Q: Whats the difference between porno and your mom? A: I can masturbate to porno

ok so ive been pondering for a while now for a joke to submit and here is what ive got, tell me what you think: quif stain

Johnny Manziel is the best quarter ever (this isn't a joke just a true statement)

i'm not gay

Whats worse than the Holocaust? - Getting killed in the Holocaust. Whats worse than that? - Nothing.

A man walks into a bar in the morning. He is the bartender, and he works there.

How do gay guys have sex with women?? They dont, they are gay.

what did the chinese man say to the other asian? he said ??????

What do blacks and the night have in common? Their both worse than when it's light

What is the saddest color? Red because his family recently was killed

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

How do you prevent a drowning..? A: You don't throw the black man in the portwater

Whats worse than 1 bee sting? - 2 Whats worse than 2 bee stings? - Holocaust Whats worse than the Holocaust? - 3 bee stings Now, if you are smart, you would notice that no one really alive today was in the Holocaust, therefore you can not make an accurate comparison between bee stings and the millions of Jews being killed. -SPG

Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms. Why doesnt she have arms? they got bit off by a shark. Knock knock. Who's there? Not the girl.

what do you get when you cross a dinosaur and a spaceship? a dinosaur spaceship

"knock knock" "whos there?" there was no response from the other side but the knocking continued, the homeowner felt distressed so phoned the police...

How can you tell the difference between Brooke Colbert or any other girl Jesse has been with? It's easy, Brooke the only one Jesses ever been with. They even share the same bra size.

Why did little tommy fall in the well. Because he grew tired of his life of brutal Beatings and starvation, so he jumped.

a potato a chicken and a rooster ate a cat and you just wasted your time

what happened when a chicken laid an egg? it died

Why couldn't the cat eat it's food? It's face was stapled to the floor.

Why did the girl fall off her bike? Someone threw a piano at her.

What's red, loose, and easy to wear? A rock. I lie about everything.

A man walks into a bar, and promptly leaves because he left his kid in the car.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...