Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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What's the difference between Jews and pizza? God likes pizza

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? The bench can support a family of 4?

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: Why did the lizard fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the moneky

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Why didn't the blonde get into college? She was killed in a car accident.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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What is the cow doing? Because 7,8,9

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A duck walks into a bar- nope, just chuck testa...

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Why did Billy kill Joey? Joey had sex with Billy's wife... and Billy wanted revenge.

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who ate all the food in zimbabwe? Nick bigg.. he later died of cancer and aids

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What's worse than a fake bomb? Do I really have to answer that?

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How do you wake up lady gaga? You set her alarm clock for a reasonable hour.

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what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

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Q: What did one dog say to the other dog? A: "Bitch!"

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What did the frog say when it was attacked? Ribbit.

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raising eyebrows to expose eyes can also be a signal of attraction ('I'm looking at you, gorgeous. Can you see?').

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What's a black man's favorite food? It depends.

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Whats white and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator

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A man walked into the woods with alzheimers......pancakes

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Why didnt sally throw out her lunch? Her mom had a miscarriage, she was never born.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems Nice tits

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What did the west African get for his birthday? Ebola

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knock knock piss off

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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