Knock, knock. Who's there? Polite cow who recognizes normal social cues and civilly waits for its turn to contribute to a conversation. Polite cow who recognizes normal social cues and civilly waits for its turn to contribute to a conversation who? Moo.

How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at it's face.

What's the most common way to become mentally challenged? Getting hit by a shovel a couple times

Q :Why cant mexicans be firemen A :because they get mixed up by Hosea and Hose B

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Q Whats Yellow, Has a body, And has a Spiky head ? A a pineapple

What's creepy about a loving couple having sex? I made them do it.

Build a man a fire and he will be warm for a night, set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

Whats on my leg? A pimple. What is it doing? Releasing a white/clear puss.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse becomes depressed. He didn't ask to look like this. He drinks himself into a stupor, and then crashes into another car on the highway on the way home, killing a family of five. The horse is now in jail for life.

Knock Knock! Who's there? Pen. Pen who? Pen is blue. The pen is blue. THE GOD DAMN PEN IS BLUE!!!!

Roses are red My name is Dave This makes no sense MICROWAVE

a, b, c, d, e, f, g, h, i, j, k, l, m, n, o, p, q, refrigerator.

How do u get a clown off of a swing? You hit him with an axe.

what did the penguin say to the dodo bird. nothing because dodo birds have bin extinct for thousands of years and it is highly unlikely for a dodo bird to be saying anything to a penguin do to the fact they wouldn't be anywhere near each other and neither species can speak.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Tourette's, PENIS.

Whats worst than finding half a worm in your apple? Getting rapped by a giant scorpian

A baby seal walks into a club.

Why did the chicken die? Because it was crossing a busy road.

what did the parapelegic (limbless) kid get for his birthday? Heart failure

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

What's big? Jupiter.

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he has has no arms.

There once was a man from nantucket. But he moved to California after he won the State lottery.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...