Knock Knock Who's there? I am I am who? I am here to see you

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Every 60 seconds in Africa, a Minute passes.

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Why are babies like shake weights? Cause If you shake them long enough, they both end up being inanimate objects.

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What was in the magical purple teapot? Two dying pelicans.

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My wife and I have been married for ten years. She is a great care-taker and I couldn't be more happy. Then she asked me to make her a sandwich, I went to the kitchen and into the knife drawer...well I think you can guess what happened after that. I cut the meats, and I made her a sandwich.

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Why did the man throw the clock out the window? The man's loving family had recently been murdered, and the clock was a constant reminder of their mortality, as it had served as the center of those horrific events.

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"did you hear about the midget's self-murder?" "No, what happend?" "He jumped off the curb"

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Why did LeBron James up and bail on Cleveland? He thought there was a greater opportunity for postseason success by playing in Miami.

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What happens when you Shoot a guy with a red Shirt On? He Dies.

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A Jew walks into a bar. He sits down for about half an hour, enjoys some drinks and calls a taxi to take him home.

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What do you say on a date with Uma Thurman? Hey Uma, pass the salt.

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what has balls and is long and suckible? Spaghetti

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Why did the fly get off the toilet? It got pissed off.

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How did the dog die? It was wet because of the rain so the little boy put him in the microwave for 30 minutes to warm him up

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- Wanna see a magic trick? - Sure - Too bad. I don't know any.

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A blonde fails an exam because she did not study

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Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree? No

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How did the black guy get knocked out? He was hit by a fridge.

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69.... is a number

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a

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Hi

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The Definition of Megan Bates 800 Hamburgers

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Q: What do you call a Muslim controlling a plane? A: A pilot.

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What did the blind man say to the mentally challenged man when he bumped into him? Watch where you're going, retard.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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