What's funnier than 10 dead babies? 11 dead babies.

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If I crash my car, how many trees does it take to cover my yard in orange juice, yellow, because a cat pissed on my foot.

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what did helen keller say when she dropped a box on her toe. nothing. helen keller cannot speak

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What do you call someone with no arms, one leg,and an eye patch? names

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Jack: Hey, you know what sucks? Jill: Vacuums Jack: Hey, you know what sucks in a metaphorical sense? Jill: Black holes Jack: Hey, you know what just isn't cool? Jill: Lava?

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what's red and smells like water? Red food-coloured water.

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What do you do with a wombat? Allow it to freely express instinctive behaviour in its natural habitat.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Im Black Im Black Who Open The Door Now Pancakes Granted

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ewrg

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what did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

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A black man walks into a bar with a lovely parrot on his shoulder. The bartender asks "hey where did you get that Africa says the parrot...

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what smells like a rose bud? a rose, bud.

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What's white and looks like a refrigerator? A baseball

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Two black guys walk into a bank They work there.

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A dyslexic man walked into a bra

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Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary.

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When life gives you lemons you have lemons.

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OMG, I have a really funny alzheimer's joke. Your'e gonna love it! Uhh, I umm kinda forgot what it was now.

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Your momma is so dumb... that when she took an IQ test she score pretty low on it.

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stephen hawking walks into a bar...

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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Why couldnt the man stop the car rolling down the hill? Because he had no legs.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a canoe? One is a type of small aquatic craft, and the other is a human being who practices Judaism.

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Your Momma's so fat when the whales see her they don't say anything as they are unable to speak the human language.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops