What did the pig say after having sex? "Oink".

Why do you have to write a conclusion at the end of your paper? So people dont have to read the whole thing.

What's big, black, wide, long, and has white lines all over it? A new highway road.

so a piece of grass is walking down the street..... wait a minute thats not right.

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Well, you should, if only for the cultural experience.

What is really hard around Kim Kardashian? Diamonds.

Two small boys are walking in a schoolyard. One of the boys sits down under a tree looking distraught. The other asks him "Well whats the matter Eddy?" "Every time I walk to my bus-stop in the morning, Jimmy Krugan, pushes me down and takes my money. " The first boy thinks for sec.. "Well here's what you do Ed; go to your Dad's shed and grab a 2X4, paint it bright blue. In the morning, walk to school with it under your jacket and when Jimmy starts in on you give him a good wallop. He wont be bothering you anymore." The following day the boys are in the yard again. Eddy is seen under the tree seeming just as distraught. Confused, the boy asks him.. "Well Ed, did you do what I told you?" "No."

Haikus are easy. but sometimes they don't make sense. refrigerator.

Why'd the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Chickens are raised on farms, which are away from society. They are taken care of in pens, and have no way of escaping. Therefore it couldn't have crossed any roads.

Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Having a giant, angry ape on steroids rip your heart out and eat it before your eyes as you painfully die from the unbearable pain and rapid blood loss.

your mom is so black that it can be assumed she is of african descent

Why didn't the boy respond to the text? His phone had run out of charge.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Skeletons can't move.

roses are red leather is black when when god made you he was smoking crack

Q: What's the difference between an African American and a bench? A: An African American is a human being of black dissent, while a bench is an inanimate object that people sit on.

There was a dog and a cat. What happens next? The cat's not there anymore. Neither is the dog. Can you guess what happend? The dog ate the cat, but the cat was his friend, so the dog committed suicide.

What do you get when you cross a Poodle with a cupcake? Stop looking at these anti-jokes and get back to work.

Did you know Hellen Keller had a tree house? Yeah..neither did she.

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Why was 6 afraid of seven? seven commited statitory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8, murdered nine, was sent to jail for life, let out early for community service, and told 6 he was coming forhim 6 months later.... 6 commited suicide by jumping off a cliff his body was never found his family didnt get to say good bye thats why 6 is afraid of 7

A man walked into a bar. He was meeting his friends but was 30 minutes early so he went down the road to buy some food. He had recently began dieting after watching a series of lifestyle programs which informed him of the potential risks involved with high cholesterol and blood pressure levels. He purchased a garden salad and a freshly squeezed orange juice, and made it back to the bar in time to meet his friends.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 452

Want to know how the dyslexic man with no left arm and no left leg? All left

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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