Why do Jewish people where hats in church? They feel there head will often get cold

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was heading to the funeral house to mourn his dead family.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's funnier than cancer? Just about anything. There's nothing funny about terminal illnesses.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's just not right? Left

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Where do cows go to have fun? Cows don't have a concept of fun as such, but they would probably go to a large, sunny field full of lush, green grass with a bubbling river and plenty of shade.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q. What's brown and sticky? A. A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

whats green and has wheels? grass i lied about the wheels

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q. What do you get when you put a Jew and Adolf Hitler in the same room? A. Trouble

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there happened to be road in the vicinity of the fowl and the odds of the bird crossing it is very high.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man walks into a bar. He enjoys a few quiet drinks with friends before returning home to his loving family.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How did 6-year old dyslexic boy start his essay on soap? Sopa is shit...

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken had just received a call from his family, hearing that his father had just been butchered. He was approaching the farm when an 18-wheeler approached. The tire flew off, hit a candy store, candy flew in the chicken's mouth, and it died of diabetes. However, right before the chicken died he finally crossed the road, not knowing he would get shot by his farmer. The chicken managed to survive the shooting to his right kidney, wiggled to his family, and died in front of his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did Osama bin Laden say to Jesus? Nothing. He's in hell.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

It may be Stupid but its also Dumb. ~Patrick Star

thumb_up thumb_down -14

MATH: if for every 1 minute for billy is 5 minutes and every 5 minutes is an hour than billy is on acid and needs to come down.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the apple say to the pear? Fred, you are going insane and i'm getting a divorce.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the girl with a striped ball fall over? She was a victim of a drive-by shooting.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Unless your father is a doctor and you live with him.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Your mother is so nice, I saw her while grocery shopping and we pleasantly chatted. She also remembered my name and invited me to come over sometime and have a snack.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why is it wrong to love your neighbour? You would be loving a dickhead.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What is three times more dangerous than war? Three wars.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Where do farmers retire their used farm equipment? The tree in their backyard.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What did one cat say to the other cat? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops