What did one duck say to the other duck? Nothing, ducks cannot talk.

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Huffing glue only becomes a problem when you get stuck on it

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Your mom is so poor; she doesn't have a job.

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A cup of ranch walks into a lemon

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why did the black man eat the fried chicken? He was hungry

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A man jumped off a cliff and wished he could fly. He was hit by a plane

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What do you call a man will dementia who just killed his cousins, wife, children, and teacher. His name. He's still a man until he's put in a mental institution.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs? A: Disabled.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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Q: What did the Lone Ranger say when he saw his horse coming? A: Here comes my horse.

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When is a car not a car? When it's scrapped and turned into license plates.

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Whats the difference between a fish and whale? Ones bigger than the other.

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why is the sky blue? - because you have herpes.

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How do you get a clown off of your property? You ask him politely to get off and if he doesn't, you should contact the authorities immediately.

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What rhymes with Hitler? Walt Disney.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the black person

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What's worse than a papercut? why do you insist on asking me these questions?

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Q:Whats funny? A:Genocide

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A bear walks into a bar, and says "I'd like a gin... and tonic." The bartender says "AAAAHHH! A BEAR!!!" and calls animal control. Later after the beast has been tranquilized and carted away, he rationalizes having heard the bear speak as trauma-induced hallucination.

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What did the little kid say to the stranger? Nothing. He was taught not to talk to strangers.

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My girlfriend once told me " Life is like a penis, it's hard."

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what do you call a room with no people in it? empty What do you call a room with over 9000 people in it? a fire hazard

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why was the jew shaking hands with a nazi? they realized their differences and were bonding.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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