A man walks into a movie theater.and attempts to parate a film. He is then caught by employees of the theater and now faces fines and possible jail time for his actions.

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What did the teapot say to the teacup? Nothing. Teapots and teacups are inanimate objects, therefore, cannot speak.

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What did the boy in the wheelchair get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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What do you call a man that is half Chinese and half Irish? Whatever you want, he's deaf so he won't be able to hear you anyway.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Not Harry Styles! - Louis

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why did the girl say what's up. she wanted to know what they were doing

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why did the chicken cross the road because on the other side his wife that he had loved for years was being tortured and he was trying to save her life.

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A tall German man and a short Ukrainian woman walk into a pub and sit down for a drink. The German, not wanting to seem rude, asks the Ukrainian how her day has been. The Ukrainian smiles confusedly as she doesn't understand German.

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Three logicians were travelling up to Scotland in a train. They saw a black cow standing parallel to the train tracks; the first sign of life since crossing the border. The first logician says "Oh, so they do have black cows in Scotland." The second logician says "No, they have at least one black cow in Scotland." The third logician says "No, they have at least one cow in Scotland, one side of which, at least, is black."

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Q: What does Chinese look like? A:Chinese

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Knock Knock Who's there? Its the pizza man. Get your yellow no good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead. 1,2...10

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An slutty attractive secretary went into her boss' office He killed her.

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why did Louisa go black and never go back? She got hit by a truck

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Why did the tortoise cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Dylan Hodge fingered himself. Hah.

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What do you call a blind fish? Amblyopsidae.

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Why do cow say moo? Because you touch yourself at night

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Why was the Muslim crying? Because his brother got hit by a bus.

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Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducked.

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whats da difference between a black people and grass. there both black except for the grass.

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a man walks into a bar, it hurt.

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man walks into a bar and the bartender says, "you sir are gay!" The gay man says, "I take offense to that!" The bartender then replies "how may I help you."

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How do you teach a kid to ski you strap it to the back of a polar bear

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Roses are red violets are blue poems don't have to rhyme..... Refrigerator

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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