Q : What did the construction worker get for christmas? A: Nothing a building fell on him 3 days earlier

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3 men- Greg-Allen-And James were on their way back from the bar. When the driver, Greg spun out of control. All of them died Instantly. Once they got to heaven, Jesus told them. " The better you were with Relationships, And loving just one person. The better Transportation you got." He bagan handing things out. " Well, Greg. Looks like you cheated on your most recent Girlfriend... Twice. You get a Bike." Next was Allen " Allen! Shame on you! You have dated 4 women at once! You get a Scooter!" And last was James. " James! You have stayed true to your wife! And all of your other ex- girlfriends. You get a Mustang!" Allen and Greg seen james, Sitting on his car, Upset. "Man! Whats wrong? You have the best thing you could get! I'd be happy!" James looks up and says " Thanks guys, But I just seen my Wife on A skateboard.."

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Good for him. Thats wonderful!

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why is yo mamma fat? cause she likes doughnuts

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What did the young man's clothes smell like after a long night of partying? Laundry detergent, it was quite pleasant

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Yo mamas so fat, when she jumps in a pool she displaces a disproportionate volume of water.

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What is the difference between a peasant and a pheasant? One's a bird.

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a man walks into a bar... he was shot to death because he was a slave during the 1910s

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Why is the deer afraid of the hunter? Because he doesn't want to get shot.

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Q: why did the 10 year old squirt his dad with the water hose? A: what 10 year old WOULDN'T?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? She had no purpose.

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There is no I in team... But there is a u in suck. There is no I in team, but there is in awesome

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69

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What do Michael Jordan and LeBron James have in common? They both have won NBA championships...except for Lebron.

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What did the toy cowboy say to the man? Nothing, toys can't talk.

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Why is Digimon better than Pokemon? It has a better story and character development.

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Charlie Sheen walks into a bar... Every morning, and stays until it closes... [credit gilbert gottfried]

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Why was the brick acting yellow? No, because it's allowed via Tuesday.

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what's the worst part of your kid dying the clean up

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An irishman walks into a bar and stays there until he goes home.

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What do you call a man who writes anti-jokes? Rhys, because that is my name. thank you

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How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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your mom

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Why did the woman put super glue on her sun glasses? Because she stepped on them and they broke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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