What did the salami say to the ham? Nothing; meat can not talk

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Q: a blonde, a brunette, and redhead jump off a cliff, which one hits the ground first? A: Most likely the one that weighs more

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William and Kate do get off their ass and do something useful for once instead of hogging the cover of intouch magazine.

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why do you often see black man dating fat chick?? because they have the brains to realise that fat chicks are just people and need love too

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An incoming freshman introduces himself to his Ethics professor by saying, "What's up?" To which the professor responds, "You should never end a sentence with a preposition." The freshman, who is both clever and witty, quickly responds to his future Professor, saying: "Professor, I practice linguistic description, such that I observe language objectively in a way that does not adhere strictly to grammatical and syntactic dogma". The professor, surprised by the student's philosophical disposition, engages the student in a highly constructive dialogue about the philosophy of language, from which both the student and teacher learn more about each other and themselves.

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q. a whale walks into a bar. The bartender asks"why are you wailling?" A. I my 3 year-old son died.

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Connor is homo

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What happened when a gay man asked a straight man what time it was? He told him the correct time, they parted ways and went about with their lives.

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One guy asks another guy, "Why did the sleeping man get sucked into the sinkhole?" The other guy replies, "I don't know, I heard about that a few months ago, it seems highly improbable statistically. "

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A wanted man walks into a bar. The police come and take him to jail.

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Yesterday, upon the stair, I met a man who wasn't there. I saw him there again today; I've been sectioned. [L]

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What are the things that define you? The things that define you.

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What do Kenyans do at night? Starve.

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What did the cancer patient get for Christmas? Nothing, she didn't make it that far.

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What's the difference between donuts and dead babies? You can't buy a bakers dozen of dead babies at Tim Hortons.

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Ask me what my favorite color is. What's you favorite color? Blue.

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Have you ever just woken up one day and thought, "I don't wanna wear pants today."

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What's worse than your dad dying in a car crash? Your mom being in the same car.

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a guy walkied into a bar... he really got hurt

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Why couldn't the Canadian taste the maple syrup? Because someone cut off his tongue. -BLLJ

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I do like haikus even when they are random refrigerator

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A: Knock Knock. B:Who's there? A: The IRS and Child Protective Services

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A woman asked me today if I'd ever tried crazy golf. I hadn't actually ever tried it.... So I replied "no".

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Did you know Helen Keller had a swingset? Neither did she.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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