Two eggs are in a frying pan. One egg says to the other, "Gee, it's getting hot in here!" The other one says, "Shit, a talking egg!!"

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What do you get when you mix a bulldog with a shih-tzu? Dogs are large and solid objects and therefore cannot be mixed together.

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WEED!

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Whats the worst part of your school burning down? A: The burnt pizza.

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95556

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two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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If you share rice between 30 Africans what do they each have? Aids.

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roses are red violets are blue i'm a schizophrenic and so am i

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it all began in 1807 when a 7 foot rooster gave birth to a chicken on the sidewalk while purchasing ice cream. Scientists have been intrigued so they went into study with it and won the Nobel prize. This somehow persuaded them to lure the chicken over to the other side by using a lollipop. They threw the lollipop as the chicken crossed the road, hit it in the eye, the chicken spazzed out, jumped in front of a car, teleported to London, and is now a gynecologist.

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why did the blonde put on a coat? because she was cold.

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What do you call a Mexican in the sand? A churro! (not trying to be racist, I'm even Mexican)

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There was a little boy and a little girl in a bathtub having a bath. Suddenly the little girl looked down at the boy. "Can I touch it?" "No way -- you already broke yours off!"

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Q: why did the prisoner drop his soap? A: easy sex

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? I dont know lets go play on our bikes.

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A dog walked into the forest and saw a whale in a puddle

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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why didn't the black kid make the basketball team? He has cancer.

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Whats the difference between a truck full of babies and a truck full of bowling balls? You can't unload a truck full of bowling balls with a pitchfork.

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(Knock knock) A:who is it? B:its the police open up where coming in B:I SAID OPEN THE BLOODY DOOR A:(SHIT)

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What's worse than the Holocaust? • • • Stubbing your toe.

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A blind man crosses the street... he is hit by a car

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Knock Knock. Who`s there? The police, your family were killed in a bakery A German bakery.

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-Why did the jewish man chase after the penny? -Because he's poor and needs to feed his starving family.

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Obama.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops