roses are red violets are blue count my five damn finger , and the third one is for you!!!!!!!!

Your Mamas So Fat That When She Jumped Into The Ocean All The Whales Swam Around And Started Sinqinq (We Are Family Even Though Your Fatter Than Me.)xD

Why did the chicken cross the road? it was wandering and had no idea wht it was doing because it has very little mental capacity whatsoever

Roses are red Violets are blue NO SHIT EINSTEIN!

There are too many 20 year olds getting pregnant. Teenage pregnancy is ruining our society!

What's the worse thing O.J. Simpson has gotten away with? Running a red light

We're out of mustard, so in your sandwich I used some yellow liquid dripping from a dying rhinoceros.

A man buy's a new lawn mower, it breaks so he takes it back. The shopworker says that if you don't have a recipt then you cannot replace it, the man goes home and months later catch's a flu.

Knock Knock Who's there? *silence* Silence Who?

Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is black

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

Pen15

What did the deaf man say to the blind man? Look out there's a bus in front of you

Yes.

Ring Around The rosy, Pockets full of posey, Just kidding they are roofies and i'm going to rape you

Q: What's the difference between a vampire and a lawyer? A: A lot of things.

wanna hear a joke. i do to

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she was deaf and blind and would have been a hazard to herself and others.

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in an oven.

I ponder

Ring. Ring. Hello? Hey, It's Sean Oh hi! How are you?

What did the bi-polar girl do when she found our her ex-boyfriend was living with another woman? Nothing; she was happy for their new relationship and realized life moves on, in addition to taking the appropriate amount of medicine as directed by her doctor for her condition.

when chuck norris plays call of duty, his only perk is ghost pro.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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