Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side.

Why did the car cross the road? Green light

So last night I was f**king my girlfriend and I flip her over and f**k her up the ass. Later we're sitting having a cigarette when she says, "you know it was pretty presumptuous of you to think you can just flip me over and f**k me up the ass." And I said, "presumptuous!? That's a pretty big word for a 5th grader."

Q. Why can’t a teacher lift weights? A. Because, most teachers are women and most women do not enjoy It.

- I was at my house last night - I was at your MOM'S house last night... I'm her neighbor, she was having trouble with her plumbing and I thought i should help out

Why can't Ray Charles read? Because he's black.

A police man pulls over a blonde for speeding. The policeman tells her she was speeding and starts to write a ticket. She get emotional and begins to cry. He writes the ticket, she signs it, and she drives off.

How do you scare a lawyer? Threaten to kill his family.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have cancer, How 'bout you?

Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

What's the difference between a whore and a blonde? There is not enough information to answer this question.

what is bad about being a black jew? you have to sit in the back of the oven

What do you call a disabled Jew? His name

Knock knock. Who's there? The police, you murdered ten people.

Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell into the mud.

A: Knock knock. B: Who's there? A: I am.

okay, there was a donkey and a parrot walking at the park. When it was raining the donkey says to parrot hey why is it so hot. Then a person riding bikes come to the parrot and she told her to sit down. Nobody saying hello but she can dance reallly nicely.

How does a Welshman take a shit? Like anyone other human being does.

What is the biggest killer in America? Death.

what happened to the boy that walked down the street he got hit by a falling street light

69, Is funny because the numbers are backwards

Q: What goes up but doesn't come down? A: Columbia

What do a black person and a monkey have in common? A. They both are organism that need food and water to survive.

Why did the bones cross the street? They didn't. The dogs ate them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...