Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man said lol, I said lol back. Then he started to beat me up for repeating his phrase!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Knock knock Who's there? Boo Boo who? It's just a joke you don't have to cry about it

thumb_up thumb_down +20

I have read and agreed to the terms of service

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A man and his young child walk into a clinic to get physical check-up. The man learns from the physicist he doesn't mater. His wife remarries and start having frequent sex and the child is scarred for life. This is irrelevant because both parents don't exist and this is all a constant delusion in an psychiatric hospital.

thumb_up thumb_down

What the difference between a circle and a triangle? You're an idiot if you don't know the difference.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why couldn't the dog say anything to the cat? It was born deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Three politicians walk into a sports bar. Suddenly, everyone is watching the Stanley Cup playoffs.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are red Violets are blue classic

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Q: What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Knock Knock. Who's There? Nobody, this is a metaphorical door..

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why is an elephant big, gray and lumpy? Because if it was small, white and smooth it would be an Asprin.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Woah again Nero, you are so wise... I love you, I really do. If someone can and has already changed the world for the better, its you. No wonder people believe you have superhuman abilities, I used to think so too, but I think I understand what humans can do on another level now, you did that, thank you.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Yo mamma's so black, and that's ok. We're all different and unique.

thumb_up thumb_down +113

A man walked into a bar. That hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A man walks into a bar. Inside he finds Hitler, his wife, and an angry badger. They are pleased to see him and they all relate to each other through their shared love of bocce ball.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Suicide isn't the answer, it's just the solution. -by Ross

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A man goes to the doctor and is told, "you have cancer." He then spends his last days writing a bucket list, but losing his leg in a wood chipper before he could complete a single item on his list

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did Helen Keller see on her trip? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What's faster than a black man carrying your TV? The law enforcement that promptly catches him and is about to charges him with theft regardless of his ethnicity because stealing someone else's property is just generally an unlawful thing to do.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why did the zebra cross the road?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

I swear to drunk officer I'm not god.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

you know why they're called ear wigs, right? cause they go in your ears! then they wig out? no, they kill you.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Fred: says hi Bob: says shut up why the hell do you have to be so rude!!! Fred:thankyou ob thats better

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops