Your momma's so fat: She regrets not making the most of her youth whilst she was still attractive.

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What disease did the gay man get from his partner? Streptococcus!

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How do you kill a domb blond? Shoot her in the head.

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What did the black man do when he found a bucket full of KFC chicken on the ground? He promptly looked around for anyone who might have bought it. After searching around, with no takers, he ate some of the chicken and saved the rest. He brought it back to his apartment and left it in his fridge, so he may later eat it as leftovers.

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What did the virgin say to the car salesmen? Hello, I'm really interested in buying a car today.

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There is no I in team... But there is a u in suck. There is no I in team, but there is in awesome

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Jerry: Hey, do you smell that? It kinda smells like updog. Moe: What's updog?

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What happend to the dude who couldnt fart He blew up

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Me: do u you want to here a joke You: ya Me: Woman's rights

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ok... let me think of something good! Write Your Own It's easy to take part, just type your text below! ok... let me think of something good! Write Your Own It's easy to take part, just type your text below! ok lets... wait.. wtf I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Well it all started when 7 did something horrible to 8 and 9. Always being used for various things and never getting credit, 7 finally snapped one day at the office. He went home for lunch, which was uncharacteristic for him. He came back with a large duffle bag and a trench coat on. He walked into the the middle of the office and opened the bag and trench coat. The events that followed are now known as the office slaughtering of 1992. 7 ended up gutting 8 alive and eating its intestines. 9 was forced to watch then inch by inch was cut up. His heart was ripped out and shown to him before he died. The body was then thrown into acid, and 7 hung himself with piano wire, but lived. 7 also has herpes and 6 doesnt want anything to do with that shit.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, who had his car stolen and wasn't very happy so called the police.

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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Johnny Manziel is the best quarter ever (this isn't a joke just a true statement)

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whats worse than stubbing your toe? getting a vanarial disease and going insane

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Why did the black man get some Kool-Aid? Because he was thirsty, and thought Kool-Aid would be able to quench his thirst.

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Sex. That is all.

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Why didn't the blonde go to the party? Her depression finally got the best of her and she shot herself

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What did the bank clerk say to the robber when he demanded all the money in the drawer? "Okay."

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Why is there so much hate in the world? Because you touch yourself at night.

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Women's rights

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Q: Why was the child sad? A: because a doctor was taking bullet fragments out of his chest.

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Rozes r read Vilets r blew iy cahn noht spell becuase i am blind.

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what was the first thing Barack Obama said to the people of america? ... hi

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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