what do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you? run

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What's the difference between a jew, a muslim and a christian. They follow different belief systems

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why didn't paul ride the horse? he was busy

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Whats yellow and shaped like a banana? Bananas

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what is brown and rhymes with snoop? dr dre

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You know what is really annoying? An annoying baby that wont stop crying while you are trying to do very important work.

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Person 1 : i need to sneeze Person 2 : ok ( person 1 sneezes ) Person 2 : bless u ( few seconds later ) did u sneeze? Person 1 : yep :)

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Red are roses Blue are violets Dyslexic am I.

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If you replace all the letters in your name with G A Y it spells Gay... your gay

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white or wheat? wheat please.

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why did the asain hate his life he didn't he was living a good life with large amounts of money with a very hot wife

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What do you get when you cross a black man and a Mexican man? I don't know.

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Why was the woman bald? She was a Britney spears fan.

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The man decides to jump off the bridge and decides to make one last phone call. "Hello, Jane, this is Doug. I just wanted to let you know, from the bottom of my heart, that I love you." Person on the phone says "This is not Jane, this is Joe." "Oh, hi, Joe. Could you just tell your wife what I said. Bye." The man continues to jump down the bridge and swims with his beautiful girlfriend. They all had a great day.

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What's worse than a bruise in your knee? A bruise in your other knee. And what is worse than that? The Holocaust. And what is worse than that? A second Holocaust, much bigger, with much more casualties.

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What has 2 legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog

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Why didn't the chicken get to the other side of the road? Because chickens are in farms

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How do you make a fat kid cry? You hold an onion up to their face.

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What's a pirate's favorite letter? R, but they are also fond of the C.

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If through some strange space-time paradox, Chuck Norris ever had to fight himself, Chuck Norris would-- What am I saying, that would never happen!

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What did Jerry Sandusky get for Christmas? Raped in jail.

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ill take a bullet for you... on call of duty... nahhh that ruins my kd

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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