Why was the baby crying? He saw a nigga

What's the difference between a convertible and a dead baby? One's in my garage, and one's a car.

How many ears does Captain Kirk have? Two.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to

did you see stevie wonder's new guitar no neither did he

Mr Mac reminds me that no matter how hard you try you will always lose your hair

Your moms so poor that when she went to buy a bag of chips, she couldn't buy the bag of chips, because she didn't have enough money to buy the bag of chips

What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

How did the guy in a wheelchair get up 7 flights of stairs? He didn't.

Whats worse than finding an worm in your apple? 1942 BERLIN

Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? Cause it was stapled to the cat.

What do you call a school bus full of white kids? A school bus.

Whats funny about a guinea pig water skiing? The part where he explodes.

Roses are red Violets are blue Btw I have aids And now you too

whats black and doesnt like politics? a black chair

What do you call Justin Beiber having sex with a woman? Gay

what do you call an icy road? dangerous.

A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

Is this the Krusty Krab? No, the Krusty Krab is a fictional place, and therefore does not exist.

why did the chicken cross the road? because he was peckish.

Look down at your keyboard. Notice that U and I are together? <3 Also notice that J and K are together too!:P

^ That's not even funny ^

Q. What did the man with no heart say? A. Nothing. No living creature can live without a heart.

A kangaroo walks into a bar, he hops up to the bartender, and asks for a martini. The bartender, not knowing exactly what to do, goes into the back to his boss's office. He says "Hey, there's a kangaroo up front askin' for a martini...do we serve kangaroos?" His boss replies "Ya, of course, but these kangaroos, they aren't too smart, so charge him like 50 bucks for the drink." The bartender agrees and goes back up front to serve the kangaroo. He pours the martini and hands it to the kangaroo, the kangaroo thanks him and says "How much do I owe you?" The bartender replies "50 bucks." The kangaroo then reaches into his pouch, pulls out a fifty dollar bill, and puts it on the counter. He finishes his drink and begins to hop away. As he is leaving, the bartender says "Hey, wait, we don't get many of your kind around here, why is that?" And the kangaroo replies "I'm not surprised at THESE prices!!!" and hops out.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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