what did the scene kid get for christmas? a gift card which he used ironically.

Did you know Helen Keller had a swing set in her backyard? Neither did she.

Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homo-sexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

What's the most stupid thing you have ever heard? Woman's Studies.

LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop 397, IF you have a big tounge

A rebellious teenage boy throws a dozen eggs on the street, now he has no eggs.

What do you call a man with no legs and no arms on your doorstep? Matt

what has one ear, one leg, one eye, one arm, and is Jewish half a Jew

i like punching orphans in the face, you wanna know why? what are they gonna do? tell their parents???

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Why does Santa live in the north pole? Because his spicy body fat keeps him warm.

Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

What did Tarzan say to the elephant?... "Hi elephant." A few weeks later, the elephant had grown a mustache and gotten a pair of sunglasses. What did Tarzan say to him then?... Nothing, he didn't recognize him.

Once upon a time there was a boy who got ran over by a truck. No one cared.

Q: Who lives in a pinaple under the sea? A: Garry

what has a huge nose and is jewish??? Henery Miller!!!!!

If life gives you lemons.... Life is an abstract noun not a physical object so it can not give you lemons.

How did Moses make his tea? He steeped the tea leaves for around 5 minutes in hot water.

What's the difference between a dead black man in the road, and a dead dog in the road? One is a human being that probably leaves behind family and friends that will miss his absence. The other is an animal that will also be missed, but to a lesser degree since dogs don't form a bond with people other than the family it shared its life with. In either of the two cases, if I witnessed the accident that caused the death, I would promptly notify the authorities so as to make sure that the driver of the vehicle that hit them would be subjected to a breathalyzer test.

Roses are red violets are blue when i flush the toilet i see you :)

Q)A man and a women are hiking on a mountain trail. A bear appears. What do they do? A) Die.

Dad: "When I was your age, I had to walk outside to catch the school bus. If it snowed heavily the night before, school was canceled."

A Jewish man overhears another man making a joke about the Holocaust. The Jew says, "Hey! You! My father died in the Holocaust!" The other man says, "Oh, I'm sorry. What camp was he in?" The Jew says, "Camp? No, my father had a heart attack."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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