Your mom is so fat, she is having angioplasty. She might need a ride a home.

Why did your mom fall off the swing? I shot him.

In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

KANE AUDITIONS FOR BRITAINS GOT TALENT SIMON COWEL REAPES HIM

Me: "If I had Alzheimers, I would break down into tears." Friend: "Why, you would forget why you were crying..." Me: "Who are you again?"

A kid walks into a ctholic school and asks about the therory of evolution.

Why was the math book crying? Three men just brutally raped his wife.

What is furry, red, and flat? Road kill.

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

What's worst than finding a worm in your apple Finding half a worm in your apple .....

A cow walks into a bar and says, "moo."

What do you call Batman and Robin after they have been run over by a car? Dead.

Your mums so tall, she's above the average height of women for her age.

Why did the hippo drink the water? Because it was thirsty

outside your comfort zone

Q. Why did the lady scream when she saw her husband? A. Because he was dead.

so little jonny was doing bad in school like always so he decided to drop out and now he cant get a job and will have a terrible life and die alone

what do you call a man with no legs? disabled.

Friends are like potatoes. When you eat them, they die.

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? That's not funny.

A man is on a military operation, he dies and has a funeral.

Little boy: Daddy, daddy, I know what i want for Christmas! Dad: Oh really? and whats that? Little boy: I want a bicycle! Dad: Why my son? You are already on a wheelchair...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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