Why did the mailman cross the road? To deliver mail

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What is black and white and cant get through revolving doors? A zebra with a spear through its head.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what did the tomato say when he was cut open? nothing, because vegetables are unable to speak

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? Wave to her.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How do you kill a 6'5 black man in a dark alley? Stab him 3 times in the appendix with a 12 inch blade.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How many apple does it take to turn a fridge into a water buffalo? Yellow tactics because of the Minty fragrance

thumb_up thumb_down -2

new year new me my nigga's chilling on the couch . he'l be happy if i put my dlck inside his mouth next one: i got 4 but i give it to mr. gore when he say whats your name? me:hey my mane is Erick bryan and my puss* is wet wait nonono :D

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do humans and trees have in common? -If you hit them with an ax multiple times, they fal down

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How did the semen cross the road I put on the wrong sock this morning

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why was six afraid of seven? A: He just does.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Two women were sitting quietly.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What's big, red and eats rocks? A big, red Rock-Eater

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Knock knock Who's there? 7. And if that's you in there, 6, you better start praying.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What do you call a man who leaves his wife and kids to be with another woman? A dick.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Justin Bieber walks into a bar. He is soon kicked out as he is underage.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did Janie miss school today? Because she fell in a well.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what is big and white? the moon

thumb_up thumb_down -6

a seal walks into a bar. replace "bar" with "club". and replace "walks into" with "gets bludgeon by."

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q:What time is it when you have to go to the dentist? A: It varies. But most dental offices are open for service between 8am and 4pm

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A Banana wrote this...

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

so little jonny was doing bad in school like always so he decided to drop out and now he cant get a job and will have a terrible life and die alone

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops