What did the P.E. coach say to the fat kid? you need to exercise

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Why couldn't the drunken man walk in a straight line? Because someone shot him in the face.

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what did the cop say to the robber... freeze bitch hope you like prison food and penis

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Why did the blond fall of the ladder? She had no arms.

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Yo momma is so fat, when she wears a bathing suit, people are like, wow, that woman is fat.

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what's the difference between a jew and a bar of soap? You don't rub your nuts with a jew.

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whats long ,hard and full of sea men ? a sumureen

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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Q. Why did the boy throw up on the bus? A. All his friends around him died in the accident

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms or legs. Knock Knock? Who's There? Not Suzy. What did Suzy want for Christmas? Parents who loved her. What did Suzy get for Christmas? Cancer.

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When life gives you a hamburger, you know you're at Mr. Life's Hamburger Stand on 8th Avenue.

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How do you have sex with an amputee? stick it in the eyes

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What starts with a J, and burned in the oven? My Jumbalaya, i left it in for too long...

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Do the roar!

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What did Jennifer get in her college exam? She got a C minus

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How do you make a teacher cry? Shit in their water bottle.

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A: Knock Knock B: (No Reply) Nobody is home and the man trying to get in will come back later and try again.

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Jolly Rancher the particle beam is in the alpha quadrant and we are good to go.Please confirm receipt of this communique. Cell Leader Iqbal

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Why do elephants paint there feet yellow? so they can hide in mustard bottles. Have you ever seen an elephant in a mustard bottle? exactly

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Why did the little girl fall off of her bike? Because she didn’t have any arms. like your mom

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What's the worst thing to find in an empty box? Nothing,It's empty

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your mom is so black that it can be assumed she is of african descent

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had sinned.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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