what did the 3 year old get for her birthday? nothing she died of terminal cancer at the age of 2

Your mother is so fat, that somebody should inform her of the risks of eating unhealthy foods because she could obtain life threatening diseases.

Why wasn't the chicken able to cross the road? Because it was disabled.

What would be a good feature for this site? A search by keyword feature. (sorry...)

Whats worse tan finding a worm in your apple? Being touched by Michael Jackson

Q. Why did the dinosaur cross the road? A. Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.

What do you call a black man driving a car? A driver.

Student: May i go to the toilet? Teacher: What for? Student: To open the chamber of secrets!

Why did Hellen Keller drive off of the cliff? Because she is a woman.

What do you call a black priest? Holy shit.

Why was the clock off? Because it was broken

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

A Russian drinking something other than vodka.

A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

What is the hardest part of a vegetable? The wheelchair.

What did the hispanic say to the black guy? I'm not sure. I wasn't listening because eavesdropping is rude.

What's worse than the holocaust? Another holocaust.

Bumper Sticker: I Brake for Stop Signs

Knock, knock. Who's there? Bailiffs.

they're dead. idiot.

Yo mama is so fat, she lost in a race to a person who had less physical mass.

There are 2 kinds of people in this world... 1.Those who need closure.

what did the robot say to the centipede. Stop being a centipede!!!! Its funny because robots have arms.

Yeah, "master hypnotists" (and do not even get me started on hypnotherapists, they completely suck!) keep claiming that you need to keep up to date with the "constantly developing art of hypnosis" The thing is though, that hypnosis does not develop itself, people develop it further, and when the key ingredient is actually believing things under a certain state, you can do anything, even slow the passage of time to a halt. Once I tried that, I was disappointed when I figured out that it did not work, so I went shopping (for groceries), then realized that no time had passed at all, sounds like bullshit, and yeah I wont be trying that again anytime soon, lucid dreaming is good enough, you can spend hours and hours in a lucid dream state, days, and then wake up and figure out you slept like two hours or something.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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