Cover myself in Vaseline and cry in the dark for 4, maybe 5 hours with or without a wooden splintery dildo in my arse..”

What's worse than losing a basketball game by 1 point? Dying of lukemia.

Why is a bulldog so aggressive Because it was raised for dog fights in basements Dog fights aren't right kids, and you should never get involved but if you find yourself in the cage fighting one of the dogs, you should really think about how you got there.

throbbing slobber

What do you call a rich black person? A: Oprah

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

What does a tree and a human have in common? They both fall if you chop them with an axe.

Whats worse than a dead baby? 6 million dead Jews.

You know your in Houston when... The highway sign says so.

Why did the chicken cross the road??? Suicide.

Why did the Russian take a boat ride? Well this isn't possible because we all know that in Soviet Russia, boat ride you.

If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Deteriorate

Why does fowlerville suck cause everyone wishes they were black

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

Q: What is the difference between a smart blonde and a UFO? A: One is a human while the other is an unidentified flying object.

You had better thumbs up this post.

swag

When is a door not a door? When your house burns down.

Why did the baby stop laughing? Would you if you pooped your pants?

What did the dead baby say to his mother? Nothing. He's dead.

Why was the asian boy made fun of in the locker room? Because of the nipple piercing he had.

what did the tree say to the person? nothing trees cant talk

Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

What do giant panda bears eat? giant bamboo

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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