Why did the hamster not eat it's food? Because it wasn't hungry.

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How do white people screw in light bulbs? They read a manual.

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james schmitt whats your last name

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: In order to avoid being mauled by a coyote.

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How did the blonde die? She got swallowed whole by a 1,000-foot scorpion.

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What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he accidently dropped it.

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Why are Black Guys Black? Migration and adaptation to the harsh heat of the southern Sahara Desert. DUH.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 was a pussy.

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What did Hitler say to the black jew? Get to the back of the oven

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Why couldn't little Tiffany play kickball with the other kids at recess? I chopped her legs off.

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What do you get if you have 59 apples in your right hand and 74 pints of ice cream in your right? Large hands.

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Why did I kill the Muslim because I'm smart

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Why did the man cross the road? His mother had recently passed away after a 12 year battle with lung cancer and is visiting her tombstone.

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People used to throw rocks at whores. Now they're throwing wood. *Hint. Hint.*

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Your momma's so fat that when she uses a hoolahoop, she gets tired after one try and has to stop.

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The Dalai Lama orders a slice of pizza for $2 and gives the cashier a $5 bill. He then realizes he hasn't been given any change, so he asks for his change. The cashier quickly apologizes and hands the Dalai Lama three dollar bills.

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A woman walks out of the kitchen.

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Hellen Keller walks into a bar. And a tree. And a lamp.

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Knock knock? Who's there? Cancer Cancer who? After some time and various bouts of radiation and chemotherapy, he finally lost his life to the terrible disease.

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tuna fish dolphins sharks idk

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you got Lady Gaga, Taylor Swift, and Reese Witherspoon. Which do you think is more succesful

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Knock-Knock who's there? Artichoke Artichoke who? Your friend Artie choked on a ham sandwich, and I'm sorry to inform you that he didn't survive.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he wants to drink. He orders a beer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops