Nero I know I am being a selffish bastard, but please let me speak with you for ten more minutes or so, I am sorry but its like part of me do not believe its you, we all saw your corpse, attended your funeral, please stick with me, I just feel flustered vulnerable and stupid.

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Q: How do you get an elephant in a refrigerator in three easy steps? A: You open the refrigerator door, you put the elephant inside, you close the refrigerator door. Q": How do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator in four easy steps? A": You open the refrigerator door, you take the elephant out, you put the giraffe inside, you close the refrigerator door.

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What is black and white and red all over? A half eaten zebra carcass.

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What did the man with AIDS say to the other man? I have AIDS and will most likely succumb to the disease.

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What do you call a black man on a bike? Environmentally friendly.

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What is lil Wayne's real name? Dwayne micheal carter jr.

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What did Stephen Hawking say after he scaled Mount Everest? Yay!

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what brown, red, and green and smells like poop. diareeha

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Go home and hang yourself.

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Why was the girl stupid? Because she had a low IQ

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What did the man say to his wife at the funeral. Nothing, he was dead

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Roses are red Violets are blue You're a whore

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How many licks does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? As many as it takes.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? Misthrown

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I have a black guy on my family tree. He's my cousin.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem about Red rosses and blue violets

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Yesterday i had a conversation with my husband. I asked him if he slept with another women. He said yes

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Did you hear about the dyslexic eye chart maker? His disability caused to him to have a difficult time at work and his production suffered because of this.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Wrong. Violets should be purple.

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Q: What's worse than 6 dead babies in a trash can? A: One dead baby in 6 trash cans.

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An Irish man walks past a bar... it could happen...

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A man walks into a bar. It's a fine establishment. He orders a couple of beers and takes a cab home like a responsible man would. He is then killed with a croquet mallet.

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A blonde walks into a bar. That's it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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