(Guys I want to get the most likes so like my joke.) What did the person want. To get the most likes :)

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did you hear about the dyslexic, overweight, wheelchair bound blind guy? No? Niether did I, I'm deaf so don't hear about anything.

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Yo momma so fat she decided to have lipo suction

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Last time I heard that I dropped my i-phone

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A baby seal walks in to a club... That's it. That's the joke.

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What did the customer say to the waitier? "I think I'll have the special."

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A list of comebacks: Hows ur face nancy grace ur mom ur face ur moms face take it to my butt, cuz ur the only one that gives a crap

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one being irish and the other chinese. now they both happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. so why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china, where as the chinese man had not committed any crime.

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What happened to Jim. He died his funeral is tomorrow.

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Ask me if I´m an orange. Are you an orange? No I? a person.

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A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear turns to the rabbit and says "I have colon cancer."

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whats the difference between a dog and a cat? ones a dog.

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Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

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Q: What do you brush your teeth with, sit on and sleep in? A: A toothbrush, a chair and a bed

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Why did the slut suck a dick? Because she's a slut.

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A woman is home washing her dishes when she suddenly slips banging her head on a cabinet. She passed out for a few seconds, then woke to find a great gash on her left cheek, fairly spurting blood. At the emergency room, the doctor asks, "How did this happen?" The woman replied, "My boy friend tried to drown me."

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Two trains, on the same track, left different stations, and travelled in opposite directions. 74 people died.

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What do you call a black man eating fried chicken? By his name, which could be John, considering the popularity of said name.

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Chuck Norris once stared in a show called Walker: Texas Ranger.

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a carrot walks into a bar, carrots cant walk for they do not have legs.

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*knock knock* Who's there? *Gorilla* Gorilla who? *Gorillas don't hoot, owls hoot*

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how do you burn a lot of calories? set a fat kid on fire

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How did Jimmy lose seven pounds? I killed him.

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Q: How did the black man own the Lamborgini? A: He was 2 Chainz.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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