Why was the little girl sad? An elephant shat on her face

thumb_up thumb_down +16

If you give a mouse a cookie... ...you're destroying its natural diet. It might die.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

person 1:Dude, look at the news person 2:Yea man, its D ick Cheney person 1: what a d ick head

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Person 1: Ask me if I'm a tree. Person 2: Are you a tree? Person 1: No.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did Sally flunk math? Because she didn't achieve the passing grade which is 60 percent or greater. She might need some tutoring in order to master the concept of the lessons to which she has difficulty solving.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

whats worse than a dog biting you? two dogs biting you whats worse than that? the Holocaust whats worse than that three dog bites and one of them happens to have rabies

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the apple say to the orange? The apple did not say anything at all because fruits do not possess the ability of speech.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Knock, Knock ...

thumb_up thumb_down -26

whats worse then finding a worn in your apple the holocaust whats worse then the holocaust two worms in your apple

thumb_up thumb_down

The Ohio State Buckeyes

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A hispanic man eats a taco and enjoys. He is kicked in the nuts 2 months later.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the voices told him to...

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

How do racist jokes start? Generally with a racially insensitive stereotype.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

why is john so fat years of over eating

thumb_up thumb_down -5

a show horse jumps over a bar

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why were the sea hawks fans mad at the Super Bowl? Because why would you throw the ball if you have one yard to go

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What's the best part about a birthday cake? Eating it.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the monster under the bed say to another monster? I have the odd feeling that someone is on top of the bed.........

thumb_up thumb_down -24

This guy dies and his wife gets him cremated. She takes the ashes home and lays them out on the table and starts talking to them. "You know that fur coat you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money. You know the new car you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money." Then she whispers, "You know that blow job I promised you? Well, here it comes..."

thumb_up thumb_down -18

wanna hear a sad joke? you! by mad james

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy wuzzy had cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did 16-year-old girl scream in the basement? She was being raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the fridge say when I opened it? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops