Q. How do you drowned a blond A. Put a scratch and sniff at the bottom of a pool

What did the bi-polar girl do when she found our her ex-boyfriend was living with another woman? Nothing; she was happy for their new relationship and realized life moves on, in addition to taking the appropriate amount of medicine as directed by her doctor for her condition.

why did stacey marry bally because she loves him

A train conducter conducts at 60mph, when he goes under a bridge he goes at 52mph. When he goes over a hill he goes at 47mph, if he goes under 2 bridges and over 3 hills what did the conductors mother have for dinner that night. Nothing she was raped then promptly murdered.

Why couldn't the blond get into the library? Because the library was closed therefore the door was locked.

What do you call someone who takes a toaster into their bath? Adele's number one fan.

A penguin walks into a bar and orders a beer................ PENGUINS DON'T WALK OR TALK

how do you scare a deaf person? you yawn

why was the man so good at holding stuff? he was born with 4 arms!

why was the woman silent? she lost the ability to speak in a tragic boating accident in which her vocals chords were damaged thus making it incapable for her to utter anything

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get the results of his AIDS test

You: Want to hear a joke? Person: Yeah You: Me too

lewis bedford

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

What is funny about 9/11. Nothing, it was a tragic day for the world.

How do you confuse a gay person? How? 7

What did the astronaunt say to the doctor? Hola!

Knock, Knock Whos There, Jews, Jes who, Whould you like some jews with that.

knock knock who's there? John Oh, come in then

Alright alright Tifa, you look totally different from your drawn identical twin. And yeah I could have been a bit more subtle, don't you worry, I have a special knack for SPAMMING COMMENTS INTO THE ABYSS! I mean sheesh you where pretty open about it earlier, and you said you did not give a damn about what random people thought... Moral: But yeah, I can do better than that, I just do not want to, no seriously, if you are going to go feeling ashamed, then I have failed you.

Yeah, me too. The car just ran straight through the stoplight and it was all over...

A man walks into a movie theater.and attempts to parate a film. He is then caught by employees of the theater and now faces fines and possible jail time for his actions.

What did the teapot say to the teacup? Nothing. Teapots and teacups are inanimate objects, therefore, cannot speak.

What did the boy in the wheelchair get for Christmas? A bicycle.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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