A German, an Irishman, a Mexican and a Texan are flying together on an airplane over the ocean. When the plane begins to experience engine trouble, they find that there is only one parachute for the four of them! Through an amazing display of flying skill, however, the pilot is able to complete the flight and land safely.

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hi im paul ! im an alien :D tyuioyt5rtyuikfuhgdehjdhfghjhgfjjhfjfjdjdjd i pe out of my finger :D

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What did the man say to Hitler? You're a douche

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Why do you give a blond a gun You dont

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What's the difference between a teacher and a train?!? The teacher is a highly-intelligent organism and the train is a large vehicle used in transporting goods over long distances on the ground.

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Whats worse than a son killing his own father? His biological father finds him, 10 years later.

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hey i just met you.... and this might just sound crazy but i have a bad case of short term memory .....were we talking????

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What did Jesus get for Christmas? Birthday presents.

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A girl accidentally clicks on an advertisement while on anti-jokes.com, the girl silently curses and quickly presses the back button.

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guys ive got a TANK under my house a septic tank

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two men are standing on a roof. Man #1: do you want me to push you off a roof? Man #2: No.

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"Lets begin, tell me about yourself," "ok, well first I'm a open book and..." "ok next" "why?" "I fucking hate books!"

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was hit by a fridge. Why did Sally fall off her bike? She was hit by a falling monkey and fridge.

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What did the mute child say to his parents for the first time? "My head hurts" Doctors later found he had hypertensitive heart disease and an aneurysm in his brain. He died later that month.

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Knock knock Who's there? A Jehovahs Witness

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Knock knock, who's there? Your mom! Oh I'm comming.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The mailman The mailman who? How dumb are you?

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Nathan Gooderson.

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What did the Black guy, the Asian, and the White guy have in common? they were all brutally murdered.

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Yo momma's so short, it's probably because she's in a wheelchair.

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Whats the best way to take down a skycraper? -Crash a plane into it-

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why is there a hole in the wall, i hope a prehistoric mole doesnt come out of that hole in the ball CC

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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