why was the hobo sad his box was confiscated

Bill is walking down the street when a girl who had a crush on him 20 years ago sees him, goes up to him, and says, "I think I know you, what is your name?". Bill says, "Timmy," and keeps walking because he is an asshole.

Why did the Jew pick up the penny lying on the sidewalk? Because he dropped it.

Q. Why did the woman fall out of the tree? A. Cause she got laid

I believe you, if something is possible, I know you can do it. I tried lucid dreaming once, but I felt like I began floating and that was no fun, scared me. I am pretty good at hypnotizing others, myself not so much.

A man questions wether a cat will always land on it's feet. He takes a cat from a pet store and tosses it into the air. The cat lands on it's feet. Startled, the cat runs into the street and gets hit by a car. The man goes to prison for theft and animal abuse.

What did the Wife say to her husband about his Erectile Dysfunction? - Im sorry I dont know how to finish a joke based on this private a matter.

A man walks into a bar. He says ouch.

Two black men and a latino board a plane together. They are members of the Marshall High School football team, and all die in the subsequent crash.

How many pancakes do you need to reach a 2.5m roof? Purple, because aliens don't fly

God is almighty, as such he ANSWERS TO NO ONE! Moral: What you praying for then bitch?

An Irishman, a Zimbabwean and a South African walk into a bar... oh wait, it's just the English cricket team.

Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally!

baskets

A dyslexic blind man walks into the bartender behind the bra

roses are red violets are blue some poems are good and some don't

My brother and I laugh at how competitive we used to be. But I laugh harder

ballsack

Whats the difference between cake and dead babies? Cakes make people happy while dead babies are a sad and disturbing sight to see.

What do you call a dog with 2 legs? Doesn't matter, it's not going to come anyways.

Hey, I just met you. Nice to meet you.

What do you call Charlie Sheen when he's on drugs? Charlie Sheen.

Where did Sudie go during the bombing? Everywhere.

A boy got scratched by a dog and nearly killed him. When he grew up, a dog came running up to him and started biting and scratching him till he couldn't handle it. Then a plane crashed into him and he died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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