Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his mother at the hospital who is dying of cancer.

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What do a mole and an eagle have in common? They both can fly except for the mole

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Q: Wanna hear a joke? A: Women's rights.

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The scientists of Cambridge have finally developed a cure for feeling low! They have presented it in the style of a song. See if you can spot the hidden frequency wavelengths when you sing it out lout. They are what make you feel better. You've got to LOVE the world! Be a friend! And when You're down you've got to get up again! And when your blue, here's what you do. Just sing this happy tune! However if that fails, then you should consider getting professional help.

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How did Debbie get a black eye? Because her dad asked her to take off her pants and she refused so he beat her

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Sigh, visit me with a pack of condoms, that is so romantic... Now you tell me something, how old are you REALLY and what is your real name? Oh yeah, my first name is Tifa (I know you hate it for some reason), and I am turning 24 in 30 days.

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Q: What is the most common question among children? A: How are babies made?

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Why did the robot cross the road? Because It was bionically fused to the chicken.

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what do you get when you combine sodium and hydroxide? sodium-hydroxide

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An irish man walks out of a bar

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How many police officers does it take to secure 3 hooded black men? However many police are on duty.

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How many people does it take to change a lightbulb? It depends on if the person has a lightbulb of the correct size and wattage...

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How many mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? Juan.

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What is worse than being lost in the supermarket? Being lost in space.

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person 1: hey! guess what? person 2: what? person 1: i once saw a brown polar bear

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

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Your momma is so hot your dad married her. She then slept around with other men. Your dad found out and now they're divorced.

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Why didn't the chicken not get across the road? Cause it's head got shot off by some drunk asshole

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A horse walks into the bar and says "why the long face?" The bartender replies "hey! I was supposed to say that!"

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"CHOCOLATE!!!!!!!!" -Spongebob

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't. Her head was stuck in the oven.

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Q. What's worst than getting kicked in the balls ? A. The holacaust

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What's black and blue and hates sex? The unfortunate child in a pedophile's basement who the police have yet to find.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Incorrect. Violets are violet. DERP!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops