Why did the fat lady poop on my knee? Because i'm thirsty.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Q:Why did Santa, the tooth fairy, and a rich man jump out of a plane? A: On Christmas Eve, a rich man was skydiving and lost his tooth as he plummeted towards the beautiful plateau.

What did the docter say to its patient? What?? Im sorry sir you have aids

Why did the chicken get taken into the kitchen? If u dont get this you need to go b ack to school

a man walked into a bar "ouch"

How come Hellen keller is blind and deaf? Cause she is a women.

That Awkward moment when your whole family dies

Why did Silly Billy throw a clock out the window? Because he was stupid.

I need somebody to lean on... ...Because one of my legs was amputated after I was blown up on a mine field in afganistan.

why did the stupid blonde run straight into oncoming traffic? because there was a small child there that could have been seriously injured.

A Horse walks into a bar and the barman says 'What with the long face?' and the horse replys 'i'm a f*cking horse.'

Knock Knock. Who's there? Child Protection Services. ...............

Q. What is a brown cow called? A. A cow.

yo mamas so fat... she's a map on call of duty

What did the poor sickly orphan get for Christmas? Nothing.

Whats worse then 10 black men hanging from trees? Kittens

Chayton

Me Neither.

There was was 14 apples in a tree. And that's it.

What do you call a blond british girl a blond britishngirl

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Waking up with a snapping turtle up your butt.

What do you do when a girl you gave roofies to wakes up? Take your tongue out of her ass and run!

The club cant even handle me right now Because theyve reached their limit of people allowed in

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...