Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Roses are red.

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Wuts brown and smelly? Brown smelly stuff.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Justin Bieber is having sex with a girl. He then awakes from this horrible nightmare.

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Q. Why was little Timmy crying? A. Because his sister died of cancer.

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what happens when a jew meets a black person answer: they greet one another

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Did you know that if you rearrange the letter in "Gill Lube", you can spell "Gullible"?

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Let's go burn down an orphanage, what are they gonna do tell their parents?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt, it got stuck at a red light, it waited 5 minutes before getting frustrated and leaving. Later that day the chicken realized that it had forgotten to press the button.

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I slipped and fell in the shower today. Good thing my dad caught me

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why did the boy die? because he got shot

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the KFC man was chasing him.

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What do Bear Grylls drink under breakfast? Tea.

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Q: Why couldn't the black man swim? A: Because ever since he was a child, he has never taken swimming lessons before.

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Q: what's green and fluffy? A: green fluff

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Why was the fat kid the last one to lunch? He'd had lead bricks stapled to his ankles by the skinny kids.

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What's red and has a mask ? Blood, I lied about the mask.

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How do you get five black men in a car? You offer them a good deal, then show them the car fax.

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how many people does it take to take over the world aperently just 1 me

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I don't usually drink beer, but when I do it usually doesn't take much for me to feel the effects of intoxication.

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What do you call a loser on a game? A Dirty Hacker

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A classic (apologies if it's been posted before): A woman was riding the bus home after a day of shopping. Suddenly she jumped up, shouting "may aspirins! My aspirins!" The driver replied: "You probably left them on the counter at the drugstore."

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Q. What happened first The Tree or The Apple. A. Johny Appleseed.

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting into the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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