A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

What do you get when you cross a bungie cord and an owl? My ass :)

A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

What's worse than breaking a leg? Breaking two legs.

Oh, no! There is a ginger jew within 2 meters of me!

Wilson: would you buy lottery when you grow up Mattuew: no theres no point Wilson: ask Xiangxi right next to you Mattuew: xiangxi, would you buy lottery if you grow up? Xiangxi: Prabably not, because the chance of winning a lottery is lower than becoming an astronaut Mattuew: the probability of you winning the lottery is higher than you finding a girlfriend

Knock knock! Who's there? Boo! Boo who? Aww, don't cry!

Two muffins are in an oven, when one muffin says to the other "its hot in here." The other muffin then says, "whoa! a talking muffin!"

The funniest thing about this joke is that by the time you realise it doesn't say anything its to late to stop reading it

What did the iceberg say when Titanic crashed on it? "Yeah!"

How did leatherface cut a tree when he lost his chainsaw? He just asked a friendly neighbor to borrow him a axe

I literally died laughing

10 years ago, i man got cancer. He recovered and now leads a normal life.

If you're happy and you know it - put your hands in the air i have a gun.

What's the difference between a cow and a cow? Nothing, they are both the same.

You wanna hear a joke? The 19th amendment. Just kidding, women are actually a very valued part of our society. Just kidding again.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear? The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

3 guys walk into a bar. The fourth guy ducks.

Q; Why does paint dry? A; Because plankton are single cell organisms

What is green and had wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.....

what do you call a black guy falling down a hill? A hiker with an inconveniance you racist son of a bitch

Why did 6 hook up with 7 ?

And riiight after you... Hey its always ladies first.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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