How many jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front, 2 in the back, and 50 in the ashtray.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

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If at first you don’t succeed, you clearly weren’t the right person for the job. We’re sorry, but we’re going to have to let you go; please collect your belongings and vacate the premises immediately.

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Why did the little girl jump off a cliff? because she was at a cliff jump at a water park

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What did the Hindenburg say? -nothing it just blew up

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris? All of it.

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why did every one in the world die? a Train pooped it's pants.

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What starts with a 'D' and ends with 'ick' Daniel and Jimmy are walking in the park when suddenly they get hit by a stick because a mysterious person threw the stick.

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So a man is sitting at a bar with about 20 girls sitting all around him. Amazed at this man's ability to pick up girls, another man asked him how he did. In response, the man said, "What?". The man wasn't able to hear the other man, due to the fact that there were many girls talking.

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Welcome to AntiJoke.com Jeff. Jeff just got his mind blown.

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Why didn't Susan go to school on show-and-tell day? Because she's dead.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem, Whoop-dee-do.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is an Italian pastry with tomato sauce, cheese and other toppings and the other is a human being.

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A man walks into a bar not a duck though

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Why did the orange cross half way across the road Because it ran out of juice

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follow @nils_kosmo on twatter hehe

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Teacher:What is the outer layer of a tree? Dog:Bark. Teacher: What is the square root of 69? Dog:8.30662386

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Q. What did the mockingbird say to the blue jay? A. I mock you by mocking you

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A plane crashes on the border of the United States and Canada. Where do they bury the survivors? Why would they bury the survivors? THEY'RE ALIVE

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How do you wake up lady GaGa? You po po po poker face!

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Did you hear about the one with the priest, the boy, and the dildo? Yes, sadly I have.

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What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry made it out of the chambers...

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A bar walks into a bar, it is then you realize you are in an alternate dimension.

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When Life gives you lemons... Squeeze the juice right back into Life's eyes!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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