Why doesn't Michael sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

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if a green person is sitting on a green couch in his green room in his green house on his green lawn in his green town, what color is the sky? blue of course. while it is possibe to paint or make all things described in the above paragraph, you cannot paint the sky green because it is actually the color of light when the suns rays reflect on the water droplets within the ozone layer, thus forming the sky. the sky is not a tangible object, so therfore the paint would not be able to properly rest and dry onto the surface.

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Roses are red violets are blue come on love show me you boobs/by kw

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Why did Susie fall off her swing? She had no arms Nock nock Who's there? Not Susie.

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Roses are red, violetes are red, I'm colorblind

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How do you confuse a blonde? The same way you confuse a brunette or redhead, hair color has nothing to do with an individual's intelligence.

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What's worse than sibling rivalry? having no bones

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What's brown and green and if it falls out of a tree on top of you, it will kill you? A pool table

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What happened to the man who lost his job? He couldn't support his family so they all became homeless and eventually died of starvation.

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Basically

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Roses are red Violets are blue My body is ready I want you

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A man runs into a psychiatrist's office and screams, "You gotta help me doc! I just killed seven people in my office building!"

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What happened to the man who posted yet another repeated joke on anti joke? Nothing. He posted an old joke that everyone has seen a form of already.

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Harry to Voldemort: Your mother is so fat, her patronus is a cake!

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There are 2 muffins in an oven One of the muffins says to the other 'Jeez it's hot in here' Then the other muffin replied, 'OH MY GOD IT'S A FRICKEN TALKING MUFFIN!!!!!!!!

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What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? They are both purple except for the rabbit.

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what did the man see in the mirror? Nothing, he was blind.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? a horse

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Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because 7, 8, 9

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What's black, smoking, and sitting at the top of the stairs? Steven Hawking after a house fire.

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What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, dogs can't speak English.

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Why did the black lady pick out a white dress? Because she thought it was a pretty white dress.

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So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

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How do you starve a Mexican? You stick him in a secure room and deprive him of food resources

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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