What's worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice.

Why did the mushroom go to the party? Because he was a fungi.

What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can A hundred dead babies in a trash can Whats worse than a hundred dead babies in a trash can A live one at the bottom Whats worse than that It eats it way out Whats worse than that It brings friends

What do you call a blonde on anti-joke? Fairly paranoid because of the typical blonde stereotype.

How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It's an obscure number you've probably never heard of.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to, like any other chicken

Q. What did the wierd kid get for christmas A. A Pokemon diamond edition

Have you seen stevie wonders new house No Neither has he

Q: What's the capital of Ohio A: O

Two doctors were performing open heart surgery on a 54-year old woman. The surgery was a success, and she is now living comfortably in Portland, OR. She enjoys sweet tea.

Why couldn't the blonde bride make it to her own wedding? She had another unplanned circumstance occur and the wedding was postponed until next week.

Why did the boy fall down the stairs? Because he tripped.

Salt: "Hi there!" Slug: "AAÀAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHHH!!!" *dies*

Why was the boy crying in public with no clothes on? Because he had no clothes on in public.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm a skitsofrantic, and so am I

roses are red violets are blue does this smell like chloroform

Why did the Asian ace the test? Because she had worked very diligently, taken copious notses, and studied fervently until she had a thorough mastery of the topic.

knock knock! who's there? me.(walks away...)

what did the red rock say to the blue rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk.

Why did Billy start a fire? Because he was cold.

shut up elliot

Your social life.

Dennis: you can make anything out of coppersulfate Austin: But copper sulfate can make things out of you

Beans, beans the magical fruit. The more you smoke, the blacker your lungs get.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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