Why did the man's legs start shaking when he saw the attractive women? There was an earthquake

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What did the young girl say to her step-dad? Nothing. She no longer talks to him after years and years of sexual abuse which left her emotionally scarred.

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Why was the man picking his nose? Because he was born without one, and found one he liked.

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What is the same between a turtle and an eagle? They both fly, apart from the turtle.

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Guess what. I eat weed and smoke yogurt

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why was the blonde fired from the factory? she ate the maneger's fingers.

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A blind man walks into a bar. He cannot read the drink menu.

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Whats the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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Roses are red,violets are blue you want me but i dont want you!

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What happens every 10 seconds in Africa? 10 seconds passes by.

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How do you make a little boy cry? Slap the cookie out of his hand.

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A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his town.

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yo mamma's so fat, she decided to go on a diet

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Person 1: It's your birthday? Person 2: Yeah! Person 1: Oh.

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Why is it that all cats dislike flying saucers? The strange noises and lights probably frighten them, as they don't understand the concepts of extra-terrestrial intelligence and space travel.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poems, Show me your tits.

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What do you say the big head boy? Brush yo teeth

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I like pom

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How many Frenchmen does it take to surrender? Probably just one.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas?... A warm meal, a shower, and a place to sleep courtesy of the local homeless unit.

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What do you call a Mexican kicking a ball? A soccer player

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So there's a monkey in a bar. I forgot the rest of the joke but your moms a whore

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What did the chicken say to the black guy? Nothing, humans and chickens can not communicate.

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When I find out where you live I'm going to burn down your house, kill your family, and while your crying in you demise I am going to slit your throat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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