prison isnt fun it also is bland kidnapping is a crime but get in the van

roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

Siri, what is your definition of love? "Let me check on that...Here's what I've found." Google.com search = definition of love

And so the poster says to the apple ........ Your not my dog

"Do you like pie?" "No." "Do you like blueberries?" "No." "I have something you won't like." "Is it a blueberry pie?" "No, I shagged your wife last night".

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have multiple personality disorder, NO YOU DON'T!

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks him, "Why the long face?" The horse did not reply, because horses cannot talk.

How are bananas and friends alike? If you peel their skin and eat them

What do you call a Jewish wanna be gangster? Drake

Sometimes I hope into bed and pretend I'm a carrot!!!!

Why didn't Hellen Keller just wear glasses? Oh wait

A Muslim terrorist walks onto a bus, with the mindset to blow him and the other 27 people up*. Before he steps onto the bus, he realizes the error in his ways and decides to not follow through. He goes to the airport instead.

Friends are like trees, they fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

Q: Why did the white mother with a newborn baby lock her car doors? A: Because a black guy walked by.

A guy forgot his 20th wedding anniversary. His wife was really mad, and said that she better have something in the driveway that goes from 0 to 350 in 10 seconds, and he quickly pulled out an AK-47 and murdered her violently.

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

What's Funnier than this joke? Lee Evans

What's so sad about a bus with mentally handicapped children driving off a cliff? There was one empty seat.

Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

rebecca is a hard worker

Q: Whats a spanish teacher who cant speak spanish A: duhh. it called an english teacher

what do u say when u steal something? STOLEN!!!!!!!!!

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

guess what my nephew said today? oh ya i forgot, hes dead..

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...