9/11

What happens when you try to rescue a cat from a tree? It jumps on your face, falls down, and dies.

A car walked into a bar... wait no it didn't it has wheels.

What do you call a women with 2 black eyes? Hopefully nothing because abuse is something that shouldn't be messed with and it is wrong.

A grasshopper goes into a bar It is stepped on and crushed.

What do you get when you run from Long Island to New Mexico? Tired.

what did the super popular, beautiful girl say to her stalker? i dont know, i wasnt the stalker.

What do Muslims and Jews have in common? Shared humanity.

how did the girl die? she read all of your terrible anti-jokes.

Why cant a black person read? Because there is nothing to read...

What’s worse than being ruled by Adolf Hitler? Being ruled by Joseph Stalin.

Q: How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? You don't. You just shut up and listen.

This Irishman walked into a pub and then drank hard liquor for the next 3 hours.

Lukas: can i have a cigarette? Scott: i dont know can you? lukas: may i? Scott: NO

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

What did the boy say to his dad when he realized he was gay? Dad, I'm gay.

Why was Armando unable to be found by his friend Ashley ? A: They both were murdered 7 years ago, and bodies are unable to do anything if they lost their soul that was with that body.

How do you stop a baby from crying? You hit it with an axe.

What do you call a dead black person? A corpse.

Obama 2012

no really what are ur names?

Yo mama is so fat that she is in a diet and wants to lose weight by eating healthy.

What do a grape and an airplane have in common? They both have wings! except not the grape.

yo momma is so tall shes tall

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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