What do you call a person trying to save his interprise from partaking in a financial collapse by binging on alcohal? An alcoholic.

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Why were the teacher's eyes crossed? She got kicked in the face by a mule.

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I began as a dreamer, then I became a visionary, then I saw my dream come true, until it shattered us all. Do you believe that perhaps, there are people out there, trying to stop the world from reaching a better age?

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Joe Paterno walks into a police station.

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What's black and hanging on a tree in my backyard? Blackberries.

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how do you make Will Smith cry? cut off his toes and fingers.

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What do you call a retarded man? Mentally challenged.

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the man the invented it doesnt want it, the man that wants it doesnt need it, and the man the needs it doesnt know it....what is it? a coffin.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because he's stupid.

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KOOKABURRA

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why did the little boy drop his icecream? he was hit by a train

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How do you know when you have had too much to drink? When you ran over 7 pedestrians and are lying in the back of a police vehicle

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Q: What happened to the teenage girl and the serial rapist at Denny's around midnight? A: They both ordered the french toast Grand Slam breakfast (at Denny's, its breakfast any time!!).

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modern love

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Two chairs were sitting there. One chair says "Could you pass me that cup?" The other chair says "Oh my God a talking chair!"

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burn baby burn your nanas burning

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Yo momma so hairy she needs to shave herself.

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What happened when the white man saw a black man running with a purse? He called the police. The police proceeded to chase the black man down tackling him into a dumpster, causing permanent spinal damage. Upon investigation into the situation, the black man was deaf and he was bringing the purse, which contained an epi-pen, to his dying wife a block away. The police officers involved were fired and sued by the family, ruining their lives. Months later they both committed suicide.

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I just made up a joke! How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Seven. The ending needs some work...

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why did the girl fall of her bike She had no arms

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Why did the Israeli military stop the helicopter raids to Gaza? They didn't. They continue them until there is nobody left.

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Why do Pelicans stand on one leg? Because if they stood on none, they'd fall over.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're allergic to flowers So this poem will kill you

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What did santa claus say when he saw a girl standing on the corner? Ho Ho Ho... ;)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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