In soviet Russia...things are different

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Woman rights.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why did the Jewish man stop to pick up a quarter off the filthy street? He saw a homeless man begging on the street corner and thought that he could give him the spare change he found.

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How many band geeks does it take to catch a football? One, especially if he/she is on the football team.

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-Ask me if I'm a tree. +Are you a tree? -Yes. -Ask me if I'm an orange. +Are you an orange? -No, I'm a tree, were you listening me?

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Dusters blow stuff.

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What do get when you mix cancer and a bike? Lance Armstrong

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How long does it take to cook a baby in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy jacking off.

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watch a i d s left

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Why did the hamster not eat it's food? Because it wasn't hungry.

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How do white people screw in light bulbs? They read a manual.

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There is a famous joke, "What's black and white and re(a)d all over? A newspaper!" However, this is not featured on this website. Why? Because this is anti-joke.com, not joke.com - you moron

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james schmitt whats your last name

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: In order to avoid being mauled by a coyote.

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How did the blonde die? She got swallowed whole by a 1,000-foot scorpion.

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What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

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Why couldn't the blind man drive? His sight impairment made him unable to fulfill the task without harming himself and potentially other people.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he accidently dropped it.

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Why are Black Guys Black? Migration and adaptation to the harsh heat of the southern Sahara Desert. DUH.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 was a pussy.

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What did Hitler say to the black jew? Get to the back of the oven

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Why couldn't little Tiffany play kickball with the other kids at recess? I chopped her legs off.

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What do you get if you have 59 apples in your right hand and 74 pints of ice cream in your right? Large hands.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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