How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why couldn't the melons get married? As gay cantaloupes, their jurisdiction didn't allow for same-sex marriage.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Roses are red Violets are blue I had sex with your mother

thumb_up thumb_down +14

how much c o c k could a n i g g e r lick if a f a g g o t licked a d i c k

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What is the reward for the pimp who banged a bitch? HIV

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the man do after his wife died? He farted.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

The foreskin of a baby gorilla

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A 3 year old child walks into his parents having intercorce the child asked "mommy what were you and daddy doing" she says "sex" the child was scarred for life.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the fireman wear suspenders? To keep his pants up.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Kenny died. The Bastards.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why did the virgin masturbate until his hand was raw? He didn't have lotion.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q: What is your favorite color? M: Blue

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Yo momma so fat she's obese.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Repeat after me: Silk, Silk, Silk, What's the square root of 465?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Where was the Decoration Of Independence Signed? At the bottom.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the banana go to the hospital? It didnt, bananas cannot speak or walk. It is a simple fact so you should know.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? Cause it was stapled to the cat.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why did the cow go to the theater? to see the new movies pick one and have a good time.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

This one sucks!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

why did the chicken cross the rode? so it can get the seed that is between the two yellow lines, and then he walked back without getting hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A Priest, Rabbi, and a Minister walk into a bar... i forgot the rest of the joke, but your mothers a whore!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops