Pete and Repeat were on a boat. Pete jumped out, who was left? Pete, the boat blew up and instantly killed repeat

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A blind man walks into a bar. It was a book shop.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Jimmy: Knock Knock Nick: Whose there? Jimmy: Joe Nick: Joe Who? Jimmy: Joe Mamma Nick: No shes dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A black guy, mexican, and asian walk into a bar. They leave soon after because they heard the "one about them"

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why do you care?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats the difference between a waffle and a pancake? One is made in a waffle iron. And the other is made on a pan.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

bill: HEY! your moma so fat bob:so i dont care shes gonna die soon anyway

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: What was the proctologist doing on the street? A: He was observing the assfault.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

If you throw a violist and a soprano off a cliff, which one would hit the ground first? Who cares?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Two men drove their car of a cliff. They died.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A man in a wheelchair walks into a bar... ...wait a second.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Two cows are standing on the top of North Pole and in a half-inch wind they're spanking a bottle of coconut jam. Suddenly two infrared gallopping fly past them. What's the consequence? That people shouldn't use freshly peeled lemoncakes on underwater cornfields.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

why were the little boy's clothes all wet? because they found his body in the bottom of a river.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Your friend is so gay that he isn't attracted to hot women

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's worse than the holocaust? The holocaust was one of the most terrible incidents in history there are very few things worse than.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? One, its not a difficult task.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Whats worse than contracting H.I.V.? nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "Only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call an Asian guy doing homework? A student

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

thumb_up thumb_down +26

An slutty attractive secretary went into her boss' office He killed her.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

My friend asks me what my mom does for a living and i told him that she is a nurse. Then he says "That a good job because she is able to save lives". I quickly reply "She works in an abortion clinic".

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do stop a clown from laughing? Hit in the face with a hatchet.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops