Whats worse than 20 dead babies in a garbage can? A: The smell

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Starving.

Whats a difference between an eagle and a tree? They both can fly. Oh yeah, I Iied about the tree.

"Knock Knock" "Whos there?" "Its Adolf, we're going to camp."

Roses are red,Lemons are sour,Open your legs and give me an hour.

There are fewer coppers on sundays. As well as criminality.

Why couldn't the blonde bride make it to her own wedding? She had another unplanned circumstance occur and the wedding was postponed until next week.

Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house... Knock knock Who's there? The Chincken

How do you find the population of Mexico? Send out a census

what did the homeless person get for Cristmas? nothing.

Roses are red Violets are blue The other color on our flag is white I'm an American and rhyming doesn't matter

What did the duck say? Nothing. Everyone knows that ducks can't talk.

Have you heartd about the blond that confused winow putty for KY jelly? Her windows fell out.

Girl-Does this dress make me look fat? Boy-Hell yea you do, wait, let me speak your language...... Cows go MOOOOO -Ryan V

A man walks into a bar and says: "ouch!"

Your muma is so ugly she went to a ugly competition and got kicked out "no pros aloud".

What did the fat man say when he saw the giant twinky on the billboard? I wish that twinky was real, because I am too poor to pay my bills, am getting audited, and cannot feed my four children on minimum wage.

yo mama's so fat, yo mama's so ugly; your mothers breasts sag with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks

Why can't black people swim? Many of them can. It's racist to assume that.

Why did the man get in a car accident? Because he was blind.

Why did the blonde get fired from the m&m factory because she kept throwing away the w's

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

How many fingers am i holding up? none, my hand got blown off in Vietnam

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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