Roses are cheap Violets are on sale It's Boxing Day Please buy my flowers I really need the cash.

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what is 6.9? a good thing ruined by a period

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how do you kill a zombie? Zombies arent real.

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do you have snow in your vagina? because i am going to plow you

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Q:Why do you never run over black guy on a bicycle A: Because that is not a very nice thing to do

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Holy fuckfarts! I did mention I am at my mothers place right? What am I saying? What am I typing? Marry me now!

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What is green, slimy and has 8 legs? Uncle Martin

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What Can't You See and Stinks A Fart.

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what goes up and down , and left and right all day without breaking a sweat? A compass, get your mind out of the gudder.

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Q: Why were minorities denied access to the bathroom? A: It was for employees only.

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A duck walks into a bar, clearly ignoring the 'No Ducks Allowed' sign that had been placed in the window to prevent comedic scenarios.

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Q: What do you call a Mexican who gets his car stolen. A: Pablo

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The Oakland Raiders

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How do you make a builder sad? You shit on his bricks.

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I was born.

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? Well it depends how many of them can figure out the staircase.

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Bake until golden at 375

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What is brown and smells bad? A white person that had been bathed in brown paint, and didn't shower for the next month, and rubbed poop all over them, and rubbed diarrhea all over them and rubbed rock poop all over them and rubbed pee all over them, and rubbed mud all over them, and pooped in a bottle.

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Why did Susy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? NOT SUSY!

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If you know someone with the last name Schmidt. ALWAYS ask him to take a Schmidt on your chest

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A guy walks into a bar. He now has a broken collar bone.

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what is the worst thing in the galaxy? runing out of dr.pepper :(

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a bald man walks into a hairdressers and demands beans on toast.

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bergin y u so tubbbbbyyyy?????

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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