what's white and long and hairy? -Dean when hes on his period

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A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. "Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?" The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?" The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch." A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money, I forgot what happens right but it wasn't that funny anyway

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Why did the washing machine laugh? Because it took the piss out of the knickers!!!!! :)

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What did the monster under the bed say to another monster? I have the odd feeling that someone is on top of the bed.........

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hello what is this crazy nonsense site sl

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I don't have friends, so I'm anti-social.

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What do you call a deaf person? You don't they can't hear you.

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A man walks into a bar and says Ouch.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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how do you save a baby from drowning? Take your foot off the back of its head.

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A black guy, a mexican, and an arab are all in the same car, Whos driving the car? The black guy because he politely offered and his friends were happy to ride with him.

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what do you get when you cross a daniel lesiak with nothing?

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A dad says to his son "you better stop masturbating or youll go blind'. And the son says "dad im over here".

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A man offered a little boy a ride home. He drove the boy home where his father preceeded to beat him senseless.

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What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education (and quite possibly from acquaintances or family members within the company that employs him, though it is often considered impolite to mention this latter fact, as it may be construed to denigrate the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study).

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You know how geese fly in a V formation and sometimes one side is longer than the other. Do you know why that is? Because there are more geese on that side.

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CFL

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there's two nuns cycling down a cobbled street. one nun says:ooo iv'e never been this way before! the other nun says:i'm not surprised there's roadworks and a diversion!

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Whats green has four legs and would kill you if it fell from a tree. Pool Table.....

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There are two bears in a shower. One bear says "pass the soap." the other bear says "no soap. Radio."

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Your Mama's so fat that the Doctor recommended a healthy eating diet, and to exercise daily.

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Shaniqua: Knock knock Random black guy: Who is there? Shaniqua: It's me your girlfriend I had a really nice meeting with my dick Random black guy:What?

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme Others don't

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Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, Retinal Hemorrhage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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