my name is piare (peeair) because my balder is empty

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Barack Obama

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What does a pelican and a taxman have in common? Both are bipedal, both are carbon-based lifeforms that procreate by DNA replication, both in all probablility eat fish, both have survival instinct, both require fresh water for hydration, both have five senses; vision, hearing, touch, taste and smell, both are capable of at least limited cognition, and both can turn aggressive when provoked.

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what did one cow say to the other cow. nothing as its mouth was filled with grass thus it could not speak or it would be deemed as rude.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The mailman. I don't believe you.

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why is the spine-tailed swift the fastest bird? because its faster than the second fastest bird.

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How dead people are in a graveyard? All of them

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What does Santa and a grape have in common? They're both purple, except Santa.

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why was the black guy running from the cops? i dont know either

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What did one chimney say to the other chimney. Nothing, chimneys dont talk.

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Your mom is so fat, she has diabetes.

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Q. What did the Vampire say when he ate the Pizza? A. Nothing. It is literally impossible for a vampire to be real, therefore it's insane if you thought it said something.

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what did one wall say to another wall? nothing walls cant talk

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Why did the black man eat the fried chicken? He was hungry

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You're on fire.

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nickel back

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was clumsy.

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How do you get a priest to cry? Stab him.

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Why isn't Abraham Lincoln on Mount Rushmore? Because he doesn't have a helicopter and he's dead.

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tw10xa_xtNg

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Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

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Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M Factory Because she repeatedly wrote Ws

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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A black man shoots some hoops. One of the bullets bounces off the rim and hits him in the eye. The man dies. His grandmother is still alive to attend his funeral.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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