Why did the little boy fall over. Because someone shot him in the face.

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

what can't see and has four eyes? a blind kid born with four eyes

There's a 4 door kayak going down the street and it loses a wing. How many doughnuts fit in a dog house? And remember its not yellow, because snakes don't have armpits.

A depressed horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "Millions of years of natural selection." The horse then tries to drink away his sorrows, but the alcohol is only a temporary release from the pain he's feeling. He kills himself the next day.

Whats brown and smells like poo?? Poo

Knock knock Who's there My BUTTCRACK

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Why did the woman drop her baby? she had a stroke.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

What's Great and Danish? The Great Dane Kane.

The stone said to tree I wanna be car the tree replied you cant be a car. Forever a stone

why are black people scared of chain saws? because it goes runnigganigganiggarunnigganigganigga

What is the difference between baseball and the holocaust? One is a fun sporting event…. The other is baseball.

What do you call a boy with no arms or legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

A blonde walks into a bar a uses the restroom. She needed to pee.

I went to the zoo yesterday. There was only one dog, it was a shitzu

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

Question: Whats worse then getting hit by a bus? Answer: Getting hit by a train.

What's worse than hitting your funny bone on a chair............... Hearing one person say "its friday" then realizing that you are now singing

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? I was asking you...

how many jews did hitler kill during the holocaust? too many jews

Man goes to the doctors, says doctor, im depressed. ive tried everything but i just cant see the bright side of life anymore, it seems empty to me, like theres no point in existing. The doctor certifies the man as clinically depressed and alerts the relevant authorities.

Knock knock.Who's there?Dead Baby.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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