Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Teacher: What's 2x2 John? John: (ignores teacher) Teacher: John! John: huh? Teacher: go on John: uh? 24?

thumb_up thumb_down

What is worse than the holocaust? A worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's Great and Danish? The Great Dane Kane.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What Did The Ocean Say To The Other Ocean? What? Nothing, They Just Waved. Oh. Did You Sea What I Did There? No. I'm Shore You Did.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Whats brown and smells like poo?? Poo

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you call a gay African American Jewish German flight attendant who is addicted to many hard drugs? His name.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate you so suck on poo.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

why did the girl eat a banana? because she was hungry

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Ok, So what happens when an Irishman, Rabbi, and a Black guy all walk into a bar. Nothing the Black guys a recovering alcoholic and is supported by his loving family and friends, especially by his son Martin who he promised to stop drinking when he was 7.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A man saw a dinosaur. He probably watched it on the television because dinosaurs have been extingt for a very long time.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

fart

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Rob Bell

thumb_up thumb_down +95

What did the mexican say to the other mexican? Hola.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

what is the difference of left and right? i used my right hand to stab your mother.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

Wha'ts Slippery when wet? A Wet Slipper.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 raped and murdered 8.

thumb_up thumb_down +62

Q: What did zero say to the eight? A: Nice belt

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a dragon that doesn't breathe fire? A Griffin.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

If bananas are purple, then what color are oranges? I am not going to tell you the answer because this joke has no significance whatsoever.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

I AM DISSAPOINTED

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A black man and a mexican are in a car, who's driving? Nobody, the car is parked while they look at a map for directions because doing that while you are driving would be very dangerous and could result in a collision.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops