Why was the trash man feeling sad about his life? Because he had a mild case of depression to which his doctor recommended taking antidepressant pills.

Your mom is so fat that she is at risk for type two diabetes.

Whats worst then listening to you girl friends problems? Nothing.

Why did old Dorris shit herself? Because Margaret fell over.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says,"Why the long face?" The horse replies,"I have terminal cancer."

what do you call a man without an umbrella? wet

Why did the blind man die? He had eye surgery and the doctor told him when he first opened his eyes there would be a very bright light, turns out he also had alzheimers and wandered onto the train tracks

What walks on four in the morning, three at noon, and two at night? A baby with leprosy.

What does this and this have in common , wait I was meant to put pictures up, aww

a chinese wompus came out of the basement.

Does it not sound kinda fun to keep slapping someone that always turns the other cheek?

A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

What did the irishman say when he walked into a bar? Ouch

Knock knock Get off my porch.

How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

Were do you find a dog with no legs ? Were you left him

Whats worst than getting raped by an old man? -Nothing, getting raped is probably the worst thing to happen to you.

Roses are red Violets are blue your mum is fat and so are you

Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear, fuzzy wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy had no hair because he had cancer and died 3 weeks later.

roses are red violets are blue i uhh umm hold on... the man with Alzheimers proceeds to think of the rest of his poem he wrote for his date, after an hour he remembers but his date has left and the staff proceed to guide him out and back to the insane asylum

Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

What's black and white and red all over? A penguin inside a blender.

Three black men get out of a taxy. They split the bill evenly and get on with their day... By Wade

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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