Whats worse than finding a worm in an apple? having a worm sized penis.

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66

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Two peanuts walked into a bar one was as'salted'

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman.

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What did the fat girl use on Wii Fit? Cheat Codes.

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whats cold, blue and hard? a frozen blueberry.

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Sorry, I need to take care of business up here, it is for the best that we do not communicate for a while, suspicions are going to be flaring up all over the place You better keep your head low, the place with the code-name "The Kings Throne" was under attack, but as you might know, its not what it used to be, you should all leave Point Zero in 3-4 hours when the dust has settled. Personally I suspect it is someone from the past, yes rivals, but according to the information nobody that knows who "The Nero" is, so as you can already tell, you and I are in equal danger until this is resolved. I promise to call you someday

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A jew, a catholic, and a muslim walk into a bar. Within minutes, they begin to argue about religion. After a few hours of intense debate, all three left dissatisfied and upset.

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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What does a kid with no arms and legs get for christman.... Cancer...

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What is the difference between a baby and a tampon? A tampon doesn't cry when it's hungry or tired.

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The awkward moment when these anti jokes are NOT funny. at all.

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A man walks into a bar, politely orders one drink, sips it while having social conversations with his peers, pays his tab, and goes to take the bus home. I can respect that.

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Your mama is so ugly, when she looks in the mirror it displays her reflection like all mirrors do

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What did the octopus say to the squid? Nothing, considering these two species can't speak.

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what do you call a dog? it doesn't matter what you call it, its not coming

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what is the difference between me and a grown black man.... i went to school

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Why did Sam have no friends? Because he was dead.

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Roses are der Violets are eulb I am dyslexic

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Robert supra not deep throwing kaleb law wrench

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why dont black people go on cruises? there not falling for that one again

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Three dogs start a club called the Holly Place Exclusive Dog Club. The Club Motto is, "You can't be in our club. Just us. Read the sign. It says "Exclusive". How is that confusing? Get away from here. Now."

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Why couldn`t Sally open the jar? Because she did not have thumbs.

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The bird is not the word.... Its two

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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