Why is it impossible to travel faster than the speed of light? Because it travels pretty darn fast.

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Wanna hear a bathroom joke? YOU TRYIN' TO KILL US?!?

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Yo momma so fat, when she walks she wakes the dead -Ryan Vallee

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What part of a vegetable are you not supposed to eat? His wheelchair.

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A blind duck walks under a coffee table. Luckily, it was shorter that the table, walked underneath, and continued unharmed. Then it was eaten by a cat it couldn't see.

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What is striped black and white? A prisoner in jail arrested for the murder of a 7 year old child.

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Knock knock Who's there? Banana Banana who? Orange Orange who? Banana Banana who? I have AIDS

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Q: What did the gun say to the person. A: Bang.

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How do you scare a blonde? Paint yourself yellow and call yourself big bird.

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How do you tell a bunch of Chinese people apart? Go up to each one and ask them their first and last names. The chances of any of them being the same is quite slim, giving each person their own identity.

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I Love You Jordan! P.S. from someone you know

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I am in love with pizza. It was a friday night and i was hanging around with my so called friends 'banana-rama' 'pearman' and 'peaches' (keep in mind these are all fruit). I ordered a pizza from Poker Pizza and it came an hour later i brung it to my kitchen and i opened the box. It was lovely. I eat it, i soon realized that I had eat my one true love and decided to order another pizza.

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everyone. - Blake Woodman

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How do you know what time it is in the dark? Turn on the light and look at the clock.

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What do you call a black woman who had 4 abortions? A Crimestopper

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How do you stop a rhino from charging? Try not to antagonise it.

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Q. How do you know when you've had too much too drink? A. Your dead(No because when your dead you can't think.)

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What do you call it when you have sex with a black man? Sex

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h

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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What happens 2 seconds after you thorw a rock out a two-story window? The rock hits the ground.

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Why was the little Jewish girl sad? Because neo-Nazis killed her family.

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whats deead and gone lewis`s dog. well now it is

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What has feathers, and is known to fly? A bird

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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