Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: Why did you just verbalize the onomatopoeic sound of knocking on my door rather than taking the action itself?

Once upon a time there was a man that was exercising and he pulled a muscle and had to have his arm removed. The end.

Why did the stranger sexually assault the woman? --Because he was a sexual predator..

Nuneaton..

A black man walks into a store and buys something.

Q: What did the German say to the Jew? A: Guten Tag.

Why were the 3 men wearing black suits? They just left their mothers funeral, she died of terminal cancer.

roses are red, violets are blue, i dont like to rhyme, but i do like to poo.

I'm so hungry I feel I would be able to ingest large quantities of food.

why was the pen mad at the pencil? it wasnt. objects don't have feelings

Knock, Knock Who's there? Betty. Answer the door!

Knock, Knock. Who's there? The wind. The wind who? ...

Why is the sky blue? The sun reflects off the water molecules in all bodies of water

Last guy is a Joke thief Love, T.R.

You are joking right?

What did the waffle say when the black guy started eating him? Nothing, because waffles are inanimate objects and therefore cannot talk.

A plane crashes near an uncharted island with a low supply of fresh water and hardly any animals, except for a few deadly ones. How do the survivors live until rescuers show up? -There were no survivors from the plane crash

Why is Coldplay really big in Japan? They're tall guys.

what happened to the man who got hit by a truck driven by Obama? he died.

CAN YOU FIND YOUR D I C K YET BOMBER

why couldnt hellen keller drive? she was a woman.

Doctor, I am afraid of getting sexually abused. Hmm, sounds serious, take off all your clothes so we can get a proper look.

What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

whats worse than dropping your ice cream down the stairs? dropping your baby down the stairs

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...