A black man walks into a bar. The bartender shoots him.

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How do you stop a black kid from hanging around in your back yard? Hang him in the front yard.

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John: Spell IT Mike: Q-U-A-D-R-A-M-E-C-H-A-N-I-C-S

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Roses are Red, Violets are not blue they are violet, nothing rhymes with this, I give up

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Two fish are in a tank. One asks the other, "How do you drive this thing?"

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in superbad, why couldnt seth take off mclovin's face and wear it as his own? no one can. theyre fictional characters in a movie

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Q:Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? A:He slipped and fell. Q2:Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A2:He was stapled to the first monkey. Q3:Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A3:Peer pressure.

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What do you call an armless, legless man hanging on a wall? Art.

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knock knock! who's there? a fat salesperson here to deliver your supplements

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A black man owns his own night club. He tells the white man to look out for his night club. The white man bangs his head. The black man says, I told you to look out, you have now bumped into my big club that I take out at night time.

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Two baby seals walk into a club.

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19th amendment

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A boy owned a dog that was uncommonly shaggy. Many people remarked upon its considerable shagginess. When the boy learned that there are contests for shaggy dogs, he entered his dog. The dog won first prize for shagginess in both the local and the regional competitions. The boy entered the dog in ever-larger contests, until finally he entered it in the world championship for shaggy dogs. But the day before the championship the dog died.

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Why do mermaids where seashells on their breasts? They don't wear anything because mermaids don't exist.

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What's the difference between celery and a truck?

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whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

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What's green and has wheels? A snow flake. I lied about the wheels, and the color.

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What does a gay horse eat? HEEEEEEYYYYYY!

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What has five balls and hates Mexicans? The lottery.

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One muffin says to the other muffin "it sure is hot in here." the other muffin replies "you know, technically, we're not muffins because we're not done cooking yet."

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If life throws you melons, not only might you be dyslexic, but you are probably also uneducated, since the phrase is "if life gives you lemons".

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whats red and falls from a tree an apple

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Why did so many white people vote for obama? They strongly believed in what he had to say, and believed he was the right person to lead our country during its troubled times.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Actually they are not, they are purple. Whoever the uneducated idiot was who made up that poem deserves nothing more then a slap in the face

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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