What did Michael Jackson get for Christmas? Nothing he's dead

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some men like Cheese, I have aids.

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Whats worse then the Holocaust? Chlamydia.

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Q:Why did the black man shoot the white man? A:The black man happened to be extremely good at paintball.

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What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it's a grape and therefore unable to speak.

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How do you have gay sex? I don't know ask Jordan Braun

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a woman walks into a stall with her five yr old daughter. as the mom starts to due her buisness the girl looks down and asks her mom "Mommy why do u have a beard on ur pe-pe?"

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Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are white And Pansies hold hands and skip

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So when I came home from work the other day, I saw tha my dog was foaming at the moth, so I took him to the vet It turns out that my dog didn't have a thing for marshmallows but had rabies instead and was promptly put down.

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Once there was Girl whose Teeth were Crooked. She got Braces.

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How do you act when you discover that the 'Submit' button doesn't work? Wait for a while until the problem fixes itself and you are able to perform the desired function.

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10 years ago we had Steve Jobs, Bob Hope, and Jonny Cash. Now we have?

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How do you make a chicken laugh. By showing it how to cross the road

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I told my friend one of these anti-jokes, he took it seriously and beat my head with a bat.

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Q. Whats blue and looks like a bucket? A. a blue bucket Q. whats green and looks like a bucket? A. a blue bucket in disguise.

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Whatever their names happen to be.

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How do you catch an elephant? Dig a nice deep hole in the ground, and fill it with ashes. Next, line the outside of the hole with peas. When the elephant comes to take a pea, kick it in the ash hole.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? The IRS.

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Wherever you left it

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Twelve muffins were baking in an oven. One muffin said "Where are we?" Another muffin said "Yikes! A talking muffin!"

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-Your mom worked as a prostitute and died a virgin.

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What happened to the homeless guy when a woman gave him five dollars? He shot the woman because he is mentally retarded.

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My grandmother's zodiac sign was cancer, and she was killed by a giant crab.

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What did the tractor say to the farmer? Nothing, tractors don't talk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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