What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? 12:00

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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I am hot he is not can you beleive it I got shot

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Yo mama's so fat that she should probably go on a diet to avoid the risk of getting a cardiovascular disese.

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Q: What did the Black man say to the kool ade Man? A: You're not real -BonkersLive

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Why Do Indians Not Like Snow? Because it is white and on their land

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how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? Not enough

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Why did the girl trip in the middle of the street? She tripped over the kid who dropped his ice cream because he got hit by a bus.

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What did your mom say after she went sky diving? Nothing, her parachute didn't open

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What is the diffrents between a Mexican and a elevator? one can raise children the other is a mexican!!!!!

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- I shot the sheriff! - You murderer

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question; feminists can't change anything.

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why did they bury bin laden at sea? because he died

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so... how about that airplane food

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what do you call cheese that isn't yours? cheese.

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Why did the chiken cross the road? To bite a rubarb stick.

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Their was once a man named Bob Clemens who really wanted to have sex with an underage girl. So one day he went on an online chat site to find one. He ran into this young girl and told her all the things he wanted to do to her and she told him that she had never done anything and really wanted to try it. Bob went over to her house one day and she told him to sit down and grab some cookies while she came back. She came back and Bob gave her the roughest pounding that any human being could recieve.

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What did the orphan boy get for Christmas? Exactly what he had asked for because UNICEF do a wonderful job.

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Whats worst than the world ending? Charlie Sheen Not Winning

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Q: What lives in holes? A: Jerks.

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Did you know that if you took all the elephants on earth and lined them up in space, that all the elephants would die???

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nock nock who's there? bob bob who? bob franklin let me in 'cause i'm freezing!

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Three men went into a bar; one was blind, another deaf and the third was mute. The blind guy said "Did you SEE that?" The deaf guy said "WHAT?" And the mute said "...."

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what did the man do when he was at the end of his rope? he bought more rope.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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