What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Your face Godammit!!!

Hey babe, did it hurt when the doctor cut off your umbilical cord when your mother gave birth to you. Because I have a bellybutton too!

the WNBA

Yo momma's such a whore that she violates the sanctity of marriage by sleeping with men other than her husband.

-Can I ask you one question? -Yes. -Thank you.

I have a joke Who is better, Kobe or Lebron? Kobe. But I lied, that wasn't a joke.

Why am i so sexy? Because a dog raised me.

Roses are red violets are blue faces like yours belong in a zoo don't be mad I'll be there too not in a cage but laughing at you

What is useless and over-payed? Our government.

What's brown,green got four legs and can fall out of a tree and kill you? A snooker table.

I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road without their motives being questioned.

What do you call a larger individual having intense sex with a smaller individual? Rape.

Why didn't the blonde eat bacon? She was Jewish, and it was against her religion.

whats worse than unloading a truck of dead babies with pitch forks? Finding one alive

You have such a big heart (Girlfriend) The doctor's think dangerously so (Guy)

Why would Maria not have sex with Liam? Because she is Danish and doesn't shave and therefore is self-conscious

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He didn't want to.

It sucks if you have amnesia. It sucks if you have amnesia.

How many times has Susie fallen off the swing? Not enough.

What's the difference between a cat and a dog? Vast. While they are both mammals belonging to the order Carnivora, and therefore have a loose evolutionary connection, dogs belong to the Carnidae family and cats belong to the Felidae family. There would need to be much biological research done to discover all of the differences that result from this.

Oh because you have Lou Gehrigs Disease

Why has the suicide in dentists decreased? -Due to the fact that being a dentist makes suicide redundant!

Why did the chicken cross the road? To mutilate the body of a Jewish girl that lay on the other side.

2 sausages were in a frying pan. 1 sausage says it sure is hot in here, the other sausage says WTF a talking sausage!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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