What is green, walks on four legs, and is capable of the strongest bite in the world? An alligator.

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What do you call a fat man that breaks into your house at 2 a.m. and steals your money and your television? Probably a dumbass, a jackass, a moron, an idiot, or something in that general area.

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Why can't Hellen Keller watch Spongebob? She doesn't have the proper cable service

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Why didn't little jimmy take out the trash? He is a rock

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What did Jesus say to the Easter Rabbit? Nothing, it ran off before he could say anything. They're so skiddish, those pesky rabbits...

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When you wish upon a star... You are only seeing the light of that star, which has taken billions of years to travel here. The star that you are looking at has most likely dead, Just like your dreams.

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Roses are grey. Violets are a different shade of grey. Let's go chase cars. -Dog

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? I don't Know, but we should inform the RSPCA.

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What do you call black people in a church, Holy shit

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.

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Waitress: Would you like to have a drink? Customer: (Looks at the drink's menu) Hmmmm... What are my choices? Waitress: Yes and no.

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what does a blue watermelon and a cactus that looks like a penis have in common? orange ya glad i didn't say banana!

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-Knock Knock -Who is it? -Your father, i forgot my keys.

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Knock Knock Good one...

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On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me... Nothing, because I'm single.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead-

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Hummer.

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What do you call a black priest? Holy Crap

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Black people are ugly. They should not live in this world. They are apes. They should live as apes not humans. Why do they have ugly curly hair, fat lips, and a big flat nose? SO UGLY!! EWW

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DON'T TOUCH MY DUCK, IT HAS A ONE DOLLAR BILL

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it can do whatever the hell it wants

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why did your mom die? Cuz i killed her

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Why did the black man go to the store with a gun? He recently bought it a couple days before to go hunting, but it wasn't working correctly.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a strong drink Bartender: Why the long face Man: My wife was recently killed in a horrible car accident Bartender: Oh my god, I'm so sorry Man: Jks I have AIDS

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops