Q. Did you hear about the kid napping? A. Yeah, he woke up and was grumpy

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What do you call a black man that has just gotten out of jail? A former criminal who has served his time in prison and is now trying to redeem himself by becoming a respectable member of his community

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A man dreamt that he was eating a marshmallow. He ate his dog.

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What's worse that pooping in your pants having someone see it

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What to you call a Muslim person on a plane? A passenger

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Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither, many scientists believe that the first living organisms on Earth were single-celled, prokaryotic bacteria.

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Every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes.

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- What has 2 legs and is bleeding ? - A dog cut in two.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Cement is grey, Shoes are myriad colors, but usually white, black, or brown, depending on their use, And I love you.

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what do you get a man with no arms or legs for his birthday? a quick, painless death.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van!

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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what would be the most epic fight ever chuck norris vs superman vs all legendary pokemon vs a giant who would win it me (im superman)

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So there was a jewish guy, a black guy, and a white guy all sky diving. They all had an amazing time and they all went to a bar later to talk about what they just had experienced.

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Guess what my dad got me for my birthday? NOTHING, he left my mom and I when I was a baby.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money issues and how she wanted a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man: "Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor: "You have aids"

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a chinese man and an irishman walk into a bar. This is odd because these men are from countries extremely far apart from one another

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Q: why did timmy fall over? A: he was hit by a plane

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Why did the kid stop going to school? His alarm clock broke.

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Why did Billy drop his ice-cream? He got stabbed multiple times

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What's the color of a healthy kidney. I have no f***ing idea.

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did you hear about the 2 car pile up by wal-mart? 50 mexicans dies

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I met a man today. His name was John.

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Friends, they're like food. If you eat them, they die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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