What's red and green and goes 100 mph? A car that is driving recklessly and happens to have a Christmas paint scheme.

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Who's the fastest kid in AA

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Why is Kony hated by the kid with ADHD? Hey look a kid being raped while watching his family getting killed.

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what is better than your entire family getting brutally murdered applesauce

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Doctor! Doctor! Everyone seems to be stealing things! Piss off, I am a doctor not a detective you prick.

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What did the man say to the ugly woman? Your face makes my penis soft.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it.

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What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for christmas? a pair of shoes and gloves

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What did the T-Rex say to the caveman? Nothing. Tyrannosaurus Rex was a prehistoric land animal that roamed the Earth roughly 65 million years before the appearance of man. Making such a conversation impossible.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? The Pilot.

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How did little Timmy die? He was ripped to shreds by a violent badger.

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There was a buffalo on a farm. The buffalo was slaughtered and then put and a package and sent to people who like the taste of slaughtered, chemical filled buffalo. In other words, people who like buffalo wings.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in a apple? Getting raped by a skorpian

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Whats worse than The Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Women's rights.

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What's the difference between a Chinese guy and a bucket of fried chicken? There are numerous differences.

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A banker makes some poor economic investments with other people's money. turns out the people can never get the money back. the banker walks away like nothing happened. the government does nothing to prosecute the man. Somewhere in there his wife leaves him.

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Oprah is black and the richest women in the world!!!

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Penis

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Question: How did the little girl die Answer: cancer and AIDS

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There are three muffins sitting in an oven. The first one says nothing. The second one also says nothing. They're just muffins and muffins can't talk.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was heading to the funeral house to mourn his dead family.

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How many straight naked men can you fit in a wardrobe? I'm not sure but the situation is highly unlikely!

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what is my catphrase nothing I am too good to have one

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops