What do you say if you see your TV floating in the middle of the night? Wow, I need to lighten up on the acid.

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What was the latino gardener doing? Working hard to keep his job in these tough economic times.

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What had 82 eyes, 7 mouths, and sings the blues? Nothing, the described creature does not exist.

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Why did the cow go over the hill? He didn't. He was pinned and slaughtered in a private owned animal torture facility.

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penis

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Whats the difference between Megan Fox and a dead baby? Megan Fox is alive

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What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a Cheetah? A yellow Chuck Norris with black spots.

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Did you hear about Helen Keller's dog? Neither did she.

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Teachers be like "Hold on class, I am almost done with my lesson!" Students: " Aint nobody got time 4 dat!"

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither Has He.

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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What's the difference between a Porche and a Pile of dead babies? I don't have a Porche in my garage.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has AIDS.

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WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

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Your momma is so dumb she'd starve if she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store. -Actually my mom has a pHD in Nutritional Science. If she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store, she'd utilize that knowledge to maintain a balanced diet until a way was made available for her to return home.

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What happens when you hit a black guy with your car? He is seriously injured.

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Well, I guess it's back to the drawing board.

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Q. What's better then a baby in a microwave? A. What the hell is wrong with you? Did your parents not love you enough when you were born? Everything is worse then a baby in a microwave! Besides the felony charges it is extremely wrong! Your going to hell.

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What do you call a bunch of white people walking down a cliff? Avalanche

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roses are red violets are blue i had sex with your dog

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how did superman die? he got cought in a plane engine!

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What starts with F and ends with U-C-K? Firetruck

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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Why did the orange put on the sun block? Because it was afraid of turning into a TAN-gerine!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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