ROSE ARE BROWN VIOLETS ARE BROWN WHO SH*IT IN MY GARDEN!!!!!

Knock Knock Who’s there? Tom Tom who? Tom Pearson? Oh Tom, I wasn’t expecting you til 3pm, please come in.

What do Jesus, The Easter Bunny, and Santa Claus all have in common? Their middle names are all Larry.

whats the difference between a black guy and pizza? a pizza can feed a family.

What do you call a homeless man in Beverly Hills? Charles, Someone who unfortunately had to drop out of school at a young age to work to support his dying mother. Hence, later in life, after his mother died, lacked the education to be enrolled in college forcing him to pimp to make enough money to eat and pay for the rent in his one bedroom appartment in his hometown-Mississippi. But times were tough in Mississippi and not many people could afford a whore. This forces him to go all the way to California where he found more people there were willing to pay for a whore. Business was good and soon enough he had enough money for a decent condo. But Charles still morned the death of his mother. Eventually he couldn't take the daily pressure of being a pimp and thought of his mothers death, so he turned to heroin. Soon all his money was fueling his addiction and before he knew it he was on the street, with no one to help him and no where's to go. Every night he goes to sleep on his cardboard box with the memory of his late mother in the back of his head. Sometimes Charles wonders what he could of been if he didn't drop out of school, but he knows that what he did was the right thing.

What's the difference between 15 dead babies and a cadilac? I don't have a cadilac.

What is Mary short for? She has no legs.

Do you know what will hurt? Getting hurt.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because no cars were coming.

Pigachu is a Porkemon.

What is blue and has wheels? Grass- I lied about the colour and the wheels.

What's puby and dandruffy? Aodhan Hearty

Does your face hurt? Because if it does, you might want to see a doctor.

how do you upset a black guy kill his family :)

What green and has wheels? grass I lied about the wheels

How do you sink a Polish submarine? Hit it with a torpedo.

asd

What's worse than Patrick in a blender. Uuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, idk.

Why is a charlie horse called a charlie horse? Well there was this boy charlie and he had a horse and it died in a fire.

Amedeo Clemente Modigliani was an Italian artist who worked mainly in France. Primarily a figurative artist, he became known for paintings and sculptures in a modern style characterized by mask-like faces and elongation of form. He died in Paris of tubercular meningitis, exacerbated by poverty, overwork, and addiction to alcohol and narcotics.

whats a dick a dick

if life gives you lemons...chuck them back and say i wanted muffins instead!!!!

"Do you wanna hear a funny joke?" Yeah, Sure! "A funny joke."

What is the secret to winning football games? Score the most points.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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