why did the dog jump into the pool? because the cat was chasing him

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your mama is so fat that she weighs 261 pounds.

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Why was the girl sad on her Birthday? She found out she was adopted.

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roses are red violets are blue I have a knife stand by the door

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If little Timmy buys 80 candy bars and eats 67, how many candy bars does he have left? Diabetes. Timmy has diabetes. So he was disowned.

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A Jew walks into a furnace.. The bartender says "What'll you have?" The Jew wonders why there is a bartender in this furnace, then they die.

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whats the best anti joke ever? mine you dipshit

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That awkward moment when a sentence doesn't end the way you think it octopus.

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Yo momma is SO black.

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What has 2 brown legs and 2 gray legs? An elephant with diarrhea.

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What's better than a nice hot shower on a cold, rainy day? Osama bin Laden rotting away at the bottom of the ocean.

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People shouldnt make fun of holocaust jokes..my grandpa died cause of it! he fell off the gaurd tower

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. One rainy night an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them out for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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jamie and danel texta like to make love to each other using a gerbal as a toy when they make love they get a african covered in jelly to help them.

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How many people with Alzheimers does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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What happens when you finish a bottle of Sprite? You finish it

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What's grey and can't swim? A Castle

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What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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If you want to paint a wall red, what is the fastest way to paint it with a crying baby? The baby will get very annoying and delay your wall from being painted so you put it in its crib in another room until you are done.

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Girls

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Why Jimmy doesn't listen to his mother? Because he's deaf

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What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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Whys it so cold? Nuclear winter.

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Q: What did Helen Keller say to the bartender? A: "I would like a bud lite please" it was a different Helen Kellar

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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