Roses are stools, Violets are bums, sugar is knit, thank you, LSD.

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Q; what did the gangster say after he and his gang robbed a bank? A;Hey boys lets go drink some soy milk (After that his gang killed him) but the moral of the story is to not rob banks or take drugs

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Roses are red, violets are blue. Grass is green.

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Knock,Knock Who's there? Afro Circus Ya get the fuk off my property!

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What do you call five white guys sitting on a bench? THe NBA

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Nobody, you got ding-dong-ditched

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Me Me, who? -You -You? but I thought you were me. - I am you, you're looking in the mirror, asshole. - No, sir i'm sorry you have the wrong house. Asshole doesn't live here.

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Q; What's the new slogan for the TSA? We handle more junk than EBay.

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What looks like a dick? A penis

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Gifted Education classes learning social studies curriculum.

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What did the pedophile say to the little girl? "I have a condition and I think it would be healthy for both of us if you stayed within the supervision of your parents"

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Generator? One powers your house...and then there's the generator.

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A train conducter conducts goes at 60mph, when he goes under a bridge he goes at 52mph. When he goes over a hill he goes at 47mph. If he goes under 3 bridges and over 6 hills what did the conductors mother eat for dinner that night. Nothing, after many months of suffering she died from Huntington's disease.

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Where is the best place to hold a bridal shower? The Kitchen

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs being pulled behind a boat? A: Skip.

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What would be a good feature for this site? A search by keyword feature. (sorry...)

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whats worss than getting a papercut gohnnarea

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What is the priest favorite book? The Bible

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Have you heats about the Guy who's parents died in à car crash... No He killen himself because of hus parents Deathstars

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Roses are red Violets are blue My friend has diabetes Stop posting diabetic jokes

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So a mama tomato, a daddy tomato, and a baby tomato were all walking down the street. The baby tomato was falling behind its parents. So the daddy tomato goes back, squishes the baby tomato and yells ketchup!

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Pull over dat ass to fat, no seriously your blocking a firelane

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A Jewish, Italian, and Russian man are stranded on an island. Eventually the Russian man dies from heatstroke, leaving the other two to decide whether or not to feast on his remains. The Italian eventually goes mad and tries to murder the Jewish man who is forced to defend himself and kill his remaining friend. Shortly after, the Jewish man is eventually rescued by a passing German vessel after suffering severe dehydration and malnourishment and hanging on only by his faith in God. As they are leading him to safety, the Jewish man eventually summons the strength to tell his saviors about the horrible things he has done and all he has gone through, not knowing if he'll ever be able to forgive himself. His German rescuers take one awkward look at him, and don't know what to say to help him, leading afterwards to several years of PTSD therapy and rehabilitation.

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Once upon a time a guy took his pants off why because he was touching himself

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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