God is real

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im gay

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What's the difference between a tigar and a shark? One's a land mammal.

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Hgiugsf s8dyfgc sdyhgd©•øˆ????ª•†®???ßßs cdiug dvyg 34t5 fd87 vrry utgg erug 46 5gtyrue fVTU? Tree.

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roses are red violets are blue im a paki and you are a jew!

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I hear Lebron has a new phone. He has it on silent all the time. It's because he doesn't want to disturb anyone around him while they prepare for important games in which he will be an indispensable part of, especially during the 4th quarters of the NBA Finals.

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I like apples. So does Mr. Johnson from the local fruit stand.

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knock knock Come in.

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Whats the difference between a green apple and a red apple? Their colors.

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What do a squirrel and a cucumber have in common? They both cant ride bikes

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How many blind people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Does it matter?

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Whats the difference between a ferrari and a boner? Too much to list.

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Why didn't the man say, "Hello, Morgan Freeman!" when his friend walked by? Because his friend wasn't Morgan Freeman.

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A 65 year old man is tired with his life. He begins to realize that it is meaningless to him. He wants no part in the world anymore so he decided to commit suicide. On his way to commit suicide, he comes across a magical man that has an extraordinary offer. This magical man has offered to grant the 65 year old man the power to fly. The 65 year old man, accepts the offer in great interest, but the magical man wants something in return for his deed. The 65 year old man, offers all the money in his wallet to the magical man. The magical man accepts his offer of all the money and continues. With a flick of the wrist, the magical man says, "fly, fly, high as the sky, i grant this man the ability to fly". The 65 year old man is greatly excited now that he has the ability to fly. He cant wait to try out his new power. He runs to the nearest cliff and jumps. Too bad the "magical man" was really a male prostitute that was broke and homeless. The 65 year old man died on impact and the male prostitue walked away with a wallet full of cash.

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Yo mamma is so weird most people try to avoid her.

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What's the difference between a Cadillac and a pile of dead babies? My wife didn't cheat on me in a pile of dead babies.

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knock! knock! whos there!?! abandoned baby!

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Do you really want to know what i shit? Poo

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What is the difference between my elbow and my penis? I Cant lick my elbow

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a tape worm in your apple.

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Keith figured gasoline burns, doesn't it? He was wrong.

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What's blue and fluffy? BLUE FLUFF What's white and fluffy? A BUNNY What's pink and fluffy? PINK FLUFF What's brown and fluffy? A PORCUPINE

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In soviet Russia, your dead because it doesn't exist anymore

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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