my mom died because she was morbidly obese

A man walks into a bar and orders some grapes. The bartender says he does not have any grapes available. The man leaves.

knock knock who's there your family just died your family just died who? -.-

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heads up!

Why did the man poop his pants. becuase he had to poop.

Did you know Helen Keller had a Playground in her back yard? Neither did she.

What is the definition of child abuse? Ms Bazan

You know what isn't funny? Getting punched in the face. You know what is funny? Brittany Spears getting punched in the face.

What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.

Why couldn't the Asian man drive very well? He was blind from birth.

Whats better then a guard llama two Guard llamas

What did the policeman say to the chav? Dickhead!

a guy walks into a bar. he suffered a severe concussion. BECAUSE THE BAR A POLE

A man went in for a doctors appointment and said, "Doc, it hurts when I do this." The doctor responded, "Try to abstain from from putting stress on that area. It might alleviate the pain a bit."

What kind of coins to you find at the bottom of the ocean? Wet coins.

-Knock Knock -Whos there? -The police -OH SHIT

What did the fat kid get for chirstmas? diabetes

Why did the man throw his son out the window? His house was on fire

Roses are red. Violets are grey. People hate me. Mongoose.

A man walks off the top of a very tall building. Why did he fall off? Because he was blind

The boy wakes up and says "I'm feeling kind of fishy today." The dad come into the sea anemone and says that's because you are, Nemo.

why did dominic buy a new speaker on holiday because his parents died and his was at home

Two drums and a cymbol fall off a cliff... ba bum BUM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA it used to be ba dum ching but im so funny that i changed it to ba dum bum. credit to Alex H

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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