What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

person 1 - what's big, green and ugly? person 2 - don't know. what's big, green and ugly? person 1 - nothing is

If I could rearrange the letters of the alphabet.... dklaujeo bnvalue doiandkluq!!

no u

Knock knock! Who's there? Alexis. Hi, come in!

You're mother has had a heart attack in the middle of the street, you start to sing amazing grace hoping people will join in, but unfortunatly this is not a musical and you should call 911.

.....Carrot Top....

I like my 40's like I like my women, in ABUNDANCE.

What happend to the gay kid that walked into iran. He got shot and killed ????

What happens when you throw a cricket bat at a blonde? She is hurt and reports you to the police for anti-social behaviour.

A skeleton walks into a bar. It's inside a person. He orders a beer and enjoys it contentedly.

Knock Knock! Who's There? Not Steve Jobs.

Why did the koala fall off the tree? Because it was dead.

Why did the piece of gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chicken's foot.

Knock Knock Who's there? A kind hearted serial killer who will win your heart emotionally and then shoot you to death unexpectedly.

What did the farmer say when he found his tractor? "There's my tractor."

An American, a Canadian, an Afro-American and a Jew walk in a bar. They all order their favorite drink and go look for potential partners with whom they'd wish to engage in sexual relationships.

Hey, you why you say poo poo nae nae watch me whip, and do the dougie, and then happy halloween? Potato Salad

how may horses can you fit in a blender i can't remember what is red and goes 100KPH a horse in a blender

What's scarier than a ghost? Ur mum.

why didn't the black kid make the basketball team? He has cancer.

What did the kid with no arms and no legs gets for Christmas? Cancer

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says .... Hey, you shouldn't be in here; you're a big and powerful animal and any sudden movement could be dangerous for anyone around you. You have sharp hooves and we don't carry anything ergonomically designed for you to actually drink out of ... so, it's probably best that you just go ahead and get out of here. The irishman at the bar says to the bartender: Why are you talking to a horse as if it can understand you? They do not understand the spoken word and do not have the vocal chords to reply.

So there was a blond, a brunette, and a red-head. They walked out of the salon very happy with their respective dye jobs.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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