What did the boy say after smoking weed for the first time? -"I don't really feel anything" and his friends explained that is sometimes the case for a first time smoker.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ada! Ada who? Ada burger for lunch!

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Rachel: Wanna hear a conundrum? Robby: Sure! Racheal: Vampire Value card.

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A gay man takes another gay man home after a wild night at the city's top club. They choose to be safe and not have gay sex.

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A child logs on to antijoke.com he is a chronic masturbator

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Dave: Hi John! John: I have Aids.

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Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

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Why did the mushroom go to the party? Because he was a fungi.

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Your mama is so fat she is morbid obese.

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Whats worse then a hundred dead babies? One trying to eat its way out.

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What's worse than finding half a sticker in your apple Half a worm

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What's similar between my butthole and shampoo? They both smell good, except for by butthole.

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The air is green The grass is blue I'm bot stoned.. I'm just high

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Three men walked into a bar. None were injured because they were all wearing hard hats as is the procedure for a construction site.

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How does Helen Keller do her taxes? Unfortunately, she doesn't. Her friends have strongly encouraged her to proactively contact the IRS to see if she can undergo a repayment plan of some sort and obtain governmental assistance for her future filings.

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A man walks into a bar.

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why did miles cross the road? Because hes gay

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What is worse then dropping the soap? Not being able to pick it back up.

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What did the racist white guy say to the black guy? Nigger

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Robin, get in the batmobile

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A: knock knock B: the door is open, why don't you come right in?

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Whats wrong Nero? What happened? Please pick up the phone, I am trying to call you, but it just goes from dialing to changing tunes, please do not be upset with me, what did I do wrong? I thought we had an understanding, please just pick up the phone, if you already have my number and all you got nothing to lose...

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Have you seen the new Spiderman movie yet? No, Uncle ben hasn't seen it either.

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What happens when you ask a blind guy to drive you somewhere? What happens if you ask a blind guy to drive? You will end up in a four way accident with 8 people dead 2 of which children and 1 baby. You might survive but the blind guy won't so you will have to go to court for him on the issue. You realize that you are terrible when it comes to the law and you get yourself thrown in jail for 2 years. When you get out you are so tired of getting butt raped that you go out and do it to someone else. Then you go back to jail an the process repeats it's self because this is the American justice system. We could work on it a little bit. But yeah, don't ask a blind guy to drive, your butt says thanks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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