Asian son: "I'm using a calculator for my math" Asian mother: "Why not you calculatnow!"

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why did the woman cross the road? to get to her full time job as a lawyer.

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my rhyme is sicker than the holocaust

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A talent agency is giving auditions and is just about to rap it up when a family shows up. They reluctantly agree to their "brief" audition given that they had found no suitable talent that day. The routine starts with the father starting 6 chainsaws at once while simultaneously starting a juggling/lumberjacking routine. His beautiful wife proceeds to toss him additional chainsaws (as he continually throws them for dramatic effect) while also maintaining a hypnotizing dance which seems to drain your desire to leave from your very soul. The children take turns jumping in between the chainsaws while doing a silent replay of the movie, "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon." After it plays out the father tosses the final chainsaw up in the air which lands standing straight, quivering in the dust of the studio. The studio manager says, "Why that's an AMAZING act!! I'll sign you right now! What do you call your act?" In response to which, the father ****s on his desk.

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Why didnt Santa give the little Girl her Pony? Santas not real.

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What did John say to Trojan? Hi Trojan

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Kevin and Ramin

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Why do black people have white hands? Palms and soles are not in direct sunlight, and therefore less amounts of melanin are produced in those regions.

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Knock knock whos there? Its me, your doorbell is obviously broken Okay, hold on a sec. Please hurry up, its really cold I cant seem to find my key Its probably on the coffeetable, where you always keep it. No, its not there Check the floor underneith Oh, right, there it is.

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How do you trick the devil? You give him a ginger.

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why did the black guy kill the white guy. the white guy killed his family.

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Two polar bears were sitting in a bathtub. One said to the other, "Could you pass the saop?". The other say, "What do you think I am, a typewriter?".

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a potato a chicken and a rooster ate a cat and you just wasted your time

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Why were the babies used for target practice? Hitler demanded the Nazis to do so.

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A man died.

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A man walks into a haunted house and screams. He had arrows on a nail.

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What happens if someones forgets to put the 'anti' next to 'joke.' It is taken by someone else and created into an anti Joke.

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Whats black, white, and red all over? a dead panda.

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Did you fall on your head when you were a baby Oh, Im very sorry.

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why did phil ruin the patio furniture? because he wasnt familiar with the grammar technique used

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Your mother is a man.

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Why was the dog fallowing the fat guy. The fat guy said come.

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How many Chinese people does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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knock knock who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill Smith, we went to high school together. Oh hey Bill, come on in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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