Man: Drink this. Man 2: Ok. (Drinks it) Man; You drank a powerful substance that is 20000 times stronger than hydrochloric acid! Man2: Oh FUCK! Kelvin Yang.

Why'd I have sex with your mom? I'm your father and I love your mother very much

Knock Knock. F uck off.

What is worst than a1000 baby's stapled to a tree? 1 baby stapled to 1000 trees.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He had a heart attack

What happens when you roll a quarter down the street in Mexico? It rolls for a small period of time but eventually it falls over and stops rolling because quarters aren't able to roll very far on imperfect surfaces.

Q:How many pieces of paper can one tree make? A:Trees cannot make paper, people make paper from trees. So the answer is none, a tree can't make any paper whatsoever.

Have you ever heard the story of Mikey Braford? Every morning when he was little, his father would fill a gym sock with nickels and beat him with it. Mikey has severe attachment disorder and frequent suicidal thoughts.

A farmer was robbed and complained to the sheriff's department that he suspected it was a black man behind the crime. "How do you know this for sure?" The sheriff asked him. He replied, "I chased him into the night, it was dark and I couldn't see him"

balls

Where do black jews go? The back of the oven

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A drum set.

What did the black boy get for Christmas? A bike his parents bought him.

Why is the fat kid laying on the ground crying? Because I hit him with a shovel

I road a horse to school. My friend stabbed it with a Javelin and screamed.... The horse was his Dad

whats long and green? weed

what do you call a person who rides a bike a lot? BATMAN!!! -s.s

Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducked.

EGGPLANT

Q: What's worse then stubbing your toe? A: Coming home from school and your house is burnt down and your whole family is dead.

How did the fat woman survive the car accident? She had on her seat belt.

Why doesnt the ladder work? A ladder is an inaminent object therefore imcapable of having a job.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have ADD Hey look, a squirrel!!

Did you know that in the country of Nigeria, every minute, 60 second passes?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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