Why did the chicken cross the road? Due to a lack of awareness of its surrounding, it died attempting to cross the road.

What did the teacher say to the kid who got a 0 on a multiple choice spelling test? Wow your really dumb. Idiot

why was joe in hospital with facial disorder? his mum hit him with a fridge

A zen master walks up to a hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything." The vendor says, "Sorry, we're out of relish." Then the zen master tells him, "Sir, I don't think you get the joke. As you can see by my long silk robes and fu manchu, I am clearly a zen master. And I have used a pun that would make you think I were asking for enlightenment from a hot dog." The vendor then says, "We don't take too kindly to wise guys here." And then the prick gets up and tosses me into the street!

Why a man without hands and without legs want to stay in a barrel? He actually doesn't, but is unable to get out of it.

when you smile the whole world stops and stares for a while because you have one tooth and its half chipped.. and your a black mexican red head.

Robin, get in the car!

A coach and a priest walk into a boys and girls club and kick out all the girls.

What does 2 + 2 equal? 4

Nick Demarco got butt due to the high number of females in his apartment

Women. Can't live with them. Can't systemically murder them without compromising the reproductive integrity of the species.

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

How many drunk Irishmen did it take to change the lightbulb? None, the bulb was fine.

Guess what what?? chicken butt!!!!!

How many jews can you fit in a buick? 6...only if you squeeze 4 in the back.

Which is heavier, a tonne of feathers or a tonne of lead? It doesn't matter when your loved ones are being torn apart by bears.

There is a newly wed couple, a biker and his biker lady friends. The newly wed man says to his wife, "Pass the honey, honey". One of the biker chicks looks over. Five minutes later the man says to his wife, "Pass the sugar, sugar". They biker chick looks back at them and then asks the biker man, "Why don't you treat us like that?" " You know your right. Pass the bacon... lovely". And from that day on the bikers lived in peace and harmony.

Yo momma so Fat that she got picked for the Olympic Swim Team

What is worse than finding a real joke on Anti-joke.com? Starving children in Africa.

What is the difference between a Ferrari and 1,000 dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

a 7 year old child is watching a show that involves a c0ck, an ass, a bitch, and a bastard......... However this show is completely appropriate for a 7 year old, what could possibly be inappropriate about a chicken, donkey, dog and an orphan?

What is blue and feels like fluff? Blue fluff

Knock, knock No, I do not want to hear about God.

What's better than finding Jesus in your room? Finding Chuck Norris in your bed.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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