Why did the chicken cross the road? To be eaten.

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A penguin is driving through Arizona when his car's oil pressure light comes on. He drops his car off with a mechanic who says he'll get to it soon, and to come back in an hour. The penguin leaves the garage and, seeing a Baskin-Robbins across the street, stops in and orders a dish of ice cream. As he eats the ice cream he reflects on the series of extraordinary events that led him to this place, this time, this situation.

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What do you get when you cross a joke and a rhetorical question?

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Two penguins were taking a bath. One said "pass the soap." The second penguin replied, "What do you think I am, a typewriter?"

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why did the turtle beat the rabbit ? because the rabbit eventually got shot

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Freddie Mercury died of AIDS. Many consider him a musical hero.

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What did the Dildo say to the banana? Nothing, unless you're high on acid.

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Yo momma is so ugly, she might not win the "America's next top model" contest.

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Hair

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Tim likes girls

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when the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that's a black eye.

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Sometimes sentences just don't end the way that you think they potato

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knock knock who's there Bob oh hi, come in

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Why did the plane crash? Because, it's pilot was a bagel.

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So a baby seal walks into a club

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Man says, "Hello" Girl, "Do you wanna go out?" Man, "With you?" Girl, "YES!" Man, "NO, bye!"

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ohai. whutz en ahntei johk? sownz soopihd.

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Why did the man pick the flower? Because he didn't like flowers.

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Why was the prison full of black people? Because they were all their for security internships.

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A guy walks into a bar. The bartneder says, "Wow, buddy, you look awful. What's wrong?" The guy responds, "My life is a joke."

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Why is Chuck Norris so frickin awesome? He just is cause he's chuck norris

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12 in general

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because i shot him. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? he was in front of the monkey

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Why did the dog die? I beat him with a bat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops