flavin's head

A man drove up to a drive-thru. He ordered a coke, but the lady at the window spilled it on his lap. He promptly changed his clothes and accepted the lady's apology.

Guy 1: (to guy 2) Close your eyes, stand on one leg, spin around, and yell "I have never eaten a cucumber!". Guy 2: No. Guy 1: Ok.

A man walks into a bar and orders an alcoholic beverage. The bartender serves him and inquires about the man's day. The man says nothing, drinks his beverage, pays his tab and walks out.

How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? 1

A man went to his doctor and said, "Doctor, every time I hit my hand with a hammer, it hurts!" Then both him and his doctor died; so it didn't matter.

How do you get a movie star to go out with you? Blackmail.

Why could'nt Susie talk? The mafia cut out her tounge

What do you call a black man on a swing? Depends on what his name is

What do you call a blonde at the beach? A dipthong.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To rape the hen.

what's worse than the holocaust? nothing.

Why was the boy sad he ate a loaf of bread? Because ducks ate him alive after that.

What's small, black and at the top of a burning building? Oh shit - I forgot my baby

What's brown and sticky??? A brown stick

finding nemo didnt make sense how could a shark go on a no fish diet

What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes back from camp.

A horse walks into a bar. The barman says why the long face. The horse, unable to understand English shits on the floor and leaves

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

A man walked into a bar, therefore beginning a lifetime of alcoholism that would slowly tear his family apart.

What just hit my face? The floor

2 people with ADD are playing baseball. One of them pitches to the other guy and the other guy swings his arms around, misses, then gets hit by a baseball bat. The batter then realized he was the pitcher and the other guy has gone off chasing after a bird that just flew by.

Q: Why is it when geese fly in a V that one side is longer than the other? A: There are more geese on that side.

What's the difference between a Boy Scout and a Jew? One comes back from camp.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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