Why was the dog sweating? It was locked in a car on a hot day.

What you do you call a gay man with no arms and legs? His name.

What did the muslim get for christmas? Nothing.

Jacob loves stroking his gf's doodle every lunch break. He was embarrased cause it was bigger than his.

Knock knock Who's there? Fuk Fuk who?

You have now entered Automatic Breathing Mode

Q. Where did Little Timmy go for Christmas? A. Auschwitz

What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

a blind guy walks past a fish market and exlaims.. "it smells like a fish market"

Why did Sally fall off the swing? - Because she had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up again? - Because she had no legs. Why didn't anyone help her? - Because she had no friends. Knock knock. -Who's there? Not Sally.

CHORGLUND

What did the parrot say to the dumb man? Nothing

A guy punched himself. He then said ouch.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Although this is a highly improbable scenario, one would assume that, being a chicken, it did not have much of an intuitive idea as to what to do while it was stray for whatever reason in an urbanized area. Considering chickens do not harbor nearly as much of a mental capacity as it would require to even comprehend the concept of a "road" and is impervious to the idea of oncoming traffic and such, the fact that it happened to be crossing the road was in fact not even recognized by the chicken. For this reasons I deem this question unanswerable.

Q: Did you hear about the fire at the circus? A: It was in tents!

What's your middle name? (Interrupt them) It doesn't matter what your middle name is! What does deduce mean? Fall down the stairs.

where did napolean keep his armies? In his sleevies!

Why does LeBron James keep his phone on vibrate? Because he is often in the company of others and he does not want a ringtone to distract others from the current topic of discussion.

why is blake oneal gay? because hes black and he likes peniss in his ass

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a depressed alcoholic drug addict whose children had all been diagnosed with a rare form of terminal brain cancer, and he decided to end it then and there by jumping in front of an approaching bus.

Whats Mary short for? Shes got no legs

School is like a boner. It is long and hard unless your asian.

Lady: I think you guys would be very happy here. Chandler: No no no no no no! No, we're not together. We're not a couple, definitely not a couple! Joey: You seem pretty insulted by that. What? I'm not good enough for you? Chandler: We're not going to have this conversation AGAIN!

What did the virulent Homophobe do during the PRIDE national day of silence? He talked

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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