What do you call an Englishman, an Irishman and a Chineseman playing football? 3 friends playing their favourite sport.

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how do you wake up lady gaga poke her face

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Why do you walk to your bed at night? Beds cant walk.

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A man wearing dark sunglasses walks into a convenience store with a dog on a leash. He goes to the middle of the store, and he starts swinging the dog around over his head by the leash. The store clerk comes over and asks, "what are you doing?" The man replies, "Ajiohskdcojqpowuskncvlkzb" Not knowing what else to do, the clerk calls 911. It turns out the man's name is Ruprict, and he has escaped from the local mental institution. A police officer shortly arrives to bring Ruprict back to the hospital.

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What was sandusky's role at penn state turned tight ends into wide receivers

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Whats the difference between a monkey and a baby? Eating a baby tastes better with saltines.

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Sorry babe, even if I was I would not tell you, the entire place is surrounded, but within enough of a distance, so we will plant a nice setup around the green shack so everyone assumes his deal was some solo operation, if someone else is heading at his direction now, you are gonna get busted, so you better stay down.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Whose. There? Not Susie.

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''Hey, this is absolutely true. There's an organization now called 'Draft Dick Cheney for President, 2012.' Yeah. Good luck with that. They tried to draft Dick Cheney five times during Vietnam. That didn't work.

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Do you want to hear a good anti-joke? Well I don't have one.

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butt sex

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Q. How many lemons does one person take to fill a ladder? A. Fish

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Where do you send a Jew with ADD? A concentration camp.

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how do you get a man with a gun out of your house? you don't.

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ginger

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roses are red violets are blue the thing in the toilet reminds me of you :)

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There was once a family of tomatoes. A daddy tomato a mommy tomato and a baby tomato. they decided one day to take a walk. but the baby was taking forever so the daddy tomato walked back STOMPED on him and yelled "CATCHUP"

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Parents are very similar to trees. They fall over when hit repeatedly with an ax.

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Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. A number is a mathematical object used to count and measure.It is not a living thing and therefore does not possess thoughts and feelings.

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What do you get when you cross a Mexican and an African? A baby.

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There once was a man in Peru, Who dreamt he was eating his shoe. He was promptly taken to the hospital but died from infection.

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Why doesn't Julius Caesar answer his cell phone? Because he's DEAD.

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What would u like to drink?

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Roses are red violets are green i can't rhyme bridge

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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