Stare at the person nearest to you and say "sprinkles" with the straightest face possible.

old people are like slinkies...they arent really good for anything but brings a smile to ur face when they're pushed down the stairs...just think about it ;)

What's better than finding a worm in your apple? -The Holocaust

Why did Sally fly off the swing, She had no arms Knock knock *Who's there* Not Sally

whats funnier than a dead baby? many things. a dead baby is a very sad and tragic thing.

One day a man was really horny and wanted to bang his wife that night, so he took soom horns and banged them against her skull until his wife bled to death. He was later sentenced for homocide and to this day has been in prison

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away Because no dog likes being called "hurrrrdhjkdhjsaklhdkhjkddssaduyiwqkhdbewcjk"

A life-sized cardboard cut out of Justin Bieber was in a contest with a cut out of Liam Neeson. It was stiff competition.

How do you get a clown off of a swing? You throw an axe at its face.

Why was 9 afraid of 10 because 10 was a registered sex offender

Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She didn't have any arms.

Q: How many jews can you fit in a car? A: Well, it varies on the size of the car and the size of the people entering the car so in reality there is no clear answer due to the lack of information given.

WHY CANT THE ENGLISH MAN FIND HIS.....PANTS? BECAUSE HE NEEDED TO LOOK HARDER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! LOOK HARDER ENGLISHMAN!!!!!!!!LOOK HARDER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! yell this joke out loud and u will realize that its really funny!!! ^-^

Why does the girl get humped by a pig? Because she has sexual needs and no other more attractive animal, including an human wants to hump her.

Whats brown and sticky? A massive shit.

If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a semi.

apple pie.

How do you make a person cry? You bury them alive.

Person 1) Yo mama's so fat Person 2) My mother died in a horrible car accident last week

Do you still got what it needs to become a better leader than me Nero?

Contrary to popular belief- And this just in. My daughter has breast cancer.

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says: Why the long face? The horse says: "My wife's dead."

Why did the Koala Bear fall out of the tree? Because shortly before, it's life had ended due to lethal chlamydia, which is not uncommon for a Koala Bear these days. Due to it's loss of thought and therefore muscle control, it lost it's grip on the branch it was holding and naturally gravity took over.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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