A zookeeper, a shoemaker, and a guy named Billy Jones walks into a bar. The bartender says "sorry, we closed". So they left.

How do you punish Helen Keller? Set a restriction on something she enjoys that is equal to the degree of her misbehavior.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He believed pedestrians had the right

What did the black boy find on his doorstep A package from his grandparents in Australia

My Penis is so big. How big is it? If you lay my penis down beside another similarly lengthy object, approximately 10" long, it would most likely surpass the length of the object you chose to measure it to.

"Roses are red, violets are blue," she explained to the color blind child, who was unable to understand the concept of color.

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Approximately 75 pounds of wood a day

theres a fork in a drawer half way open and a knife in a cup on the counter. how does the knife get into the drawer, it cant knife are incapable of moving

Hey, did u know that diarrhea is hereditary? It runs in your jeans By: Trey & Trenton of Texas

Chuck Norris doesnt eat honey, hes allergic to it.

Q: What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by 2 giant scorpions, a fridge, some potatoes and a hule bunch of worms.

The original Moral Man has left Horsehead network, but I will keep monitoring this section for like 3 hours... Then probably never again on this shit site it barely works ffs! Moral: "Turn every stone, and you might find a penny, turn every penny and you might find a stone that stone is in our shoe, kick it away, crush it, destroy it"

i love antijokes

guy walks into a bar a metal bar ouch

http://www.google.com/imgres?q=harry+styles+funny&hl=en&safe=active&biw=1024&bih=398&gbv=2&tbm=isch&tbnid=lc8_fNCatYHOqM:&imgrefurl=http://www.vervegirl.com/harry-being-typical-harry/&docid=86Gw8eNJ73tOYM&imgurl=http://www.vervegirl.com/cms/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/harry-styles-300.jpg&w=300&h=400&ei=q4vHT9XwHYL48gSJoJzJDw&zoom=1

How do Yankees fans cheer for their favorite sports team? Let's go Yankees!

what do an black ,am and a bicycle have in comman there both objects

What's worse than seeing Helen Keller behind the wheel of a car? Being run over by Helen Keller.

whats green and has wings ? a flying patch of astro turf

My thanks to those that thumb down my comment below, you have the possibilty to become one of my over 100.000.000 members, as long as you follow your heart, your own will, we got you covered. We got over 600.000 never members since last year, you are far from alone, thumb this comment up, leave a small comment, and I shall send one of my shadows to tell you more, or online if you prefer that, but then I would need your email address... ...As for your home address? Nah, already know it just let me know if you want a visit, but during my 6000 years on earth or so, I have yet to evolve to the point where I fully understand the full nature of computers, they are very recent to me. Yet only those that are willing to follow their hearts and enact their true hidden desires without shame, guilt, remorse, but instead with love and gusto, will find the answers among us. Soon my wings shall spread, and just like that, the world is ours! Moral: "Fuck Morals, would you believe me if I said they where in code? No they are not, the secrets are only within the shadows, and the Black Angel. Nero.

A woman walks into a bar and orders a pint of ale. "Are you a Lesbian?", joked the barman. "Yes", replied the woman.

Why'd the plane crash? Because the pilot was an orange.

WHY did the man refuse to put on his shoes? He didnt want shoes on

--Knock Knock Who's there? --Banana Banana who? --Knock Knock You just said that --Sorry i have Alzheimer's

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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