Why couldn't the cow move? It had Cystic Fibrosis.

What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

why barack obama sad he realized the 4 trillion dollars of debt wasn't going be solved by borrowing more money

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

Knock Knock. Who's there? You Know. You Know who?.......GOODBYE!

Osama Bin Laden and a monk walk into a bar. Mistaken Identity. It was the Dalai Lama, Osama is dead.

What do u call a gay dinosaur? Dinosaurs don't exist

What worse that punching a baby? Stabing one.

I swear to god it wasn't me! Dont swear to god its a sin !

What is Freddie Mercury's favorite planet? Earth.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He felt like crossing roads that day.

Don't quote me on this Nero, but she kinda deserves it, she should know better, its not like you have gotten this far by not knowing your limits, even if you tend to break them way too often. Can you get rid of the hallucinations with your mind alone? If not get to sleep asap! And stay asleep for a month or so, and if they somehow cant feed your system intravenously, they can all get the fuck out of there.

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Whats the difference between a jew and firewood? Firewood is meant to be burned in a stove or firepit while jews are functioning members of society.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

Why is Osama Bin Laden scared of the dark? To be honest, I don't know, and I doubt you do either. Osama Bin Laden has been a fugitive on America's Top Ten Most Wanted list for over 10 years; there is no way that you could possibly know such personal information about him if the United States government can't even locate him and prosecute him for the heinous crimes he committed against the U.S. Don't ever lie to me again.

So a black man walked into a bar and ordered a drink. He payed for the drink and couldn't have been more courteous

Q:What do you call Black Jesus ? A:Black Jesus a.w. j.p.

What is worst about the great white shark? It's hundreds of sharp teeth, strong tail, or subtle racism? Probably the teeth.

whats black and white? Micheal Jackson. - Avery Vartanian

Why did the boy loose his hat Because he got hit by a plane

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw 'em.

Whats's the similarities between an apple and a cat? They both have legs except for the apple.

Why couldn't the girl charge her phone? The charger wasn't plugged in.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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