What does a tomato and a human have in common? They both spray red liquid when stabbed repeatedly

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What has two thumbs and is very pale? A dead baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Q: What do you do when you find a black man bleeding from a bullet wound on your front porch? A: Call an ambulance! He may only have minutes to live before he bleeds to death! Hurry!

thumb_up thumb_down -36

I know you are but what am I? Gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Where did Sally go when the bomb went off? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

(Something terribly disturbing that people find funny)

thumb_up thumb_down -7

poop nuff said

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Why did the black man purchase a gun? Because the man enjoys to go hunting in his spare time.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How many Jews can you fit in an ash tray? 1 million.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

what do the students call their red-headed friend? Mike.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Roses are gray, violets are blue; I'm red-green colorblind so I occasionally have difficulty seeing most shades of red or green.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why are Chinese people short? Chinese people are often exposed to harmful chemicals because of lax environmental laws, and suffer from poor nutrition.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What is worse than the holocaust? DUH! A worm in MY apple!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did one muslim say to the other muslim? Nothing, muslims are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A guy walks into a bar, orders a drink, and nothing interesting happens.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How many light bulbs does it take to screw in a light bulb? One

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you do when your internet goes down? You right click on the internet connection and try to fix the problem.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Tennesse

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Whats the difference between the holocaust and Norm McDonald? One can be laughed at the other is Norm McDonald.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What's better than winning the Special Olympics? ...Not being retarted.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's the difference between a white man and a black man? The white man comes from European descent and the black man comes from an African descent. This leads to the difference in their skin color.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q. How do you know when an asian has robbed your house?? A. Like any other thief, most of your expensive belongings will be gone it depends on duration of robbing and their morality

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops