What's another word for Manslaughter? My new Hobby

thumb_up thumb_down +7

An old man walks into a movie theater, has a stroke, and dies as his family screams for help and attempts to revive him to no avail.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? If you eat a Jew, you're deemed a cannibal and are frowned upon by the majority of society.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A: u wanna die? B: does anyone really wanna die, i mean logistically, un-less u are suicidal, why would you wanna die? A: I do wanna die. B: ur a freak and you should consider getting help person A never got help, on his way to getting help at a certified physician he got hit by a bus, his body can be found at the intersection of church ave. and flatbush. And i would say rest in piece but cars drive over him daily, and thats not to peaceful

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why was the baseball player arrested after stealing a base? Because he pulled out a knife and stabbed the shortstop in the chest.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Your mom is not fat!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Yo mama so fat, her wand is a Slim Jim

thumb_up thumb_down -19

wanna hear a joke? not really

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Why is there a man painted green throwing forks at me

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Q. What is black and nobody cares when they step on it? A. Asphalt

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A man walks up to a gay guy and says "you are socially accepted"

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Hear the one about the giraffe and the clown? Yes.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

a priest and a rabbi are walking down a road together the rabbi says: so your a priest how about that the priest says: fine ive read the bible a few times good book

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Whats worse then getting hit by a truck? Getting hit by a turkey!

thumb_up thumb_down +24

^that joke's not funny

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Q: Knock - Knock A: NO SOLICITORS!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's worse than a pile of dead babies? The one at the bottom is alive. What's worse than that? He's eating his way out. What's worse than that? He came back for seconds.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Study from real life: My trip to Texas. (From the time when I was interested in mormon-ism.) Texan: And here is my gun collection, great for shootin yer Mexican scum. Me: Uh I am Norwegian but my ancestors where Russian or something so my skin is... Texan: *points gun at me and pushes trigger halfways* Just kidding der son, sure you aint no Mexican though? Okay just checkin ya know... Me *sweating bullets* Texan guys gun go off almost hitting me and breaking a vase.. Conclusion: He blamed me, everyone had lunch outside later, everyone kept looking at the "trigger happy MEXICAN"... Nero: By then I began grasping the fact that I was better suited for the study of the dark arts... And also learned that in Mormonism, Heaven and Hell are planets locked into war, where black people where neutral, and red people are demon supporters, but WE CAN ALL BE SAVED BY BECOMING WHITE! JUST LIKE THE ANGEL MORONI! Conclusion two: Moroni... Lol.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

how do you make a clown sad? you push it off a swing.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A circus clown riding the cutest miniture Shetland pony both fall over a cliff and die.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Look down at your keyboard. Notice that U and I are together? <3 Also notice that J and K are together too!:P

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Roses are red Violets are blue I have multiple personality disorder And so do we

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Jimmy said he would never beat his wife, so why did he do it anyway? Because he was a hypocrite.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

whats the capital of congo famine

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops