Q:What did a young Arnold Schwarzenegger say when his friends wanted to play a game pretending to be 18th century composers? A: "I'll be Mozart!"

If your falling up a ladder and your canoe runs out of gas, how many pancakes does it take to cover a dog houes? A. George Washington B. India C. Blue Answer: False

Wanna hear a joke? 9-11

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game.

What do men and women have in common? no really what do they have in common

Why did the pedophile cross the road? To molest a child.

What happen when a plane crash? Everyone on it died...

What do you call a man with no arms and legs, lying outside of your house? An ambulance, he's clearly in trouble.

What do you call a Mexican named Chicee? Chicee

What do you say to a friend when they're feeling down? The Game

Your momma is so fat that she's developed a cardiovascular disease and has 5 weeks to live

A mormon walks into a bar. The Bartender says "What can I get you" The Mormon says "Sparkling Water please. In my religion we don't drink alcohol."

How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? You wouldn't be able to count them if it were dark.

what's black and has a huge sac? A negro

Your mom is such a slut that your dad didn't even ask her if you were his biological child and raised you as if you were, regardless of what the dna results may suggest.

What did the policeman say to the man accused of murder? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

Your mom is so fat that she is fat.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a nest of worms in your apple.

neil likes pube toast

where did napolean keep his armies? In his sleevies!

Why did the boy fail his final? His severe depression and progressive detachment from reality caused him to hang himself the night before

A few black men walk into a bank... They all open seperate savings accounts and add a portion of that week's pay to put forward money to pay for their children's college education.

What's worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings. What's worse than 2 bee stings? The Hollocaust. What's worse than the Hollocaust? 3 bee stings.

My mom so fat, when she jumps gravity pushed her away from the ground

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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