There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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What do you say to an over weight Jewish mother? "Work on those crunches" He was her coach.

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What do you call a black man who has become a millionare? A financhaly successful buisnessman who worked hard to be where he is today.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he wants to drink. He orders a beer.

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Guess what? You just lost the game.

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Have you ever watched that show on Lifetime about that woman?

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sandwich. roller coaster. brain sprout. cholera, meander. time. rivet.porcupine. mayonaise. frying. x-ray forever.

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What do you call a girl who disappears on the 3 May 2007? Madeleine McCann

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Roses are red my name is Dave this poem makes no sense, micorwave

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How do you kill a blue elephant? How? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? How? You hold it's nose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a orange elephant? How? You can't, they don't exist. How do you kill a white elephant? How? You tickle it till it turns pink, then you hold it's noose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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Why did little Sally drop her ice cream? She got ran over by the school bus

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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A gay man takes another gay man home after a wild night at the city's top club. They choose to be safe and not have gay sex.

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Paperclip... BANANA?!

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How do you stop a baby from falling into a manhole? You catch it, and then call the appropriate services and inform them of the dangerous open manhole.

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Q: What do you call a Polish astronomer? A: Copernicus.

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Why was the Indian at the casino? He had a gambling addiction.

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No it doesnt..

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"What was the hardest thing about that kid getting killed by that bus." "What?" "My dick"

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www.hurr-durr.com

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What do you call a pair of owls? Two owls.

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A black man and a jew both fall off a cliff, who hits the ground first? the black man

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So a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order some wine and have an enjoyable evening.

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Why is six afraid of seven? There might've been a little shooting accident a few days ago which put his mother in the ER. If anyone asks go to a bar and think in your head why you would ask something like that. Let it sink in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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