what would you watch during a scary movie? anything you want.

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How do you kill someone? Shoot them. How do you kill someone with a knife? Shoot them How do you kill someone in a car? Shoot them How do you kill someone in a jet? Put the gun in the propeller

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What do you tell your chicken when it is it's birthday. Nothing, because he wouldn't understand you.

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An itsy bitsy spider went up the water spout Down came my dick, and forced the spider out

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How many dueche bags does it take to change a light bulb? 0 They're two complete unrelated things

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Roses are black. Violets are black. Everything is black. I'm blind.

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Yo mamas so fat, when she jumps in a pool she displaces a disproportionate volume of water.

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What did the young boy get his Father for Father's Day? A bouquet of flowers for his grave stone.

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A black man and a Mexican fall off a cliff, who dies first? They both die from hitting sharp rocks at the bottom crushing their skulls, so it doesn't matter its just really sad.

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What's black and gets in trouble a lot? A dog with black fur that has not been well trained.

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What's worse than killing 6,000,000 Jews? Killing 6,000,001.

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Why isn;t the square root of peanut butter very athletic?.Actually, peanut butter isn't a mathematical equation nor does it have the necessary chemical make-up, physical properties or the biological construct that is required for it to be able to be considered athletic, stupid. You now have a inoperable tumor at the base of your spine. And I fucked your dad and shat in his mouth. Also, the cure for leukemia is my diarrhoea, you faggot.

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What did the hobo get for christmas? Nothing.

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How did Suzy die She choked on a Pick-Up Truck

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A: Knock Knock B: ...

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What's the opposite of Them Cox? Deez Nuts

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whats worse tan loosing checkers getting lit on fire

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What do you call a black man driving a expensive sports car? A respectable member of society

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The man walked into the church and stayed there.

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A guy decides to bring his new blonde girlfriend to a football game. After the game is over, he asks her if she liked the game. She replies: "Oh it was great, I loved watching those men in tight clothes, but there is one thing I don't understand." "What did you not understand?" And the blonde says: "Well, at the begginning of the game, both teams flipped a quarter to see who would kick off first. Then the rest of the game everybody was yelling get the quarter back, get the quarter back, get the quarter back. So I thought to myself, gosh it's just a quarter!"

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why didn't love legs cross the road because he had no balls

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What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

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Your mom is so ugly that she often finds it difficult attracting members of the opposite sex.

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What does 10 dead babies in a microwave look like? I dont know. I was too busy masturbating.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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