Here is a nursery rhyme: Jane is a scruff, she has a head full of nits. She also had pain in her great big... Now don't get excited. Don't be mislead. Because all that Jane had was a pain in her head!

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Why doesn't Julius Caesar ever use a cell phone? Because he died in 44 BC.

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why was the baby crying? cause his abusive father broke his arm.

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why did the black man go to jail why he raped your mom

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Today I'll wear a hat on my head Instead of a shoe.

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Congratulations, sir. The judge has determined that the charges of traffic violation against you were indeed incorrect, and you will be given a large sum of cash for your wasted time.

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And Judas approached the rabbis and Pharisees saying, "The one whom I kiss is the one you seek. " To which they responded, "Gay. "

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How did Princess Diana cross the road? Through the windshield

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What is the difference between a priest and a nun? Cant you see the nun is dead you insensitive bastard!

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What's Green and flies? Super Grapes cousin Super Grape

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What did the Man say to the elephant Nothing this man does not speak, the elephant does though

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Cause she's a woman

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what do u call something black and hanging from a tree.............................. a black guy

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Why did the Skyrim guard stop adventuring? He was killed in action and his family misses him terribly.

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What's long and black? A black hockey stick.

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Why does a squid have 8 legs? It doesn't, it has 8 tentacles!

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How many immature people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 69

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What do you call an Arab on an airplane? A passenger.

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What do you call two men having sex with Oprah? Group sex.

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I suck at online but have a high gamerscore

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What did the lady find when she walked through the door? Her husband stabbing himself to death because she ate his cornflakes

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A Hideo Kojima AntiJoke Typed by Hideo Kojima. Idea By Hideo Kojima. Concept By Hideo Kojima Spacing by Hideo Kojima Controlled for typos by Hideo Kojima Overseen By Hideo Kojima Aproved By Hideo Kojima. Reconsidered By Hideo Kojima Accepted by Hideo Kojima What took you so long?

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What's sweaty, fat, and Italian? Italians

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How did the comedian end his show with a bang? He shot 4 people in the audience. It was a horrible sight and the remainder of the people in the audience were scarred for life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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