A guy walked up to me and said "I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam, I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam." I promptly informed the authorities. He was transported to a mental institution and I later learned that he swallowed his own tongue and died. Nobody attended his funeral.

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What is the difference between 1000 dead babies and a Cadillac? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage.

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Did you hear the joke about the vacuum? It sucks.

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How do a jew, an African, and u white man stop a train? They pull the breaks

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Knock knock (who's there) Orange ( orange who) orange you glad to see

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How do you get rid of a pile of dead babies? Call 911 so someone will pick them up and take them to the morgue.

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Whats worse than sour milk? 911. Whats worse than 911? drinking sout milk!

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What's the difference between a dead dog lying in the middle of the street and a dead black man lying in the middle of the street? The physical differences you would commonly expect to be between a human being and a dog.

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THUMBS THIS DOWN AND I WILL KILL YOU! TOTAL PEOPLE DIED FROM THUMBING THIS DOWN: 147289347809237489

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Knock, knock. Knock, knock. Knock, knock. Guess no ones home.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Today I'll wear a hat on my head Instead of a shoe.

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A mormon walked into a bar and realised it was a bar the he leaves

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How many babies does it take to paint a barn red It depends how hard you throw them

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Why couldn't little sally swim? Because she had weights on her ankles.

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I once saw a small Italian man wearing trainers with a smart suit. He looked like an idiot, but I considered the option that he may not have had any money left after buying the suit to buy shoes. Exercising diplomacy, I left him be and enjoyed a nice meal with he and his trainers.

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Q: What do you get when you cross Rebecca Black and a day of the week. A: a stupid song called FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Why the guy without two hands at the beach was so excited? Because he couldn't scratch his asshole.

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What's the difference between getting hit by a car and being struck by lightning? Impossible to tell, they are 2 entirely different circumstances with limited certainties.

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what do you call a brown man that has been repeatedly shanked and has been fucked up the arse by 10 Rag heads in one night and thrown in a well to slowly and painfully die? Lloyd.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To look at the most interesting man in the world.

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Why was the Islamic woman killed? She insulted Allah.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Actually they're purple That's why they're called "violets"

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What do you call 10 black people swimming down a current? A happy family

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Why did Osama bin Laden cross the road? To get shot in the face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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