Knock Knock! Come in.

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There was a goat and it was eating McDonalds, I just farted and my nuts are itchy.

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What does a muslim do on a plane? Flies to his intended destination without causing a problem.

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Ammy Winehouse walks into a bar Don't you said we should stop jocking about dead people ?

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Land Rovers

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Once upon a time there was a nice old man who loved to ride his bike... He unfortunately died when he had a heart attack.

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Q.A zebra somehow managed to get out of the zoo and started running all around the town. After some time he saw a zebra crossing(not an original zebra crossing the road but the black and white stripes)on the road.He stoppped suddenly.WHY? A. He was too tired to run any more!!!

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What happens when you run out of butter You ask antonio

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why did the family get sick?? because i fucked a girl with a parsnip then sold the parsnip to a family with 4 small children

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How did little Timmy die? He was ripped to shreds by a violent badger.

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Why did an old man cause a car accident? He gotf a heart attack.

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What did the farmer say when his cow got stuck in a tree? - "Get down"

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How do you make an idiot laugh? Tell him a mildly funny joke relating to bodily functions, such as defecating or passing gas.

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No, but I am not just an author, the important thing is, that this kid has been stopped as we speak, as I said he was selling information to several clients on the deep web, and patterns do reveal that he was selling you out piece by piece while prepared to make a run for it once he delivered the vital details. Say, did you promote this guy a bit too fast or something? Either he knows as much as you do, or otherwise he has been learning the ins and outs of your little place pretty fast.

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There were three elephants in a bathtub. One said, "Pass me the soap." The other one said, "What do you think I am? A Radio???"

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Why does Charlie Sheen do cocaine? Because his father was a poor role model and he's an unstable celebrity.

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What's the difference between a duck? both of it's legs are the same.

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Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

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Why did the black guy cross the road? i have no idea but i hope he got to the other side safely.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It would be unlikely for any entity of this time to speak English and communicate with chickens so it is improbable for one to know the answer.

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong walked on the moon, and Michael Jackson is dead....

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Person: kk Person1: did you just kk me? Person: no

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Roses are red bullets are led if you don't take me back now i'll shoot you in the head!

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where do you find a dog with no legs? Korea. It's customary for the guests to get the drumsticks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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