Why is Ray Charles always smiling? He's not, corpses rarely smile

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How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends on its sex. Females weigh 150-250kg, and males weigh upwards of 350kg.

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Q: What's worse than the holocaust? A: 2 Holocausts

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Why was the black man tangled in chains at the bottom of the ocean? Because he was a highly skilled diver and environmentalist who tragically entangled himself and consequently died slowly and painfully of suffocation while trying to save a whale from eating waste metal.

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A guy walked up to me and said "I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam, I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam." I promptly informed the authorities. He was transported to a mental institution and I later learned that he swallowed his own tongue and died. Nobody attended his funeral.

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How do a jew, an African, and u white man stop a train? They pull the breaks

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Knock knock (who's there) Orange ( orange who) orange you glad to see

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How do you get rid of a pile of dead babies? Call 911 so someone will pick them up and take them to the morgue.

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Knock, knock. Knock, knock. Knock, knock. Guess no ones home.

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A mormon walked into a bar and realised it was a bar the he leaves

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Why couldn't little sally swim? Because she had weights on her ankles.

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I once saw a small Italian man wearing trainers with a smart suit. He looked like an idiot, but I considered the option that he may not have had any money left after buying the suit to buy shoes. Exercising diplomacy, I left him be and enjoyed a nice meal with he and his trainers.

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Why the guy without two hands at the beach was so excited? Because he couldn't scratch his asshole.

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What's the difference between getting hit by a car and being struck by lightning? Impossible to tell, they are 2 entirely different circumstances with limited certainties.

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what do you call a brown man that has been repeatedly shanked and has been fucked up the arse by 10 Rag heads in one night and thrown in a well to slowly and painfully die? Lloyd.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Actually they're purple That's why they're called "violets"

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What do you call 10 black people swimming down a current? A happy family

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what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch names

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

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so a mom is like so what you want hunny and the dad goes like you baby bahahahahaa get it?

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What do you get when you cross black man and a Hispanic woman A child that is a combination of both ethnic groups

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LIKE THIS!

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What happenend after the chicken tried to cross the road? a KFC opend

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An Irish man walks out of a bar..... 'nuff said

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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