Why does the man ignore his wife? Because he is dead.

What does a cow do at McDonald's? He is eaten by obese people.

What did the rich man say to the poor man? i feel sorry for you

why did tommy cry?his mother killed his turtle on christmas

Q. what is catness and pita name together pines

What's the difference between a plane and a Muslim dentist? A plane hasn't dedicated its life to the study of dentistry

What is white but you can't see it? A bottle of milk around the corner.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The IRS. You didn't pay your taxes so we have to take you to jail.

What's it called when Justin Bieber has sex? Sex. The specific person partaking in sexual intercourse does not change the term used to describe it.

How did the man drown the fish? He ate it.

What's the difference between erotica and kink? Erotica involves simple arousal; kink usually has an added element of masochism.

A panhandler came up to me today and said he hadn't had a bite in weeks, so I gave him some change.

what's the best way to get your younger sibling to stop being annoying? Shoot Him

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

how much does a pirate pay for an earing? $2.50

What's the most annoying thing in the world? Yourself. (Your friends are saying it too, behind your back)

Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 had a gun.

What do you call an Ethiopian with a yeast infection? Quarter pounder with cheese.

Knock Knock! Who's there? I don't remember the rest of the joke but your mom's a whore.

A patient goes to the doctor. The doctor says I have bad news and even worse news. The patient says "What's the bad news?" The doctor says "You only have 24 hours to live." The patient says "Oh my gosh what could possibly be worse than that?!" The doctor says "Well...we've been trying to contact you since yesterday..."

A baby seal walks into a club.

*Knock Knock* Who's there? It's Jeff. Hi there Jeff, come in, the doors open.

What's worse than stubbing your toe? Bees inside of your eyeballs.

Q. What is a similarly between Jewa and Pizza. A. There both baked in a over

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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