Why did the cat cross the road? he wanted to be a docter.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? I t was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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My wife crashed the car while listening to Adele last night. She ended up rolling in the jeep.

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do you like walffles?Yes I like walffles!

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How many dead babies can you fit in my truck? Thirty-seven and a half;)

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1st guy: Wanna hear a joke? 2nd guy: Yeah sure. 1st guy: Me too.

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Someone asked me yesterday why my friend Portier is named after a sports car... I mean, fair enough, it is a common misconception but they live in the country and her Dad drives a tractor; think it through. [L]

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What do you call a clock that neither ticks nor tocks? A broken clock

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There are four worms walking in a straight line. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The fourth worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied!

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A man in a wheelchair walks into a bar... ...wait a second.

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this is stupid .... yep

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why cant black people swim? I dont know but they killed my family

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Why wasn't the black woman allowed on the bus? It was rush hour and the bus was full.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen cheese

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Whats Yellow and has arms. A lemon i lied about the arms.

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimer whats a rose?

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Why did the kid eat so much ice cream? Because he wanted to eat ice cream.

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Knock knock Who's there? Mike Mike who? Mike Davis from across the street. Come in.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road ? A. Because he had grown tired of living thus choosing to end his life.

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What did the daddy hamster say to the baby hamster? Nothing. Male hamsters eat their young.

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Verbal assault; because battering someone to death with a dictionary has never been so much fun. [L]

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Whats brown and sticky? A stick

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Why did the cow eat the grass? Only thing he had to eat.

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A man goes to the doctor's office. The doctor says, "I have some bad news, and some worse news. The bad news is you have alzheimer's. The worse news is you have cancer." The man breaks down in tears, realizing that his life as he knew it is over, and recognizing the horrible burden he is about to become on his family, both financially and emotionally.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops