The only thing worse than finding a repeated joke on Anti-Joke is finding a REAL joke on Anti-Joke

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

wheres a place a cancer patient cant go? the hairdressers

Knock, knock. Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your spouse is in hospital.

Why to lawyers wear neckties? It's part of the uniform.

What did the school bully get for his birthday? Beaten by his alcoholic father. Children are a product of their environment and his father's abusive nature towards his son forced the young boy to act out in class giving him the reputation of a bully.

Why was Harry arrested? Because he stabbed multiple children.

Why did the car slow down? Becuase the driver pressed the break

wat is the name of a girl u can play connect the dots on her face laurie pisciotta

What do you get when you cross a muslim and a mexican? i don't know, i just thought that this would make an interesting question.

why did the man go to prison? he was a serial rapist.

yo momma is so tall shes tall

What's 9+10=? 19

Wha did the fireman say when he burnt his finger? Shit.

Q) How many times did the woman jump off the cliff? A) Once she died.

What did the duck say to the man? Nothing. Ducks cannot talk.

What do you call a blonde with a broken arm? A cripple.

Yo mama is so old, that it's becoming apparent that she is most likely developing severe senial dementia

Why did the fireman wear red suspenders? Because they were part of his uniform.

Why was the blonde so stupid? He had dyslexia and to make fun of his hardship would truly be a hardship of human morals.

Why did the Black man cross the street? To get to the other side.

What do you get when you cross a leopard and Chuck Norris? I don't know. Probably something like a furry yellow Chuck Norris with black spots and sharp teeth.

A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch."

There's a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead who sit next to each other in college. They are good students and regularly do their homework.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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