what do you call and man that has a twitch every time someone say tissue broken arm, leg, hand, collar bone and there iphone? A mentally and physically demented man that needs serious help from a psychotherapist otherwise matter would get increasingly worse

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Two cannibals were eating a clown. Good.

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What do you call a moose with a 12 gauge shotgun bullet through it's head? Open Season

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A man, a dog and a pregnant woman walked into a bar, the man bought a beer, the dog was put back outside as the pub didn't allow animals and the pregnant woman didn't buy anything alcoholic as she didn't want to risk the life of her unborn child-she had a soda.

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Why did the penguin die? due to an increase in the quantity of greenhouse gases that are being released into the atmosphere, global warming is on the rise. So the penguin died because his home melted.

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Michal j. fox has Parkinsons disease. He is tired of losing at jenga

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yo mama so fat, she weighs 478 pounds and is in high risk of cardiovascular dieses and/or heart failure.

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What was the weather like at the rap concert?there was a lil wayne.I DID A FUNNY! !!

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A man comes home from work and find his wife in bed with another man. They realize that they have grown apart over the past few years, and start attending therapy in an ultimately unsuccessful attempt to reconnect with each other.

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what do you do if a blonde throws you a grenade. scream. run. hide

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What do you call a dirty black person? Unhygienic

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Why are black people so good at basketball? They practice.

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Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber where walking in New York . They both get ice cream... then bieber gets hit by a bus.

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Why did the tornado cross the road? Because it's a tornado, that's what tornadoes do.

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knock knock Who's there? Someone who wants to save you from the shitty dinner your lazy wife made.

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What do fish and shoe laces have in common? nothing.

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How do you make a kids fall off a swing? Throw an axe at them

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What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac over off a cliff? A Cadillac seats 5

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Hey look i just made a jo... shit.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Getting your balls chopped off by a maniac on LSD.

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What happens when you give a Jew an iPhone? He says thank you and gives you a hug.

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What do Austrailian cows say? Moo.

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A man walked into a bar. He was meeting his friends but was 30 minutes early so he went down the road to buy some food. He had recently began dieting after watching a series of lifestyle programs which informed him of the potential risks involved with high cholesterol and blood pressure levels. He purchased a garden salad and a freshly squeezed orange juice, and made it back to the bar in time to meet his friends.

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what long hard and in a tight hole? a penis in a vagina

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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