What's big, brown, and full of crap? A septic tank.

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I don't do cocaine I just like the smell

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Whats big, yellow and red? a school bus with a bunch of dead children.

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husband : honey , can i have stuff candy wife : no husband : can i have milk and cookies wife : what kind of milk wink wink husband 2% you pervert

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what's black and white and red all over? nothing... it's red

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Why did the man known to his neighbors as 'Teetotal Al' buy himself a bottle of whisky? Because there was no factual basis to his nickname.

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What's worse than burning your bacon? Finding your daughter decapitated and raped in the basement.

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Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Eating the apple.

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How do you drown a blond? You hold her underwater.

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A black guy, a priest, and a rabbi all walk into a bar. They order water and chat about life.

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why did chuck norris walk on water? because he's chuck norris

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Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock The person you are seeking is deaf and cannot hear the sound that is made when your knuckles come in contact with the door. Try calling next time..........

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Women's Rights

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Why did Alex die? He choked on a semi truck

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How do you kill a blonde? lightsabre to the throat should do it

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A blonde, ginger, and brunette took the SAT. They all performed successfully and were admitted into their colleges of choice.

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How did the retarded, blind child win the Special Olympics? He didn't, he died of terminal lung cancer the year before. R.I.P.

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What begins with "F" and ends in "uck"? There are multiple words or word combinations that begin with "F" and end in "uck," such as fat duck, so you dont need me to tell you, be creative.

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Did you know Hellen Keller's dog ran away? You would have to if your name was RaAeltraERKAERMaelaefa

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http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&cd=1&ved=0CAsQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fhomepage.eircom.net%2F~cronews%2Felep%2Felep.html&ei=1aAjVMrJJcePoQS99ILADg&usg=AFQjCNEy4qvnhug3LTGYLGylpoRhxjk_zg

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What's worse than hitting your funny bone? Nothing

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they say that if you commit suicide, you have done nothing wrong. does that mean hitler did nothing wrong?

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What did Billy get his parents for Christmas? Billy's an orphan.

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How much wood could a Woodchuck chuck if a Woodchuck could chuck wood? The etymology of the name woodchuck is unrelated to wood or chucking

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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