How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

What Did The Hobo Get For Christmas? A Welcome Home Mat.

Why couldn't the man walk? Because his leg is broken.

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

why did the bear cross the road? to get cream cheese.

What did the rake say to the shovel? Nothing, they're both inanimate objects.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, He has died, And now will you,

Why can't black people swim? Because most African American individuals grow up in inner urban cities where they have little or no access to swimming facilities.

Your momma is so dumb... that when she took an IQ test she score pretty low on it.

Q: What genre is the bible? A: Si-fi

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm colorblind.

What sits in the corner of room and gets smaller and smaller? A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler

Is your friend gay? Yeah, duh, of course he's happy.

raising eyebrows to expose eyes can also be a signal of attraction ('I'm looking at you, gorgeous. Can you see?').

Ya Mums so fat when she stood on the scales it came up with my phone number

What's the difference between a turtle and a horse? The horse has no shell.

Simon Cowell's hair is real.

How did jimmy get hurt?? someone throw a fridge at him..

Whats the difference between football and basketball? Absolutely everything By darragh Hamilton

Why should you paint a canoe black? Being the darkest color, it will hide dirt, scratches, and normal wear and tear on your canoe better than lighter colors.

Why was the washing machine laughing? Because you're on drugs.

What do you call a supporter of Barrack Obama? A welfare recipient

SCENES WHEN TOM O'SHEA GETS STABBED IN PRISON AFTER STEALING THE WHEELS OFF AN AMBULANCE

Why Jimmy doesn't listen to his mother? Because he's deaf

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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