Knock knock Who's there? I Love You! -Harrison

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting doctor. Interupting doc- You have aids.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the man answer his cell phone at 3 AM in the morning? Because his phone was ringing and was probably waiting for an important phone call

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A professor of literature asked me, "Young Sir, why are you burning those books?" I replied, "Because I need a fire to cremate the bones of your 3 sisters that I violently raped and murdered" He smirked in a witty and arrogant fashion, until raising his head and saying, "Bond, James Bond" He continued to massage his dick with his own pubic hairs before collapsing and dying

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the black person say to the white person I'm black your white

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q-"what did the carrot say to the plant" A-"nothing because neither one of these objects can talk"

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's the difference between a ferrari and a sack of babies? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what is the difference between a Ferrari and a bucket of dead babies......... I dont have a Ferrari in my garage

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it's goal was to get to the other side however unfortunately a giant gorilla picked up a car; threw it at a nearby building causing it to collapse; setting off a massive explosion causing all of the buildings on that side of the street to collapse. As the whole other side of the street was covered in rubble making it impossible for the chicken to get to the other side, so the chicken decided to turn around and go home.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

your momma's an antijoke

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How's the weather? Good.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the blonde say to the brunette? I just ate a chicken panini.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

why did suzie fall off the swing? because she had no arms.. knock, knock who's there? not suzie

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why is the apple mushy? Because a car ran over it.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

your mom is so fat jesus couldnt even lift her spirits

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: Why did the Westboro Baptist Church picket the gay marine’s funeral? A: Homosexuals are a plague sent by Satan to destroy the fabric of America.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

You know whats funny? Things that aren't listed here.

thumb_up thumb_down -117

Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the man wear his jacket because he was cold

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: What kind of file do you need to turn a 15mm hole into a 40mm hole? A: A pedophile.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q:Why does poop stink? A: it comes from butts.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops