how many babies dose it take to paint a fence it depends on how hard you throw them

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Who comes up with terrible jokes and then mentions the name of the person they are talking about like a bitch? Both of us, Dylan.

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Why did Dom stop smoking? Because he died

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

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A blonde and a brunette were hanging onto the edge of a cliff for dear life. The brunette somehow found the strength to climb back up. The blonde was impressed, but had muscular dystrophy so she slipped and fell to her death.

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What did james say on his bitrhday? There was no birthday because he was aborted but he said ''crunch'' anyway

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Whats worse than being a Jew? Being black.

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what do you call a black who stabbed your entire family? it all depends on what his name happens to be

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roses are read violets are blue my fanny is orange I have the flu my name is gemma

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Where's Waldo? The cemetery, he died last week.

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What do you call a black man with a brain injury? Mentally Disabled

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what do the parents of a starved family do? kill their kids chop them up into little pieces and eat them.

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There are 3 guys, a fat guy, a skinny guy, and sexy guy. They all work together and have lunch together. The fat guy opens his bag and eats a ham and turkey sandwich. The skinny guy opens his bag and eats a tuna sandwich. The sexy guy opens his bag and eats an egg sandwich. The fat guy finishes his meal. The skinny guy saves half for later. The sexy guy ate more than half of his food. A genie magically appears. The End

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wanna hear a joke?... Womens rights

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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I was playing Black Ops online, my wife turned it off in the middle of the game....I killed her

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What's worse than a dead baby joke? A dead baby.

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What's the difference between a black man and a Jew? The sandwich is hidden under the couch, and is non-migratory.

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An alcoholic is someone you don't like who drinks as much as you do.

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What do you get when you cross a lion with a rhinoceros? A trip to the hospital and animal cruelty charges.

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What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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Why did the man have no friends? He stabbed an innocent woman and is now rotting in prison.

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you say "ask me if im a tree" he says "r u a tree?" you say"no..." then just stare at them

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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