What do you call a blonde with half a brain? A person with light, yellowish hair who has a tragic genetic deformity.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

John: Do you like Cake? Sue: Yes. John: Alright.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

DIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEDIEDIEDIEIDEIDIEIDEIIDIE DIE all of you Hahahaha

thumb_up thumb_down +30

How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit it in the face with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Shit happens. Correction: feces happens.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why didn't the little boy believe in Santa Clause? Because' he saw his parents putting presents under the tree, and saw his over weight father eat all the cookies.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

I used to take arrows to the knee but then I didn't, for no particular reason.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

what do you call an overweight 80 year old white man trying to be a pimp ? Mr.Fredrickson

thumb_up thumb_down +48

How do you make Sasuke cry? Kill his family

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did children rejoice when Michael Jackson died? Because they were at a birthday party, and only heard about his death afterward.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What is the difference between a doorknob? Toast.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Hay is for horses and other hay consuming mammals.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the doctor say to the recently diagnosed AIDS patient? I'm sorry there is nothing we can do.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

knock knock. who's there greench greench who greenchicken feathers

thumb_up thumb_down +11

whats worse then finding a finger in your soup? - being a cook and losing a finger

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Jonny runs with scissors. He gets hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

why did the giraffe cross the road? because my dad and his "fishing buddies" are having another "meeting" in the basement. I hear weird noises, and I haven't seen my little sister in weeks, since the last "meeting." Dad said she went to a special camp for little girls. I hear horrible noises.

thumb_up thumb_down +71

I love results day! for every A* I get 30 pounds! everything else I cut myself.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

why did victor have a tube on his neck he was helping james with security

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why was the Tyrannosaurus Rex such an aggressive animal? it had short arms so it could not masturbate.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What is a man? A misserable little pile of shi... Moral: What is a man?

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Your mom is so fat her daily calorie intake is dangerously above the recommended 2000 per day.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why doesn't superman eat peanuts? Because he doesn't like them.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops