What's the difference between an onion and a baby ? You cry when you cut the onion.

Why did the boy drop his Ice cream? A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him.

how do you stop a speeding vehicle? throw a refrigerator at it.

Did you hear about the kidnapping in Pennsylvania? He woke up...

Why didn't the Jew laugh at the joke concerning his familial genealogy in relation to WW2? He had orofacial paralysis and was therefore physically incapable of expressing joy through the means of his mouth

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the farmer cross the road? To pick up the dead chicken

What did the previously pregnant teen flush down the toilet? Her beloved pet goldfish who recently died. She had already given birth to a healthy baby the previous year.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Someone else's cheese.

I'm so full I could stop eating.

how hungry am i? well im as hungry a starving kid in africa!!!!

regoereiorgiorehgijreirehrfjirgjirejgruirehgrghehiiehaoiwpo;lkswpokewqoifgoieqjgiubtfoewfiir K.O

What is worse than getting a paper cut? Your whole family dying to MERS in Peru before you were old enough to remember any of them.

How do you make a clown happy? You sucks it's dick

Why did lil' Jenny fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Walruses are basically saber-toothed seals. That does not affect the fact that they are awesome.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

How did the frog fly? It drank a magic potion. How did the snake fly? It ate the frog How the the eagle fly? It already can.

Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

WOMENS RIGHTS

Why can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't Why can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllpeople tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't Why can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllpeople tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't Why can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllpeople tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't Why can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllpeople tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllllWhy can't people tickle themselves? Because they can only hdhegebehegsggsgggggggglllllllll

roses are blue violets, are orange, i am color blind

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I peek in your window, Yes, I'm watching you

What did the pretty young girl get for her birthday? Cake and presents (get your mind out of the gutter).

Yo mama is so fat, so when she jumped of a building, she died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...