Why did the kid eat so much ice cream? Because he wanted to eat ice cream.

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Knock knock Who's there? Mike Mike who? Mike Davis from across the street. Come in.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road ? A. Because he had grown tired of living thus choosing to end his life.

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What did the daddy hamster say to the baby hamster? Nothing. Male hamsters eat their young.

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Verbal assault; because battering someone to death with a dictionary has never been so much fun. [L]

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Whats brown and sticky? A stick

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Why did the cow eat the grass? Only thing he had to eat.

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A man goes to the doctor's office. The doctor says, "I have some bad news, and some worse news. The bad news is you have alzheimer's. The worse news is you have cancer." The man breaks down in tears, realizing that his life as he knew it is over, and recognizing the horrible burden he is about to become on his family, both financially and emotionally.

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Knock Knock (No response) Knock knock (No response)

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Why did the soccer player miss practice? He got shot in the face.

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What is funnier than one dead baby? Two dead Babies

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What do you call a gay Jew? I don't know, but Jews are cool.

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What did Superman get for Christmas. Nothing as he likes to stay detached from society.

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What do you call a boy that was once a boy, but no longer is a boy? A Man

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Oceanic flight 815 crashes on an island and the survivors are stranded. They all die of starvation and dehydration within a week.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothin. You already told her twice.

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If life throws you fried chicken your probably black

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A man walks in to a bar, so he got hurt.

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how much blondes does it take to fix a light bulb 1 to buy the bulb 2 to put it up and 25 to think about what it does

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knock knock whose there banana banana who well, since a banana is a fruit and not human, it does not have parents and thus no last name was given to it.

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Roses? are red Violets are blue, Kangaroos like Oranges, Poems suck, Refrigerator.

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How Do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the door put the elephant in and close the door. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the door take the elephant out put the giraffe in and close the door. The lion king has a meeting with all the animals but one doesn't turn up, which one is it? The giraffe because it's still in the fridge.

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What did the one bagpiper say to the other? Nothing, one cannot speak while playing the bagpipes.

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A plane crashes in the wilderness on the border of Canada and the U.S. Where do they bury the survivors? I lied. There were none.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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