How do you minimize the likelihood of theft? Take the derivative.

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jack and jill went up the hill to fetch some water , jill ended up bending over and jack ended up touching a blue waffle

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what's black and has a huge sac? A negro

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What do you call a man with a Club approaching a Seal Very Strong considering he can hold a building

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Roses are black Violets are black I lost my eyesight at two years old and all I see is black.

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Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

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Knock Knock. Who's there? UPS.

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Me: Sometimes I like to talk to myself. Me: So do I.

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How do you find the richest person in Mexico? Google it!

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asparagus

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what did Marvin Gay's father say to him before he died? "hey come listen to this 45 real quick"

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Knock knock who's threre me, I kill you

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Why was the kid late for his dentist appointment? He was abducted and he's been missing for thirteen days

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whats funnier than 24?????????????????????????????????????????? 25

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What is grey and smells like sand? A Rock.

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What did the left nut say to the right nut? Nothing

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purple pickles

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How do you get a blonde's attention? Throw deodorant at her until she looks.

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What is funnier than Miley Cirus getting a Record Album? Justin Bieber's voice.

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Why did the man go to McDonalds? Because he was a pedophile.

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Three men are travelling in a hot-air balloon, but it starts to go down over an uninhabitable desert. One of the men must sacrifice himself to save the other two by jumping overboard to reduce the weight in the balloon. Nobody is brave enough to volunteer, and they all die painful deaths.

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A man walks into a bar and says ouch, as he stubbed his foot when he became fully enclosed in the tavern.

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Brian finally kissed a girl on the lips... After her daily whore shift of blowjobs -Ap

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What did the normal guy say when he went to the Special Olympics? What a bunch of retards.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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