Your mother's breasts sag so low that the late great impressionist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

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What do you call a tennis match between Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder? An anachronistic hypothetical sporting event that would never happen.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Who cares its a chicken, it probably got hit by a car. Go to McDonalds and get a chicken sandwich there he is

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I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road without their motives being questioned.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's better if you don't understand

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How many cows can you fit in a field? It depends on how big your field is.

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what is a mix of a bull dog and a shih tzu. a bread of dog that has a shaggy face and long hair

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A police man, doctor and stage actor walk into a bar. They're identifying the corpse of the stage actor's brother.

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what did the cow say to the chicken Hey im ralston tyler

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did the man dig his nose? because everyone digs their nose

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You're mother is so fat the doctors say she has a serious obesity problem and will most likely have to go on cholesterol pills and begin regulating her diet properly.

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Everybody has a penis! EVERY BODY! WHY can't feminists admit this obvious anatomical fact? Gahhhh!

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When life throws you lemons, Throw grenades.

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So a man and his wife were in a horrible car accident. The man died, so why isn't the wife mourning his death? Because she is also dead. But, do you know who did mourn and cry over this horrible tragedy? Their children, other family members, and friends.

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poop is very very yummy.

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What is wrong with this phrase? The next line is false. The first line is true. Answer: llamas

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What did the white person say to the black person? Nothing because he was black

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Knock knock Who's there? The police, your family is dead.

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* How many roads must a man walk down before you call him a man? * He just need to go to the Register Office and change his name to "a man"

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BIM slowly fucks old women in the dark so they think its rape then he slips his hand up there ass and rips out there heart

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it has a serious crack addiction and there was a drug dealer on the other side.

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Why did the man stop chewing gum? I threw a grenade at him.

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Why can't Jimmy talk? He's dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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