What do Kenyans do at night? Starve.

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What did the cancer patient get for Christmas? Nothing, she didn't make it that far.

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What's the difference between donuts and dead babies? You can't buy a bakers dozen of dead babies at Tim Hortons.

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Ask me what my favorite color is. What's you favorite color? Blue.

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Why did Marilyn Manson surgically remove 2 ribs from his body? To suck his own penis.

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Have you ever just woken up one day and thought, "I don't wanna wear pants today."

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What's worse than your dad dying in a car crash? Your mom being in the same car.

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a guy walkied into a bar... he really got hurt

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Why couldn't the Canadian taste the maple syrup? Because someone cut off his tongue. -BLLJ

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I do like haikus even when they are random refrigerator

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A: Knock Knock. B:Who's there? A: The IRS and Child Protective Services

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A woman asked me today if I'd ever tried crazy golf. I hadn't actually ever tried it.... So I replied "no".

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Did you know Helen Keller had a swingset? Neither did she.

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What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

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Why was Susan tied up on the railroad tracks? Because she was a blonde and her dad told her it was a roller coaster.

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The sons of modern psychology: COCAINE MOTHERF8CKERS! COMING OUT IN YOUR CINEMA RENTAL STORE YESTERDAY! Sold out. (yesterday)

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A woman was talking to Ghandi. "Oh wait" He says "I can't, My kids are home"

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what did the boy with no arms, no legs, and cancer get for easter AIDS

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This guy was driving in a car with a blonde. He told her to stick her head out the window and see if the blinker worked. She stuck her head out and said, yes.

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what do you call a black man with no arms or legs sitting on a porch? "sir" His life is hard enough with out being subject to social rudeness

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what does rhinoceros and tomato have in common? Neither one can ride a bicycle.

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Why are people racist? Thats a good question

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There are 500 bricks on an airplane. If you drop one out, how many are left? 499. There are three steps to putting an elephant in a refrigerator. What are they? Open the fridge, put the elephant in, close the fridge. There are four steps to putting a deer in the fridge. What are they? Open the fridge, take the elephant out, put the deer in, close the fridge. The Lion King is having a birthday party. All the animals are there but one. Why is that? The deer is in the fridge. A woman wants to cross an alligator infested swamp. How does she do it? She crosses normally because the alligators are at the Lion King's party. She dies anyways. Why? She gets hit in the head with a brick.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops