Inspirational speaker: "You can judge a man by the way he treats those who can do nothing for him." Me: "Hitler loved dogs."

Q: What do you call black guys running down a hill? A: Black guys running down a hill.

What's worse than getting full-blown AIDS? Finding a half-eaten worm in your apple.

why was the toddler sad? he was diagnosed with cancer after his dog was put down because it raped and murdered his parents

A coach walks into the team dressing room at halftime; his team is down 42-0. He screams at the players, "You guys are playing like a bunch of grannies. No offense"

Friends are like trees, They fall down if you hit them several times with an axe.

why can't timmy tie his shoes? Because timmy's an earth-worm

Q: what did i say when i crashed into the twin tower. A: nothing i was dead

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have alzheimers. Cheese on toast.

How do you hack into someone's computer? A few good hits with a hatchet should do the trick

a Black Swan walks into a bar......,,,.she then has hallucinations and imagines herself having lesbian sex with Mila Kunis...

What time is it when grandpa sits ontop of a telephone pole and throws pineapples at people? Time to go to a nursing home

What did the tourist in Africa get? A souvenior.

What's long hard and black A drain pipe

Why did the man climb to top of the tower? To push the Jew off.

What is lil Wayne's real name? Dwayne micheal carter jr.

There once was a girl from Nantucket, I've heard its nice there this time of year.

Roses are Gray, Violets are Gray, I am color-blind, I hate my life

Why is Osama bin laden so hard to find? Because he is dead.

learn. advance!

How are Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga similar? They are both men except Justin Beiber

Why couldn't the teenage pirate get into the movie? Because he lacked the required money for the ticket.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue Wait Arent Violets purple?

How do you kill a pirate? Throw him of a bridge

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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