Who is the fastest man on earth? To get to the other side.

Yo Momma's sooo fat that the speed of light at her surface exceeds 3*10^8 m/s.

Why was the orphan crying? Because his parents are dead.

Whats worse than getting negative 5 on your calculus test? Coming up positive on your Chlamydia test.

hey.

One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

roses are flowers violets are too violets are purple not fuing blue

Two muffins are in an oven. How does that even work? Muffin pans come with either 6 or 12 muffin holders.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a known serial killer.

Knock Knock? Who's There? Not a Jehovah's Witness, let me in!

Why did the Jewish boy grab his groin? Because he was just circumcised.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

How did Jimmy know that his neighbor was a serial killer? He didn't... Jimmy's dead now

Haikus are awesome but sometimes they don't make sense hippopotamus

You know what happens when there's an awkward silence... Everyone feels a little bit uncomfortable for a brief moment in time.

9/11 isn't funny. 19 Muslims died that day.

Whats the difference between a duck? Yellow bills.

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? - "Robin, get in the Batmobile"

how did the fat man survive the plane crash? he didn't, he died like everyone else.

How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? 1

3 guys walk into a bar. The fourth guy ducks.

whats worse then justin beiber NOTHING

I may have Alzheimer's. But at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

A guy went to a haunted house on Friday the thirteenth… it gave him a small fright and he continued on with his day

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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