what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally.

Chuck Norris walks into a bar. Someone asks for his autograph to which he replies. "Sure"

What's worse than 10 babies in one bin? 1 baby in 10 bins.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? The wind. The wind who? ...

Knock knock Whos there? ... You got ding dong ditched

A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

Person 1: You know whats funny? Person 2: No! What? Person 1: A joke!

How do you torture Helen Keller? Leave the plunger in her toilet with the handle greased.

Yo momma so stupid, she's stupider than this joke.

Rather rich and healthy, then poor and sick.

Anyone reading this I'm not writing anything Kevin

Why are oranges blue? Wait there orange... right

Two business men, a priest and three boys are on a plane which is going down. There are only three parachutes. One business man says that they should allow the children to have the parachutes as they have long lives ahead of them. The other business man says screw the children. The priest looks up at the second business man. After a short but heated argument they all agree to let the children have the parachutes. The three children then proceed to jump out of the plane with the parachutes. The two business men and the priest watch as they descend upon the earth. The plane then crashes into a mountain, killing the business men and the priest. Once the boys were safely on land they went back to their daily lives in their individual homes. Turns out a serial killer had escaped from prison, all three children were found dead the next morning, the cause of death of course being that each had contracted some form of a sexually transmitted disease from the priest.

Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

You know what is not cool? Fire.

-Why Peter is going to mall for buying some beer? -Because he was 18 and he was able to do it.

how many jews can you fit in a volkenswagen? 2 jews in the front 2 jews in the back 15 jews in the ashtray

Q:What are black people so good at basketball? A: Because they are black!

Hey, look under there! Under what?

What did the boy in the striped pajamas get for Christmas? A shower.

Imagine that we take all of the elephants in the world and laid them out end to end in space Did you know all of the elephants would die Nature fact

Two people were walking down the street. One was assaulted.

Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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