what happens when a dog and a cat have sex? They create a beautiful baby that ends up dieing from cancer.

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Which is the smallest? A. Jupiter B. Whale C. Cow D. Bracelet Answer: D

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Why did the man fall off the cliff? I pushed him????????

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One day, a guy wanted to know if all blondes really were dumb. He gathered a stadium full of blondes, picked one out of the blondes and said,"I will ask you a few questions. First, what is 23+12?" The blonde replied,"Uh, 30." The other blondes said,"Give her another chance!" "Alright. Next question. What is 30+30?" Said the inquirer. The blonde answered, "Oh! 300!" "Give her another chance!" The blonde crowd shouted. "Alright but this is the last question. What is 1+1?" The blonde answered, "2." The blonde crowd roared, "Give her another chance!"

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What should you do when your refrigerator is running? Tell it to FREEZE!

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How do you make $10,000 in 1 day? I don't know, but I wish I did.

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What did the chicken say when it crossed the road? Nothing. Chickens can't talk.

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Gadaffi

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Why are elephants gray? So you don't get them confused with blueberries.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the axe murderer. Did it work? No.

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Dubstep < Music

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dat shoe shine tho

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Knock Knock Who's there? its the police mam your son has been killed by a hit and run driver, the driver was an alcohol

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I enjoy vagina. While you enjoy penis in your mouth. Just remember God hates fags. :)

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I hated the Reading festival, i'm dyslexic. I hated it because my family died in a housefire while I was there.

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so i turned on my radio.. so i could like listen to some tunes but like, it wasnt working and then like my best bud leaf was all like dude, thats a toaster.

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what is sticky and brown?a stick

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What did the dead Catholic say to Atheist? Nothing. Dead guys can't talk!

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He do you get an emo kid to stop cutting himself? Take away his knife.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was at a crosswalk and had the right of way to on coming traffic

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What did the dying boy get for Christmas? Presents

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The prefix "con" means bad. The prefix "pro" means good. So what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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