what do you call a Ukranian woman without a visa? my maid

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Once upon a time there was a magical duck in a magical kingdom. Nothing interesting ever happened to it and it was eaten by a magical fox.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Irune. Irune who? Irune my life with all this red sand.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick.

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What's worse than 1 bee sting ? 2 bee stings What's worse than 2 bee stings ? the holocaust what's worse than the holocaust ? 3 bee stings

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Why did the black man buy a gun? because he wanted to go hunting.

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A englishmen an irishmen and a ginger walk off a bridge gingers have no souls

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homosexual

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Whats worse than receiving a dollar? Receiving a penny.

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Two guys walk into a bar.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a trunk? 37.

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An insane individual walks into a bank and asks for $500. The teller refuses since he doesn't have an account, so the individual pulls out a gun and asks the teller again. The teller presses the silent panic button, causing the cops to show up and arrest the gunman, but not before he manages to shoot the teller and the small child standing next two counters over.

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What's worse than Bogans? Boat people.

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What's the square root of 69? 8.3

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your mom

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People are like cats, they both die when they're suffocated

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Why is the dog in the driver seat? Why is there birds making you filet mignon? Why is your toe blue? I don't know the answer. Go talk to your doctor

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An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can't talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it's a bird of prey. Posted by: BerserkSpoon

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If you give a mouse a cookie, he will probably eat it then have a heart attack due to the high level of sugar in the cookie

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Knock knock. Who's there? Schizophrenia.

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why did the girl die. because she was bullied and abused everyday by her family and friends. she was homeless and was forced to drop a bomb on her own forest. there fore she stabbed herself.

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What is big, eats cats, smells good, but looks like shit? A big, cat eating, good smelling piece of shit

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What's better than winning a million dollars? Winning 2 million dollars!

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What happened when the white man saw a black man running with a purse? He called the police. The police proceeded to chase the black man down tackling him into a dumpster, causing permanent spinal damage. Upon investigation into the situation, the black man was deaf and he was bringing the purse, which contained an epi-pen, to his dying wife a block away. The white man who called the police and the police officers involved were sued by the family for a large sum of money.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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