Here's a little diddy I wrote for One Direction: Now One Direction, don't forget that we all know About the antics that you pull at your own live shows Like you take your own lyrics and give 'em a swerve Now they either make no sense or make you sound like pervs And Liam, why you swiping cameras and phones? What you need a girl's number cause you're crusin alone? And another thing, it's a frickin spoon for God's sake What did this thing impale your puppy with a giant frickin stake? And so One Direction, we now all think That in about a year, y'all are gonna go N*SYNC and disappear cause N*SYNC isn't around any...aw you know!

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Why did the black man jump off the cliff? He was in a spiraling depression due to recently being laid off at work, his troubled home life, and the recent death of his sister.

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? Because he's dead.

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A man goes to an amusement park. He heads straight for the roller-coaster and gets in line. When he gets to the front, the ride operator informs him that he is too short to ride. "You must be at least 48 inches, sir, you just barely miss the mark, I'm sorry, I can't let you ride." The man is sad, but he doesn't let this little discrepancy ruin his day. He then gets in line for a different ride.

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Haikus are awesome, but sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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What did the German say the the Jewish man? "Hello, nice to meet you."

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Whats big orange and likes to eat rocks? a big orange rock eater

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Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. They all fall on a small boy below, putting him into a 20-year coma.

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" ding dong " person in side: wait aren't u supposed to knock knock

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What has two arms and two legs? A human being.

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Why was the American patriot sad that Bin-Laden was killed? Because he wanted to take him back to America to touture him.

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Fun Fact getting married to your first cousin is legal in CT... bet you thought there was joke coming right about now..........

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i homeless man asked for ome change. he didnt get any because people were afraid he would spend it on drugs

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Why was the kid hungry? Because he lived in Africa.

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A man is shipwrecked on a desert island. One day, he finds an old lamp. When he rubs it, a genie appears. The genie says, "You have freed me. As a reward, I will grant you three wishes." The man smacks himself in the face and mutters, "Oh god, I'm seeing genies now. I must be delirious from lack of food and water." Several hours later, he dies.

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Two men are in a bar. One of them turns to the other one and says, "I've slept with your mom." The other one replies "Go home dad you're drunk."

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What do you call a blue bucket? A blue bucket. What do you call a red bucket? A blue bucket in disguise.

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my gave me a game i said thank you

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Q: you know whats a good movie? A: twilight.

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What did the two best friends do before the asteroid hit the Earth? They hugged each other goodbye.

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Two guys walk into a bar. They have drinks, pay for them, then get into a car crash killing a mom and her daughter returning home from selecting a wedding dress. The wedding is canceled. Rate This Comment 0

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What do you call two mexicans playing basketball? Friends

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What's funny about water, food, and shelter? Nothing, those are essential necessities to live your life, unless you have chains attached to your ankles with bricks on the other end and you're thrown in the middle of the ocean with no chance what so ever

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Onions are like loved ones... They are both nouns. And you cry when you cut into them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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