Person 1: I need an adult.... Person 2: I am an adult. Person 1: I need another adult... Person 2: My friend's an adult too. Person 1: I need a third adult Person 2: GOD UR NEEDY!

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Guess What? What? Get in the van.

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What did the doctor say to the other doctor? Hey bill

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what do you call a man with no arms or legs? numerous abusive terms as you kickk him to death.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Run it over with a lawn mower!

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The cow's name was Friday, But can you guess what day it died? Monday, it had a fun weekend with its family before it was brutally slaughtered.

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A wise man once said a journey of a thousand steps starts with one step. The wise man also smoked weed and starved to death in a cave.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was attempting to get back to his farm.

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What's worse than getting Alzheimer's? ........what am I doing here.....

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Why couldn't Bruce drive a truck? Cause Bruce was a Fish.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse then precedes to beat the bartender voraciously for making fun of his religion.

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Why did the retarded guy follow the 7 year old? Because he's a stalker.

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http://Youtube.com/User/PeGamer22

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died. Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because he was to fat. Why did the snake fall out of the tree? I don't know everything, Bitch!

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender, upon seeing him, asks him to leave. The black man is enraged by the blatant racism shown by this man, and proceeds to punch the bartender repeatedly. After 5 minutes of non-stop punching the man stops, looks at his victim, and is filled with remorse. He is dead. Upon looking around, the black man notices scaffolding and building equipment scattered around the room. He falls to the ground as he realizes the bar is still under construction, and unable to serve customers this early in development. The bartender was simply asking the man to leave for his own safety.

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matty russel are you on here

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Quizno's footlongs are four dollars...

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Why did the chicken cross the mobia strip? To get to the same side!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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What do you get when you cross your eyes? A headache.

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Why was the drunk man arrested? he beat his wife and was sentenced too 3 months in federal prison

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What is the difference between Switzerland and Sudan? One is in Europe the other is in Africa

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops