Why did Suzy fall off the swing? As Suzy neared the ground while swinging, her foot caught a small hole in the swingset's pebble foundation, and the power of Suzy's momentum along with the sudden stop of Suzy's swing forced Suzy to fly forward off of the swing. Suzy, seeing the silliness of her mistake, laughed it off, and tried to get back up. She quickly realized that her leg had snapped in half. Suzy will never walk again.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

You momma's so ugly your dad left her.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what do you do if you see a black man covered in hot greece on the floor of the bus shelter? call an ambulance...

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How do you make a baby understand what you want? You color yourself purple, wear a yellow shirt, and do cart wheels while singing "The wheels on the bus go 'round and 'round!"

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Have you heard the joke that they don't tell retarded people? You haven't? Well then alright let me tell you because it's actually quite amusing.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What is the difference between a deer and a child in africa? Why does it matter? They're both being hunted.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? i know how to make a pizza

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the middle-aged lady have a heart attack? Years of heavy smoking, alcohol abuse and lack of exercise had taken its toll on her body, causing it to age prematurely. @JWest

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Cripples are lame.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

The chickens have become self-aware!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a bear in the rain? A wet bear.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What does a black man love more than anything? His family you racist c u n t.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

One day... Jack: Good morning Ben: Good morning The End.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's the difference between a duck? I'm sorry, I was typing too quickly and missed off the end of my sentence. I meant to say "What's the difference between a duck and a goose?" and the answer is that they are entirely different species of waterfowl.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house? A: That depends how hard you throw them... Q: Whats worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? A: 1 baby nailed to 10 trees...

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Person A - I farted Person B - YUCK

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Little kid asks his mom: "Why do zombies eat people?" His mom says: "Becasue honey, your MEAT"

thumb_up thumb_down -30

There's three sisters: a blonde, a brunette and a redhead. They know she's not they're real mom.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

1:Your reading my text. 2:Your wondering what the point is. 3:Your getting angry. 5:Your going to click thumbs down. 6:But wait! You didn't realize that there was no number 4. 7:Your checking it. 9:Your smiling. 10:Your smiling so much you forgot to check for number 8. 11:Your checking it. 12:Jokes on you.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Is the capitol of Michigan pronounced DEE-troit or de-TROIT? It's pronounced Lansing.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's brown and sticky? Caramel.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did Jimmy fall off of his bike? Well, he was always known for his lack of balance.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why was the girl crying? She had just been severely raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops