What did the southern uncle say to his nephew when he woke up? Good morning, son.

What do you call a white guy surrounded by 5 black guys? D-12.

I saw a man with a hungry look in his eye, like the kind you get from not eating for a while

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Your face Godammit!!!

Hey babe, did it hurt when the doctor cut off your umbilical cord when your mother gave birth to you. Because I have a bellybutton too!

the WNBA

Yo momma's such a whore that she violates the sanctity of marriage by sleeping with men other than her husband.

-Can I ask you one question? -Yes. -Thank you.

I have a joke Who is better, Kobe or Lebron? Kobe. But I lied, that wasn't a joke.

Roses are red violets are blue faces like yours belong in a zoo don't be mad I'll be there too not in a cage but laughing at you

What is useless and over-payed? Our government.

What's brown,green got four legs and can fall out of a tree and kill you? A snooker table.

I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road without their motives being questioned.

What do you call a larger individual having intense sex with a smaller individual? Rape.

Why didn't the blonde eat bacon? She was Jewish, and it was against her religion.

You have such a big heart (Girlfriend) The doctor's think dangerously so (Guy)

Why would Maria not have sex with Liam? Because she is Danish and doesn't shave and therefore is self-conscious

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He didn't want to.

How many times has Susie fallen off the swing? Not enough.

Why has the suicide in dentists decreased? -Due to the fact that being a dentist makes suicide redundant!

Why did the chicken cross the road? To mutilate the body of a Jewish girl that lay on the other side.

why did suzie fall off the swing? because she had no arms.. knock, knock who's there? not suzie

Why did the chicken cross the road? To go hang himself.

How do you stop a bus? Put the brakes on.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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