Mike and Richard were walking down the street together Richard left because of Mike's garlic breath

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What is the difference between tea pot and shinkansen? shinkansen is very quick train and tea pot is traditional piece of dishes..

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Fire is red Water is blue Earth is brown Air is transparent

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How do you get a Mexicans attention? By calling him by his name.

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what did the duck say to the other duck Quack

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What's in a bag of dead babies? Dead babies and one alive baby eating it's way out.

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What do you call a man with no heart? Dead.

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Q. How many blonds do you know? A. I don't know any blonds, but are you perhaps talking about blondes? Because if so, I still don't know any.

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What's brown and has four wheels? Wood, I lied about the wheels.

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Why is it incorrect that the universe will end in 2012? Because profound idiocy doesn't always occur.

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What happened to the young baby after her mother died It grew up got a collage degree and had a great life growing up with her dad and visiting the cemetery every year

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What is red, blue, and green all over? A piece of paper with three colors on it.

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Replacement Referees

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Two fish in a tank one said "How do you drive this thing?"

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Why couldn'nt Sally swing on the swing? Because Sally was a carrot

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-Knock, knock. -Is it the pizza man? -No. -Then go away.

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What happend to the murderer who ate people? He was sent to jail for a number of years and now is having work done to stop him from eating people

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Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are potentially dangerous and could cause much harm if handled without prior knowledge of how to use them.

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what's blue and looks like a shirt? a blue shirt

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If you're paddling upstream in a canoe and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes fit in a doghouse? None! Ice cream doesn't have bones!

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What did the general say before the soldiers got in the tank? Get in the tank

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like saying the colors of flowers... how about you.

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What do you call a black man repairing a car? A mechanic who has worked very hard to gain his qualifiaction.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police, your family is dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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