What's the number one killer in America? Death.

Why? Because!

A man walks into a bar, and orders a drink. He reaches into his back pocket, but cannot find his wallet. The man was pick pocketed by a skilled thief on his walk to the bar. The man quickly makes calls to cancel his credit cards and minimize the financial loss.

What did the leper say to the prostitute? Hello Prostitute.

how do u know when your in west virginia? when the houses have more wheels than the cars

why could the boy use the computer there was nothing wrong with him

A Jew, a Mexican, and a Black guy all walk into a bar. Bartender says: "Get the f*ck out."

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

What do you call a dog that's half poodle, half bulldog? A dog.

Why did the seal get confused when a spider tried to high five him? Because spiders have eight legs.

What sits in a corner and travels all the way around the world? A stoner on hallucinogens.

Whats green all over and travels at 100mph A christmas tree in a gokart

The cow says MOO. Until you shoot it.

What's worse than getting raped? Getting raped twice.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a pedophile.

Whats the difference between a dead baby and a chevrolet? I've never been inside a chevrolet before...

A pussy walks into a bar and orders a drink, the bar keeper asks " why are you such a pussy!" The pussy then says, "it's not my fault I'm a cat!" before getting run over

Six million.

A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He was ferociously raped by a bear.

What abou three times

what do lions and potatoes have in common? They each drive a sports car, wait neither the lion nor the potato drive a sports car. Sorry to waste your time with this joke that seemed to not really have a meaning or a clever punchline.

Why couldn't the plane fly? The pilot was a muffin.

What looks like a jew, smells like a jew, but claims he isn't jewish? Fletcher Phillips

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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