How many apples fit in a garbage bag? I actually don't know. I was asking you.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Chrysanthemums our orange violettes are musical

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I chucked a shit and flushed the toilet.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Lacrosse is the best sport in the world

thumb_up thumb_down -134

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken is subject to speculation.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

I hate blackniggers

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the skeleton not get invited to the party? Because he was a heroin addict

thumb_up thumb_down -12

how do u stop a cat from peeing on the floor? Kill it... haha

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what its name is.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: What do you call a fish with no eye? A: Fssshh

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Whats red and bad for your teeth? Bricks

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what do a blonde and a brunette have in common? They were both red-heads until they walked into great clips.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What happened? I have absolutely no idea.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did Helen Keller say to her mother? Nothing coherent.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why was the blonde girl stupid? She had suffered sever brain damage the previous month and was still recovering.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

My love life

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released into a nearby park.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why did the boy in a wheelchair cry? His mum just got shot in front of his eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas? Because his parents are dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How did the blond's brain cells die? She had a very acute case of Parkinson's disease.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why don't elephants smoke? Because they would be afraid of the fire, and they are much more adversely affected by recreational drugs than humans are.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man that says YOU SUCK MY DICK YEAH!finds a woman that says YOU SUCK MY BOOB YEAH!They get married,The woman is actually a gay man!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Whats that cool sound it makes when you thumbs a comment?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is brown and sounds like a pickle? Poop

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops