Why did the chicken cross the road? I dream of a day when chickens won't be questioned about their actions

What did John F. Kennedy say to Kurt Cobain? Nothing. They never met.

what do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet? last years hide and go seek champion

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Milkman. Milkman who? I've been coming here for 14 years and you don't even know my name? I helped take your mother to the hospital for crying out loud! I held you in my arms as a baby! And you don't even have the decency to remember MY NAME?! I'm sorry I don't live in a house that allows milk and other groceries to be delivered, I'm sorry that I wasn't born into a nice family with a nice home! I'm sorry that I have had to come here EVERY WEEK FOR FOURTEEN YEARS and you can't even remember my NAME! My name! I left my family for christmas one year to go pick up that elmo doll for you when you were a kid! I saved you from that burning treehouse! I helped you with you're 3rd grade science fair project and you won! YOU WON! We took a picture together that i have kept in my wallet. And i proudly say here's me and timmy. ME AND TIMMY! TIMMY! But no...you don't need to know my name. Well good day sir. You shan't see me again.

your momma is so poor she had you just for the free milk

what is a jews favorite holiday? the halocaust.

Q: Why was 6 afraid of 7? A: He wasn't, it turns out 7 was afraid of 6 because 6 beat 7 up in high school

what do you call a mentally and physically obese man? nothing until you know or obtain his name

whats bright and yellow? the sun.

Your mom is so fat she has to buy clothes at a Plus-size clothing store.

Roses are red Violets are blue Urine is yellowish and shit is usually brown... That's it, I was just remembering the colors of some stuffs

What do you call something that comes out of a llama's butt? poop

What do call a man with no arms or no legs that sits on the couch? Grandpa after his amputations.

Boy: Will you go out with me? Girl: No. Boy: Why? Girl: Because I don't want to.

What was Hellen Keller's favorite color? Velcro.

Why does girls have two left feet and two left hands? Because girls have no rights.

LIFE INSERT COIN TO BEGIN!!! SELECT DIFFICULTY EASY

knock knock. who's there? Alticka Alticka who? Alticka pudding cup.

Q: What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: The holocaust

Where else? The junk yard

Q: Why did the little boy drop his toy? A: He fell and broke his wrist, then dropped it in the emergency room, due to the broken wrist.

Three guys, stranded on a desert island, find a magic lantern containing a genie, who grants them each one wish. The first guy wishes he was off the island and back home. The second guy wishes the same. The third guy wishes the same.

My friend and I were telling jokes the other day. Ha said " I've run out of dead baby jokes!" to which I replied " I've run out of dead babies."

Why are kenyans so fast? Because due to evolutionary changes, people from that area of the world have evolved to have superior muscle builds to sprint, hence giving them a natural advantage against an equally trained athlete form another part of the world with an equal skill level

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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