If life gives you lemons, get some seeds from them and plant them. Then in a few years you'll have a lemon tree. Then take some lemons off that tree and throw them at people saying "Here's your stupid lemons, people".

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are you MC Donald's because I'm lovin' it!

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If life gives you lemonade.

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What do you call a white man who murdered his whole family? -a murder What do you call a black man who raped five women? -a rapest What do you call a Mexican with a leaf blower -a hardworking legal immigrant working twelve hours seven days a week to support his wife and three children.

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What's the same between a mole and an eagle? They both live underground, except for the eagle.

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? To get home.

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

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Yo mama's so fat that they have to grease the door frame and hold a twinky on the other side to get her through.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? ruh-ruh-blah-blah-bluh

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how many gay men can you fit on a barstool 1

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why did the plane crash ? Because a loaf of brad was flying it, and Loaves of bread don't fly planes

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knock knock who's there? penis in penis in who? penis in you

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Simon says, "I'll give you a five second head start before I mow you down with my AK47."

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yo mamas so ugly she makes blind children cry

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How many babies does it take to tile a roof? Depends how thinly you slice them

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What's worse than spending time with Inlaws? Spending time with outlaws.

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Why did the Jewish population diminish in the '40s? Showers and Ovens

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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what makes a knight in shining armor a knight in shining armor? he has to have armor and be a knight.

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Hi my name is Jim

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yo mama so dumb she got hit by a parked car. ~YN~

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To try and beat the oncoming car.

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Why did the girl cry? i took her happy meal.

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How dead people are in a graveyard? All of them

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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