why did andy wake up this morning. because he wasnt tired anymore

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Wanna Hear A Joke ? Afgan

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Why did the vegetarian eat a steak? Because he was not a vegetarian

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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I got a fever, and the only prescription is more ibuprofen.

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What is the proper response when someone says "My family died in a car crash"? Lol fail

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Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who pooped in my garden?

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Abe Lincholn had a son :) But he died |:

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Roses are red Violets are blue Refrigerators come in an assortment of colors

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Two homosexuals are making love in the kitchen. One leaves for a bit and says, "Dont finish without me." Upon returning, white goo is spattered across the floor. Concerned that the clumsily dropped icing may stain, they promptly clean it.

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This stuff on espn about Jason Collins is very gay

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you walk into a bar Griffin: 'are you ok'

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What do you call cheese that isnt yours? Stolen cheese.

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What do you call a black man backfilping off a roof The dark knight

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What did the man say when he realized that he was late for work? "Shit, I'm late for work."

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A duck walks into a bar and is quickly shooed away because it is unsanitary to have a duck in a bar.

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What did the guy say to the girl when he was holding a tool? You're a tool????

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why was six afraid of seven? prison changes a person

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whats sad about 4 black people in a cadalic fallign over a cliff? it wasnt there car

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So, this guy walks into the doctor's and says: "Doctor, it hurts when I poke my leg like this." The doctor says: "Yes, you've shattered both your kneecaps. You'll never walk again."

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Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

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A sad-looking man entered a bar. The barman asked, "why so sad?" The man replied, "I have a terminal illness."

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My mother-in-law fell down a stairway. I turned to my wife and said “Call an ambulance!!”

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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