How Long is a Chinese man.

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7

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woman's lacrosse

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Chuck Norris is so tough, he trained diligently for many years and is now a widely respected martial artist

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a piece of string walks into a bar and the bartender says “sorry we dont serve your kind here” so the string goes outside twists himself round and ruffles up one of his ends then walks back into the bar, the bartender says “aren’t you the piece of string i just kicked out?” the string then replies “i’m a frayed knot”

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Why did the chicken open door? It can't. Chickens don't have hands.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7 ? : Because 7 8 9

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Suicide.

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What did the arsonist shout out in the movie theater? Nothing. He set the exits ablaze and said absolutely nothing.

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Why did the man follow the law? He didn't want to get arrested

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Wanna here a joke? Canadians.

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What do you do when you see an epileptic having a fit in the bath? Laugh at him

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Why can't Larry drive? Because he doesn't have his license, and his temps expired!

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What happened to to dyslexic giraffe that tripped over a brick. It got back up.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was hit by a large refrigerator Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? The two of them were stapled together Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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Why did the girl drop her sucker? she was hit by a truck!

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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Why wasn't the unplugged computer on?

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Why was the hasidic so stupid? He wasn't. He died in the holocaust.

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Know what people hated the most? 9-11

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A man was going to take his girlfriend to prom, and decided to pick up his suit from the dry cleaners. Unfortunately, there was a long line. He then went to pick up some flowers for his date, but there was a long flower line. Finally, he takes his date to prom and decides to get some punch for them.He returns with the refreshing beverage and the couple has a wonderful time.

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how do you make a dead baby float? take your foot off its head.

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Why the worker did not come to work? Because he died!

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what do you call a baby that's just been crushed by a piano. a mess for a cleaner to deal with. think about his health. after that he might get a disease from the body and he might not get to sleep as it is a haunting sight.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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