How many dead babies does it take to fill a bathtub? 17

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Why did Jerry Sandusky rape little boys? Because his penis was hard and he needed to get his nut off quick

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How do you kill a blonde? You stab her.

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why did the geman man hit the jewish man? because the jewish man swung a punch at the german man so it was an act of self defense.

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My grandma told me to always keep my head up and just keep going. She fell down a manhole last week and died.

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Yock

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What is white, long, and thin? A tablecloth

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What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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How many ADHD kids does it take to change a light bulb? Let's go ride our bikes!

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Why are soccer players sad? They couldn't play Football.

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Women. Can't live with them. Can't systemically murder them without compromising the reproductive integrity of the species.

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What do you call a man with short legs? Whatever his name is

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Why did Poppy lose at sports day? Because she had a heart attack and died.

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What happens when you forget your parachute as you jump out of a plane? You wake up.

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is this the krusty krab? no this is smooth lobster.

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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Who wakes up in the morning feeling like P. Diddy? P. Diddy.

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What is rectangular, white and has two wheels? A limo getting its wheels replaced.

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A man walks into a bar and says, "Hey, Jim, your wife just died from terminal cancer." Jim then says, "Cool. Hey, do you know if the games on tonight?"

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck could chuck as much wood as a wood chuck would if a wood chuck could chuck wood.

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What did the little boy say to Micheal Jackson? Shouldn't you be dead?

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I find Holocaust jokes hilarious, Anne Frankly I know a few...

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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What do old people break when they fight? A sweat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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