Doctor, doctor, it hurts when I hit my head with a hammer!! Dont hit your head with a hammer anymore.

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an object in motion continues to stay in motion unless acted upon by an external force :)

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What's the difference between a black businessman and a white businessman? Their skin colour.

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How many Nazis does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. Their domestic handiness was not impeded by their warped sense of entitlement and racial superiority.

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You can teach a man to fish but you cant teach a fish to man

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Science debated on whether Dinosaur hide was like leather But though quite absurd They thought, like a bird Velociraptor was covered in feathers.

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why did the disabled man go to the shops? because he wanted a radiator panel

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When life gives you lemons, throw them at pedestrians.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Fire extinguisher? One puts out a fire the other one fuels it.

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When an intellectual was told by someone, "Your beard is now coming in," he went to the rear entrance and waited for it. Another intellectual asked what he was doing. Once he heard the whole story, he said: "I'm not surprised that people say we lack common sense. How do you know that it's not coming in by the other gate?"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I really hate poultry related jokes.

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How can you avoid being hit by a car? Don't get in the way.

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Knock knock... Whos there? The IRS, we are taking your house.

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So two muffins are in an oven. They get baked.

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What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

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What's black and white and red all over? A mime that got hit by a train

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Why is it when birds fly in a "V" shape one side is longer? There's more birds on that side.

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what did th teacher say to the student? be quiet and do our work

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You're mom is so slutty, she has sex with many men.

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17

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Where's Stevin Hawkins? He went for a walk.

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Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

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A black man walks into a sporting goods store and pulls out a gun! Then he returns it and leaves.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A painting with black, white and red paint.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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