LET'S PLAY CARDS SHUFFLE THE DECK *person with a deck-patio* no please don't

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is one similarity between John Samos, and the dreadful clown? they have a red nose and are payed to be funny, aside from John Samos!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm gonna screw you and you don't have a clue !

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

I'm Ryan Dunn, and this is a 120mph car crash

thumb_up thumb_down -26

what will hit the ground first an apple or Obama The apple, obama was stopped by a rope

thumb_up thumb_down -7

roses are red so are the jews every one loved that holocaust news

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker face pa pa poker face!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

JLo made a song about my diick- "On the Floor"

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What do you call a man with a seagull on his head? Whatever his name happens to be.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How did the lawyer survive the airplane crash? He didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A black man hailed a taxi cab. He got in, and the taxi drove him to his destination for an appropriate fee.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

why does the pie have apples in it? it was apple pie.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

5 black men walk into a 7-11 at midnight. They clog the all of the toilets in the mens bathroom causing them to over run.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How do you confuse a blonde? Go up to her and say, "The bookbag coffeepotted the ice cream wedding! Is it gosling for you to rectify this pane of glass and oceans? I won't be able to berry a giant squid before the cows arrive."

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down, broke his crown, sued the water company, bought a huge settlement and ran off with that slut Little Bo Peep.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

If there are 50 oranges and 50 waffles tied to a fence post. How many cow utters does it take to shit green? urine.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Student: This guy is bothering me! Teacher: And you expect me to do something about it?

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A dog is walking down the street. The dog catcher promptly arrives and takes him to the pound. Two months later the dog is in a new, happy home with a wonderful family.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

LIFE :(

thumb_up thumb_down -3

sometimes josh roberts sees how many things he can get in his bumhole befor is starts to bleed.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Yo momma so fat, when she sits on a rainbow nothing happens, as rainbows are merely rays of light refracted off of water particles in the air, apparent to humans only on a visible spectrum.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A preposition is a bad thing to end a sentence with.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: What did the boy say to the girl? A: Wanna go to homecoming?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops