- Anti Joke

What did the black man do in the Italian Pub? He gave a 20% tip and couldn't have been more courteous.

Your mom is so fat, she had liposuction.

Roses are red Violets are actually purple You should probably see an eye doctor.

Why did they save the man in a burning building? To arrest him for arson.

What happened to the boy who tried to cross the road? He got hit by a semi-truck and died.

Other Guy: What are you looking at? Me: You.

Whats black and cant read white paper? An African

what did the dog eat for dinner? food.

Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was blind.

Roses are red Violets are red The grass is red OH MY GOD, THERE'S BLOOD EVERYWHERE!!!

A man tells the bartender," A bar walks into a man..." The bartender says," What the hell? I think you've had enough"

What did the man say to the woman? get back in the kitchen and make me a sandwich.

Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

Why is there no aspirin in the jungle? Because aspirin is a man-made drug derived from salicylic acid, and it it is this that is extracted from willow bark, which used to be used by Cherokee Americans as a fever-reducer and pain-reliever.

what did the catholic priest say to the little boy? -probably something about god or jesus because they are in church

Have you ever just woken up one day and thought, "I don't wanna wear pants today."

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What happens when an Asian with a boner walks into a wall? He breaks his nose

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

A- knock knock B- whose there? A- Chuck Norris B- chuck norris who? A- are you retarded?

Want to hear a joke? 12 year olds

Jayden Eccles

Why didn't Rebecca Black take the bus? Because she would have had a heart attack with all of the seat choices.

How did the woman get pregnant? She was thrown into a pool filled with semen.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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