Did you hear about the guy who came onto his best friend's wife? Yeah, she handed him some kleenex after and told him to wipe it off.

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What did the penguin wearing a blue sweater say to the sink? I am a penguin wearing a blue sweater.

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A black man and a white woman walk into a bar and celebrate their interracial marriage anniversary over a couple of drinks and then call a cab to avoid driving while intoxicated

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

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A women was driving along in her brand new, swanky, red ferrari when she spotted a red light in the distance. She stopped steadily, following the rules of the road. All of a sudden a loud bang came from behind her where a young driver had hit her at 50 mph. They both come to an abrupt stop and exited their vehicles. The women says "Idiot, you just hit me!" The boys says "oh don't worry, I have insurance."

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HAHAHAHAHAHA.....shut up your joke isn't better.

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yo mamas so ugly she is often made fun of andridiculed about her appearance.

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Roses are flowers.

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Miscarriages.

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What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? El-if-iknow

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

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Why did the man have a curiously-shaped scar on his cheek? He had been mauled by an owl as a child.

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If a tree fell in the forest, and no one was around to hear it, would you like a cupcake?

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Why did the hipster hate black people? Because he was racist.

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What's brown and sticky? A lump of shit.

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Anonymous. Anonymous who? Exactly.

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What did dean carmon say to his brother? - I don't know I'm not his brother

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Roses are red Violets are blue The sky is also blue

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Where did Susie go after the bombing? Everywhere

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Knock knock. Who's there? 9/11. And you said you'd never forget.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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A old man walks into a hospital He doesn't come back out

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what do u do if a women serves you lunch in the living room? u tighten the chain!!!!!!

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Q. What is small, ugly and severely asthmatic? A. My younger brother. Jimmy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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