What's the difference between ten dead babies and a Ferrari. A Ferrari isn't in my garage.

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what is funnier then a man with AIDS? -nearly anything as AIDS is a serious medical condition and could be potentially lethal

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My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot turned into a loaf of bread.

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What makes women so mystifying and beautiful? Tits.

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what did one tornado say to the other? im dizzy

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how do you put a elephant in a fridge? open it and put it inside. how do you put a lion in a frige? you take out the elephant and put in the lion. there is a meeting for all the animals in the world which animal doesnt go? the lion because he's in the fridge. a man callshis dog and it doesnt come why not? because its at the meeting

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Two drums and a cymbal fall down a cliff. Ba-dum pssh.

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Why the West African Rhino is extinct? They were never Horny

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Traveling Salesman.

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What did the octopus say to the lion? Nothing, because the likely hood of a lion and an octopus meeting is incredibly slim, as an octopus is a sea creature, and a lion isn't. A lion and an octopus cant even communicate with each other anyway, so even if they did come across each other they wouldn’t be able to talk. Octopi are also anti-social creatures by nature so I can say with some confidence that the lion and the octopus will not have a convocation. Written By JAMES!

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why did CJ cry?he just ate a pie full of meat from his favorite animal.Pig

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Q:What happens when you choke a smurf? A: Nothing because smurfs dont exist

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What's worse than a bug in your soup? Getting shot in the stomach.

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An Irishman walks into a bar and orders a Coke.

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Roses are black. Violets are black. Everything is black. I'm Helen Keller.

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Why did little jimmy fall off the building? 9/11

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Why was the black man fired from his job? Because the company was beginning to lose sales which then resulted in job cuts.

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roses are red violets are blue however some roses are pink

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Your hat is not on you head. Where is it On you head

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Why does the kid cries when he sees me? Cuz i took his lollypop last week.

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Whats worse than death? Getting expelled from Hogwarts

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, I'm a Schizophrenic And so am I

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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