Once upon a time a girl took a gun and shot herself in the face

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You know your in Houston when... The highway sign says so.

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What is terrible and doesn't exist? This joke's punchline,

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What did the piano say to the ice cube? Dude, get back in the freezer or you are going to melt!

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What did Stephen Hawking say to his daughter? Nothing, his illness prevents him from talking. And letting a high-tech wheelchair make human sounds isn't talking!!!

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What should you do when a man carrying a stuffed tortoise tries to break into your house? Call the police.

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What really killed the dinosaurs? ME!!!

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A joke were created last night and was so funny! But this is not the case

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A white guy, a black guy, and a spanish guy jump off a building. They all die on impact and their families mourn their loss for years to come.

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A bear woke up from his annual hibernation to find that his stomach is growling. "I sure am hungry." the sleepy bear said. So he found some berries, but spit them out. "These berries are far too bitter." the playful bear said. He then found some honey, however was soon bombarded with a swarm of bees. "That honey is good, but not that good." the jolly bear said. He then stumbled upon a cabin. "I wonder if there is any food in here..." the curteous bear wondered. The events that followed are now reffered to by the locals as the May 20th Massacre. While no witnesses survived, the police reports depict that the Martinez family, a young family of 7 enjoying their memorial day weekend in their New Hampshire cabin, was brutally slain by a blood-thirsty animal who tracked each of them throughout the house in a period of approximately 45 minutes.

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Why are anti jokes funny? You can trick an old person to think they are

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I like my women how i like my coffee. Without a penis.

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What did the student say to the teacher, after being assigned homework? This isn't my best subject, can I stay after class for tutoring?

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Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: nobody knows, but the road was royally pissed off.

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The grass is always greener on the side that uses manure and fertilizer daily.

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Do you like fishsticks? Ya, me too.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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Where did Little Johnny go when the bomb hit? Everywhere.

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I'm gonna put my nut-sack on your drum set

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You smell like ass, And no one loves you!

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What did the blonde say to the priest? Probably something stupid due to the fact that she's blonde.

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There was a blonde, a redhead, and a brunette on an island. This island is called England, and this situation tends to happen a lot.

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what do asians do in asian history month, nothing, it does not exist, hahaha

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Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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