how do you kill justin bieber? put a bag over his head and suffercate him.

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How did Sarah Palin see Russia from her house? She didn't.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it's a chicken and it doesn't know any better. It probably doesn't know where it is much less where it's going.

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What's worse than having embaracing parents? A: they are of the same sex

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126

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i love antijokes

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Why didn't Suzie ride her bike? Suzie's mother aborded her. She was never born.

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Why did the dog in Detroit die in the street? It was stabbed.

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face?" the man replies, "my wife has terminal cancer and has been given 2 weeks to live."

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How do you make a baby float? Two scopes of Ice cream and two scopes of baby.....and the holocaust.

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Why did the man lose the a race? 'Cause he has no legs

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Antijokes...

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where do you get virgin wool from? ugly sheep.

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What do you call a black man with a PhD.? A Doctor! What are you, racist?

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because his work office was there and if he had not crossed, he would have had to get back in his car and parked in the company parking space therefore taking more time and costing a small but significant amount of money

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Why didn't the monkey cross the road? He saw the chicken get run over.

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What do you get when you put a baby in a blender New Doritos Dip

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Why doesnt snow like Asians? Snow is a form of precipitation within the Earth's atmosphere in the form of crystalline water ice, consisting of a multitude of snowflakes that fall from clouds. Since snow is composed of small ice particles, it is a granular material. It has an open and therefore soft structure, unless packed by external pressure. Snowflakes come in a variety of sizes and shapes. Types which fall in the form of a ball due to melting and refreezing, rather than a flake, are known as graupel, ice pellets or snow grains. Therefore since snow is unhuman they are then thus incapable of emotions because they lack any vitals organs.

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(insert Anti-Joke here)

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Roses are red, violets are blue. You're dog is dead. And so is your family.

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Q: How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? A: 2 in the front, 3 in the back and 95 in the ash tray.

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Roses and red, Violets are blue, This type of poem, Must always rhyme.

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You bumder!

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Why is a charlie horse called a charlie horse? Well there was this boy charlie and he had a horse and it died in a fire.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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