A homeless man stumbles upon $100 bill. It is actually just a food wrapper, his eyesight is lackluster.

Yo mamma so fat she has to have anti biotics to keep her alive

This guy walks up to the bartender, and says to him, " ill bet you $100 that i can piss in this cup from 20 ft away." The bartender laughs, thinking hes gonna get an easy 100 bucks. he says "ok, u do that and ill watch." the guy says "ok but one second." he then walks over to this table full of guys and the bartender see him and them whispering and shaking heads. then the guys walks back over, and says to the bartender, "ok here i go" then he whips out his wang and starts pissing all over the place,all over the bartender, the counter, everywhere but the cup. Meanwhile the bartenders laughing, because he thinks he made some easy money. then the bartender asks the guy for his money and the guy says, "alright one minute." then the guys walks over to the table full of guys and they al start pulling out money and give it to him. so the guy walks over to the bartender and says, "here you are, your 100 bucks" the bartender notices him smileing and says "u just lost 100 bucks why are you happy?" and the guy says, " you see that table full of guys over there? well, i bet them all $500 dollars that i could piss all over you, your counter and all of your things, and that youd not only be happy about it, but youd laugh!!!"

Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

Q:What did the deaf kid say to the blind kid? A: nothing deaf kids can't talk they can only have conversations with their hands,which would be pretty useless at this moment cause the blind kid can't see his hand guestures

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, That's what they tell me because I'm blind.

two boys break out in a verbal fight. the first boy says your so stupid youd sell a cow for a gallon of milk. the second boy replied, i agree with you 110%.

A. Wanna Hear a funny joke? B. Yes! A. The WNBA.

what is the difference between a black person and a picnic bench? A picnic bench can support a family.

What do you call 100 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean 100 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean

A man stuck his diick in a blender He had a "penis shake" for breakfast

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a big dick, Lets have sex.

what the orphan boy get for christmas? Not his parents

Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homosexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual pandas just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homosexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

1,2 Freddy's Coming For You 3'4 Better Lock Your Doors 5'6 Grab Your Crucifix 7'8 Stay Up Late 9'10 Never Sleep Again Bonus 11'12 He's Gonna See You In Hell

whats worse than the holocaust? Nothing you should be worrying about the future not the past.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Dwayne. Ok... come in.

Why did the pig have a band-aid? Because he had a whole in his foot.

Why did my son fall off of his bicycle? Because I hit him with a steak.

Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: It varies largely by hipster, the same way it does with any other person.

What did the cow say to the other cow? How should i know? Go ask them.

Q: What is the difference between a black man and a Park bench? A: A park bench is an inanimate object.

so your snowboarding in the dessert and all four of your tires pop. how many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house. the answer is B. 500 squids

A man is standing on the street corner waiting for the bus. As it pulls up he steps on and pays his fare while he whistles to his iPod.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...