What did one volcano say to the other? Hey.... wana get some lunch... later, not now of course it's WAAAAY TOO EARLY!

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What happened when the kid tried to hang himself? He was overweight, so the ceiling fan that the rope was tied to fell out of the ceiling. When he explained this to his drunk mother when she got home, she reinforced the fact that he was overweight (his low self esteem was the root of his depression) and beat him. The next day, he just chugged antifreeze. This isn't a true story. Just calm down.

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Q. What does physiks sound to most of the people? A. There were two camels, one was green, how much does the sand weight when its dark?

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How do you make a plumber sad? Kill his family...

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How do you know if you are an alien? When you start maulesting sea creatures for their milk

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Hello

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Why did the weird alien jump everywhere? You probably don't want to know. If you learned why it jumped everywhere,you probably would make fun of it. I don't know if you know this, but aliens are sensitive. If you made fun of him, you probably would create World War 3:Humans VS Aliens.

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Why did the little boy cry regularly? Because his father was sexually abusive.

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Holy fuckfarts! I did mention I am at my mothers place right? What am I saying? What am I typing? Marry me now!

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? Misthrown

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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whats something naked and nailed to a cross? jesus, idiot.

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My neighbor's kid was running around yelling magical spells. I said "Wow, you really want to be like Harry Potter, don't you?". He said "Yes!". So, I killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

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Keep Scrolling Penis Keep scrolling Keep scrolling

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What do you get when you put a baby in a blender New Doritos Dip

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PSP... Is a cat... you can throw against the wall.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What was Billy for Halloween? A pirate

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A man walks into a bar. Since he was only moving at a slow walking pace, he was fine, no further events worth noting occured.

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A White and a Chinese got in a fight, who won? None. The fight was unable to begin because a color is not a living organism.

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Q-How do you kill an elephant? A- An elephant gun Q- How do you kill a blue elephant? A- A blue elephant gun Q- How do you kill a red elephant? A- Strangle it until it turns blue then use a blue elephant gune Q- How do you kill a purple elephant?

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead.

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A father teaches his son to ride a bike. Father: Don't stop or you'll fall. Son: Ok, dad. They have a nice time,

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what does the nba stand for? Nothing But Africans

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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