Why did the clock say 10:30? It was a digital clock!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Let's get some comments on this one! Everyone add a comment with a quote from a movie! I'll thumbs-up the best comments!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the black man say to the Hispanic? Lovely weather we're having.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

A man sets his house on fire. His wife comes home, what did she ask? Why'd you set the house on fire?

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Guess what, I have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What happens if you don't stop, drop, and roll? Astigmatism.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A redhead walks into a hairdressing salon and asks to have her hair dyed black due to being a subject of bullying and social rudeness.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Atheism

thumb_up thumb_down -36

how do you know your sister is on her period? you dads dick taste like blood.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Jerry Sandusky and two other men are on a cruise ship, when it suddenly starts to sink. The first man says, "save the children!" The second man says, "screw the children!" Jerry Sandusky drowned.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What did a fireman say to his wife right after they got ran over by a stampede of bulls? nothing.... they were dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What is black and likely to fail? A chain smokers lungs.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

the WNBA

thumb_up thumb_down +4,259

Why can't you borrow money from a leprechaun? Because leprechauns don't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What is white and flies upwards? A retarded Snowflake.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why is Brodie Invited to Orlando? To make the beds

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did I say to my mum this morning? Good morning.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

i hate when mothers said " clean your room" me " why " mom " because we have guest coming " me " oh i am sorry i didn't know we are all gathering in my f**king room

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whats worse then the Holocaust? Chlamydia.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the mechanic sleep under a car? He had narcolepsy.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

agp

thumb_up thumb_down +111

Roses are red, Violets are blue. A family is tied-up and screaming for help in my basement.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the farmer say after the chicken started talking? Holy shit a talking chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops