What did Michael Jackson think when someone threw a tomato off his head? The same as he was thinking before it happened, because everything that goes through Michael Jackson's head is pornographic images.

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This is a haiku The second line is longest Hippopotamus.

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Penis

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....ZZzzzzz.....ZZzzzzz.....

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Why couldn't the little boy see? His eyes were closed.

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What do you get when you cross a lion and a tiger? A Ligor.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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your mama so fat she should go see a doctor.

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Knock, Knock! Go away!

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Why did the car stop To buy drugs

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A man walks into a bar. He realizes that he would need a designated driver if he would want to return home safely. So he then leaves.

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A Man, a chicken and a horse walk in to a bar and sit down at the stools near the jukebox. The jukebox is playing Love Me Tender. The Bartender notices the man pull something from his pocket and hand it to the chicken who takes it in her beak and then turns to the horse and passes it to him. "What'll it be?" says the Bartender. "methamphetamines", says the horse ironically.

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why did the nazi eat the jew? He didn't

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Once upon a time, there was a gorilla who found Suzie. Suzie was mauled because she had no arms

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Johnny walked up to his teacher one day and asked her to explain to him how babies were made. She instead whispered back to him, "Let me show you". He declined, because he wasn't prepared to be a father.

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Bob is asleep. Knock knock. Whos there? NOT BOB

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Knock Knock Who's There Lettuce Lettuce who? Lettuce down the street building his new garage

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A: Doctor doctor help me! B: Sorry, I'm not actually a doctor, stop calling me that!

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wanna hear a joke? woman's rights.

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two penguins are sitting in a bath tub. one penguin says, "hey, can you hand me the soap?" the other penguin says, "what do i look like, a typewriter?"

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Who is yellow and cant drive straight. A man dying of lukemia

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Why do people hate Jews? Because there is nothing to like about them

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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