A black guy and a white guy jump out of a tree, who hits the ground first? They both hit at the same time while sustaining minor injuries.

What's black and white and red all over? A dead penguin

Why did Hitler shoot himself? Because he found out Chuck Norris was a Jew.

All work and no play makes Johnny successful in his field of interest.

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

Lady Gaga didn't have anything to wear to the playboy party.

you were so loud you woke helen keller up!!!!!!!

Roses are gray Vilots are gray im a dog

What do you call it when the Doctor goes back in time to meet himself? A pair o' Docs. What do you call it when Shaquille O'Neil goes back in time to meet himself? Shaquille O'Neil can't go back in time.

what did old retarded autistic ginger kid get for his birthday? i dont know thats why i asked

What's blue and can't read? The Pacific Ocean

What's worse than eating brussel sprouts? Getting raped by a brussel sprout.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Holy guacamole Pineapples

what's white and long and hairy? -Dean when hes on his period

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Neither have they.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cock in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

How many dead babies can u fit in a bath tub 17

Why is cheese yellow? Answer: I don't know, I was hoping that you would know.

A woman walks in a confessional booth and proceeds to tell the priest about how she killed and ate her baby in a fit of hysteria because she is having issues dealing with her fresh divorce. The priest does not call 911.

A grasshopper goes into a bar It is stepped on and crushed.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have a dick just for you

Q. What's long and hard and full of seamen? A. A penis. Oops, I misspelled "semen". Sorry. Also, to clarify, this doesn't describe the normal state of the average penis. Usually they are flaccid, and they can only be said to be "full of semen" at the exact moment of ejaculation.

roses are violets red is blue i like doughnuts doughnuts are good

what happens when a retard hits an iceberg with a gigantic boat? 1517 people die.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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