Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because it is humanly impossible to draw a perfect circle.

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What's the thing that freaks guys out the most? When you're about to have sex with a girl and it turns out she had a penis and it's bigger than yours

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149

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? This site.

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What did the boy say when be landed in the bottom of the well, nothing he was dead.

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Someone thought that an onion was the only food that made you cry. So I threw a watermelon at his face.

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My mind is like full of holes so I cannot remember where I am anymore, and I am tired in addition, but say, what the hell is a tussle? Sounds cute, but what is that?

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Q: What did the ant say to the bush? A: Ernest Borgnine

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So there's this bigass moose, and it goes in the store and it asks the lady bitch "where the potatoes at" and the lady bitch says "down aisle 5" so the moose goes down to isle 5 and there aint no potatoes.

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Roses are red Violets are blue i suck at poems nice titz

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denisssssssssssssss

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

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Knock knock Who's there? A very long space I see what you did there

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I used to think I was indecisive, but now I am not so sure.

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I'm a vegan thats why I am still a Virgin.

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A duck walks into a bar.... Duck: Can I have a glass of water? Bartender: How would you like to pay for it? Duck: Put it on my bill

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Why did the black man break a woman's ribs? Cardiovascular resuscitation is an emergency procedure often used outside of hospitals to revive unconscious individuals before medical professionals are able to intervene. Sometimes having your life saved comes at a cost.

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A dyslexic walks into church and asks the priest. "Father is there a dog."

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Yo Mamma's so dumb... She cannot manage to find a decent job without her GED.

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What does Free Candy and a Free game online have in common? They both have viruses

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Why did the car go down the road? Someone was driving it. Why did the car stop? Because he suddenly fell and had a stroke.

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why couldnt sally help timmy pick up his ice cream? she had no arms

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops