What was Anne Frank's favorite hiding spot? She only had one, so she was unable to pick a favorite.

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a dragon walks into a bar. the bartender says "stop it". the dragon eats the bartender.

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How do you stop the London riots? - You employ a a highly effective police tactic to diffuse the crisis as quickly as possible.

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On the dora show when they asked where the Monster was why did the arrow point left instead of right?? Because it was scared

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What did the blonde say to the other blonde? What's up

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Instead of throwing out his garbage, a young boy decided to play a prank on some passersby and left a banana peel on the sidewalk. moments later an elderly woman walked past and slipped on the banana, falling backwards and smashing her head. The young man watched from the bushes as paramedics shook their heads and placed a now lifeless body in a body bag and took it away. The young boy, startled and shocked at what he just saw, tried to run away, but slipped on his own banana peel, falling backwards onto the pavement. The young boy was lucky and survived, but later had to go to therapy for many years to come, the thought of his prank gone wrong torturing him until he took his own life. What is the moral of the story? Do not litter, ALWAYS throw out your garbage.

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knock knock. who's there? doctor. doctor who? doctor: you have cancer.

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How do you stop your baby from crawling into your room? Shove a spear through its head.

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Why was the T-Rex always sad? He couldn't clap his hands.

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Why can a black man beat a white man in basketball? They are generally better at basketball Why cant a black man beat a KKK member in basketball? He valued his life and didnt want to die

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What city likes baseball the most? New York

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how did helen keller's parents punish her? stuck a plunger in the toilet

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If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, a poor african child probably has nothing and is starving to death while you and Chuck debate on how to spend your five dollars.

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Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. A number is a mathematical object used to count and measure.It is not a living thing and therefore does not possess thoughts and feelings.

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The past, the present and the future walk into a bar. It was tense.

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I saw a man lying on the floor. He was dead.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Skeletons can't move.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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What did the mentally retarded kid get in his iq test drewl

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Q: What is the difference between a potato chip and a frog? A: Neither one of them is a flower.

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Why couldn't the kid eat his vegetables? His parents stabbed him...

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the mailman delivering your weekly delivery

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A doctor walks into a bar, he stumbles backwards as he is taking his coat off, and the barman chuckles.

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PEANIS!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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