An Octopus walks into a bar and sees that there are multiple people with instruments. The man with the Guitar says "I bet you cant play the Guitar better than Led Zeplin?" So the Octopus plays and he is better than Led Zeplin. Then the man with the Piano says "I bet you can't play the piano better than Elton John?" So the Octopus Plays it better than Elton John. The Last man from Scotland says " i bet you can't plat the bagpipes better than me?" So... The Octopus is playing around with the Bagpipes and they say to him "Hurry Up!" and the Octopus says "Shut up, I'm trying to have sex with it but first I need to get it's pajamas off" (Bagpipes have 8 long things you blow into and they have a pattern that looks like a pajama pattern) hahaha

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Kony 2012 - Uganda Be Kidding Me

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how do you know Newcastle are losing? its 5 past 3

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I can see you under there. Under what?

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You walk into a shopping centre, what wont you see? Madelin McCann.

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What's worse than stepping on chewing gum A clown throwing bricks at orphans

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why did the drug dealer die... because he got terminal cancer and died during the first 3 weeks

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- What's the difference between a gay man and a refrigerator? - The refrigerator doesn't fart when you take your meat out.

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Aaron Pfeifer likes men

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why did the skeleton drop his juice? Because he has no stomach LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLO

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A: Knock Knock B: Who's there? A: The Police. We have a warrant for your arrest.

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how do you tell the difference between a jew and a muslim? you ask them what their religion is.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It would be unlikely for any entity of this time to speak English and communicate with chickens so it is improbable for one to know the answer.

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What do you call a group of white males wearing hoods and setting fires? Cold

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Why do they censor everything on here? Because **** **** ******* *** ***** *****.

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What's the difference between a poodle and a noodle? Scaboodle!

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whats worse than the holocaust ? ms.brinkmann? noo close....a black guy trying toget a job.

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Knock, Knock Come in

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Knock Knock!! Who's There? No one, your being ding dong ditched!

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Q: What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep? A: A genetic aberration that is an insult to both God and man.

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What if your name was Mr. David and the office called you down and you were wearing a dress?

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a woman votes!

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A man walks into a haunted house and screams. He had arrows on a nail.

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A women president

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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