roses are red violets are blue i dont really care about you

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Why was Billy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks him, "Why the long face?" The horse did not reply, because horses cannot talk.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 3

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Why is a cookie like a jellyfish? Because it has no bones. (Contributed by my 4-year old boy)

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cool story bro. tell it again. tell it at a party.

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How did the black man get a nice car? He spent 8 years of his life getting a doctorate so he could be hired at a job that will pay for his desired vehicle.

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How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died

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Skrillex.

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Two whales are in a bar. One says, "whoaohaoahwoahwahoh" The other says, "Go home, Frank. You're drunk."

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what was so bad about hitler? he inadvertently subjected his political officials to death by rope

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Knock knock Who's there Banana Bananas can't talk. Crap he's on to me

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Why did alfred crap his pants? because he had downs

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What do you call a man named Cornelius? Well, he prefers to go by his middle name, Eric, because he was teased as a child for being named Cornelius.

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A woman is in a terrible car crash. The husband comes in, runs to the doctor and he says "Doctor! My wife...is she going to make it?" The doctor turns and says "your wife will survive, but she's experienced heavy brain trauma. She will never walk again. You'll have to bathe her, feed her, change her diapers, and cater to her every need." The husband starts crying and says "oh my God that's terrible! Are you serious?" The doctor replies "Yes."

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"Why did the chicken cross the-" "Gosh! Why can't we just live in a world where a chicken can simply cross the road without being questioned about it's motives?!?!" ~McKenna<3

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Dead babies.

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Whats gayer than driving a prius Buttsex

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Is Charlie Sheen bi-polar? Yes.

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SUCK MY NUTS

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did you hear about the sidewalk? its all over town.

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So there is 10 Nazis and a monkey the rest doesn't matter but i farted...

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What's green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A pool table

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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