whats long, hard and full of seamen submarine

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call an arab flying a 747? A pliot.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

thumb_up thumb_down -54

Why did the dog cross the road? He was on a walk with his owner so they used a crosswalk to safely get back home.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the homeless man give his friends for Christmas? More AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided? Everyone on board died.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

lybia

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did god make women? Because women are equally important when it comes to the birth to maintain or species.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A man walks in to a bar and orders a drink. He has been drinking alone every day since his wife an unborn child died in an horrific car accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why was the black man excited when he found a $20 bill on the ground? -Anyone would be excited

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the black man scream in church? He felt like it.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you call a Muslim on the moon? An astronaut

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Roses are Grey, Violets are Grey, I am Colorblind...FML

thumb_up thumb_down -6

HOW MANY CRACK-HEADS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB? NONE, THERE AIN'T NO ELECTRICITY IN THE CRACKHOUSE!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

knock knock... whose there? I don't know why don't you open it and find out dumb ass... Gosh people and their common sense these days!!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

"HEY DUMB FU** THIS STUFF IS SUPPOSED TO BE FUNNY!!!" SAID SIMON COWELL!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

I enjoy anal.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Yo mama got so bad teeth her dentist said she should get them surgicly removed and get lifelike dentures

thumb_up thumb_down -32

there is a black guy riding a bicycle. he is extremely skilled on it and says he has never fallen off.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Nobody cares maddie!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A: What dose God listen to? B: Slayer. A: Trick Question, God=Slayer

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Yo momma is So Fat? And isn't your cousin Chow Yun Fat? I think I know some of the Fat family. How are they all doing?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the fireman say to the people in the burning house I'm going to use this water for my sprinkler rather than saving your lives. I might as well use this for something more significan, like my lawn.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A bar walks into a man

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops