Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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What do you call the man with no arms and no legs? Jeff. Because that's his ****ing name.

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what is more annoying than finding a worm in your apple? An asian kid with ADHD.

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Why is the grass always greener on the other side? because they have a landscaper.

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What do u call a black man playing a jumping sport? I don't know but it is totally normal.

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asking someone to check ur broken wing mirror to fall into that persons arms by accident is not a good idea

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Q: Why did the grand mother drop her cane? A: She got pused out a window.

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what has one ear, one leg, one eye, one arm, and is Jewish half a Jew

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car

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Whats sad about 4 black guys in a cadillac driving over a cliff? A cadillac seats 5

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what's worse than waiting 45 minutes in an amusement park ride? getting your penis chopped off.

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Why were the black mans hands all sticky? He was helping orphans with arts and crafts

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What did the skinny man say to the fat woman. That sucks.

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Yo momma is so fat, her total body volume is slightly larger than a normally proportioned person of smaller mass!

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why did the goat go up the ladder? because its ladder goat

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Bob: I have a funny knock knock joke, but you have to start it. Joe: Ok. Knock Knock. Bob: Who's there? Joe: Uhhhhhhh Bob: Exactly.

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A man with his masters degree, has a great job, and gets good money. Has a wife and kids. He is very successful.

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whats worse than falling off of your bike? thats as bad as it gets,try to think of something else

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Q: "What did the blueberry say to the cheesecake?" A: "I'm not your friend anymore!"

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You know what they say about guys with big feet. They have big feet.

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What's green and has wheels? Green cars.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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What do you call a baby in a blender? Child abuse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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