EVOLUTION OF MODERN SAYINGS 1 The Samurai: If at first you don't succeed, kill yourself. The British: If at first you don't succeed, give up The Americans: If at first you don't succeed, sue someone, then try again in hopes of a larger payout next time

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Why didn't the black man get the scholarship? Because he didn't apply for it.

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why are the Harold and Kumar movies really funny? the man who wrote obvieusly has a good sense of humor.

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Why don't midgets live in penthouses? They can't reach the button in the elevator.

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hey girl, My Gyarados is BIG enough for you to ride it ALL day and night

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? I raped your mom and she swallowed my load, k

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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What did the cat say to the cat? Miau

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What did the boy who was in a chainsaw accident yell to his mom when he was on a rollercoaster? Look ma, no hands!

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What happened to the alcoholic man that decided to never drink ever again? He died of thirst. Moral: Alcohol was the only available liquid in this twilight zone... Anti anti joke

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Why can't I believe it's not butter? Because it is butter.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave's crying because his grandmother has alltimers and now can't remember his name

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What's the difference between hot tea and cold tea? The temperature.

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Q: why did the dad drop his baby? A: she was slippery.

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how did santa ruin christmas? he didnt put presents under familys tree's

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roses are red violets are blue no seriously they are

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A potato walked into a bar and ordered a large bowl of french fries

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A man and a midget walk into a bar each carrying a suitcase. They were stopping by after work.

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How do u stop sky from being gay. You don't

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yo momma's so fat she sat on a tiny chair and relaxed.

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whats worse than the smell of nail polish? burning jews.

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Often, Asians argue that they can speak properly... Like instead of L's, they use "R's." Sure... http://eng.tekkenpedia.com/wiki/Leo#Introduction

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When life gives you lemons, you throw them at your friends. If they throw them back, duck

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Two men walk into a bar. The third man ducks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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