you got Lady Gaga, Taylor Swift, and Reese Witherspoon. Which do you think is more succesful

Knock-Knock who's there? Artichoke Artichoke who? Your friend Artie choked on a ham sandwich, and I'm sorry to inform you that he didn't survive.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he wants to drink. He orders a beer.

You know what it means when a priest lays his watch down on a podium? Absolutely nothing

Do you want to hear a shit joke? Stuart.

What happens when you put a white shirt in the red see on a blue moon? It gets wet.

A guy walks into a bar what does he say? OW.

What do you get when you shoot 3 cute kittens that have just walked into the house? 3 dead kittens

What worse than a hurt puppy? Two hurt puppies.

A man asks his wife to make him a sandwich, she proceeds to make a sandwich using rye bread, lettuce, two slices of tomatoes, a variety condiments, mustard and several slices of American cheese. The man eats the sandwich at a parade with his wife celebrating Woman's Rights.

Knock Knock Who's there? St. Judes St.Judes who ? St.Judes Research Hospital calling. Give me money, I've got cancer kids dying

Susie has Autism

What time did the tennis start? Tennish

roses are red, hills are green. i know you're ugly and i know I'm so mean.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has two legs

Why was the boy so tired? He had to carry his moms dead body up the stairs.

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane act

Why does Michael j. Fox make the best milkshakes? He uses the finest ingredients

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? he was epileptic

Knock Knock Whos there? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour who? Wait aren't you the one who's supposed to supposed tell the punchline? Oh Yeah

SQUID DOMINATION!!! Squids WILL Take Over the World!!!

what do you call a duck with no legs? a sitting duck

How do you know if you have athlete's foot? You ask your doctor, and he will tell you.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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