A Psychologist said that I am a pessimist... Figures.

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An iguana walks out of a bar

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the cock was on the other side.

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first man to WALK on the MOON. And Michael Jackson was a child molester.

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2 men shot up a morgue, 16 bodies remain dead

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Hey Patrick Yea? I found something funnier then 24 Give to me buddy 25

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Today I went to the grocery store. I purchased milk, eggs, orange juice, and my favorite breakfast cereal for $18.73. I subsequently got into my sedan and drove home.

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what has two legs, and is red? half a cat.

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How does a blonde get pregnant? (I don't know) And you thought blondes were dumb.

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When the world ends what would be the death toll It would be unknown since every one would be around to calculate it

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what did the cow said to the other cow? Moo

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple ? Joseph Fritzl.

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Why did the little boy fall down the steps? Because he wasn't a very stable person.

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Why did the garbage man cross the road? He was doing his job.

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A man with Tourettes walks into his Daughter's kindergarten classroom. Fortunately, he was able to control himself and refrain from any outbursts of profanity during the visit.

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Tin is a chemical element with symbol Sn (for Latin: stannum) and atomic number 50. It is a main group metal in group 14 of the periodic table. Tin shows chemical similarity to both neighboring group-14 elements, germanium and lead, and has two possible oxidation states, +2 and the slightly more stable +4. Tin is the 49th most abundant element and has, with 10 stable isotopes, the largest number of stable isotopes in the periodic table. It is a silvery, malleable other metal that is not easily oxidized in air, obtained chiefly from the mineral cassiterite where it occurs as tin dioxide, SnO2.

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When life gives you lemons, you must also have a proportionally sufficient amount of both water and sugar in order to make lemonade.

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Knock knock: Who's there: Woo: Woo Who: I knew you'd be glad to see me.

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A man jumped off a bridge. He went bungee jumping with his family and had a great time.

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What do you call a house big enough to fit all the poor people in America? A fairly large establishment without quality standards.

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2

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Knock Knock Come in

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm only 13 so if you have sex with me it's illegal.

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Do you want to hear a knock knock joke? (Yes) Okay, you start. (Knock knock). Who's there? ...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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