What has two thumbs and is very pale? A dead baby.

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Q-"what did the carrot say to the plant" A-"nothing because neither one of these objects can talk"

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What do a priest, a rabbi, and an asian have in common? They all don't know each other.

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Why was the boy sad? His cookies are gone.

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what do you call a black man at a school. coach.

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What do you call a man with one ear? A one-eared man.

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What do you call a man with three testicles? Polyorchid. Look it up.

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A man walks into a bar at 1 in the afternoon. He's the bartender and a fellow employee asked him to cover the afternoon shift.

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Why didn't gram-pa give his grandson a Birthday present? Because he had Alzheimer's and forgot about him.

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Two black people jump off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? Who cares.

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He was. I am sorry, he knows to much, this is for the well being of everyone, including yourself, he will be going down, the order has been given.

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Why did the black man sleep all day? He suffered from narcolepsy.

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Why was Sally in a wheelchair? Her abusive father beat her repeatedly with a rake.. Then as she crawled out the door to try and get help, the abusive father took his Dodge Ram and ran over her legs reapeatedly. Then began to slap her. Luckily, a vigilante saw the whole thing and slaughtered the father with an axe and carefully escorted Sally to the hospital. After a couple of weeks of beautiful and extraordinary care, Sally made a full recovery and was able to leave.. and all patients have to leave in a wheelchair

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Yo mamma so stupid... She's considering going to college to get a better education

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How do you fit 10,000,000 jews inside a car? It's not physically possible as no car can carry that many people.

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Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary.

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What did the orphan boy get for his birthday? The extermination of his race.

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life is like a box of chocolates, it sucks if you have diabetes

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4 out of 4 questions. You want to cross the lake, but alligators live in that river. How do you get across? The alligators aren't there. They're all at the lion king's meeting.

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What do you do when your phone goes off in class? Stay behind after class whilst the teacher takes off his pants and tells you do bend over a desk. This is your punishment.

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What did Jesus say to the jews? Fuck you.

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1.Why were the black men asked to leave the bar? Because it was a womens bar. 2.Why did the 40 year old get an erection? Because he was excited.

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Why are rich guys gay? Because they can afford to be

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Stop making 9/11 jokes their just plane unfunny

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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