Why doesn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead

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Why didn't Lucas want to go down the slide? He was scared.

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Why did the all black baseball team beat the all white baseball team? Because the black team scored more runs than the white team.

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guys ive got a TANK under my house a septic tank

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Why do black people eat at KFC? Because KFC serves good food at reasonable prices.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Muslim? -You can research and find several similarities and differences, but I will not go into detail about them.

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You are on a street. there are 4 houses, a red one, a blue one, a green one, and a white one. The red man lives in the red house, the blue man lives in the blue house. the green man lives in the green house. Who lives in the white house? The president

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what do you call a mexican baptism? a bean dip

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What is the difference between an Australian and an Ethiopian? One is from Australia the other is from Ethiopa

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse doesn't reply because horses don't speak. However, he is confused and scared by the unfamiliar surroundings. Trying to escape, the horse breaks his leg. The horse must be put down.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Whos there Not Susie What did Susie get for Christmas? I don't know , she never opened it. Who high fived Susie? No one Why did Susie die? She got shot in the face

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what leaves a bigger memory than a passionate kiss? A STAB WOUND!

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How does Fred drink his milk? -computer

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Why was the dinosaur laughing so hard? He heard a very humorous joke

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Knock knock! Who's there? A Doorbell salesman.

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What does a kid with no arms and legs get for christman.... Cancer...

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A man drives home from a bar one night, He is under the influence and his reckless driving will costs many innocent people their lives.

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If god himself had a religion he would be a self centered bastard.

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Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him and got better.

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What's better than Justin Bieber's new hit single, "Baby"? Everything

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Q. Wherefore art thou Romeo? A. Global Warming. ,.

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What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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