Snooki want smoosh smoosh

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There once was a man from Peru who dreamed he was eating his shoe he woke with a fright, in the middle of the night and then went back to sleep

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Yo mama so stupid she stole free bread.

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wife: why are women's feet smaller husband: so they can stand closer to the kitchen sink

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Roses are grey Violets are grey Everything is grey I am a dog

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ok everybody to make this more simple we all have to line up alphabetically by height.

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Knock knock Who's there? You're You're who? YOU'RE MOM IN MY BED!!! (i know it sucks)

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Why do you never see hippopotamus hiding in trees? They are really good at it.

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There is a bomb. It blows up and kills 26 people.

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Tell me fuck you Fuck you No fuck your mum

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Roses are red Violets are red Bushes are red Why's my garden on fire?

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Womens rights.

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My mother got hammered last night. We cried at her funeral.

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Whats the difference between a jew and firewood? Firewood is meant to be burned in a stove or firepit while jews are functioning members of society.

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A) why did the black guy leave the bar B) cause he was tired and wanted to go home

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Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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I'm so hungry, I could eat an adequately sized meal

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What did the math teacher get after he ate and he ate? A full stomach.

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How many flies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? It needed excitement in its otherwise mundane lifestyle.

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whats black and has 3 legs? a spider with 5 missing legs.duh.

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Adele walks into a bar. The barman says she's too ugly hahahahahahahahahahhahahahha lololololololololololololol

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, your tits are nice

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What do you do when a blonde falls up an elevator? Pray, and hope Jesus will take you as well. Just kidding, Jesus isn't real.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops