At home, 3:20 pm - Close eyes for 10 mins, it's 3:30. At school, 3:20 pm - Close eyes for 20 mins, it's 3:40 and schools been finished for ten minutes.

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IM SEXY AND I KNOW IT Chrysanthemums are pretty but toads and people are damn to horny

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roses are red violets are blue im in class

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How many jews can you fit in a car? However many seats there are

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What has 14 eyes, 14 legs, 70 toes and 7 noses... 7 people.

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What's a Mexican's favorite sport? It varies from person to person.

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roses are red violets are blue i had sex with your dog

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Your mother is so ugly that she looks like you.. :)

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What's the difference between a woman and a cat? Numerous things

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why was the boy laying on the ground? he got shot in the head

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Why did the man slowly cross the road? He had a prosthetic leg.

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If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Digress

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A. Why did the chicken cross the road? B. Why? A. To get to the other side. A. Knock, Knock. B. Who's there? A. The chicken.

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A Catholic priest has the choice between spending an hour with a young girl or a young boy. Which does he choose? Neither because that's illegal and completely immoral for a priest.

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Knock knock Who's there Fetty Fetty who? Fetty Wap Hey what's up hello

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why did the man turn on and off the lights 20 times because he was diagnosed with O.C.D as a child

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the black person

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the police there was several calls from people in the sarounding area who heard screaming from ur basement

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Woman rights.

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a man walk into a bakery, he sais... may i have a loaf of bread....

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Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van

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What the difference between water and water? Nothing, they're both water.

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Why did the baby boy start crying? He got hit with a toaster

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops