In my eyes Nero, you are much like a philosopher, the kind which are mocked while they live, and then a couple thousands years later, are recognized as the most intelligent beings of their time.

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What do you call a prostitute with morals? Ironic.

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Where did the little boy go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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Q: What did the bulbasaur say to the charmanderr?? A: bulbasaurrr

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How come Pluto and Goofy are both dogs, but Goofy can talk and Pluto can't? Because Goofy can walk on two legs, and is therefore superior to Pluto in Walt Disney's eyes.

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Why can't vegetarians eat mushrooms because I can't urinate over a scotch bonnet :/

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Okay so there was a turtle, a pig, and a donkey. They were out fishing when suddenly they spot a man in boat. The man said he hasn't eaten in 5 days and he is very hungry. He looked at the turtle and said "no, too much shell." The turtle was happy and left. He looked at the pig and said "no, too much fat." The pig ran away and was very happy. He looked at the donkey and said "I think I'll have donkey today." The donkey ran away because he was scared. The man died from hunger.

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Q - What do you call a hamburger without pickles? A - You call it a hamburger just without the pickles.

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whant to hear my best inpression of a hijacking ok kjgnkdgsjikdfhjnknkdfngknhfkfbnkf

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what do you call a man with blue eyes??? a man with blue eyes

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why do elephants drink so much? to try to forget.

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how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? Not enough

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How many babies can you fit in an oven? Depends how hungry you are.

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Hey I just met you. And this is crazy. So get in my van. Cause I have candy.

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Man walks into a bar and goes, "Ouch!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house. "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "The chicken"

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you know why people who read anti-jokes are stupid? i just had the greatest sex ever!!

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Whats red and smells like cherries? Cherries

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Some poems rhyme This doesn't.

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what did the robot say to the centipede? "Stop being a centipede!" It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has he!

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What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? A quarter ponder with cheese.

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Whats black and yellow and makes you laugh? A bus full of niggers driving of a cliff

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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