Boy it's sure cold out today. Die

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can? The grief the family feels at the loss of their firstborn child.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

A semi-coherent black man was wandering down the street toward an open garbage receptacle. Immediately an angry, filthy raccoon jumped up, hissing and baring its fangs, as if to defend its territory against the startled negro. This happened four times in a row. Each time it was either a negro, a mexican, a crippled kid or a person of jewish ancestry. Each time the raccoon hissed viciously. Coincidence? No. The raccoon was obviously very hungry and attempting to defend its last remaining refuge of territory from the ever-increasing encroachment of man's filth into the formerly natural and pristine spaces where wildlife once lived. He is now reduced to hissing at the ethnics and the cripples, just to eek out a pitiful subsistence on trash.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Man walks in the bar then buys a drink

thumb_up thumb_down +7

While I was having sex... Just kidding, I can't get laid.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why was the man called Big Larry? His name was Larry and he was morbidly obese.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why do all black people look the same? They don't you're just racist.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

what is the only death better than asama bin ladin JUSTIN BIEBER'S

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody, because first, pineapples are too small to fit in, and second, you would drown.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

My mother got hammered last night. We cried at her funeral.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do gay horses eat?........ Cheese

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Q.What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, no head, and no blood in his body? A.Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why should you never shower with a pokemon? Pokemon is a game for children. In doing so you would greatly disturb your child who is quite fond of pokemon

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q: What kind of time is it when you fall from a ladder and are moments from landing straight on a operational circle saw? Moral: ITS TIME TO SPLIT!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did Sally fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down -42

How do you kill Osama Bin Laden? Get The Navy Seals To Infiltrate his compound.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why Russians ride bears? Because god hate bears

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Here's a joke The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you call two gay guys? People who should be living in California.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refridgerator

thumb_up thumb_down +5

I rode in to town on an ass... ur momas ass!!

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A blind man, a black man and a rabbi walk into a bar. The blind man trips and falls violently.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the chicken cross the road? The road was Catholic, and it couldn't cross itself.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops