What did the black man say to the policeman? "Take it easy."

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A guy walks into a toilet store and there are 3 left 1is silver 1 is wood and 1 talks he took the one that talks. the next day he is shitting and he hears the toilet "do you see what i see

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Q what's worse than Tori's singing A absolutely nothing !

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? Probably 5

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Thanks, I admire your sincerity, and I am happy to see that I got a lot more in common with you, than with well, my nerdy and geeky friends, which are not reading this here and now unless they are going against their orders and messing up their own work schedule. I just want you to know that I have fallen in love with you Nero, and if that is a problem for you, please let me know ASAP.

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What did Abraham Lincoln say to his slaves? Nothing, Abraham Lincoln had no slaves.

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Knock Knock Come in

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Why can't Sally use the swings? Because she has no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there?? ... Not Sally.

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What is a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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What did the rabbit say to the man nothing animals cant talk

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My uncle said to me that life is like a box of chocolates But I'm lactose intolerant

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A Mexican, Asian, and a black guy are on a bridge, the Mexican says there is too much rice and throws some off the bridge, the Asian says there are too many burritos and throw some off the bridge, the Black says there are too many candles in his house and throws his car off the bridge. Everyone was happy and left besides the Black because he threw his car off.

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How do u get a baby to stop crawling in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor

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Q: What do you call those assholes who always volunteer in lectures? A: Assholes. Fcuking assholes. They created the word asshole. Assholes

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How do you stop a black man from committing a crime? You throw him a basket ball.

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What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

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Why did Larry drop his suitcase? Because he had no arms. A) Knock knock, B) Who's there? A) Not Larry

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Whatsthe difference between a pile of dead babies and a chicken? Chickens don't make me laugh.

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Q: What do you call a fish with no eyes? A: Fsh

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sexual offender.

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A: Ask me if I am an Orange. B: "Are you an Orange?" A: No.

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What do you call an 8 year-old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

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So a blonde was trying to peel a banana, but she couldn't because she was viciously attacked by chimpanzees and had all her fingers bitten off

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What's more depressing than watching a worm watching to worms

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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