Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Want to hear a joke? I'm sorry.

How many black people does it take to change a light bulb? one.

Why did the black man buy watermlons? Because a new local super market just opened and they were on sale.

Why do people hate Jews? Because there is nothing to like about them

What has 4 legs and cant walk? A paralyzed dog

Sometimes I wonder; why is that frisbee getting closer? Then it hits me. Someone just threw a frisbee at me.

What happens when cole goes into a dark room? It's not possible his hair puts off too much light

Leslie's husband admitted to being gay, which came to the surprise of no one, seeing as Leslie is a man.

Why did Kim Kardashian's and Kris Humphries marriage last so long? It didn't

knock! knock! Who's there ...So y do you have a peep whole?

Why did the Russian take a boat ride? Well this isn't possible because we all know that in Soviet Russia, boat ride you.

Why did the boy have a rash? He didn't, it was a birthmark.

Q.what is worse than finding a worm in your apple? A.finding two worms.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Your doctor, You've been diagnosed with venereal disease.

Knock knock Who's there? Cow Cow who? If you really think about it, it's really now

A man walks into a bar and says he has a talking dog. He is then taken to a mental hospital and diagnosed with schizophrenia.

Hitler walks into a bar and is shot on sight

why did the little girl fall off the swing she had no arms

Knock Knock The door's open, wipe your shoes off on the matt

Roses are red, violets are red, Tulips are red, bushes are red.... WTF MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE.

Rudolf the rednosed reindeer died today. He was reported flying over Madrid when he was hit by a jumbo jet and a flock of seagulls. People are now saying that the reindeer in Spain was hit mainly by the plane.

Whats tan and jumps higher than a frog? Mexicans..

Did you know Helen Keller had a swingset in her backyard Neither did she.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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