Yo mamma's so old she is dead.

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i have a pet duck, when i take it a bath i use cold water, if i use hot water it and i drop a carrot in the tub it will think im cooking it.

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Why did the rabbit like to wear shoes? It doesn't.

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What did the doctor say to the recently diagnosed AIDS patient? I'm sorry there is nothing we can do.

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why are black people good at basketball? because they practice

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A strange man knocks at the door He's your son

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Why is it a shame if a kid gets run over by a car? I like the newspaper headlines about stabbings better.

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That was totally mean! I mean I was in no way going to say any of that to you! Especially not the last part, sorry that must have been part of the suggestion or something, I barely ever tell myself stuff like that, I mean stop it okay? I mean I totally read it and all but I was all like "I am notnot typing that" please stop it, its humiliating.

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I asked a Jewish girl for her number. she rolled up her sleeve.

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What's the difference between a giraffe and an erection? An erection is much easier to obtain.

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why did the little boy start to cry? because his parents didn't love him

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what goes ha ha ha ..plop? We are all going to die.

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? They may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

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what do you call a mentally and physically obese man? nothing until you know or obtain his name

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Who is the Greek god of STDS? Herpies

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Woman: If you were my husband, I've give you poisoned wine. Winston Churchill: Madame, if you were my wife, I would hope we could have enough love to attempt marriage counseling so as to work out these issues.

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Q: What is green, has red shoes, exists in videogames and runs really really fast while collecting rings, running trough loops, has a fox sidekick etc? A: Sonic The Hedgefrog. Moral: I was always a bigger fan of Super Fratelli Brothers though...

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Knock knock Who the fuck says knock knock?

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knock knock whos there micheal jackson too soon

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Two muffins are in the oven, one looks at the other and says, "it sure is hot in here." The other responds, "AAhHH a TALKING MUFFIN."

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Bird is the Word. Actually 'What" is the word.

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/\ The joke above was really dumb. \/ The joke below is pretty good.

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Q: Whats the best part of a bald pussy? A: After you put the diaper back on you perv!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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