Roses are Red Violets are Blue It is Valentines Day So I had to get them for you or we would get into a big fight, which will end up with me on the couch.

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saftey torch you can out it on the porch. saftey torch put it in the hallway. saftey torch scare the monsters away. saftey torch that'll be 50 bucks.

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Gravity

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"My CiOCK is bigger!" "No! My CiOCK is bigger!": Two gamec.ock owners arguing over who has a bigger DiICK.

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why did the clown stop laughing? because it got hit by an axe

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What's worse than 1 bee sting ? 2 bee stings What's worse than 2 bee stings ? the holocaust what's worse than the holocaust ? 3 bee stings

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has he!

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Why did the robot cross the road? Because It was bionically fused to the chicken.

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What do you call a rapist who uses condoms and excessive lubricant? A Rapist.

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3 men are stranded on an island when they come across a brass lantern. The rub it and nothing happens. They all starve to death a day later.

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Why did the virgin jerk until his hand was raw? He didn't have lotion.

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Why did the chicken sneeze? Because someone put pepper on its nose.

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Why did the elephant fall on the marshmallow? Because he didn't want to fall in the hot chocolate!

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HEY YOU! TISSUE!

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What did the man say to the bartender when he wanted a beer? Get me a beer.

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Why wasn't the boy at school? Obviously it was the weekend.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? I don't know, you answer the door.

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What happens when you light a truck full of babies on fire and drive it off a cliff filled with lava and set off explosives when they land? The babies die. www.youtube.com/LouisGames www.twitch.tv/KiLM_Ghostz

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What's the best thing about twenty three year olds? there are twenty of them

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OMG I was sexting my friend and I accidentally sent my naked picture to my parents. What do I do? Tell your friend that you accidentally sent your naked picture to your parents.

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The WNBA.

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What's a lil plus a lot A little more then a lot

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i love u. so rate me good or i will talk to my lawyer. nothing personal, i just have no arms, legs, or nose and got broken up with by a girlfriend yesterday (and no, she was not fake) Her name was maria. On the bright side, my grandma woke up this morning!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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