I have a knock knock joke. You go first.

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How can you tell if a woman is a man? If she has a penis

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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Why was the crazy person allowed to leave the asylum? The ombusman's report will be on your desk this morning minister.

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What do you call a man who interru- SHUT UP!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody actually knows this because the chicken could not tell us why he/she crossed the road so it would be nearly impossible to get the answer.

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What's worse than seeing Helen Keller behind the wheel of a car? Being run over by Helen Keller.

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Q: What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? A: Names

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What did the Macedonian guy say to the Croatian guy? Both of our countries are from the former Yugoslavia.

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An African American walks into a bar. The bar tender is a racist, so he asks the African American gentleman to leave.

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what did the homeless man get for Christmas? Cancer

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A black man walked into a bar. He cashed in big on workers comp.

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Why so serious ?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Oh, I thought you could tell me. I will ask someone else. See you later.

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Whats worse than Lindsey Lohans vagina? Nothing.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun, Get in the van.

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What is the unltimate Jewish dilemma? Free pork

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? I don't cum on my watermelon before I eat it.

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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Pitbull is Mr. Worldwide because his music sucks everywhere in the world

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a rabbi,a priest and minister didnt walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

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How do chinese name their kids? They drop silverware

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Why couldn't the married couple have sex? They were lesbians who were saving up a sex change.

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Q: What do you call black guys running down a hill? A: Black guys running down a hill.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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