What did the chicken say when it crossed the road? Nothing. Chickens can't talk.

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A man walks into a bar. He then meets some friends and has a rather enjoyable night.

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How do you stop a bus? Press the brakes

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A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: I guess nobody's home. (leaves.)

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1:Nice comeback. 2: If I wanted my cum back, I would get it off your mom's face

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what do you call the breaching of the anal cavity with a penis? butt sex

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The man replies, "I was born with an extra chromosome."

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to see a bad joke look above

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A man is kidnapped shortly after being diagnosed with a new type of cancer in his left hand and is also left handed. When he is dropped off after being kidnapped it turns out a doctor hired the kidnappers to bring him a patient. The doctor notices the tumor is still in a stage where it hasn't spread to the rest of his body. The docter then claims to have a way to remove his cancer with minimal damage to the rest of him. So the doctor pulls out a laser sword and cuts off the man's left hand and says,"There, no more vancer for you!"

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whats worse than ur granny dying? uhhh...actually theres nothing is worse

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What did andy say when he went down on burger nips? Welcome to the jungle

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Why did Dave stop going to the laundromat? Because he was a suicide bomber.

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I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus, the divorce papers were filed soon thereafter.

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Yo momma is so average, she has to maintain her own facebook account...

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Why didn't Lucas want to go down the slide? He was scared.

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guys ive got a TANK under my house a septic tank

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Why do black people eat at KFC? Because KFC serves good food at reasonable prices.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Muslim? -You can research and find several similarities and differences, but I will not go into detail about them.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse doesn't reply because horses don't speak. However, he is confused and scared by the unfamiliar surroundings. Trying to escape, the horse breaks his leg. The horse must be put down.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Whos there Not Susie What did Susie get for Christmas? I don't know , she never opened it. Who high fived Susie? No one Why did Susie die? She got shot in the face

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what leaves a bigger memory than a passionate kiss? A STAB WOUND!

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How does Fred drink his milk? -computer

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Knock knock! Who's there? A Doorbell salesman.

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What does a kid with no arms and legs get for christman.... Cancer...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops