Your mom is SO ugly, I entered her in an ugly contest, and she came in fourth place!

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He didn't he was chicken

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what is long,hard and holds semen,a submarine , i spelled seamen wrong

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Wanna hear a joke? Sure. Me too.

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?" The man responds "I'd like to hear the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance cocvered everything." The man hangs his head and tears up as he asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor heads for the door as he answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being deined coverage. None of your future treatments or appointments will be covered." The man snaps his fingers and says "Damn! I should've voted Democrat!"

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Why did the chiocken cross the road? There's no such thing as a chiocken.

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Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

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whats white, and stinks of urine? nick griffin's toliet

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How does a doctor wake up in the morning He opens his eyes

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Q. what tall and looks like a jew? A.TODD

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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What do a squirrel and a cucumber have in common? They both cant ride bikes

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What's worse than 20 babies stapled to one tree? One baby stapled to 20 trees.

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Whats pink and screaming? a skinned baby in a bucket of vinegar+

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

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I'm rubber and you're glue, neither one of us say anything because inanimate objects can't talk.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? The Batmobile only seats one, you'll have to take the bike Boy Wonder.

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What did the twin towers order from the pizzeria? Two large Plane

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What do you call a man who has lost both his legs, one arm, and half his eye? Larry

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why didnt Tim Tebow go to church? He had practice half an hour before the service was scheduled to start, and to do both was impossible and missing practice would have resulted in disciplinary action from both his coaches and his teammates.

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A Mexican and a Black man are in a car. Who's driving? The police officer.

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What Do you say to an atheist after he sneezes? Bless you. Its just polite

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A man dressed in a business suit goes into a doctor's office. He asks the receptionist how much a vasectomy would cost. After a minute of her looking it up on the computer she turns to him and says "The procedure will cost $750." He then thanks her and leaves.

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Why did the Black Man sit at the back of the bus? Because all the other seats were taken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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