Friends are like potato, when you eat them die.

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"I just don't understand the difference between yours and mines." "Well, you see, yours belong to you, whereas mines explode when you step on them."

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Why did the bear fall down? I shot it. Why did the second bear fall down? It tripped over the first one.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What do you get when you cross a cat and a dog? an email from PETA

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Why are Asians such bad drivers? They're not: it is a racist stereotype that is propagated by people who are so insecure that they must put others down to feel good about themselves.

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Why did the man tell the other man to shut up? The other man said something that made this particular man mad which drove him to tell the other man to shut up.

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School

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What did the man with no arms say to the jewish man? I have no arms.

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What if I told you.....potatoe

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What is a bull like in a China Shop? Calm, because generally any bull you would find in a China shop is probably made out of porcelain.

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whats up with the irish jokes? Honestly im not a alcoholic so all of you can go F*** yourselfs...

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What's old and wrinkly? old people

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Why did the boy drop the ice cream? Because he had a seizure.

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What did the black man do in the Italian Pub? He gave a 20% tip and couldn't have been more courteous.

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Your mom is so fat, she had liposuction.

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Roses are red Violets are actually purple You should probably see an eye doctor.

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Why did they save the man in a burning building? To arrest him for arson.

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What happened to the boy who tried to cross the road? He got hit by a semi-truck and died.

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Other Guy: What are you looking at? Me: You.

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Whats black and cant read white paper? An African

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what did the dog eat for dinner? food.

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was blind.

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Roses are red Violets are red The grass is red OH MY GOD, THERE'S BLOOD EVERYWHERE!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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