How many doctors does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

Q: why did the black guy die? A: he got shot

I insist, you go ahead. See you around. how about in four six hours?

Knock Knock. Who's there? The Gestapo.

Q.what do you call a dead baby? A. a dead baby

what do u call 2 puerto rician men playing basketball? won on won

fart+fart=poop

What do you call a rabbit with carrots in its ears? Anything, it can't hear you!

What's the worst part about seeing a dead baby on the beach? The crushing sadness.

Name an American born white man in the NBA. Thats right, you cant

a suicidal man walks up 49 floors and enters a room and opens the window. hes worked there for 5 years and the air condition is broken

Yo mama so ugly... She never got married because most men found it hard to marry her because of her looks

Why did the chicken cross the road? There is no reason. Chickens have short memories and no motivations other than food.

Why did the hot blonde strip down? So she can take a shower

steven hawking walks into a bar just kidding he has a horrable disiese preventing him from walking

lasdjf;lasdjf'liasndkjv afv kaf bk fvj adjkfg akd glkjsa nkgj adfkg kad g sdfk kwjt hjqwneog dfog qi4g oist hbioer voi fboiq erob ogi boiqer boie boi wreoig eoi lasdjf;lasdjf'liasndkjv afv kaf bk fvj adjkfg akd glkjsa nkgj adfkg kad g sdfk kwjt hjqwneog dfog qi4g oist hbioer voi fboiq erob ogi boiqer boie boi wreoig eoi lasdjf;lasdjf'liasndkjv afv kaf bk fvj adjkfg akd glkjsa nkgj adfkg kad g sdfk kwjt hjqwneog dfog qi4g oist hbioer voi fboiq erob ogi boiqer boie boi wreoig eoi lasdjf;lasdjf'liasndkjv afv kaf bk fvj adjkfg akd glkjsa nkgj adfkg kad g sdfk kwjt hjqwneog dfog qi4g oist hbioer voi fboiq erob ogi boiqer boie boi wreoig eoi lasdjf;lasdjf'liasndkjv afv kaf bk fvj adjkfg akd glkjsa nkgj adfkg kad g sdfk kwjt hjqwneog dfog qi4g oist hbioer voi fboiq erob ogi boiqer boie boi wreoig eoi lasdjf;lasdjf'liasndkjv afv kaf bk fvj adjkfg akd glkjsa nkgj adfkg kad g sdfk kwjt hjqwneog dfog qi4g oist hbioer voi fboiq erob ogi boiqer boie boi wreoig eoi lasdjf;lasdjf'liasndkjv afv kaf bk fvj adjkfg akd glkjsa nkgj adfkg kad g sdfk kwjt hjqwneog dfog qi4g oist hbioer voi fboiq erob ogi boiqer boie boi wreoig eoi lasdjf;lasdjf'liasndkjv afv kaf bk fvj adjkfg akd glkjsa nkgj adfkg kad g sdfk kwjt hjqwneog dfog qi4g oist hbioer voi fboiq erob ogi boiqer boie boi wreoig eoi lasdjf;lasdjf'liasndkjv afv kaf bk fvj adjkfg akd glkjsa nkgj adfkg kad g sdfk kwjt hjqwneog dfog qi4g oist hbioer voi fboiq erob ogi boiqer boie boi wreoig eoi lasdjf;lasdjf'liasndkjv afv kaf bk fvj adjkfg akd glkjsa nkgj adfkg kad g sdfk kwjt hjqwneog dfog qi4g oist hbioer voi fboiq erob ogi boiqer boie boi wreoig eoi lasdjf;lasdjf'liasndkjv afv kaf bk fvj adjkfg akd glkjsa nkgj adfkg kad g sdfk kwjt hjqwneog dfog qi4g oist hbioer voi fboiq erob ogi boiqer boie boi wreoig eoi lasdjf;lasdjf'liasndkjv afv kaf bk fvj adjkfg akd glkjsa nkgj adfkg kad g sdfk kwjt hjqwneog dfog qi4g oist hbioer voi fboiq erob ogi boiqer boie boi wreoig eoi lasdjf;lasdjf'liasndkjv afv kaf bk fvj adjkfg akd glkjsa nkgj adfkg kad g sdfk kwjt hjqwneog dfog qi4g oist hbioer voi fboiq erob ogi boiqer boie boi wreoig eoi lasdjf;lasdjf'liasndkjv afv kaf bk fvj adjkfg akd glkjsa nkgj adfkg kad g sdfk kwjt hjqwneog dfog qi4g oist hbioer voi fboiq erob ogi boiqer boie boi wreoig eoi lasdjf;lasdjf'liasndkjv afv kaf bk fvj adjkfg akd glkjsa nkgj adfkg kad g sdfk kwjt hjqwneog dfog qi4g oist hbioer voi fboiq erob ogi boiqer boie boi wreoig eoi lasdjf;lasdjf'liasndkjv afv kaf bk fvj adjkfg akd glkjsa nkgj adfkg kad g sdfk kwjt hjqwneog dfog qi4g oist hbioer voi fboiq erob ogi boiqer boie boi wreoig eoi lasdjf;lasdjf'liasndkjv afv kaf bk fvj adjkfg akd glkjsa nkgj adfkg kad g sdfk kwjt hjqwneog dfog qi4g oist hbioer voi fboiq erob ogi boiqer boie boi wreoig eoi AKSDNFK;SANFKANSDFLJNASDKFNASLDFN VOOL?

whats worse than snakes on a plane? terrorists

Why couldn't the boy write his name because he had no arms.

Q:Whats the difference between Glenn Close and a black widow? A:one is a person, the other is a species of spider.

Yo momma's so old, she lives in a nursing home and is on various medications that she needs to take to stay in optimum health.

When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

Q: How do you get a jewish girls number? A: You roll up her sleeve

The Mexican word of the day is JUICY. Tell me if juicy see the cops.

9/11/2001

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...