penis

Your mother smells so bad that people make comments about it behind her back, and one person mailed her some soap.

So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down, and orders a drink. After giving the pirate a drink, the bartender looks down and notices that there is a steering wheel on the pirate's penis. "Sir, are you aware that there is a steering wheel on your penis?" The bartender asked. "Arrrrrrr, it's driving me crazy!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon," said the bartender, "It looks very uncomfortable and could be dangerous to your health...not to mention your penis is out in the open." "Yes, you are probably right," the pirate agreed. He proceeded to get a ride from a friend to the nearest hospital, for drinking and driving can be dangerous, and steering wheels on penises are not safe.

if it takes skill to trip over a flat surface, i have no skill...

How many kids with ADHD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Popsicle!

Knock knock! *no answer* KNOCK KNOCK! *still no answer* the person who was knocking finds a note sticked on the door and it says: i will be away for 2 weeks

Why did the cookie go to the doctor? It didn't, a cookie is a food, therefore it doesn't have working organs.

guess how...chicken pow! guess who...chicken poo! guess when...chicken pen! guess where...chicken hair! guess what...your adopted.

Q:Why are dinosaurs extinct? A:Well there are two reasons the first being a giant meteor struck the earth killing all the dinosaurs. The other reason you touch yourself at night.

How do you make a clown happy then sad? You give him pot then shoot him in the foot

how many babies does it take to fill up a blender? None. they all died before being put in a blender.

Why did the girl suck the other guy off? to get paid

Walt disney Walks Into A Bar, The Bartender says "WOAH ITS WALT DISNEY!"

why did the girl fall of her bike She had no arms

how do you kill chuck norris? you dont, killing is illegal

3 blonds walk into a bar ouch

Women's Rights.

Why is siracha taste so good on chicken? Because it compliments the meat.

josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

What do you get when you mix a fox and a sloth? a..FOTH

Smelly Indians.

Why wasn't the woman happy when she gave birth? Because she was thrown into a pool of semen 9 months ago.

What did one black guy say to the other black guy? I haven't thought of it yet....

While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...