I am hot he is not can you beleive it I got shot

Roses are red violets are blue you're the middle child no one cares about you

What happens when Helen Keller plays badminton? She doesn't win because she threw out her back playing Ultimate Frisbee the weekend prior.

(A man in a dark van pulls up)... Hey kids can you come help me find my puppy? The kids get in the car and they find the puppy in a near by park. The kids are then safely returned home.

What's worse than hitting your thumb with a hammer? Getting your spine ripped off

You stink so bad that you should cleanse yourself via shower and/or bath.

What do you call a blonde with a diploma? Dum,because blondes are still dum

what is the diffrence between a chinesse man and a japanesse man, one is ruled by a cruel communist leader.

So a horse walks into a bar, animal service is called and after being unable to locate the owner he is put down.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I dunno, that's why I asked you.

What would Jesus say if he was alive today? “Nehwê tzevjânach aikâna d'bwaschmâja af b'arha.”

What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

Why couldn't the boy in the wheelchair sue the man making fun of him? Because he couldn't get up the stairs to court.

The word you are looking for is charm, not seduction, I am above such things, and while I have no reason whatsoever to believe either one of us can gain anything from going "eye for an eye", I am sure I can offer whatever financial and even specialized assistance you might require in order to get that eye of yours seeing clearer than before... Worry not, I shall outlaw the name Nero and all the derivations and similarities from my Order, unless someone named Nero actually happens to come by of course...

Q: What do you get when you cross and owl with a bungie cord? A: My ass

I used to be schizophrenic, but we're ok now.

Why did the mans nuts itch he had crabs

How do you cause ultimate pain to a imprisoned Jew during the holocaust? Moral: You give him an apple WITH a worm in it.

what is the differance between a toyata and a van full of dead babies I dont own a toyata

What's black and looks like Burnt Popcorn? A black man

Q:If quizes are, "guizicles," then what are tests? A:Who calls quizes, "quizicles?"

why do people put their pants on in the morning? because their not nudists.

How do you get a clown of a swing set U hit it with an ax 2.5 times

"I just don't understand the difference between yours and mines." "Well, you see, yours belong to you, whereas mines explode when you step on them."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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