What did the coal miner get for Christmas? Black Lung Disease

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Your Mother

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Why does Suzie like to wear sunglasses? Because she's blind.

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How do you make a baby float? 1 can root bear 2 scoop baby

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Knock knock. Who's there? Get in the van, or I'll kill you.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Well the chicken was very confused and had no logical brain power to think or know where it was going. Once he crossed the road he went into the ice cream parlor but was soon kicked out due to lack on communication

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Why do woman cook dinner? Because their husband has 6 jobs and is trying to support his family so she does a part and cooks dinner.

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How did the polack burn his hands on the stove? He placed his hands on the hot stove top burners not realizing they were hot.

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What did the black man say to the white man? Nothing. He punched him in the face and stole his iPhone.

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What is worse than spending time with in-laws? Nothing.

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why doesnt cornelia say anything? she didnt answer

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Cripples are lame.

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Wanna hear a joke? Womens' rights.

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Your mom is so fat she beat up snorlax from pokémon, than got charged for abbuse because it is illegal to use physical violence on pokémon unless in a battle or in attempt to capture one.

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1657 is a cool number, when a leprachaun sings it sounds like pie drinking an obese penguin (do you know what I mean....) :D

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whats the difference between a black guy and and an asian person... who cares kill them both

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what do you call a cat that looks like a lion 7

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whats black and white and black and white and black and white? a penguin rolling down a hill whats black and white and laughing? the penguin that pushed him

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Have you ever treat woman like sandwich? Elephant and walrus said Jews are troubles. If six plus nine is five, chickens will eat you, saturdays.

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Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they're ugly and they stink.

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How do you drown a blonde. Put a scratch 'n' sniff at the bottom of a pool.

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Why did the fungus leave the party? Truffle.

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Why do skinny women eat their food fresh cooked? So that they don't contract food-borne diseases and risk dying.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops