What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? Horse semen

Whats worse than having a parking cone rammed up your ass? Realizing that a big orange cone is up your ass.

Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? Because he crossed the road

Knock, Knock... Who's there An abandoned baby

Hi

Why was Uncle Monty's head damn tasty? Because he shoved it up a horses arse when it needed a shit.

Q: Whats the best part of a bald pussy? A: After you put the diaper back on you perv!

How do you kill something thats already dead? You don't. It's dead.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It heard you like to choke the chicken.

A priest, a rabbi and Santa walk into a bar. that's a highly coincidental situation.

What's the difference between a bomb and a muslim? Nothing. The difference is only apparent. At the fundamental basic building blocks of the universe, everything is made up of quarks.

Why was little Timmy so fast? Because he's tied up in the trunk of a speeding car.

What do you call something that lives in a pineapple under the sea? I don't know, but that seems like an improbable circumstance.

Whats the difference between platinum blondes? Absolutley nothing they all look exactly the same.

Why did susy give up in the corner? Cause she couldnt fight off the black man.

Jingle bells, batman smells, robin laid an egg.

What do you call a man running away from the bus? A man

A man finds a woman stumbling around on the street... So he asks sarcastically "what drugs are you on?" The lady starts crying and says "I was raped"

Why did the black man die? Because he fell off a cliff.

Why did the man with seasonal allergies not take his medication? He had liver disease...read the fine print

a chinese wompus came out of the basement.

Q. At the main menu why are there two people sad? A. Because there is.

Your mamas so fat. She fat.

What do you call 5 black people being killed in a car crash? A terrible incident

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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