Roses are brown, violets are brown, who keeps shitting in my garden?

This guy says: "Doctor doctor, it hurts when I do this!" He jiggles his arm and screames in pain. The doctor replies: "Well, don't do it then!"

Knock knock! Who's there? It's me, Allison. Oh, come in!

Why did the girl drop her lollipop? She got hit by a truck

What do you call a person with no eyes, ears, or mouth? Helen Keller

What do you call a naked black person? A black guy

Why was 6 afraid of 7 ? Because 6 was registered as a sex offender

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

A Finnish guy and a Russian guy go into a sauna. The Russian died.

Why black guys are the fasttest runners? Because the slowers are already in prison

why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

A blonde walks into a bar. Shes now in a coma.

roses are red, violets are blue, i have AIDS, now so do you.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?". The horse doesn't respond because it neither speaks nor understands English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables on the way.

A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, build up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

Why did the jew go into the gas chamber? Because he thought he was going to get a shower.

What do you call a Man who likes little childeren A Nittany Lion.

A Priest, a Rabbi and an Imam all get on the same flight. About half-way through an engine begins to smoke and stutters to a halt. Fortunately, the pilot has been trained for these situations and lands the aircraft safely.

what did one sandwich say to another sandwich? nothing, sandwiches cant talk

Two muffins are in an oven. How does that even work? Muffin pans come with either 6 or 12 muffin holders.

Two horses were discussing their racing records. The first said, "In my whole life I had won ten races." The second horse says, "Well, I've won twelve of those!" A greyhound trotting by chimes in, "Not bragging guys, but in my career, I've won twenty!" "Unbelievable!" exclaimed both horses. "It's a talking dog!"

Who enforces the law strongly and forces people to obey them? Terrorists that have seized control of a town.

Why do all black people have AIDS? Because they deserve it.

knock knock whos there boo boo who why are you sad my wife has cancer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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