What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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How many dead hookers can you fit in a trunk? Five

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What did the little girl with no arms or legs get for christmas? Nothing, she was Jewish.

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Why did Doctor Who visit Ancient Greece? Because has a time machine and has that ability

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then he sits down to enjoy his evening.

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What do yo get when you cross an insomniac,an agnostic, and a dyslexic. A very troubled man.

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why did the boy fall of the bridge? He got shot in the head.

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A: you have a strong arm. B: yea i work ou- A: you can master bate a whale.

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How do you stop a plane? Land it.

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NO! I'm putting it in my front room, you sick bastard!

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Why did Sally failed gym class Because she couldn't do push ups

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A small plane is carrying three passengers: a young boy scout, a priest, and the smartest black man on earth. Due to improper planning, there are only three parachutes on the plane. The engines cut and the pilot takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The black man says, "I am the smartest black man in the world. I need to live." He takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The priest says to the boy scout, "Son, you take the last parachute. I have lived a full life." After a very touching moment, the boy scout puts on the parachute and jumps out of the plane. Minutes later, the priest dies a horrific death as the plane crashes into the desert.

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Q: What do you get when you get a bunch of people who confuse dark humor for anti humor? A: This website.

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Character one: What did the blond say to the horse? Character two: you spelled blonde wrong.

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Vagina jokes aren't funny. Period.

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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Yo mama's so fat she has diabetes.

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What's more fun then spinning a dead baby around on a clothesline at 50 miles an hour? Stopping it with a shovel.

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Q: If a tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it, does it still make a sound? A: Yes

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What can you use a broken watch for? A compass.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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N****R = nice israeli girl great education rich

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Why didn't the pregnant, pro-choice woman have an abortion? It was a planned pregnancy.

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Where is aodhan's ma? Jail, she was cought with a bag full of the white powder.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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