When life gives you lemons you leave the earth in search of what strange lifeform sent you them.

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A brunette, redhead, and a blond were on a road trip when their car broke down in the middle of a desert. The red-head offered to walk down the road to get help, for none of them knew how to repair the car. She walked down the road in the direction they were headed, but never came back. The redhead and blond died several days later in the shade of the car as a result of extensive heat exhaustion.

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Why did the Mexican choose the blue marker over the green one? Because he his favorite color was green, and it was Opposite Day.

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What did the black man do with the woman's purse? Safely returned it to her

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I'm going to live to be 300 years old or die trying!

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Justin Beiber has fame, his own bodyguards, he has performed many shows and has everyone's attention. What do you have? A penis.

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whats the difference between a baby and a puppy? i care when the puppy dies....

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What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

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What did the policeman say to the man robbing the bar? Stealing is wrong. Then the police read the man his Miranda laws.

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MURRRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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A man walked into a haunted house and screamed. He had stepped on a nail.

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Roses are red violets are red I think I'm bleeding It's getting in my eyes

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pobody's nerfect

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Women.

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A black guy walks into a bar. He drinks some wine and exits the bar. -Lets Go Mets, not Yankees

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A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

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To mamas so fat shes fat

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A kid walks into a bar. He leaves wasted.

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Jack and jill went up a hill to get some water. Jack fell down, twisted his ankle, and continued to roll. He broke his spine and collar bone and he was later taken to the hospital. Later that night he died because the doctors couldn't do anything. Jill then killed herself in mourning.

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whats blue and can fly? a red robin i lied about being blue By RT so u believe me

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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What do you call a kid with cancer? screwed

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A duck walks passed a lemonade stand.

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What did the nintendo Wii say as it went down the slide? They don't talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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