How many dead babies does it take to paint a car? It depends on how fast you drive.

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\ \ \\ \\ >\/ 7 _.-(6' \ (=__._/` \ ) \ | / / | / > / j < _\ _.-' : ``. \ r=._\ `. \ > ,.-' >.'

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Three men walked into a bar. None were injured because they were all wearing hard hats as is the procedure for a construction site.

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Why did the quick brown fox jump in the lake? He did not see lake on the other side of the lazy dog.

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If you have read this its to late. You have already read this. Im am very sorry.

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Why can't George Washington sit up straight? He's dead.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll pop? After one hour, twelve minutes, and fifty-three seconds, Dave calculated that it approximately took 247 licks.

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roses are red violets are blue if u wanna fight call 111 ( we r in new zealand)

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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A fat guy, well over 300 lbs, goes to KFC and orders a big bucket of chicken. He gets his bucket of chicken and goes to sit down on a table to eat his chicken. A man walks up to him and asks him "are you going to share any of that chicken?" The man says "no."

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Why was the black man in prison? He was wrongly accused of a felony and the jury by whom he was tried was largely racist.

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Q: On a scale of 1 to 10, what is your favorite color of the alphabet? A: Apple

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems Nice tits

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How do we know that Adam was white? We don't. The Bible doesn't specify the race or etnicity of either Adam or Eve.

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Q: What is the answer to 255 x 23? A: A number!

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Why was the boy with no arms and legs crying? He had a lit match in his anus.

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Why was David sad? Because he got his head stuck in a window.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Being unaware of his surroundings, the chicken was startled by an oncoming motor vehicle. Due to the animals vapid logic an reasoning, based on impulse it quickly ran to the other side of the street to avoid its imminent death by the speeding automobile. Unknowingly, the chicken had reached the other side of the road,

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knock knock. whos there? the IRS you have recently filed for bankruptcy and we are repossessing your house.

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Whats black and yellow and makes you laugh? A bus full of niggers driving of a cliff

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whats two naked people in a bed? too much information

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What do you call a Jew and a black mans offspring? A human

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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