In what way are a pile of deceased children and a Ferrari F430 similar? Neither can be found in my garage, nor anywhere under my possession. As for the Ferrari, this is an unfortunate truth. Due to Ferraris' high level of desirability, and to their low supply, the cost of one such car is much more than an average person can afford. As for the pile of deceased children, anyone in possesion (for lack of a better term, as one can not truly possess another human being, even post mortem) of such a grotesque thing is probably too sick and twisted to be submitting jokes with no apparent climax in hopes of stimulating the minds of the joke's readers sense of humor.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

My friend was in court for stealling smoothies so i told him to plead innocent and received 10 years in a federal prison and a fine of up too £5000 pounds

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a diving-board factory worker threatening to jump off the roof? Names.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the clown get in the car? Because he can.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q. Why did the friend say to the other friend "Your soo gay!" A. Because he was gay..

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What do you call an Englishman, an Irishman and a Chineseman playing football? 3 friends playing their favourite sport.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

how do you wake up lady gaga poke her face

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why do you walk to your bed at night? Beds cant walk.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man wearing dark sunglasses walks into a convenience store with a dog on a leash. He goes to the middle of the store, and he starts swinging the dog around over his head by the leash. The store clerk comes over and asks, "what are you doing?" The man replies, "Ajiohskdcojqpowuskncvlkzb" Not knowing what else to do, the clerk calls 911. It turns out the man's name is Ruprict, and he has escaped from the local mental institution. A police officer shortly arrives to bring Ruprict back to the hospital.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What was sandusky's role at penn state turned tight ends into wide receivers

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Chuck Norris can beat an eleven-year-old in a fight.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did Lucy fall off the swing? Someone chucked a fridge at her.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Whats the difference between a monkey and a baby? Eating a baby tastes better with saltines.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Sorry babe, even if I was I would not tell you, the entire place is surrounded, but within enough of a distance, so we will plant a nice setup around the green shack so everyone assumes his deal was some solo operation, if someone else is heading at his direction now, you are gonna get busted, so you better stay down.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Whose. There? Not Susie.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

''Hey, this is absolutely true. There's an organization now called 'Draft Dick Cheney for President, 2012.' Yeah. Good luck with that. They tried to draft Dick Cheney five times during Vietnam. That didn't work.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Do you want to hear a good anti-joke? Well I don't have one.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

butt sex

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q. How many lemons does one person take to fill a ladder? A. Fish

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Where do you send a Jew with ADD? A concentration camp.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What's big, red, has green and puple spots and responds to "here boy"? Nothing, not to my knowledge anyway!

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What did Death say to Life? "Look, I respect that you waited till after I broke up with Sandy to ask her out, but it's still a little akward for me, so although there are no hard feelings, it's probably better if we keep our distance from each other for awhile."

thumb_up thumb_down +5

how do you get a man with a gun out of your house? you don't.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops