When life gives you carrots, don't make carrot juice, because it's gross.

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Depends how you look at it, I like some girl, she and that girl gets along, I get along with the two girls, and yeah, I make them fight to the death as I consume the weakest one and make the new one my wife of darkness! Well, actually, threesomes, but NEVAH, NEVAR!! *shakes fist towards the skies* with another man! Now if my waifu wants to have some fun with a girl, I say why not (and then she asks if I want to join always so far), its genetics, you know, each caveman had like 600 wivus and he did not have time to bang them all, now let those genes go trough MAN for a couple of millenia, and he becomes the KING OF DEMONS... ME! Those other scumbags are a whole other story. Oh, and the 600 wivus did either go without sexytime, or you know... I mean you do KNOW that women are like comfortable naked together and yeah...

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My mom told me and my brother to clean up o te commercial...but we were watching Netflix

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A horse walks into a bar and doesnt order a drink. Because he cant.

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https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCM8MQg1bn9y38H8Irhuxx-g

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Womens Sports

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Yo mama so stupid she was trying to put her M&M's in alphabetical order

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A Boy went up to his dad and told him he was hungry. His dad then beat him to death.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jeff Oh hey Jeff, come on in

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A woman went in the kitchen and made you a sandwich.

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There was this women at a banana festival, but she didn't like bananas. So she split

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hey did you hear about Osama bin laden? He was found by the CIA and killed on account of his atrocious actions.

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Add William Wright On Facebook Answer- www.facebook.com/public/William-Wright

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squirrels with massive bonerss

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In Soviet Russia, you have no rights!

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What's a foot long and slippery A dick

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Whats worst than reading the 8th anti joke that ends with the Holocaust? The one where it ends with someone getting hit by a fridge for the 9th time.

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My gifts to my gf included: A diamond ring, a sports car, a house in malibu, a new credit card, a private jet, but most importantly, a Refrigerator.

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Roses are red Violets are blue We decapitated some little children Now I'm in jail too.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? -Because he didn't have any arms!

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so a guy says to his doctor "it hurts when i touch my leg" the doctor replies "but we cut it of last week" he promptly died with an infection in his leg

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Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

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Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

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How do you know if elephants are watching a movie? If a Volkswagen Beetle is parked outside the movie house.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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