A man comes home late from work what does he find? His wife and children murdered.

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What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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Why did the man commit a serious crime? Because he couldn't think of any funny crimes.

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Yo mamma so mexican she brought tacos to the dinner table

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Your friend is so gay that he came out of the closet and was accepted warmly by his friends and family for who he is a human being.

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A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She complied and saw the error of her statement.

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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Justin Bieber had sex with a woman.

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why did the football coach go to the bank? to make a deposit into his account

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What did walt disney say to the Jew? Nothing. Walt Disney didn't know the man was Jewish and didn't have time to make himself acquainted with the fellow.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Diarrhea

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Want to hear a joke? ... Oh dear, I can't think of any. Golly, this is embarrassing.

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The street outside of my house is covered in jelly. I have done this.

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why was tommy so sad?............because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Why was the man waiting at the bus stop? He was on his way to work

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Whats the difference between a truck full of dead babies and a truck full of bowling balls? You can't pick up the bowling balls with a pitchfork.

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Why was the man worried? because he had a shotgun up his ass

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Your mother is so ugly that when she looks in the mirror she feels bad about her appearance.

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A: Knock Knock B: (No Reply) Nobody is home and the man trying to get in will come back later and try again.

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how do u piss of a polish man? rape his girlfriend

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Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? -- Because she had no arms Why did sally drop her ice cream? -- Because she got ran over by the ice cream truck

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what did the cow say to shabab?....... want some milk

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a women.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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