Why did they save the man in a burning building? To arrest him for arson.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Knock knock. Who's there? Jane from next door. Hi Jane how can I help you? Just wondering if my sister could use the spare spot on your drive tomorrow afternoon around 3pm? She is coming round for tea. I'm very sorry but my wife is due back around that time. Not a problem, thanks anyway. Have a great day. Bye Jane, see you soon, sorry again.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why did Billy die? His mother killed him.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What kind of a prediction is THAT?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

why couldnt hellen keller drive? she was a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

So, why is winter so terrible? Because, Napoleon was stopped by winter and we aren't all French.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

i have a black person in my family tree he is still hanging

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Knock knock! Ding dong.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What became of the girl who drank shellac and died? Her poor father attempted CPR for three hours straight before being forced to give up on his child's life. A massive funeral was held; everyone she ever knew attended. It was a very sad affair.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

my captcha says : forkin chickens

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What is blue and smells like red paint, Blue Paint

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Yo mamas so fat when she was standing on a scale a girl walked by and said hey thats my phone number! Yo mamas so fat she broke the family tree!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you get when you mix Catholicism and Islam? War

thumb_up thumb_down +36

why am I who i am, and you are who you are? dick spice

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? Just in case he gets a hole in one! -LEts Go Mets P.S the comment below is also very stupid

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Lebron James vs. Kobe Bryant

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why was the boy considered a bitch? His name was Jason Jubin

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Three men were lost in a desert when a genie appeared and granted them each a wish. they died of dehydration shortly afterward, never realizing they were hallucinating.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A family of black people get onto a plane. The son said to his father: "Why do planes have wings?" The father then replied by saying: "To help them fly son." The plane's wing then fell off due to a building error, then the plane crashed and everyone on board was killed.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Math Quiz! If sally was born on September 18th, 1997, how old will she be on her birthday? Leave your answers on her grave tomorrow.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's the difference between Mitt Romney and a cheese grader? How the hell should i know?

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops