What is blue and has clouds in it? The sky.

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What's the difference between marmalade and jam?... you can't marmalade your dick down a girls throat.

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Why was the baby going so fast? It was tied to a bus.

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If Earth is a triangle, then why are trees smart? Because turtles have 4 legs

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Knock Knock? Whos there? akward neighbor. akward neighbor who?

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Why was the Blonde Crying? -because she had just witnessed her infant get sucked through a jet engine and was very sad.

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Pickup Line: Hay girl is that a mirror in your pants. Becuase I can see me in it.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? The number varies based on the amount of skill and understanding each infant has in using the paintbursh and red paint.

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ObamaCare

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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Friends are like snowflakes, they go away when you pee on them.

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Q: Ask me how far have you gone with a girl? A: Mexico

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What do you call a man who stole from a thief? A thief, no matter whom you are stealing from the consequences are dire.

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3 jews walk into a bar I lied it was a gas chamber

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What do you call 4 Mexicans getting into a car late at night? 3rd Shift carpooling

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What was the reason for the confused looking woman staring at the can of frozen Apple juice for twenty minutes? Some cans are difficult to open: The little ring bit comes off when you pull it, and then you have to work out a new way to open it, which takes patience and ingenuity.

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A Jew and a Nazi have dinner together...... they both immensely enjoyed the wine.

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas?

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What's the difference between jumping off of a 2 story building and a 20 story building? You're more likely to die from the latter.

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A horse walks into a bar. Animal control them came and got him out, apologizing for the matter.

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Roses are red, The grass is greener, Every time i'm with you, I touch my wiener.

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What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

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What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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What do you call an arab flying a 747? A pliot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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