You know it's sunny outside when you go outside and its sunny

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Why didn't the teen girl get to her appointment? A) She woke up late.

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Why did the baby cry? Because his parents dropped him on his head.

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A Homosexual, a platypus, and a rubber spoon walk into a bar...

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Hey I had a wet and dirty dream about you last night. Really? What happened? You got hit by a bus and I pissed myself laughing. .......

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Sigh... You know life, you start all optimistic and "I am going to be wealthy mommy and stuff" Then you know, life turns not quite out like you planned it, and, well, you wish you had made some other choices you know what I mean... Your grades where not that good, that girl you really loved did not like you back, you know what I mean right? ...Well I don't, how is it like?

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What do you call a tub full of water? A bathtub!

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, and I'm blind .

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What call a black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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One day my dog ran away. We drove around for a long time looking for it.

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A horse walks in to a bar. The bartender asks: "why the long face?" The horse didn't respond, because it's a horse.

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men, men like men= men+bed

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They then proceed to bake into tasty pastries which are then eaten for snacks or maybe a light breakfast.

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three blondes are walking along the beach on a desert island, they each have plans to escape. The first swims off the island but is swept in with the current back to land The second blonde burns an SOS into the sand using a rock and twigs-the wind blows it out The third, realising how immature her freinds were, reaches into her pocket and pulls out her mobile phone and begins dialling the coast guard.

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Your mom is so fat when she sat on wallmart she lowered the prices

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Knock knock! Who's There? @HurricaneKris4 on Twitter Ok I'll follow you...

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What's the difference between uranium and plutonium? Blast radius

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What did the Democrat say to the Republican? "I am sorry about your mother". They had been good friends since childhood and the Republicans mother was soon to die from terminal cancer.

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Q: Why did the Honey Badger cross the road? A: Honey Badger don't care!!!

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm What is worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Finding chuck norris Whats worse than finding your girlfriend has a bigger Slong than you? Getting raped with a cheese grater. Whats worse than all of these? Being black Sadly im black :( -Jordan M

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What is black and white and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

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Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can swim on land... it's called having a swimming pool

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What did the strawberry say to the strawberry? Nothing because strawberries are fruit and can't talk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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