There is a bird and a squirrel in a tree. Later, as a farmer walked past, the squirrel ate the bird.

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there are two muffins in an oven one muffin says "whoa, its hot in here!" the other says nothing, because it is a muffin, and the other muffin, in reality, said nothing either.

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i am predestal

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a boy with asperges asked me a question today he asked me again and again because he has asperges

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Officer i'm dot nrunk, beriously you gotta selieve me!

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Why didn't the 13 year old Black boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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So yesterday i walked into a bar, so what?

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1912, the titanic sinks, 1913 ww1 starts, 1939, ww2 starts, 1954, the vietnam war starts, 90's, cold war. wow! the 20th century sucked.

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What did the adverb say to the noun? Hopefully whale.

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a cat a dog and a penis meet up. The cat said ur lucky, when you have to pee u can go wherever you want. the dog said your lucky you can go in a litter box. the penis said your lucky u dont have to put a ballon over your head and do pushups till you throw up!!!

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How many Muslims does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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Whats white and can't climb trees? A Fridge

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My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

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Two icebears are siiting on a iceberg one says to the other: Are you fine with me pushing you off? the other one responds: Would you marry me?

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Your momma's so fat: She feels excluded by mainstream clothing outlets.

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How do you kill a circus? Go for the Juggler!

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What's the difference between 4 and 6? 2.

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Do you know what's impossible? A chink whos not smart.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? A blue waffle.

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Your mother's so fat that affects her self esteem.

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what did the dog say to the muppet? WOOF

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you will now laugh.

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Lockerbie bombing

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Why couldn't Jimmy ride a bike Jimmy is a goldfish

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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