VITAMIN C!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the cow cross the road? He was in the moooooooood.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you get a blonde to stop talking? Hit her in the head with a brick.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How do you keep children off your lawn? Touch them.

thumb_up thumb_down

You might not notice at first, but in this very sentence there is a psychological phrase that is used to hypnotise you. If you read through the first sentence of this paragraph three or four times, you may start to feel the sudden urge to have a drink. This is called the ashvakalym effect.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

ask me if i have a place to call home> 'have you a place to call home?' no im sad and lonely.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q: Whats worse than finding 10 babies in a trash can? A: Finding 1 baby in 10 trash cans!

thumb_up thumb_down -42

What has ears, but can't hear, eyes, but can't see, a mouth, but can't talk, and legs, but can't walk? A deaf and blind paraplegic with an improperly functioning larynx.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock Knock Who's there Me Me who ME LET ME IN

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q: Why did the little girl scream? A: She didn't have a rape whistle.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What did the the Priest do to the young alter boy? Blessed Him

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call a blonde in a library? Lost

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb in WW2. None, the Nazis toke away the power and left them to die a Horrible and painful death.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

European on my shoes, buddy.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did Uncle Timmy give to Little John for his birthday? Sodomy.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

lets bomb africa

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Hitler wasn't that bad... He DID kill Hitler.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: What's worse than 6 dead babies in a trash can? A: One dead baby in 6 trash cans.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did one potato say to the other. Let's get baked!( hope u dont mind that this isnt a anti-joke well i dont know what it is so sue me)

thumb_up thumb_down +2

When life gives you gators, make Gatorade.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's Hitler's favorite drink? Jews (meaning juice)

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. It started raining and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful time. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Barack Obama, George W. Bush and Dick Cheney are in a room, what are they doing? A: Breathing

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops