What did one jobless cancer cell say to the other? Lets go get Jobs.

A British man walks into a dentist's office.

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he has no sense of living and no muscles to move.

Why was the legless man out of his wheelchair? He fell down some stairs.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? He said, "Where's my tractor?"

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Leaves are green, You should know all this by now...

Why did Sally fall off the swing? I hit her with a shovel.

patient: Doctor, It hurts when I go like this. doctor: Don't do that.

Yo mommas so dumb she took an IQ test and scored low on it

Your mother is so morbidly obese that she greatly exceeds the necessary recommended serving sizes of each meal.

How do you a baby into a small bowl? Put it in the blender. How to u get it out? Tostitos.

why was six afraid of seven? it's a long story, and six doesn't want to talk about it.

What makes a catholic priest happier then a visit to the penn state locker room? Introducing Jesus to people and them accepting him as their savior.

Why couldn't the blond get into the library? Because the library was closed therefore the door was locked.

What did the French-Italian couple name their child? Angelo Pierre Smith, giving tribute to the father's uncle Angelo, and the mother's great-grandfather, Pierre.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

A. Your mamma is so stuiped she starved to death in a grocary store.

Why was the black guy hanging from the tree? Because he committed suicide because his wife of 20 years left him, is only child hates him and due to the bad economy is job at wall street was terminated.

whats helen kellers favorite activity fingering herself

When Chuck Norris dives into a pool... he gets wet due to the aqueous nature of the water

What did the midget get for Christmas? A new watch and a gift card for Applebee's.

Q. What does a blonde and beer bottles have in common? A. Nothing. Blonde is a hair color and beer bottles are inanimate objects used to contain various brands of beer.

What's so great about twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

What is funnier than 24? If you think numbers are funny then you could have a mental illness and that isn't quite funny.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...