Every time im sad, I think of a T-Rex trying to put on a hat.

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How does a cancer patient bathe? He can't because he lives in an arid climate where water is scarce.

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What stinks and comes out of someones mouth. Bad Breath

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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What did the tree say to the other tree?....nothing cause trees can't talk!

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I'm on the ABC diet. The ABC stands for: Americans British Chinese I eat humans.

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How do you find dennis ferguson? Look at danyons bckground

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was depressed for a long time and decided to end his life by getting hit by a car.

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How can you tell if a blonde has been using your computer? Ask her.

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Why did the man cross the road? His mother had recently passed away after a 12 year battle with lung cancer and is visiting her tombstone.

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Roses are red violets are red bushes are red oh shit my garden is on fire

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Why did the girl lose her appetite She was stabbed repeatedly with a switch blade.

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What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Raped

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i jack off in the school bathroom #yolo -toby limbers

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Whats invisable and smells like a apple? An invisable apple

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Did you hear about the blind carpenter who picked up his hammer and saw? Did you hear about the deaf shepherd who gathered his flock and heard (herd)? If you don't understand these, use your dictionary and look up the words "blind," "deaf," "saw," "heard" and "herd." http://gpsphone-tracker.com/

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Asexuals aren't known for f***ing around.

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Why did the kid hide under the table? There was an earthquake.

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Whats less comfortable than a metal bench? The trunk of a car when you're being abducted.

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How so you find out if a black woman is pregnant? Have her take a pregnancy test

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Wanna hear a joke..... Corey Jacobs Scrotum!

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Why did the man run? Because he was trying to get a gold medal for the 200m at the Olympics.

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Why is Satan evil? Because he makes people eat apples.

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"I see" said the blind man to his dead wife

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops