what is big round and fat? Your MOM

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Justin with a hat.

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Q: What is worse than The Apocalypse? A: Darkseid, Thanathos, Red Hulk, Onslaught, come on The Apocalypse cant even beat the X-men! Moral: "I AM THE APOCALYPSE, YOU ARE NOT FIT TO SURVIVE!"

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What's Brown and Sticky? A Stick

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why was the little boy sad? because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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What does Osama Bin Laden and the typical Western man have in common? Extensively modern p.o.r.n-o collections.

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Once upon a time there was a king who had a daughter. She eventually grew up and contracted aids got run over by a bus and shit her pants..

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up? She had no legs.

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Why was Timmy sad? He had 15 large cuban men slapping him for 27 hours straight.

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How are Lamborghinis and piles of dead babies alike? I don't have either in my garage. Except for the pile of dead babies.

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What do you call the black stuff in between an elephant's toes? Depending on the location of the elephant it is either dirt or it may be tar in the case of an elephant in captivity.

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Someone threw birdseed.

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There is my brain said the English man stop leaving it in the fridge and let me mug you now get in the car OK!

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why was one black guy surrounded by ten white guys...... he was a story teller.

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Knock, knock Who's there? The electrician And about bloody time too, you'd better come in.

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Ouch, a papercut .. what could be worse? A hatchet cut.

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Yo momma so pretty,she gets a lot of compliments.

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Why did the Arab bomb the US? Because it was his job.

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Why was the little boys mom watching tv in the living room? Better question why is she out of the kitchen.

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Q. Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A. Because he got shot. Q. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A. Because he was stapled to the first monkey.

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What ticks like a clock and has numbers on it? A clock.

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A man walks into a doctor's office, he pees in a cup and is diagnosed with diabetes.

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What happened to the Jewish man while he was in the shower? He accidentally fell asleep and was late to his job.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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