Neither have I

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender says, "What's up?" The man replies, "The opposite of down."

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the baby monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Chocolate rain Awesome!

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Why can't you lie to atoms? Because they make up everything!

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Chickens want to live in a world where they arent judged for cossing a road ......... K?

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Three men walk in to a bar, One ducked

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a black guy and a mexican are in the backseat of a car, who's driving the car? the owner of the car.

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To mama's so fat when she went to Dairy Queen she Ordered a blizzard.

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One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

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Q: How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? A: They beat her.

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how do you kill a blond? there are many ways but every one of them is illegal and could be criminally chargeable.

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I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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Doctor, doctor, I think I've got a problem! Correct, you have got acute cancer, you have 2 months to live.

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Why did Suzy drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Suzy!

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What's black, white, and red all over? The color scheme. Except for the black and white. They're shades.

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How do you make a baby stop crying? Make it smell its own diaper then, drown it in its own tears.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are trapped on a deserted island when they come across a magic lamp. The brunette rubs the lamp and a genie appears! The genie offers them each a wish. They all make their wishes, but none of them come true as the genie was simply a hallucination brought on by severe trauma and dehydration.

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why did the man french kiss the horse? because he was high on l.s.d and confused the horse for an attractive male because he himself was homosexual ps vagina monkeys and chili

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A blond, a brunette and a redhead are all trapped on a desert island. They work together and manage to survive until help arrives.

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What do you call a Mexican baptism? A blessed occasion.

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Why did the retirement home go out of business. There was a fire and all of the residents charred to death accept for a couple who escaped but were too traumatized to return to the old folks home.

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This is a haiku The second line is longest Hippopotamus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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