Whats better than sitting here writing anti jokes? Sitting in ENGLISH and writing anti jokes. Shoutout to Link Deas

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why did the black boy fail out of high school? Because his grades were bad.

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A man walks into a bar. Then he buys a beer.

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What's worse than eating a piece of elephant shit? Eating two pieces of elephant shit.

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What do you call a man will dementia who just killed his cousins, wife, children, and teacher. His name. He's still a man until he's put in a mental institution.

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what is the difference between jelly and jam? jelly is smoother where jam has chunks of fruit in it...... and i cant jelly my penis down your throat

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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A kid walked into a bar and ordered a drink and then was arrested for drinking under the age of 18

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what do round tank toilets do? blow up CC

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Haiku's aren't real poems. No body understands them. My soul is burned toast.

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The chicks at the bar last night were do hot. The girls weren't half bad either

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What has red dots and is yellow all over A poisonous frog

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Why did danielle drop her ice cream cone? Because she was diabetic and had a blood sugar of 5.

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Alpine Ibexes climb nearly 90 degree angles to lick salt deposits off mountain sides. They crave that mineral.

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Why did Billy fall over? Because someone tripped him.

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Why did thw chicken cross the road? Because his parents died.

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what do you call a man with no arms no legs cancer and down syndrome? you call him stephen because his name is stephen

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What do you call three mexicans in a bowl of soup? Whatever their respective names might happen to be.

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What did santa say to the little girl on Christmas Eve? Santa isn't real, but pedophiles are.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sally. I don't know anyone by that name, please go away.

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What did the Atheist say to priest? Evolution

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was an identity thief.

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Why is justin bieber gay? because he is attracted to men

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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