man walks into a bar and the bartender says, "you sir are gay!" The gay man says, "I take offense to that!" The bartender then replies "how may I help you."

Roses are red Violets are blue You don't want to be my valintine I'm going to shoot myself.

What do you call an asian plumber? A plumber.

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven drove two planes into the world trade center.

A guy named Dick goes into a bar and the barman says: - "hey, show my your dick" - "show you my what?" asks Dick. - "your dick!" - "oh! no, I'm shy"

Doctor: Knock knock. Patient: Whose there? Doctor: Interrupting doctor. Patient: Interrupting doc... Doctor: Your son has AIDS and will die soon.

Q. How many dead babies can you fit into a bathtub? A. That obviously depends on the size of the bathtub and each individual infant.

What did the boy with cancer get for his birthday? Roses on his tombstone.

Q: Why did the little boy have freckles? A: Heredity

Why did the girl pee her pants? She was only 1 month old...

Where did Lil' Suzie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

A blonde walks into a bar... Typical

whats black and white? a zebra

Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

What has 8 legs and 1 eye? 2 chairs and half a fish.

The feds ruined the first underground, so in order for this to not happen you joined them?

rose are red so is u want to know why because i shot her

Why did the baby cross the road? Becuz it was stapled to the chicken.

Q: What did the Lone Ranger say when he saw his horse coming? A: Here comes my horse.

Why is 6 afriad of 7? because 7 killed 8 with a pistol and is now on a killing spree.

Keep up the fun Nero!

Whats the difference between anne frank and osama bin laden? Nothing. They were both found eventually.

It was okay, then Alice my friend and a nurse insisted (she can be a total bitch) I take a painkiller, of course that messed up my focus completely and threw off my hypnotic suggestion which I use to shut down the pain receptors. Ironically I cannot seem to shut off my allergy to dust. Oh, yeah it was the standard bullshit Mensa test, ten patterns or something, oh and while I am terrible at trivia, I am actually much smarter than a fifth grader, I mean one kid told me he was smarter because he could do math better than me and he could, so I choked the little bitch to death, who is the smartest one now?

Q-Why did the little boy feel hot? A-Because he faceplanted into a bonfire.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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