Why did the man die? because he hit his head and drowned

Why is the sky blue? Well it has something to do with The suns reflection off of all the waters on earth's surface.

Your mom is so fat that her every day life if a struggle and she has to get gastric bypass surgery or else she is going to die

68 :)

Johan showering. . . AWK

What did the leper say to the prostitute? "I am an undercover police office and you're under arrest for prostitution, ma'am."

a horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face" the horse says "my son was just diagnosed with multiple sclerosis"

This time I saw it, so that is covert hypnosis, I mean normally people are aware that they are under a trance, but like now it was like huh? Until the last point there. You used caps in order to make it seem as if you where shouting, the mind reacts that way and bam! The hypnotic state leaves... ...I was kinda beginning to enjoy that... Nice, now I totally do not want to eat this thing, strawberry my butt.

So Joe Paterno doesn't walk into a police station....

Mitt Romney

Roses are red Tulips are blue Wait, no sorry That's violets.

Why did the TV fall of a cliff? Because a nice man was donating it to the homeless shelter which hangs over a cliff. The man placed the TV in the back room on the floor. There was a weak spot on the floor and when the fattest homeless person walked over the floor, the floor broke which was a HUGE inconvenience because he TV and the fat man fell through the floor and over the cliff, luckily the TV was plugged in so it was hanging by the cord but an old lady with Alzheimer's forgot that there was a hole in the floor and unplugged the TV so she could clean the switches. In the end the TV fell off the cliff.

What happened when an atheist burned down the home of a priest? He was arrested, charged with arson and sentenced to 5 years in prison.

CAOIMHIN JUST BE QUITE

Why did the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't become rotisserie with a side of hash brown.

What did the text-to-speech reader say when the 12 year old boy played around with it? "Ass ass ass ass, ass ass ass ass."

Why did the chicken cross the road? Systemic oppression.

Knock Knock Come in

Why are black people faster than white people? They are descended from a lineage where athleticism was more greatly selected for in the evolutionary process.

How did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it died. how did the second monkey fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the other monkey.

24!

A guy walks up to a midget and he says: 'What do you want to be when you grow up?'

McDonald. It's run by Lawers

Why didn't the black boy get any presents from Santa? Because he isn't real.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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