Whats worse then getting caught watching porn? 9/11

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what is yellow with red all over tweety in a blender

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What begins with "f" and ends with "uck"? A curse word.

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Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

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What do you call a black priest? a priest, you racist

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What did the german speech therapist say to his mute patient? There a few methods we can use to help you obtain the power of speech.

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Where do you find a dog with no legs ? Same place you left it ...

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You you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you. Way do go lazy you didn't read all the you's so you didn't realize there was a yoo in there. But now you realize there aren't any yoo's there way to go.

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

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Knock Knock I have a f*cking doorbell you asshole

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Why did the boy drop the ice cream? Because he had a seizure.

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Don't tell anyone, the Health Department is already on our backs.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a murderer.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Boy: Mother, I'm dying! Mother: Ha, lol, I put poison in your cheese! Boy: MOTHER! Boy: *dies*. Mother: Ha, lol!

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What's black and crunchy? CO-Co PUFFS

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What did the red-haired barber say to the father who abandoned him at birth? Nothing. The father sat to the side and read a magazine as the barber cut the hair of his legitimate child, failing to recognize the irony of the situation.

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What did Voldermort say to harry potter? i raped you mum last night!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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Knock knock. "Who's there?" I am deaf. "I am deaf who?" What?

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How do you make an eggroll? You push it.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why can't George Washington sit up straight? He's dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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