A man runs into a bar and yells "Ow!!" He is hospitalized due to severe trauma to the head and spine.

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme but this one doesn't

Whos worse than Akise Teague. Mike Vick

If you looked up stupid in Webster's dictionary, you wouldn't see a picture of yourself, because Webster's dictionary doesn't have pictures.

What do Jews always complain & want money for? Anything

what did the 35 year old man say when he walked in his home last night? Nothing, he started crying because he saw that someone had viciously killed his guinea pig.

A woman was in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband. Shortly after she brings the sandwich to him and he thanks her seeing as his disabled legs prevent him from walking to the kitchen and making one himself. His wife later heads to her job as a firefighter.

Why did a blind man buy a violin. To learn how to play a violin.

How can you tell that your friend just had sex with a blonde? The girl he just had sex with has blonde hair.

Whatever you do in life, give 100%… unless you’re giving blood.

the website says jokes, yet these are all facts.

Why does your mother not love you anymore? Because she was in a tragic car accident 5 years ago and is now deceased and is therefore incapable of love.

What happened to the latino and asian man in math class when they had a test? They both recieved exceptional scores as they both helped each other study the night before.

the world flooded and everybody died how did they die? the all fell into lava!

Why does Susie fall off the swing? I shot her in the head with a pistol.

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Why did the little boy run away from the beach? Hurricane Irene.

What sits in the corner of a room and gets smaller and smaller? A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler.

knock knock whos there jew jew who JEW YOU

Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? No, he hasn't either

Yo momma is so poor when she went to the bank the teller was like " you have no money."

Doctor, my husband tells me he doesn't like my figure .... That's irrelevant now, you've contracted a rare blood disease and will be dead within a month.

Why couldn't little Johnny play sports like the rest of the kids? He was diagnosed with polio at the age of 3 and has limited use of his legs.

Say you are caught in a net with 10 other people in said net at a construction site. A pair of scissors are right next to you and everyone said to use the scissors. But instead of using the scissors, you use your teeth in risk of a broken tooth.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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