What did the black man do in the Italian Pub? He gave a 20% tip and couldn't have been more courteous.

Roses are red Violets are actually purple You should probably see an eye doctor.

Why did they save the man in a burning building? To arrest him for arson.

What happened to the boy who tried to cross the road? He got hit by a semi-truck and died.

Other Guy: What are you looking at? Me: You.

what did the dog eat for dinner? food.

Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was blind.

What did the man say to the woman? get back in the kitchen and make me a sandwich.

Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

Why is there no aspirin in the jungle? Because aspirin is a man-made drug derived from salicylic acid, and it it is this that is extracted from willow bark, which used to be used by Cherokee Americans as a fever-reducer and pain-reliever.

Have you ever just woken up one day and thought, "I don't wanna wear pants today."

What happens when an Asian with a boner walks into a wall? He breaks his nose

Want to hear a joke? 12 year olds

Why didn't Rebecca Black take the bus? Because she would have had a heart attack with all of the seat choices.

How did the woman get pregnant? She was thrown into a pool filled with semen.

-I thought the lesson had started? -It has

What do a bike and a human have in common they are both objects

Why did the boy sharpen his pencil it was dull

what did the chicken say to the other chicken? nothing, they dont talk.

Your mother is so poor she doesn't have any money!

Chantelle, I loved you, but you cheated with Johnathan from Church...

Q )Why did the black man shoot the white man? A )The black man had been walking home from his weekly gospel service at the local church when suddenly the criminal had stopped him in his tracks. In a desperate attempt to save himself he seized the gun from the white man and shot him in the leg in order to defend himself. He survived.

what is the difference betweeb 69 and 77? 8

Why didn't the 9-year-old girl go to school on monday? Because she lived in a country where women don't have rights and was traded as a commodity for 2 pigs to be a wife for a 43 year old man.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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