An Irishman walks into a bar and orders a gin and tonic. The bartender gives him a sprite and charges him $12.

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Why did the child get an 100% on a test?? Because they got all the questions correct.

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Yo mama's so ugly that the majority of people find her physically unattractive, but I hear her personality if great.

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What is the diffrents between a Mexican and a elevator? one can raise children the other is a mexican!!!!!

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whats gay and american? a gay american

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Why did the boy eat the worm? Because his parents were starving him, and it was all he had.

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A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doc, I don't know what to do! One day I'm a wig wam, the other day I'm a teepee, then I'm a wigwam, then I'm a teepee again!" The doctor sighs and replies,"Sir, we've been over this. You have stage four periodic cancer."

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What's the difference between a duck? An armchair because the vest has no sleeves.

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Q: why did suzie fall out of the swing? A: because she was a pinecone

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A bishop died and went to heaven. At the Pearly gates he sees Saint Peter , so he says to Peter "All my life I've been a committed Christian, but I just before I died I was tempted by a woman of ill repute". Saint Peter says "This is just an illusion, your dying brain is merely conjuring up images based on your presuppositions of an 'afterlife'. You have about three seconds left"

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What do you call a mexican with a broom in his hand? a man who likes to keep his office at his own company clean

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, it's destroy his family and career.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the most direct path to his destination.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Your landlord, clear out your stuff by tuesday"

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What did the black guy say when after he jumped in the pool? Wow, its kinda chilly.

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Q: if it takes a week to walk a fortnight how many pounds of oranges can you fit in a grapegruit. A: None, because there is no bones in ice cream

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Have you ever had sex with a woman (or several at once) and suddenly thought somethi... Moral: Nevermind, like you ever had sex! LOL!

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Q:Why did the black man shoot the white man? A:The black man happened to be extremely good at paintball.

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If you posten bout Kony I feel bad for you son. Cause ive snached 99 children and you pst saved none jesse

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A: Can I get a tall white Russian. B: No. A: Why not? B: Because this is a Barnes and Nobles. However, we do have a Starbucks, and I can offer you a venti caramel iced coffee"

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What has wheels and flies? An Airplane

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How many dead babies can you fit in a child's swimming pool? 9 (Trust me, you won't be able to squeeze the tenth one in there.)

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What do you call a gay, black, Muslim physician? Doctor.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops