Butterfly is standing on a flower. Cow comes and steps on that flower

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Can you say the word "toy boat" 10 times fast? No

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Roses are red Violets are blue Its 2 in the morning Go the f+%& to sleep.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse doesn't reply because horse can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Hey girl, do you have a mirror in your pocket? Because I dropped one and I can't find it.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

My girlfriend wanted to talk about her feelings ... SO I TOLD THAT BITCH THAT... i really loved her and care about her feelings

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the blind lady say to her cat? Nothing she doesn't have a cat.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the blonde order in the restaurant? A cup of coffee.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Fact: 100% of people who drink alcohol will die.

thumb_up thumb_down

two muffins were in an oven. one muffin says, "gee, its hot in here." the other one says, "AH! A TALKING MUFFIN!"

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a larger individual having intense sex with a smaller individual? Rape.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Friends are like trees. They fall when hit multiple times with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What was black, then white, now dead all over? Michael Jackson.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what are you eating under there? oh a sandwich, its actually really good.... want a bite? yea thanks! yum yum

thumb_up thumb_down +33

what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding several worms in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Becuse 7 was a convicted serial killer. >----->

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Q: Why did the kid drop his icecream cone? A: Because he couldn't hold it he lost his arms in a car accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A married couple lies in bed, making out. They must really love each other.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Knock, Knock Who's There

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? a horse

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Guess what I saw... Wood, I'm a carpenter.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Games stop telling me to press any key to continue. That key doesn't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops