Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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Always put punctuation at the end of your sentence

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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What does a eagle and a bunny have in common.. nothing they're two different animals.

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A horse walks into a bar and sits down on a stool. He orders a beer. He drinks his beer and leaves. Life continues on as it was.

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If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat? Depends. Some are vegetarians or vegans, while most eat a mixture of vegetables and meat.

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If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Deteriorate

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Why did the cook put rubber bands in the spaghetti Because he was an asshole

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What is worst than a black guy hanging on a tree. A burnt black guy hanging on a tree

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Knock Knock Who’s there? Wolf Wolf who? Wolf who!? Is that really the first question that comes to mind when confronted with a talking wolf?

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Many people of many races do many things every day.

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What did the retarded guy say to the other retaarded guy? A. Your retarded

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what's magenta and has 7 legs? nothing.

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Why can't kids do drugs in school? Because it's against the rules.

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What could be happier than a fat guy eating 20 pies? The guy he bought it from!

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What did the racist southerner say to the snide lawyer? "I have AIDS."

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What is blue and feels like fluff? Blue fluff

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How could problems have been avoided in the old west? Bigger towns

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Bob: If two negatives make a positive, what would be an anti-anti-joke? Tim: An anti-joke

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Why Did the man Commit suicide? His body used cellular respiration to make ATP (A form of energy) and his body used it to send electrical signals to his index finger to pull the trigger on his .357 Magnum, thus putting a bullet through the soft tissue in his brain causing his body to shut down Imediately!

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400 asian people walked in a bar

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My daughter got a kinder surprise with cool toy today..... i killed her i didnt even want the toy

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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