There are 5 men in a desert a black man a white man a gay a lesbian and a white woman they have no food or water and haven't had any in 3 weeks civilization is 1 mile away how many people live and which ones They all die you can only live 3 days without water.

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What is green and smells like paint? Grass, it doesnt smell like paint, I lied.

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You know that Duck song on youtube? I dont get it... ducks cant talk...

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What did the Germans cook in their giant oven made for cooking jews? Jews.

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roses are red violets are blue i have Downs Syndrome... and a ding-dong potato

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A penguin is driving through Arizona when his car's oil pressure light comes on. He drops his car off with a mechanic who says he'll get to it soon, and to come back in an hour. The penguin leaves the garage and, seeing a Baskin-Robbins across the street, stops in and orders a dish of ice cream. As he eats the ice cream he reflects on the series of extraordinary events that led him to this place, this time, this situation.

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Which is better; having a billion dollars or a trillion dollars? Trick Question, you aren't that rich.

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Q. Whats brown and sticky? A. Poo

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Rebecca Black walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender doesnt serve her because she is 12.

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Asians...

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Why do women wear makeup and perfume? Because they're ugly and they smell bad.

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Why did the boy's house get destroyed? It was bombed.

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Why are tests such a pain in the ass? Because your vomiting shit you'd learned the night before.

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Did you hear about the guy with seven fingers? You should, because almost everybody has seven fingers.

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Why did the cow puke up his grass? Because it is necessary so that the cow can re-chew his food to aid with the digestion.

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A man is sitting on a park bench crying. A blonde walks by and asks him why he's sad. The man proceeds to explain he just lost his children in a custody battle with his ex wife.

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What has eyes but can't see? A blind person.

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How does a gay take his pants off? Just like everybody else

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split your ass cheek

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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retard

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Steve is 12. He has a friend named Gary. Later in his life steve will realize that he is gay and will fall for a man also named Gary. Gary and steve will be together forever. Until steves friend gary goes insane because this man has stollen his name and go and kill the other gary. The end.

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Why was the boy crying? he was so happy his mom bought him a playstation 3

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whats the difference between a dead dog and a dead black guy there were skid marks in front of the dead dog

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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