You should get a new joke book............ because the newest edition has just be released

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A man walked into a bar making it immediately apparent that he had no future in competitive limbo.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Your mamas so fat, that any level of physical exercise is strenuous, but also mentally challenging, as she feels that there is a negative astigmatism attached to sweaty, red-faced overweight individuals trying to burn those pounds. This in turn makes her ashamed of the gastronomically decadent life she once lived, and so she doesn't have the confidence to try and reverse the damage she did during those insecure teenage years, instead comforting herself with the sugary, fatty bane of her life. She therefore lives in a vicious circle, angry at herself and the society that won't accept her. But remaining incredibly, repulsively fat.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

your mom is so fat, she stepped on the scale and said, "I really need to eat better and I'm thinking about getting a gym membership." She did so, and she lost so much weight that all her friends congratulated her everywhere she went, and some didn't even recognize her.

thumb_up thumb_down -49

we all know sammi has a penis

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Knock Knock *opens the door*

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What does Chuck Norris do when he breaks his legs? he calls a doctor.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

And now a word from our sponsors

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Did you hear about the guy with five penises? Me neither, because that sounds like a very improbable aberration.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's big and white?

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's black and can't swim? A black shirt.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How do you call a hispanic man crossing the border? First you must find out his phone number, then using a different phone make a phone call to him.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you call a doctor whos black A doctor

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the chicken cross the road? 4

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why did javonne choose club getaway madonna wanted to foster

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How many ADD kids does it take to screw...

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why was Yabba annoyed? Because the idiots who do the audio description voiceover for Timmy Time on BBC iPlayer frequently refer to her as a male even though she is clearly a female duck.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why did the kid fall off the swing? someone threw a fridge at him

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What happens to the yellow hat when it is thrown into the red sea? It get's wet.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what did batman say to robin to tell him to get in the car? get in.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's the difference between a water melon and a baby? One's fun to hit with a sledge hammer, the other's just a water melon.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

K.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops