A) Knock Knock. B) Who's There? A) Me. B) Oh, well I'm in the shower, just give me five minutes. A) OK, I'll wait in the kitchen, is it cool if I heat up a hot pocket? B) Yeah sure, just not the pepperoni one, I only have one left and I was saving it for lunch. A) Alright.

Why did the black man buy watermellon? Because he was having a barbecue in his suburban neighborhood and he wanted some fruit.

What do you call a black man on the moon An astronaut

Q: Why is asprin white? A: It works.

I wouldn't consider the Titanic sinking to be a disaster, ????It is better down where it is wetter under the sea! ????.

An old lady says, "Oh i see now." The guy standing next to her says, " Honey oyu know im blind right?"

What do Tiger Woods and Charlie Sheen have in common? They are both celebrities.

yo mama is fat shes fat

How do you drown a blonde? Tie a cinderblock to her foot and throw her in water.

Q: Why did the fork cross the balloon? A: Apples

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have feeble minds and tend to wander around.

Why didn't the business man ever wear pants? He didn't have any legs.

Why did the Mexican cross the river? For an opportunity at a better life for himself and his loved ones.

KNOCK KNOCK who's there? OUCH! what's your door knob made of? nails?

Knock knock. Who's there? Come in.

A middle aged man goes to a psychic. She tells him that he has prostate cancer, and his wife has been cheating on him for the past 3 years.

To mamas so fat shes fat

How many Weasleys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2

Why doesn't Micheal Jackson do a music video with Usher? Because he is dead.

A little boy starts to be followed by a man in a large white van. They come across an intersection, the boy turns left, and the man turns right.

What did the white teen say to the black man? Sup nigga. What then followed? A savage beating at which the teen did not survive.

Why did little jimmy fall of the playground? He was blind and wasn't aware of his surroundings

Who has two thumbs and gets to go home tomorrow? Well, not your son. He's in a persistent vegetative state and we had to amputate both of his arms.

Why was the 6 year old girl crying? Her step-dad kicked her in the face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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