Why did michael jackson wear white gloves around young boys? His doctor recommended that he do so due to bad circulation.

What did the chicken say when it crossed the road? Nothing. Chickens can't talk.

Whats worse then getting caught in the rain with no umbrella? Aids.

Kid walks into principals office Principal: do you know why I called you down here. Kid: yeah, I punched a kid at lunch. Principal: that's not why I called you down here

A little boy walks up to his father and asks his father to explain the birds and bees. The father then proceeds to rape the little boy.

Q. What did the buddhist monk say to the hotdog vendor? A. "I'd like a hotdog, please."

Q: What should you do when life gives you lemons? A: Life would never really give you lemons...

If she's old enough to count, she's probably in second grade.

Is this the krusty Crab? No you idiot this is a phone!!!!!

Q: Why did George Lopez walk into a Taco Bell? A: To purchase a 5-layer Gordita Burrito

what did batman say to robin? get in the car

How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Jupiter is the Galaxys biggest planet!

Knock Knock. Who's There? Billy. Oh, come on in. You could have just knocked on my door or rang doorbell without saying "Knock Knock" though, that's kind of childish.

Why did the farmer's wife leave the farm? Because she was a lesbian.

why did matt daly shit his pants? he had downs

"Everyone be very quite. Dont say a word or well get eaten by the big, fat stupid ugly fat faced dinosaur in that cave over there." "A word or well get eaten by the big fat stupid ugly fat faced dinosaur in that cave over there." "Look how clever Charles is now were all screwed."

Why did my phone crack? I dropped it.

Whats black, white, and red all over? Hot sauce on a checkerboard.

What is funnier than a dead baby? almost everything. there is nothing funny about a dead baby.

Q:Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A:Sea creatures seeking shelter and food

How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

What do you call a black man on the moon - A Problem What do you call 5 black men on the moon - A Bigger Problem What do you call every black person on the moon - Problem Solved!

why did the blonde get caught shop lifting? she wasnt a very good theif

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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