Why did Tommy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Tommy.

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there are two muffins in an oven one muffin says "whoa, its hot in here!" the other says nothing, because it is a muffin, and the other muffin, in reality, said nothing either.

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whats round red and taste like candy? such a thing doesn't exist

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Wolf Pussy

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is created to be used by multiple people for sitting down or other forms of rest, and does not have consciousness or the complex body systems of humans and other animals.

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whats funny about four dead horses in a park ? the horses are dead!

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see monkey do. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the second monkey.

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Why did the man buy a rope? Because he needed a noose

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What did Justin Bieber say when he felt funny? Wheres my tampon

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How can you make a little boy tell the truth? Threaten to murder his family.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Rape

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's a free drink, you'll wake up in my basement.

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A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

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I'll take a Reuben, light sauce, and could you do Provolone instead of Swiss?

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What did the black guy get for Christmas? (In 1938) A bruise from the Klu Klux Klan.

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Q:Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Conrad Barry

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A neutron walks into a bar. He orders a drink and ponders why his mother gave him the name, "A neutron."

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Why did the boy get teased? Because his name was spelt wrong (k)urtis

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Whats worse than ten dead babies in one tree? I dont know, but that is quite a graphic sight i have in my mind right now.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Hello. We would like to talk about Jesus with you.

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One time I said to my friend, "There are too many black people in this country." I forgot he was black.

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Why was the black man hanging from the tree? He fell and had to grab a branch.

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colourblind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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