One man's trash is another man's treasure is a horrible way to tell a kid that he's adopted

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Their, they're, there You're, your

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I could even argue that having blood on your penis is kinda fun sometimes.

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How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? You can't

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Why did the dog have 2 legs? he got cut in half.

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What color is the orange? Grey, I'm color blind.

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Sorry Liz, his sodium levels are so bad that while he is drinking a lot, his body is not containing water, and while his pulse and breath is fine he is passing out from time to time, he is asking for stimulants Ritalin specifically, but I am not sure if his body could withstand that, I really don't mind to pry, but does he use Ritalin? I mean he chats a lot, but ADHD? I am just asking out of health concerns, not that I am a doctor, but I just worry... Flirty personality... More like a clown, he says he refuses to eat unless I breastfeed him XD. He is eating now though, solids work, never had a tougher patient, he will make it for sure.

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I'd like to advertise the love of Jesus in Kobane. Do u join me next Monday? :D

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knock knock? whose there? i dont know. i dont know who? i dont know.

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wow, that guy is such a buzz-kill. worse than Buzz Killington!

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What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer

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A man and his horse walk into a bar, he is told to leave because animals are not allowed on the property

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A pig, a chicken, and a cow are born on 3 separate barns. They are raised by old men who subside off the grains of the field. When the animals mature, the farmers will butcher the pig, slaughter the chicken, and gut the cow. The farmer who raised the chicken may enjoy a few eggs first but the animals will all die eventually. Either of natural causes or more likely being butchered for profit. Cows make milk.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender.

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Why was the black man scared to leave his house? Because he saw a load of mutated zombies outside his door trying to kill him. However, he realised that this was not possible and was not scared anymore. He went outside but got hit by a fridge and died...

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A man with no face walks into a bar, another man sees this and promptly asks "Sir, why do you have no face?" The first man says nothing and walks away.

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What the diffrence between a jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when it goes in the oven

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Q: Why wouldn't the other kids play with Timmy at recess? A: Because he was a burn victim and had no face.

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What was the joke about that woman with altsimers again? Ironically I forgot.

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Why would Jesse Ziegenbein and Terran Hansen make a good couple? Because they both smell like shit and are fat as hell

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Did you hear about the big Polish tragedy? There was a power outage in Poland's busiest shopping mall, People were stuck on the escalators for 4 hours. A woman gave birth in the elevator and died.

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whats white and sticking?... glue, you dirty bastard

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What's worse than being named SAID? Having AIDS.. And getting a bee sting - it hurts like ****!

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So this squirrel is walking across the road when a HUGE truck comes and smashes him beneath the tire.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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