What's worse than a needle in a hay stack? A needle in a stack of drug addicts.

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Why did the man cross the road? His mother had recently passed away after a 12 year battle with lung cancer and is visiting her tombstone.

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What do you call a dead man in a ditch? Phil.

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What did the pony say when it lost its voice? Nothing. Ponies are incapable of speech.

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What do you do when your dish washer breaks? divorce her.

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Q: Why can't Carl drive? A: Carl is a stone

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

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Why do you not play poker with a cheetah. 1. Animals can't play card games. 2. Cheetahs are carnivores. Think about it.

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Why do dead Republicans float? Their corpse's mass-to-volume ratio is less than the water they displace. It is very sad.

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When life gives you lemons......you should be really scared because life shouldnt be giving you anything....espically lemons so if life offers you lemons you better run

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a mexican guy and a black guy are in a car, who is driving? the mexican, the black guy is in the passenger seat

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-On a scale of one to ten, what's your favourite colour of the alphabet? -The answer is yes, because aliens don't wear hats.

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Why did the boy take the train to school? Because he lived quite far away.

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How do you make a baby stop screaming? Pour acid down its throat.

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Racial Equality.

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Whats the difference between a Philadelphia Flyers fan and a pedophile? What they are.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree He was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree It was staples to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree Peer pressure

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why did the chicken cross the road because on the other side his wife that he had loved for years was being tortured and he was trying to save her life.

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whats long and stretchy? elastic

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what do you call a cow with no legs? ground BEEF!!!!

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Whats the difference between babies and basketballs? You cant unload a truck of basketballs with a pitchfork.

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We got him in about five minutes, the kid will already be exhausted by the point we get to him, r rather, he gets to us. Pretty quick for a small geek I got to say, the photography we got of him is an obvious Photoshop, but he seems similar enough I guess. I would call, but it seems someone has been messing with all other "Erron`s" homes and phones if I had not dropped mine, I would not have noticed we have been bugged for a while, pretty professional gear too,

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Two women are sitting quietly in a corner, minding their own business.

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What's worse than getting dumped? Heart Failure.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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