If a tree falls on a woman and there is no one around to hear it, she was probably lonely.

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Why did the Jew go to prison. He slaughtered his family.

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Why does Toby suck! Because he sucks!

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why did the man steal change from the tip jar? he wanted another state quarter for his collection

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How many chickens did Moses bring to the ark? 2

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What did the piece of macaroni say as they boy was about to eat him? Nothing. Foods are uneducated and illiterate therefore unable to speak, and went into the boy's mouth without a trouble.

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What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after his operation.

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Did you hear about the one about the man who walked into the library? He likes reading

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I'm getting sick of holocaust jokes can't you Nazi Anne Frankly I'm sick of it

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Three Lawyers are walking, one falls down, gets up and continues walking

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Why do black people like kool aid? Why It is a very hydrating and delicious drink

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What is a dead cat on the side of the road. A free cat.

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Why did the duck cross the road? Hurricane Katrina

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What did the mute guy say to the deaf guy? Nothing. He can't talk, just makes awful noises and hand gestures.

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What's the difference between Santa clause and the Jews? Santa goes down the chimney

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A man with glasses and a cane walks out if a clothing store and accidentally bumps into a woman, knocking his hat off "Can't you watch where you're going?" the woman asks. The man then slaps her, knocking her to the ground. He picks up his new designer fedora, and drives off in his $90,000 Cadillac. The woman, after dusting herself off, gets the guy's plates, convinces a few witnesses to testify against the man, and informs the authorities of an assault. He was later arrested for assault as well as pimping and soliciting sex. He is found guilty in a court of law and is sentenced to 2-5 years in prison, and is doled a hefty fine.

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whats black and doesnt work? a broken black toaster

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Did you know, even though penguins ARE birds... They don't live in volcanoes?

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Q:what's worse than eating outdated raviolis? A:terminal cancer.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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Dani Barton is not that! She is a great girl with a strong heart and feelings. The statement below is a joke, hence why it was published on AntiJokes. This is NOT a joke however.

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If Oscar Meyer had a dog what kind of dog would it be? A Wiener Dog!!

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Yo mama so stupid that she was tested and found to be mentally retarded.

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YOUR MOMMA IS SO FAT WHEN SHE JUMPED FOR JOY........she didn't get stuck because there's nothing to get stuck in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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