Why do the Chinese eat cats? Because it is a good source of protein that is relatively easy to obtain. Really, it's not much different than killing pigs for food.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the koala fall off the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the dog say to its owner? well as you can see it is physically impossible for a dog to speak english or any other langueges such as french, spanish or chinese.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting ran over by a truck.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

How do you make Justin Bieber cry? You take away his marijuana.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

whats long hard and full of seamen? a submarine.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Girl: I wrote a poem. Boy: Let's hear it! Girl: I like you, thats a start. You don't, so we are growing apart. In my heart there's a little tear, its funny to see how much you care. I hate the way you played my heart. You never finish what you start. Boy: Cool. Whose is for? Girl: You... Boy: Wow ummm, I have to go to......................yeah bye.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Mother Mary held her daughter 20 minutes under water. Not to save her from her troubles, just to see the funny bubbles

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the lawyer name his daughter. he couldnt because both the baby and his wife died in child birth.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Ask me if I'm a horse. Are you a horse? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the man cross the street? Because he had to go work.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the black man shoot someone? His wife recently left him and he got fired from his job.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

roses are red violets are blue i'll be back in an hour or two

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A priest, a minister, and a rabbi all walk into a bar and ask the bartender for a drink, but in response the bartender politely points out that there are probably people in need of their assistance at their respective place of warship.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

roses aren't red, violets aren't blue, they're all black, cause i'm colorblind. what about you?

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call a black man in a Police car? A Police Officer

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Every day thousands of pets and animals are beaten, neglected and abused.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Whats the difference between dinosaurs and skittles? Dinosaurs were killed out hundreds of thousands of years ago when skittles on the other hand are sugery candy that people eat when they are craving a sweet treat

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A Blonde, a Brunette, and a Red head walk into a bar They are friends from school and have not seen each other in 15 years; they are hoping to have a good night out

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why did the boy spill his lemonade? He was attacked by ravage dogs.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

why was the black mans shirt ripped? because he escaped genocide in africa

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Knock Knock Who's there? Reality, we have come to install a doorbell.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Can you help jack Off. The elephant?

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops