How much wood would a wood-chuck chuck, If a wood chuck could chuck wood? A full study has never been commissioned into the amount of wood chucked by a groundhog and thus far remains an unknown quantity. ls

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Doctor! Doctor! Everyone seems to be stealing things! Piss off, I am a doctor not a detective you prick.

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Roses are red, Violets are BLACK!

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Why did the man bring the computer to the doctor because it had a virus

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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Did you fall from heaven? Because I seem to notice fractures to your knee, spine and a possible permanent risk of poor posture.

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What do you call something you should prepare yourself for when having sex with a prostitute? A.I.D.S

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Why did the black person got to Wal-mart? Wal-mart has relatively low prices

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Why did the kid punch the other kid. Because he was black.

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I think everybody should have a penis.

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why was the jewish man so sad because his family was killed in a bus accident and he severed his spine and cant walk ever again and his insurance couldunt pay for the bill so he is now bankrupt so he borrowed from the mafia and now owes them 100,000 in a year or they will cut off his fingers and gauge out his eyes

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A duck walked into a bar and said "ouch."

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Why did the cat eat the cupcake? Cause he was hungry.

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What's the difference between Jordan and Time? Time passes!!

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why did the little girl fall off the swing? she was a double amputee.

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What did the pirate say when his parrot died? Nothing. He was upset and didn't really feel like talking.

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Two drunk drivers got in a car crash They both died

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What did the Irish nun say on her deathbed? "I now realize that smoking was an unhealthy habit and I regret that I made the choice to do so." Then she died

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Magic is another word for "poorly perceived analysis of the mechanics of this complex instrumentality we call optical illusion."

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i am a slasher, a slasher of prices to get to the other side. poop goo goo gaga

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wanna hear a joke? womens rights!

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Q: IMAGINE that your in a heart racing battle with a huge grizzly bear when suddenly a bird picks you up and carries you to china and leaves you on the adge of a cliff which then you are chased by warriors and are forced to jump off the edge. What do you do? A: Wake up

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What the difference between a mexican family and a bench? The bench can support the family

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Your mum is so fat, she has a larger bmi than someone with a healthy bmi

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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