why did winnie the pooh have his head in the toilet,? it was clogged.

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How do Helen keller's parents punish her? They sternly reprimand her for her misdeeds.

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Why is Pawn Stars the best show on the History Channel? Because Pawn Stars is the only show on the History Channel.

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How do you make a Plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Firgen and the blung brigade

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A small child walks past a man on the street: Fortunately, as the man hates children he is perfect height to let a massive fart rip in his face on the way past. His mum looks disgusted. They carry on with their day.

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what is long hard and full of seamen......... A sumbirine..........................(what were you thinking)

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How do you know when a Captcha defect causes you to post the same anti-joke three times? Canteloupe.

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why did the asian go to the bar?? i dont know you tell me.

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What is more tragic than a nice day wasted? Obesity.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing.

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Yo mama so fat, she farts dust

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Why was the girl stupid? She didn't pay attention in school because everyone was making fun of her blonde hair.

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I'm on a seafood diet. It consists of prawns and tuna.

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How do you confuse a blonde?? Throw her in a circle room and tell her to find all the corners If she comes out and says I found the corners.. then your screwed

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2 blondes walk into bolemics anonymous.

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A man heard a thundering sound. It was thunder.

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What did the German say to the Jew? Sorry.

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What do you call a Jew A Jew

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Your mother is so fat that I suggest she should pay a visit to the nutritionist so they can work out a dieting plan together to prevent weight-related heart problems in the near future.

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A man walks into the doctor's office and says "Doc my leg really hurts when I poke it like this." The doctor replies, "Yes, that is a knife."

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Why did the black man crash his car? His low-income job forced him to buy a toyota.

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What's the difference between a woman and a cat? Numerous things

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Your mom is so ugly that she often finds it difficult attracting members of the opposite sex.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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