Knock Knock. Who's there? God. God Who? ::Apocalypse follows::

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A man walks into a bar. Jeremy Lin congratulates him for being a person.

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Teacher: Maria please point to America on the map. Maria: This is it. Teacher: Well done. Now class, who found America? Class: Maria did.

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You wanna know something that doesn't exist? Grandma's.........that haven't given BLOW JOBS!

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King Triton: "As much as it pains me to lose you, Ariel, I want you to be happy with your prince..." Ariel: "So why don't you just turn Eric into a merman?" King Triton: "Good idea."

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muffled-thud muffled thud who's there? Jeremy Beadle.

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whats the difference between a dead baby and a trampoline? I take my shoes off to jump on the trampoline

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why does my ass hurt? you have rectal cancer

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Why did the monkey fall out the tree? Because he was dead.

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Why was the teen boy shirtless? He was mauled by tigers.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a convicted rapist.

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What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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Sure, if my waifu aproves, hell, the more the hornier. CONDOMS? ARE YOU INSANE? CONDOMS ARE FOR PUSSIES... ..:WHIIIIIICH sorta makes sense so okay, my for a moment I thought you where not gonna go trough with this... Nah just kidding, I already got you, now if you want to break free I am gonna be like "MEH!" So, uh, you shaven or not? Please dont be "trimmed", sometimes it just looks like a pussy with a mustachio, thats bullshit.

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knock knock whos there your mother open the door

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Why did the boy spill his lemonade? He was attacked by ravage dogs.

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in·fun·dib·u·lum? 1. a funnel-shaped organ or part. 2. a funnel-shaped extension of the hypothalamus connecting the pituitary gland to the base of the brain. 3. a space in the right ventricle at the base of the pulmonary artery.

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2 men shot up a morgue, 16 bodies remain dead

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, He has died, And now will you,

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So 2 black guys walk into a bar and the bartender looks around and say "what will you fine gentlemen have?" and they order and payed their tab and could not have been more courteous, amirite?

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What do I do with all the wheelchairs after I boil all the vegetables?

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What kind of gun cant shoot bullets Hand guns

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I'm going to rewrite history. History.

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what happens when you mix a black guy and a Mexican? nothing, it is physically impossible to "mix" people.

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This is a stupid joke. Get it to the top of the list and Kobe Bryant will pass to you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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