More mindfuck "government hypnosis edition": What can doctors possibly do in order for you to wait enough for them to come to help you? They call you "their PATIENT!" Moral: So be patient and wait, oh thee brainwashed.

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What did the man say after falling off the bridge? Nothing. He died a painful and terrible death on impact.

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A plane crashes on the border of the United States and Canada. Where do they bury the survivors? Why would they bury the survivors? THEY'RE ALIVE

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Q- if a small quiz is a quizicle then whats a small test A- a testicle

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Why didn't the man have a vagina? Trick Question. Everybody has a vagina.

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Were can you find a bag of meth? A drug dealer

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Why couldn't Johnny drive? Because he had no arms or legs. Why didn't he have any arms or legs? Because Johnny was a potato.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing. They don't live on the same continent.

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Knock knock whos there punctuation

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Roses are red Violets are blue... No they are not they come in many different colors from cross breeding and different environments.... YOU ARE WRONG

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Hello

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square circles have souls but gingers do not CC

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Why did the man have an extremely large nose? It just so happens that both his father and mother had large noses as well and nature took it's course.

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whats wierder than two lesbians kissing two homos kissing

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There's a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. Just kidding! Redheads arn't real.

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what's white and sticky? mayonnaise.

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What do you call a giraffe without a neck? Dead.

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what did the duck say to the dog. quack

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" The owner of the horse then explains the evolution of the species and genetics. The bartender, satisfied, serves the owner a drink and gladly gives the horse water.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing hide and seek with Dennis Ferguson

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How do you get 100 people in one car. You can't.

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2 peanuts were walking down the street, one was a salted .. the other was raped

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To go to the slaughter-house.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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