Knock knock? Who's there? Why don't you answer the damn door and find out for yourself?

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once you go black your credit goes wack

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I shot a bitch.

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A man suffering from terminal cancer walks into a bar and orders a soda because his doctor advised him not to drink. The bartender and others in the establishment are completely unaware of his disability.

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Roses are red, violets are blue ive got a gun so get in the van!

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your dad's gay. just let that sink in.

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how did they guy with no legs in the wheel chair walk? he couldnt because he had no legs.

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why did Michael Jackson cross the road? He didnt he is dead.

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Wenis Penis

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Q: What do a dollar bill and a kite have in common A: I dont know

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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How do you catch an elephant? Dig a nice deep hole in the ground, and fill it with ashes. Next, line the outside of the hole with peas. When the elephant comes to take a pea, kick it in the ash hole.

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why did the dog chase it's tail? it has a case of OCD where he was obsessed with catching his tail and would spin until he passed out or threw up.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Because, unfortunately, he is blind, prohibiting him from reading anything other than brail. He is, however, an excellent musician.

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Why is there milk on the stairs? Did the cow leak again?

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this is an anti joke so it has no punch line :D

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What do you call a poor man on the side of the rode asking for money? A poor man on the side of the rode asking for money.

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Why was the cat unable to drink its milk? He was stapled to the wall

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Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews undergo metabolism, maintain homeostasis, possess a capacity to grow, respond to stimuli, reproduce and, through natural selection, adapt to their environment in successive generations. More complex living organisms can communicate through various means.[1][5] A diverse array of living organisms (life forms) can be found in the biosphere on Earth, and the properties common to these organisms—plants, animals, fungi, protists, archaea, and bacteria—are a carbon- and water-based cellular form with complex organization and heritable genetic information. Pizza does not.

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How do you get a one-armed blonde out of a tree? Get a ladder and help her down.

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What's brown and sticky? A black man covered in syrup.

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What do you call a mix between a beaver and a mammal? You can't mix beavers and mammals, and even if I had said a platypus that would not have been funny.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not sally.

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What do you call someone trying to be funny? An anti-comedian.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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