Doctor: “Knock Knock” Patient: “Who's there?” Doctor: “The interrupting Doctor” Patient: “The inter- Doctor: You have cancer.

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Why did they save the man in a burning building? To arrest him for arson.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To distract everyone from the Mexican.

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What did the squirrel say to the owl? Nothing, because owls and squirrels don't talk, but the owl ate the squirrel because it's a bird of prey.

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Why did the man stop smoking? Because he was shot in the face.

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Whats black and can multitask? My IPod you racist!

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What happens when you yell at people who have high blood pressure? They might get heart attacks & die.

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Q - What do you call a hamburger without pickles? A - You call it a hamburger just without the pickles.

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Why are you reading this? You should be taking a shower, you smell like crap.

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whats first than finding a worm in your apple? a blonde who asks you why there is a worm in your apple

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Titanic with will smith. Girl: I wont ever let go of you. Leo: Drowns. Smith: Move your fat ass over girl, there is like room for me and fifthy kids there yo! Me: Bitch if you need to float on a piece of wood where six of us could fit, im gonna drown you.

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Did you know there is a whole country occupied with twins? It's called China

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Where does lady gags buy her bran flakes ? Sainsburys

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Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a Fridge.

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Q: How many dwarfs does it take to change a light bulb? A: 1 or 2. One to change the light bulb and maybe another one to guards the staircase for the safety of the first one when the ceiling is too high (Wich happens almost every time because they are dwarfs.)

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What did the Jamacian say to his friends? Yo me Rastas' on de cloud shroud atta boy 9PM we rizzle into da hitasses bar and we order us da drink of "grandpa's cough medicince" me tinks, who grees wid my view od oftaday Rastas?

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Two muffins are baking in an oven. One turns to the other and says, "Boy, it sure is hot in here!" The other one replies, "OMG, A TALKING MUFFIN!"

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What did Anne Frank do this weekend? Nothing. she died in the holocaust.

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What did the pedophile get for christmas? He was raped by a gorilla

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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A blind man walks into a book store. He asks if they have any books in Braille. The employee says "Yes! Many you haven't even seen before!"

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why did the boy drop the ball. he was shot in the head.

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Whats funnier than a anti-joke? 911

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Fishing rods are cool This haiku does not make sense Lumpy Space Princess

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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