What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a hammer and the other one is a watermelon.

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What do u call a woman geometry teacher. Santains wife.

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What do you call a kid with one arm and an eye-patch? Names.

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Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? Ones fun to hit with a sledgehammer. The other one is a watermelon.

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A man walks into a bar and sees a large jar filled to the brim with $20 bills. He asks the bartender why there is so much money in the jar, and the bartender tells him that he has a horse in the back of the building, and he has a bet that if someone puts $20 in the jar and can make the horse laugh, then they will win all the money. The man, feeling confident, puts his money into the jar and tries to make the horse laugh. It is a horse, so of course he cannot make it laugh. He leaves, dejectedly, having just wasted 20 of his hard earned dollers.

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You're American when you enter the the bathroom and you're American when you exit the bathroom. What are you while you're inside the bathroom? Using the bathroom.

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Q. How many Jews can you fit in a car? A. Four, I drive a Volkswagen Jetta

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one. He might have trouble focusing, but his ADHD in no way prevents him from completing such a task.

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What's a Mexicans favourite video game? It depends on his/her personal preferences.

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How do you get a bear out of tree? You shoot it

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get away from a gigantic tiger slowly stalking him

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There are two muffins sitting in an oven. One muffin says "It sure is hot in here." The other muffin says "Holy shit a talking muffin

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What did the duck say to the mouse? Quack!

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Aodhan Hearty

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I have sexdaily. I mean dyslexic. Fcuk!

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why did the man lose his testicle? he had cancer

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HAHA HEHE... WOW that was a good one! i didn't get it...

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? A read along book

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Me: did u here the one about the girl got hit by a car? Man: no what happened? Me: She is in the hosspital with slight fractures and a broken wrist, but she will live

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? Shoes

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Q: What did bulbasoar say to charmander? A: Bet ya thought I was gunna say Bulbasoar!!

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Ask me if i'm a fish. Are you a fish? Do I look like a fish?

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A man walks into a bar. Q: What's the apple doing on your head? A: Peach? It's not pear. It's banana.

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The turd said crazy turd so many cows have ninety two ears and it walked away to the store and drank doors while juggling feces and racist jack-o-lanterns.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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