Why couldnt rex bark??? because he was a fish!

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Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

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Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

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Did you hear about that man who ate 17 cheeseburgers?! I didn't.

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Why did the girl scream? Someone shot her mom

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What happened when you heard this joke? You didn't laugh.

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Q: Why are pine trees green? A: Time to get a watch

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Why would anyone try to run from a fight if:Its not the size of the dog in the fight, its the size of the fight in the dog? I wasn't even talking about dogs and fight isn't something in you! Next time, don't listen to your football coach.

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It was at the war and there was a camp site where a doctors helped injured soldiers. One soldier comes in the door and holds his arm. The doctor says "You got shot in the arm?" He says yes. Then another soldier walks in the door and holding his shoulder. The doctor says "You got shot in the shoulder?" He says yes. Then another soldier walks in the door and was dragging his left leg across the floor. The doctor says "You got shot in your leg?" The soldier says "No, I stepped on dog shhhttt."

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Q. Knock knock A. Who's there Q. DEEZ A. DEEZ who A. DEEZ NUTZ HA GOT EEEEEM

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Mom: Ask me if you're adopted Boy: Am I adopted? Mom: yes

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What's the difference between black and white people? One is black.

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maddie latino

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Did you know Helen Keller had a playhouse in her backyard? Well if you didn't, it was quite nice. I was her neighbor.

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Knock Knock Who's there (five gunshots)

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cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer

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Jerry Sandusky and two other men are on a cruise ship, when it suddenly starts to sink. The first man says, "save the children!" The second man says, "screw the children!" Jerry Sandusky drowned.

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A man walks into a bar He wakes up from his coma 21 years later and learns that humans now serve pumpkins as gods.

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A man walks into a bar. While he sits on a barstool, a man greets him politely, and they proceed with light conversation.

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Eat My Food!!! Joking I dont have any food

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What do you get when you cross a lion and a tiger? A Ligor.

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diarrhea, diarrhea, duh duh diarrhea, I flush someone down the potty with my diarrhea Duh, duh diarrhea I want to marry my diarrhea duh duh diarrhea. Written by Niggalyncha666

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Why are black people not allowed to play football? They are.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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