Q. What's long and hard and full of seamen? A. A penis. Oops, I misspelled "semen". Sorry. Also, to clarify, this doesn't describe the normal state of the average penis. Usually they are flaccid, and they can only be said to be "full of semen" at the exact moment of ejaculation.

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Carl has 300 candy bars. He eats 295. What does Carl have? Diabetes. Carl has diabetes.

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roses are violets red is blue i like doughnuts doughnuts are good

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what happens when a retard hits an iceberg with a gigantic boat? 1517 people die.

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ur gey

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what do you call a gay guy Ej

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? My cheese

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Why did the little kid fall down? He was pushed

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What did the homeless get for Christmas? Nothing By Nathaniel c

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. At least that's what I've heard, I'm blind.

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Who invented apple? God

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How do you get a Jew in a car? Ask him to get in. How do you get him out? (If they say tell him to get out) Tell him Hitler is driving (If not) Ask him to kindly step out of the vehicle.

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a dyslecstic son seys to his mum can i have a mcdonald for tea the mum seys ye if you can spell mcdonlds and the son seys fuk that im having a kcf

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What happened when the old woman crossed the road? A completely unrelated archery accident lead to the deaths of several people and thousands of dollars of property damage in another part of the country. The woman crossed without injury.

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What's black and Has 8 legs? Gang Rape.

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why did the chicken cross the road? Does it matter why, it just did.

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What happened when Suzy fell off the swing? She hurt herself.

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I used to be able to walk, but then I took an arrow to the knee. It tore my acl and shattered my kneecap.

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Why did the woman get into a car accident? She was blind.

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Dyslexics have more nuf!

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whats worse than 8 babies nailed to a tree? nothing but oca mom is going to be pissed that her kids are nailed to a tree

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What happened when the dinosaur walked out into the rain? He got wet.

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WHY DID THE CHICKEN FART SO LOAD TO GET EVRYYBODY ATENTION

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Why did the woman say ow? She was shot in the foot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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