"knock knock" "who's there" *no answer* Opens door to find dead wife lying on doorstep with 'lol' stamped on forehead

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Wooooah! Thats literally the sound I made, anyway, can you like type the entire story in one setting, I feel weird, did you just try to hypnotize me? Anyway, are you trying to, woah, I am like high now...

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What is the least racist animal? A panda. It's black, white and Asian.

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What happened when the asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

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An African-American is working on math problems and notices an Asian man walking by. The African American asked,"Could you help me out on these math problems?" The Asian man replied, " I have never been good at math."

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Songs can be interpreted in many different ways you know: "Whenever, Wherever" - Prostitution "You raise me up" could be an advert for Viagra; And as for "love is in the air" - masturbating from a rooftop comes to mind. [L]

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You go to the Anti Joke website, what do you find under the "newest" section? Black jokes.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? A guy in mud.

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm gonna rape you with a stick

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What did the chicken say to the duck .... Nothing the chickin was Spanish and the duck was illiterate

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How do you prank a blind man? Uou leave the plunger in the toilet.

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Why is Osama bin laden so hard to find? Because he is dead.

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Why did the house burn down? Obama

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Why did the downtown New York worker never make it home? An airplane crashed into his office.

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Your mother is so stupid she never finished College thus having to work many menial jobs to provide for her family.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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A white guy, a mexican, and a black guy are in a race. Who always wins? Whichever one crosses the finish line first

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Your mother is so good in the kitchen that we all asked for a second helping.

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What do you call a person with disabilities? Names.

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Who keeps knocking on the wall? My neighbors have sex a lot.

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Wanna hear a story bout my uncle turza.... My uncle turza was eating fruit loops one day and there was a squirrel in the trre from 2 days ago he got angry because the spoon was from the phillipines so he punched a whole in the wall and his half uncle cousins sister had a cage.... True story

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If roses weren't RED and violets weren't Blue... Walls are still solid objects.

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your mom is so stupid that she is suffering from down's syndrome, and has a shorter life expectancy than normal people.

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teacher:humpty dumpty sat on a wall.... me: wait, why was he up there ms.park? teacher: well hes never been the same since vietnam, his wife divorced him and now hes a raging alcoholic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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