How can you tell a baby lost it's voice? It doesn't scream when you staple it to a ceiling fan and turn it on.

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I was going to tell a gay joke. But that would offensive

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What did the man with sores on his tounge get for a birthday present? He recieved a very nice pair of trousers which he wore to work from time to time

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A blonde walks into a bar. She enjoys a refreshing, cold beverage with friends before returning home to sleep ahead of another day of hard work as a scientist.

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Your mom is so fat shes having trouble getting into her own pants.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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What's the best part of any family reunion? Sodomy.

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What do you can a stinky mexican? Whatevet his name may be. Possibly Jose

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Your mother is so fat she has made a concerted effort to loose weight and lead a healthier lifestyle

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Were you born on a freeway? because thats were all accidents happen.

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What happens when a chemist dies? They are given a proper funeral and buried.

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A bear and a rabbit sits by a small lake in the forest, taking a shit. After a while, the bear asks the rabbit: "Do you have problems with shit hanging from you fur after you're done?" The Rabbitm ponders, and responds: "No, bear. I really don't". Than the bear wiped his ass with some moss.

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What do you call a needle with two points? A two headed needle.

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NASCAR being considered a sport.

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A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

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Not an anti-joke, but an anti-pick-up-line: How much does a polar bear weight? Not as much as you!

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Why'd the blonde jump out the window? To kill herself

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Knock knock Whos there? D D who D's nuts!

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What do you call a person at your door? Whatever his name happens to be.

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Why cant Jesus play rugby? Cause he's nailed to a cross

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What's the best thing about sex with 24 year olds? They're in their sexual prime.

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a dude goes to vegas and loses his money, the moral of the story is not to trust the internet this story was written by The Internet

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Why did the white man kill the black man? Because he was a racist that didn't care much for black people or their ways.

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So a horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "why the long face?" It proceeds to then crap on the floor and walk out,because its a horse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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