What time is it when an elephant sits on your watch? I don't know, I don't have a watch anymore.

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When I grow up, I don't want to be a therapist. I have enough trouble figuring out the problems in my math book.

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A man has had too many beers late at night. The bartender says "Sir, I'm going to have to cut you off"

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why did sally fall off the swing? because she was a fish.

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So, you got to take medications daily or die? Are you in pain my dear?

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How do u know a black woman is pregnant? When she pulls out a tampon it has no cotton on it.

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whats the difference between my mom and your mom nothing they are both sluts

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How many sheets did the Asian want on his bed? "You sheet on my bed I kill you!"

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse's mother had terminal cancer

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If i had a dollar for every time Lindsay Lohan Crashed a vehicle......i would be rich

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Guy1: Hey! Do you want to hear a potassium joke? Guy2: Sure! Guy1: K

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What doesn't kill you makes you stronger....... unless it is a nonkiller disease that makes you extremely weak :D

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What goes in your mouth long and hard, and comes out soft and sticky? A stick of bubblegum.

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Whats the best thing about having sex with twenty eight year olds? There's twenty of them.

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Two men walked into a bar. The third man ducked.

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What's the difference between 6th graders and Jews? 6th graders make it back from camp. :)

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Did you know that every 60 seconds in Africa a minute passes

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Gay's

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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An elephant and a hippopotamus were taking a bath. The elephant said to the hippo, " Please pass the soap." The hippo replied, "No soap, radio."

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Your mom is so ugly that she is still a virgin, you don't exist you're just a figment of my imagination.\

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? Using teamwork and coordination, each can place one foot on the seat of the stool, and using each other for balance and support, they can all stand on the stool. The fact that they are gay is irrelevant.

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Knock knock It's open, come in.

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Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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