Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was little Alice and her family at the graveyard? Well someone had to come at her funeral...

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How do you like your eggs in the morning? -Poached or Fertilised?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q: What kind of file do you need to turn a 15mm hole into a 40mm hole? A: A pedophile.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call a group with one Jew and three Germans? Friends

thumb_up thumb_down -8

pinky ponky went a bit wonky oh no plz dont go or i will rape you untill you know

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why has Bugs Bunny got big ears? Because he's a rabbit

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How did the semen cross the road I put on the wrong sock this morning

thumb_up thumb_down +36

How do you describe a cranky rapist? Cranky and rapist

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Your mother is so fat because she inherited poor genes and dietary habits from her own parents.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Say silk 5 times. Silk Silk Silk Silk Silk Now what do cows drink? Water.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What's black and white and eats like a horse? A zebra.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

An Irishman walked into a bar, except he would call it a pub, because there are slight differences in vocabulary in different regions, 37 minutes later he walked home safely, fed his cat, read some pages of a book he had been reading, turned the light off and went to bed.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

1 + 1 = 11 Just kidding, it's 2 you moron.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

I'm a blonde... rejected from Kaplan.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A program that creates "pointless inventions" and posts them at the wrong sections.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

In Soviet Russia, the same thing that happens here, happens there.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Whats long and black? The line at KFC.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

what's the difference between a dog and a sheep? one's a dog and the other isn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

It's the police sir. There's been an accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Whats the difference between Tina Turner and dead babies? I have never fu*ked Tina Turner before.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A blonde walks into an electronics store to buy a toaster, the shopkeeper tells her that they do not serve blondes. She sues for discrimination and receives a considerable cash settlement while the shopkeeper looses his store and reluctantly works at a fast food franchise.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Chuck Norris will eventually die because he is a human being, just like all of us. His movies weren't very good either.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what did the boy in the blue hat do? wear his blue hat

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops