How do you create an antijoke? Story written by Danny and Patrick

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because he was dead. Q: Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? A: Because he was stapled to the monkey.

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What has 4 legs and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you a pool table

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Knock knock Who's there? Benjamin Benjamin who? Benjamin Dover Ben! I'm so glad you're home the kids have missed you so much!

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If three men were rowing a rowboat backwards across your front lawn, and six of the four back wheels fell off, how many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house? 17 because footballs don't have feathers.

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whats worse than the holocaust? Nothing you should be worrying about the future not the past.

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Knock Knock Who's there Nobody is here. This is just a feeble attempt of your subconsious to convince yourself you have someone who cares about you in the least bit to mask the horrible wretched pain of loneliness and suffering that is the enternal damnation of your life.

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What did the turtle say to the hare? Nothing. Animals can't speak.

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Q: Where is the best place to hide a black persons food stamps? A: In their wallet so they can go to the grocery store and support their family with the little amount of help they get.

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A Rabbi, A Priest and an Imam walk into a bar. The Imam doesn't order a drink because it is strictly against his religious beliefs.

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If a plane crashes on the boarder of Canada and The U.S.A- Where would they burry the survivors.

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Why couldn't the bird fly? cause it was a penguin

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What kind of bee's make milk? Booobies!

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A man stumbles across a magic lamp. He doesn't believe in genies, so he sells it for profit on the antiquarian market.

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what did the kid say when pee-wee was about to rape him ...huh just make it quick

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Q: What happens when you throw a glowing purple rock into a bright green stream? A: It makes a splash

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Knock Knock .....................Oh it was just the TV

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My heart is in my hands. Or maybe it's yours. Either way it's mine now. You won't need it anymore.

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Why is this website funny? Because it has jokes on it.

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2 doctors are talking to each other? -Dead? -Dead.

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Excuse me, I have a shitload of stuff to do, so you are Eliza huh? I thought that was just one person conveying something to someone. Anyway, what is your name? My name is actually Nero, but you do not strike me as an Eliza, first name is more than enough. You know, if you dare, Ill be back shortly, I was gonna shower but then again, I haven't moved at all today, so yeah. Saved you? I have never saved anyone well, excuse me then, see you around, worry less about people bothering with us chatting, hell they might risk learning something (not a chance, people here are fucking jackasses, with one exception, and I do not mean me this time).

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Where can you find elephants? That depends on where you leave them.

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Whats the difference between a car and a baby? I would have a hard time throwing a car.

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what do you do with a fat little chug...kick em in the guts

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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