What do you get when you cross Bambi and a ghost? Bamboo

Two penguins are sitting in a bathtub. One looks at the other and says, "Can you pass the soap?" The other penguin says, "What do i look like, a typewriter?"

Knock knock Whos there? Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior jesus christ?

Not even I believe you will ever know yourself that well ever Nero, you see what you created as a false illusion, as all of your, or rather our effort for nothing, as a pathetic attempt to create heaven on earth. In my eyes, you succeeded in doing so, and if it where for you, or more people such as yourself and I, it would have lasted, stop trying to give people what they do not deserve, and remember that making others happy will never cure the sadness and pain deep within you, only cover it. Stop fleeing from yourself, stay, get to know yourself.

Hickory dickory dock. Two mice ran up the clock. The clock struck one; The other escaped with minor injuries.

I road a horse to school. My friend stabbed it with a Javelin and screamed.... The horse was his Dad

Have you heard of the Armenian genocide? No? Me neither.

whats long and green? weed

what do you call a person who rides a bike a lot? BATMAN!!! -s.s

What do you call you're mum? Depends who's reading it or just mum

I was once a hamster.

Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducked.

100% of the people who go to school die. What about the people who don't go to school? They die too.

EGGPLANT

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Cause KFC was chasing him.

Q: What's worse then stubbing your toe? A: Coming home from school and your house is burnt down and your whole family is dead.

How did the fat woman survive the car accident? She had on her seat belt.

ding dong thats right no knock on door anymore

Why doesnt the ladder work? A ladder is an inaminent object therefore imcapable of having a job.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have ADD Hey look, a squirrel!!

Q: What is the difference between a tree and a women? A: your mom

Did you know that in the country of Nigeria, every minute, 60 second passes?

How does Moses make his Tea? Hebrews it.

What is the difference between a pizza and a Black guy? A pizza can serve a family of four.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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