What did one elephant say to the other elephant? Nothing. Elephants don't talk.

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hi

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-What do you say to a woman with Two Black eyes?. -Are you really that dumb to leave the kitchen twice -Elder High School

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KNOCK! KNOCK! Who's there?! ... Ditched again!

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What's the difference between a Porche and a Pile of dead babies? I don't have a Porche in my garage.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He is seriously pissed off about being repeatedly subjected to this level of intense interrogation. Do you ask other animals why they chase their tails or claw at dirt? Do people ask you why you run when you're late? How would you like to have every move you made transformed into some cliche, old farce? There's a road, he's a chicken, there are only so many possible outcomes.

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why did the grandmom make rollerblades into cookies? because she had dementia

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What is Hitler's least favorite month? July...

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why was the little boy sad he found out he had breast cancer

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FOX News: Fair and balanced

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Why couldn't Larry walk his dog? Larry doesn't have a dog.

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What's red and smells like blue paint? red paint

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i find your gravy quite lumpy.

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Q: How do you make a fireman cry?? A: Drown his wife

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Roses are red, violets are blue God made me beautiful, how about you?

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A couple picks up a hitch-hiker with an ax on the side of the road. The hitch-hiker says "Thank you for the ride."

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What is a cow's favorite drink? Well, I could be wrong and this is just my opinion, but I do not believe that animals experience feelings and, in corollary, favoritism towards anything, particularly regarding basic survival needs, such as hydration.

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Hi there! As the Director of Anti-Joke, I would like to thank the users for their contributions so far. We are currently raising money in order to gradually end our dependence on advertisements for revenue. Your participation is so important to us, and in order to continue our service we request a minimum donation of $100 for continued use of the Anti-Joke website. Please submit your payment by the end of November 2012. All major credit cards are accepted, as is PayPal. Thank you again for your cooperation and understanding as we grow in our services.

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Why did the cow go over the hill? He didn't. He was pinned and slaughtered in a private owned animal torture facility.

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Your pathetic humanity. Deux. Dios Gud God etc. Moral: You cannot even translate the name of his very being correctly, and you expect the bible to be translated right... Laught now, because I shall silence you soon enough...

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What's worse than being a Jew in the Holocaust? Nothing.

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What's the difference between a lesbian and a Pringle ? One is a snack cracker, the other is a crack snacker.

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Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

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An Irishman walks out of a bar

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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