What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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Yeah, and speaking about spiderman, I got some weird senses, when I get stressed things begin seeming slower, and gets a weird blur effect, not sure what it is, but if you know what "bullet hell video games are" Technically games where you play as a tiny spaceship and lots of bullets fly around, I was always awesome at those games as a kid, because the more stress I felt while playing, the slower my perception of time felt.

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't a Ferrari in my garage

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Why did the woman walk into the men's clothing store? She's a lesbian. Why did the man walk into the womens clothing store? He had to buy his mom a birthday present.

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What Mary short for? Due to the fact she has no legs, on account of the flesh eating she contracted after a visit to argentina thanks to the make-a-wish foundation. Mary also has cancer

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What did the man say to the orphan? No one loves you, you have no friends.

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How did the square become a circle? Due to the period of recession in our nation, it was found necessary to cut corners.

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Why did the bus crash? What, you were expecting an answer? I was asking you

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why did simran go to jessicas house? To go have a human taco

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What comes to mind when you say the word "Mind?" Your Mind

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What do you get if you cross a Sheep with a Kangeroo. An abomination unto God.

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A man walks up to a gay guy and says "you are socially accepted"

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An asian, mexican, and a black guy walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "get the hell out"

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What do birds need when they are sick? Most wild animals die when they are sick. However, they can sometimes be nursed back to health with special food and electrolyte solutions in special animal rehabilitation centres.

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Situation. A man trying to find meaning in his life. Question. Why are desieses not colorful, and tasty. Answer. Adolf Hitler and his ice cream songs that he sings on sunday mornings during brunches.

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I had a quad when I was in high school, she was pretty but it was hard to get her out of the wheelchair.

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the awkward moment when a sentence doesnt end the way you think it octopus

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Q: Why do homeless people smell bad? A: Because they live on the street and they dont take showers it's very sad sometimes.

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It's like they always say, you get what you pay for. Unless your a woman, then you get what other men pay for.

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What did one direction do? Nothing, their music is written by someone else they don't use whatever talent they have and they sound I million dying kittens.

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Q. What did the fat guy get for his birthday? A. diabetes

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How do you drown a blonde? Tie a cinderblock to her foot and throw her in water.

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How do you tell if an elephant has been in your refrigerator? You find someone you trust and say "an elephant has been in my refrigerator".

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Why was the asian boy get straight A's? He paid attention during class, took good notes, studied at home, and had a personal drive that lead him to be a good student.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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