how do you kill jesus? with a knife

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call a kid with one leg and an eye patch? Names

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What is black, white, and red all over A penguin in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Knock Knock. Who's there? Dwayne. Ok... come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side!

thumb_up thumb_down +28

They give psychiatric patients acting classes in order for them to express and as such heal themselves? Excuse me fucktard! A guy that has deluded himself into believing he is the 11.356th Napoleon does not require further acting classes!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the pig have a band-aid? Because he had a whole in his foot.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call a horse and a donkey mixed together? A mule.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

whats worse than fining 7 dead babies in 1 trash can? finding 1 dead baby in 7 trashcans!

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did my son fall off of his bicycle? Because I hit him with a steak.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do joe greene and joe biden have in common? Their first name

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: It varies largely by hipster, the same way it does with any other person.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What did the cow say to the other cow? How should i know? Go ask them.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Q: What is the difference between a black man and a Park bench? A: A park bench is an inanimate object.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

so your snowboarding in the dessert and all four of your tires pop. how many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house. the answer is B. 500 squids

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man is standing on the street corner waiting for the bus. As it pulls up he steps on and pays his fare while he whistles to his iPod.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why does Susie fall off the swing? I shot her in the head with a pistol.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what happened to the polish man that was running late for work he got their late apparantly

thumb_up thumb_down +26

123 Main street

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What does wasabi spell backwards? Ibasaw

thumb_up thumb_down -12

69

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Whats worse than the Holocaust? Stubbing your toe

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes back from camp.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

There was once a little boy... Boy: Daddy, I am so proud of you that when I grow up I want to be just like you! God: Son how dareth thou! That is a horribleth and shameful wish! I just called the adoption agency thy areth noteth my... er.. sonneth anymoreth! NOW GO TO HELL! Oh, and you get same powers as I by the way, just for Good measure or something, except I can destroy you whenever I want, I just do not want to because your evil will hopefully make me look good in comparison after I rid the world of the first testament anyways :P Boy: Yay? :( Where is hell by the way? Moral: That little boy grew up to become... SUPERMAN! While Satan never discovered what hell was since its a concept added by corrupt priests around the 1700`s in order to scare people into following their God instead.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops