One dog says to the other dog "Nice day, isn't it?" The other dog says "You can talk!?"

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Roses are red Violets are blue Dandelions are weeds

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Whats pink and fluffy? Pink Fluff

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first muffin turns to the second and says "it sure is getting hot in here!". The second muffin looks over and responds "this makes no sense - we shouldn't be capable of speech, let alone self-awareness." "We probably should try to get out of here, though."

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a man made a beautiful colorful picture and hit print. the printer then grew a mind of its own and did the most horriffic and evil thing ever; he printed it in black and white.

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You know what they called Obama in highschool? Nigge*

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How did the guy drown if he wasn't in water? A shark threw up on him

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A large man goes into a restaurant and places his order The waiter asks if he would like the weight watchers menu He says no because he doesnt care about his weight

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What is matt dalys favorite thing in the world? penis

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Why aren't anti jokes funny? Idk. Watermelon in your pants, you're adopted.

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Nice weather we're having.

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How do you do you cure cancer? Very carefully.

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Q) What do you call a black president? A) Mr. President

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What do u call a gay dinosaur? Dinosaurs don't exist

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Why couldnt the kid see the pirate movie? Because he didn't have eyes.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" Turns out a man suffering from schizophrenia believes he is a bartender for animals as his health slowly declines as his family comes to visit him every day.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, your Heart maybe splited into two but, if you love me i would fix it for you

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Your mother is so fat that she once ate an entire peach cobbler in one sitting and chastised herself yet again for her lack of self-control over her eating habits and her need to fill the holes in her self esteem with the short-lived gratification she gains from eating too much of the foods she finds tasty.

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since when?

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What did the deaf guy get for Christmas? An iTunes gift card

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all stranded on a desert island for a few weeks. They get to know each other really well.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A zebra that's been brutally cut open.

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Why did the Black guy work at KFC? To provide money for his struggling family.

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Why couldn't the duck get his driver's license? Well, it was a duck and as far as we're concerned they don't have thumbs or arms and are therefore incapable of driving.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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