Your mama is so fat she has to buy plus sized clothes.

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What did the baby say to the banana? -- "mama!"

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A dirty joke: The white horse fell in the mud.

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What did Stevie Wander get for christmas? A book

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You've been in robotics too long if you start talking to your tools. You've been in there way too long if they start talking back!

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Why was it so hard for teachers to teach Tommy? Tommy is brain dead

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What did the jewish boy get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Doctor, everybody despises me. That cant be totally true you despicable piece of shite!

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing. I lied about the deer.

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What did the Muffin say to the other muffin ? I dont know

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The fitting room is a lie. Nothing fit me at all.

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Why was the sea green? because a whale took a piss

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Why is my penis so small? No, seriously, can anyone tell me?

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Roses are red, white, pink, and many other colors. Violets similarly display many color variations due to generations of ardent florists.

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Women's Basketball.

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dj miky

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An Admiral walks into Ackbar...

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Start by getting your fucking ass off this site and get me the fucking money asap yourself! And your contact information! Fuck your "eye for an eye" piece of shit example, I want redemption! If I am to live with self respect after losing a FUCKING EYEBALL! I demand that you lose EVERYTHING YOU HOLD DEAR! YOU FUCKING QUEER HYPOCRITE! And I am not asking that you take away everything, I will take everything you hold dear away from you myself! Then again, why do that when I can get straight to the source and break your spine, and that is just the first step to making you wish you where dead! That you end up begging me for THE SWEET MERCY OF DEATH! Listen, if you want to talk, lets talk, if you claim to be so fucking powerful get on a goddamn jet and get over here yourself, no goons, no "shadows", no "followers" of "your order" when you present it, and "our order" when YOU FUCK UP! Only then will I "listen to reason", it is only reasonable you come out of your fucking hiding place and face me! I wont fight you, I wont kill you, but you better get your fucking face over here yourself.

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what did the judge say to the lawyer during a trial. He said We are all in a court. thus concluding that the judge was retarted.

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What did the rich man say to the poor man? i feel sorry for you

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Shit... Shit who? Wrong house... Do I know you Shitt Ronghouse? Yes. Please come in. Okay.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your mother.

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your skull would make a nice pen holder

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A duck walks into a bar.... Animal control is swiftly called and the duck is relocated to a nearby park.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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