Why was Jimmy sad? Because he was about to be shot for attempting to assassinate the president.

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What did the picture say to the man? Don't frame me

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What do Michael Jackson and a T-Rex have in common? They're both dead.

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So there is a muslum, then he flew a plane into a building and died a sudden death. But he was wearing a helmet.

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why aren't doughnuts square? because they are round

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What's smaller then a midget? A baby midget.

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What's worse than being hit by a mini van? Being hit by 5 mini vans.

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anti joke What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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why did the irishman need plastic surgery? because after the bear attack where there used to be a face there is now a gap

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A man, a dog and a pregnant woman walked into a bar, the man bought a beer, the dog was put back outside as the pub didn't allow animals and the pregnant woman didn't buy anything alcoholic as she didn't want to risk the life of her unborn child-she had a soda.

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How do you get McFly into a Mini? McFly are a four member band and a mini has four seats so it's actually quite straightforward.

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what's the difference between a jew and a pizza? Nazis did't burn the pizza

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yaa tsi tsup ari dik ari dull an dik ari dill an dits tan dool la dippyduppy dull la roop uttyroopy la goorigan gook aya gittygangool arup cha cha adippydappydill la baritztandill lan den lan doe a barik kata barip pari baribadeebadeebadee standen lan doe ya baril las ten lan day a doe la babadeadevadevadevaduv ya vou what is that little las day lan doe badakadagadaga doo doo day a doe

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Why wouldn't Michael J. Fox make a good Sniper? Because he has no military experience.

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Why do the children cry at dinner time? Becuase there mother forces them to eat her own faeces and takes pictures of them doing it and posts it on the internet.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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Why did the child get an 100% on a test?? Because they got all the questions correct.

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What do you call a man who can't sing. Untalented and he should probably find a new profession

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what's the difference between a lion and an ostrich? they are both birds, a part from the lion

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feces

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What's a black man's favorite food? It depends.

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Why was the chair spinning Cause it wants to

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What do you do when you have 2 eggs, but only want to use 1? I don't know. I guess you could just use 1 of them and save the other for another time?

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You can pick your nose, and you can pick your friends nose. But you can't rob a bank. That's a felony.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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