Jolly Rancher the particle beam is in the alpha quadrant and we are good to go.Please confirm receipt of this communique. Cell Leader Iqbal

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Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because the paint used on their faces makes the extra terrestrials leery of lead poisoning.

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roses are green violets are green i was drunk last night

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How are Polish people and dogs the same? They aren't. One is a human being, and one is a dog. Do not be stupid.

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what happens when you throw a green rock into the red sea? -- it gets wet

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a black guy walks into a bar and sits next to a white guy. White guy: "I don't like your kind here". Black guy: "what kind wound that be"? White guy: "the colored kind". The black guy turns away then looks back at the white guy and says", When I'm born I'm black, when I die I'm black, When I'm cold I'm black, and when I'm sick I'm black. You ( to the white guy ) when your born your pink, when you die your blue, when your cold your purple, and when your sick your green and your calling me colored???

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Why was a white man surrounded by black men crying? He was in a support group for black men with vitiligo, which destroys skin pigments.

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What do you say if you see a monkey driving a car? Nothing , you run away because primates are incapable to have motor skill and will probably crash within the next 50 feet

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hi bye

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What would you do if I jumped down your throat when you were talking? That would never happen, as it's impossible to even climb into somebody's mouth.

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Little boy: Daddy, daddy, I know what i want for Christmas! Dad: Oh really? and whats that? Little boy: I want a bicycle! Dad: Why my son? You are already on a wheelchair...

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What is worse than a worm in you're apple? Two worms in you're apple.

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What do you call a woman with one leg? I don't know. I am not in the position, currently, of knowing anyone who finds themselves in such an unfortunate condition.

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Why was the Pædophile arrested? He hit his wife.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ken. Can I some and use your toilet, I really need a shit.

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What do you call a fish with no eye? Blind.

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A man walks into a bar. "Ouch, he says, I did not see that bar there."

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Who is stupid and no one likes him. Me. :(

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Angus is so Scottish he wears a kilt when it is socially appropriate.

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What do you call a black man who flies planes? A pilot, what do you call him you freaking racist!?!?!?!?!?

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What stops a fully black english man from marrying a fully chinese women, the language barrier of course!

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whats better than a dead baby..... wait..... whats worse than a dead baby...... never mind its not that funny anymore

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go F*** yourself

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Q :What do you call a cow running through a field? A: Bob

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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