a man walks into a bar several people leave as they can see the potential danger in the situation. - the man (also so known as a hippo) was Matt Ross

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How do you know it's a bad day? When your brain does not release a high enough level of seratonin.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was unaware that it could get run over by a motor vehicle.

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Q: What's the worst part about being a black Jew? A: You have to sit at the back of the oven.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The KGB Yes, How can I help? We are looking for a local serbian mobster who we believe to be hiding in this Village have you seen this man. No I cant say I have. Sorry Well thank you for your time and if you notice anything please try and let the local Police know.

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I was driving to Wal-Mart the other day and I saw a black man in a white Murcielago. I thought to myself that he must be doing good. Because everything he owns is white..... dick

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Can you guess the following words? Boo*s s*x *orn g*y cu*t b*tch Answers: Books, six, horn, guy, cult, batch.

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What happened after a Mexican drank 4 shots? He got drunk and died in a car accident.

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Two black guys walked into a bar. And they killed everybody.

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How do you say hooker in Chinese? ?

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What do you do with a dog with no legs? Take it for a drag.

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Doctor doctor, i think i need glasses! Go to an opticians then...

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What can a pizza do that a Jew can't? Pizzas can't do anything, so the answers are infinite.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It thought they were playing follow the leader. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? It had no arms. Why did the little girl fall off her tricycle? She was hit by three monkeys and a refrigerator.

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What did the orphan get for christmas........Cancer

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Whats better than sitting here writing anti jokes? Sitting in ENGLISH and writing anti jokes. Shoutout to Link Deas

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why did the black boy fail out of high school? Because his grades were bad.

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A man walks into a bar. Then he buys a beer.

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Pineapples have a smaller volume than the sun

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Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

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What's worse than eating a piece of elephant shit? Eating two pieces of elephant shit.

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What do you call a person who dies in march A dead person

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What do you call a man will dementia who just killed his cousins, wife, children, and teacher. His name. He's still a man until he's put in a mental institution.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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