If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? Jews are people

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Three blokes walk into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability

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On a scale of 1 to Chris Brown how angry are you?

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A Mexican walks into a bar. He walked out with a concussion. -ilikecrepes97

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Why couldn't the little boy open his bedroom door? He was dead.

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why do asprins work? Because they're white

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roses are blue viloets are red this poem doesnt make sense microwave

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Michael Jackson and Barack Obama talked to each other about oreos

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What kind of pizza did the world trade center order? Two cheese pizzas.

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Yo momma so stupid she tried drowning a gold fish. She got accused for animal cruelty.

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what has two feet and is black all over? your mom after she died in a horrific house fire.

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What did the chicken say to the dog? Well, since chickens can't talk, they both stood there in an awkward silence.

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What Do You Call A Man On Land With No Arms And Legs? Useless

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Yo Mama is so dumb, that she scored significantly below average on the SAT's.

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b r o k e n k e y b o a r d ! ! p l e a s e h e l p ! ! ! ! !

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o | ,'~'. / \ | ____|_ | '___,,_' .----------------. | ||(o |o)| ( KILL ALL HUMANS! ) | ------- ,----------------' | _____| -' \ '####, ------- /________\ ( ) |) '_ ' ,------|\ _ /_ / | |_\ || /_ /| | o| _\ _|| /_ / | | |\ _\____//' | ( ( | | | (_,_,_,____/ \ _\ | ------| \ _\|_________| \ _\ \__\\__\ |__| |__||__| ||/__/ |__||__| |__||__| |__||__| /__)/__) /__//__/ /__//__/ /__//__/. .' '. '. (_kOs____)____)

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? Because she had no arms... Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

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knock knock whos there cops o shit come on they found out about pot lets go

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Why did the chicken invent a memory ereaser machine? So he could erease everyone's memory so they would stop making chicken jokes

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Why is the beach always so angry? The beach is just sand and waves and lacks sentience, but makes up for it in crabs.

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What did the ocean say the other ocean? Nothing, bodies of water are incapable of speech.

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Why did helen keller's dog run away? He lost track of his destination and got lost.

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there once was a black man who played basketball

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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