Why did the fat guy survive the the plane crash? He was late to get up due to a malfunctioning alarm clock and so missed his flight, sparing him of the tragic outcome the other passengers suffered. To this day he still thinks about how a completely random occurrence saved his life.

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What did the Elephant say the other Elephant? We do not know. Their vocalization is still a mystery to us.

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A Jew and a Neo-Nazi meet in a bar. They put aside their differences and enjoy a few rounds of drinks.

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what did the fish say when i threw it at the wall. Ouch. Then the world ended because it caused a ripple in the fabric of reality.

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Moby Stick, the Great White Twig

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven shot up his school and ate nine kids. Also before he was arrested he told six he was going to blow his brains out. Then he murdered the police and has been on the run ever since.

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Me: Ask me if i'm a truck. You: Are you a truck? Me: No.

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An iguana walks out of a bar

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes You should probably get yourself checked.

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That's Racist

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Her tits are so big that they would provide adequate nourishment for any future offspring.

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What did mr smith say when a student asked for math help? ok

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I work for a Jewish Carpenter. He pays me minimum wage.

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Two horses were discussing their racing records. The first said, "In my whole life I had won ten races." The second horse says, "Well, I've won twelve of those!" A greyhound trotting by chimes in, "Not bragging guys, but in my career, I've won twenty!" "Unbelievable!" exclaimed both horses. "It's a talking dog!"

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Bend Over.

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I tried frying some fish today, and it started sizzling at me. I took it as a direct threat and started yelling at the stove. Eventually it stopped and dinner was ruined, but I was proud of myself for winning.

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a man walks into a bar it hurt

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Why are black people ghetto? Because they are black.

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of lollipop? unknown.

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squirrels playing in the street=dez bryant playing tennis

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whats pink and fluffy pink fluff

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Why did the dog smile? It didn't. Humans are the only creatures on planet Earth capable of smiling, therefore, dogs are unable to smile.

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Whats the best way to get chewing gum out of your hair? Cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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