How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? 1

whats worse then justin beiber NOTHING

I may have Alzheimer's. But at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

A guy went to a haunted house on Friday the thirteenth… it gave him a small fright and he continued on with his day

Why didn't the baby cry? It was stillborn.

Which side of a chicken has more feathers? The outside.

Dislike if you shag sheep ;)

I saw a woman get donkey punched in the middle of the street. Nero the clit collector: You know... What is it called when A donkey kinda lifts its front hoove and hits a woman? ...WHAT? DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE STARVE TO DEATH BECAUSE OF YOUR COIN COLLECTION? YOUR STAMPS ARE MURDER! (or something) At least my uh... "Friends" survive... SOMETIIIIIIIIMEEEEEEEEES!!!!!!! ...And then I kill them.

Q)whats pink and fluffy A)pink fluff

What do homosexual men do during sex? I don't know, but if you want to, I suggest you ask one of them.

Q: What does a blond do with a box of crayons? A: Paints a picture

Why did the monkey fall from the tree? It was dead.

What has nine arms and sucks? An appendage-rich octopus with an inhaling habit.

How do you know if your friend is dead? You shoot him in the face!

name-Sally-Sue What I am good at in school: readin' annnd...math. What I need to work on in school: spelin

What's gold and looks like a brick? A gold brick. What's gold and looks like a nugget? A gold nugget. Whats gold and like a car? Gold. I lied about the car.

Is it a sin to love math? Cos I don't. I'm radical about it.

What did one ocean say to the other ocean, nothing it just waved

Once upon a time there was a very lonely man. He was kind, strong, handsome, smart, and basically everything that was good and that a girl wanted. Well, one day, through all his immense loneliness, he decided that it was time that he got into a relationship. Knowing that he deserved a competent and pure woman, he went to a local church to search for his perfect match. That night, he took home with him the most beautiful and purest of all the women in the church, brought her to his room, and whipped out his junk on her face.

Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I dont have a Ferrari in my garage.

How do you get 100 Jews into a car? ...Nevermind, it wouldn't work.

What did the cancer patient say to the arab? the tumors hurt my body

What do a blond and a jar of marmalade have in common? Nothing, they are completely different.

why wouldn't the printer print? because it had no ink.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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