What's worse than standing in line at Walmart? Being raped. What's worse than paying an outrageous amount for whatever it is you bought at Walmart? Being pregnant with a rape baby.

guess what my weiner dog did last night? pooped in my bed

my wife out of the kitchen

What did Superman say when he forgot his cape? "Where's my cape?"

Why did the man throw a clock? In retaliation for his wife having thrown a vase at him. The couple has a history of domestic violence. More than one friend has suggested counselling.

Gas prices are so high, I've had to resort to walking and riding my bike.

What's red, white, and black all over? A panda shot and killed by a poacher.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

why did the donkey kick the men bc he tryed to pen the tail on hes ass

How did the mermaid break her arm? She fell out of a tree.

There were two friends, a girl and a boy. The girl had a ribbon tied to her neck, and every day the boy asked her why, yet she'd never tell him. They grew up together, and fell in love and still, she wouldn't tell him why she had the ribbon on her neck. They got married, and grew old, and still she wouldn't tell him. But one day, she said to him 'I'll show you why I keep this on my neck' and she took it off and her head fell off.

what food wouldn't you take on holiday with you? any its all inclusive

what happened to the 4 year old girl who got stuck in the freezer? She froze.

oh hi, i'm an idiot, i mean mitt romney

Oh wow, I've never seen one that big before. Thats what the 12 year old boy said as he starred at the the Great Pyramid of Pharaoh Khufu.

What's the difference between a black minister and a white priest? Nothing. We're all equal in the eyes of God.

If I have 10 ice cubes and you have 11 apples, how many pancakes can hit the roof? ...Purple!! Because aliens don't wear hats.

Why is there air? To blow up basketballs

What did the douche bag get for Christmas? Your girlfriend.

Q: What's the worst part of 3 Mexicans dying in a car accident? A: They were my friends.

Why is the black guy bad a Hockey? He was raped with a hockey stick by his father, after many years of pain and sex jokes, and the internet meme of the rapey daddy came out, the man then tryed to kill him self, but lived and the became a... shit i forgot, well long story short, it was roger from family guy.

Why was the chicken angry? Because he was tired of everyone questioning his motives.

Mom mom momie mom mom mom mom momie mother mother. What! Hi.

Q: What did the farmer say when he coudn't find his tractor? A: "where's my tractor?"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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