What did 7 say to 6? I hear you've been spreading stories about me.

I hate all races.. Especially the 400 meter sprint

minecraft

What did the german get for christmas? an Easy-Bake oven and a G.I. Jew

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Well, it all depends on the size of the bathtub.

Why did the little girl fall off of the swings? She had no arms... Why couldn't she get up? She had no legs... Why didn't anyone help her up? She had no friends... Why did she die? She landed in a puddle...

A mushroom walks into a bar and the bartender says "We don't serve your kind here." and then the mushroom walks out.

Cows go moo.

How many squirrels does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Who cares? Why would a squirrel need to change a lightbulb?

Me:hey paul did you see that story on the news? Paul:ya i did thats really crazy!

What do you call a Mexican that swam across the border? An illegal immigrant.

How do you know your cat is gay? Other cats have buttsex with him

What part of a vegetable are you not supposed to eat? His wheelchair.

How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

How do you get a bird off the roof you throw an ax at it

whats the difference between a guitar and a fish? A guitar is an instrument used to produce noise and a fish is a living orgnism native to lakes and oceans

Whats a buch of blacks running down a hill called? The Detroit, MI marathon in seeing that 84.3% of Detroit's population is of Arican descent.

a man walks into a bar... his drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he was late for his uncle's funeral, which was taking place in the church across from his apartment.

I saw a stray dog the other day So I petted it and got on my way.

Why did the cat eat himself? He was hungry

Whats the difference between a raisin and a old lady? One is alive, i think.

is mayonnaise an instrument?

why cant stevie wonder read? because hes black

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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