Why did little Jimmy cry when his Rolls Royce got destroyed? Because his parents were in it.

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im a dragon, no im not

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Your mother's breasts sag so low that the late great impressionist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

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Why did Jerald heat up pizza? Because he was hungry.

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Why cant i stand up? Cause i shat my pants

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What did the cat say when it jumped into the cardboard box? Meow

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what is black and white and read all over? a bankrupt newspaper that cannot afford color ink because the accountant misplaced company funds.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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What do you call a black man with a job? An employee

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how do u piss of a polish man? rape his girlfriend

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How did the fat woman survive the car accident? She had on her seat belt.

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Why do the lesbians where pants? Because they are extremely comfourtable and the best for cold days

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Q:Whats worse then hard nipples A:The holocaust

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Q: What did the clown say when he got in a car accident? A: Nothing. He died.

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But one McDonalds Happy Meal for the price of two, and receive another McDonalds Happy meal absolutley free!

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What did the one horse say to the other. Nothing because horses can't talk.

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What did Abraham lincoln do after getting assassinated? Certainly not riding a bike thats for sure.

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How did Clumsy Clearance eat shit? He was in the Human Centipede.

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QUIT PUSHING DAD GUMMIT!!!

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kids make accidents in the backseat of your car but u and your wife made an accident in the backseat and thats how you got that rottten troll that makes accidents in the car!!

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Q:What do you find in the middle of a pile of dead babies? A:Another dead baby!

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Dear Chase. You are retarded Your jokes suck Violets are red jump off a bridge

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Q: where was Johnny during the bombing? A: everywhere

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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