What's worse than sibling rivalry? having no bones

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What's brown and green and if it falls out of a tree on top of you, it will kill you? A pool table

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What happened to the man who lost his job? He couldn't support his family so they all became homeless and eventually died of starvation.

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Basically

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Roses are red Violets are blue My body is ready I want you

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A man runs into a psychiatrist's office and screams, "You gotta help me doc! I just killed seven people in my office building!"

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Harry to Voldemort: Your mother is so fat, her patronus is a cake!

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There are 2 muffins in an oven One of the muffins says to the other 'Jeez it's hot in here' Then the other muffin replied, 'OH MY GOD IT'S A FRICKEN TALKING MUFFIN!!!!!!!!

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What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? They are both purple except for the rabbit.

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what did the man see in the mirror? Nothing, he was blind.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? a horse

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Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because 7, 8, 9

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What's black, smoking, and sitting at the top of the stairs? Steven Hawking after a house fire.

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What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, dogs can't speak English.

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Why did the black lady pick out a white dress? Because she thought it was a pretty white dress.

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So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

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How do you starve a Mexican? You stick him in a secure room and deprive him of food resources

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How many filthy niggers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, because I killed off all the filthy niggers.

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What is blue and angry? Mr Johnston wearing his green dress. I'm colour blind but he came round to my way of thinking in the end.

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what do you call a football team without players a group of coaches

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What do you a black man who isn't flying a plane? Well, that depends on his occupation.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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Three blondes walk into a bar. I prematurely ejaculate.

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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