Happy Birthday, too bad you still have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A black man, an asian man, and a gay man walk into a bar. What do they do? They mourn the loss of their dead friend.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

I ponder

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the dog cross the road? Because the pizza man saw how hungry he was and left a pizza for the dog. So when the dog saw the pizza he went to go get the pizza, because he was hungry. In hindsight the moral of the story is: if you ever see a hungry dog on the other side of the road, become a pizza man (if you aren't already) and give him a pizza.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops