Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why didn't Superman save anyone on September 11? He was in a wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A blonde and a brunette jump off a building, who hits the ground first? The one that jumped first

thumb_up thumb_down -21

okay so this guy walks into the bar and says DON BE STUPE SHE SPIT GOOD AND EVERYTHIN. why did he say that. BECAUSE EVERYBODY HATES HIS SPIT

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the chicken not make it across the road? Because he got hit by a transport.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's worse than a dead baby? Two dead babies. What's worse than that? Two dead babies nailed to a tree. What's worse than that? Two dead trees naild to a baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Your mother is so white that when she dances, she is off beat a little bit.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

CUT MY SOUL INTO PIECES MY NAME IS VOLDEMORT TERMINATION YOU'RE BLEEDING DON'T GIVE A F**K IF I HAVE NO NOSE FOR BREATHING

thumb_up thumb_down -17

what do you call a million black people on the moon? a good start

thumb_up thumb_down -39

A man walked into a bar. It was closed, so I don't see how this was possible.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

In Soviet Russia! People were much more finacially secure than they are now.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What does a salmon and a falcon have in common They both live underwater except for the falcon.

thumb_up thumb_down

I have Alzheimer. What?

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Q: What do you call a man with a spade in his head? A: An ambulance.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What sits in a corner and travels all the way around the world? A stoner on hallucinogens.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Tyler Bishop is a waffle

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why doesn't McDonald's sell hot dogs? They don't want to advertise for McWeenies.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

people on this site vote for anti-jokes that make them laughed

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call a Black White supremisist? Well you see the Black man was blind and thought he was a racists redneck. He then contracted cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Whats The diference between a park bench and a black man? A park bench can support a family of five hahahhaahahah

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q. What do you get when you cross a man, a bear and a pig? A. ManBearPig

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what did the apple say to the orange? :nothing because an apple is not a human organism nor an orange therefore they can not speak....

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Roses are red Violets are blue My body is ready I want you

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops