Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll tootsie pop?

hey! Wanna hear a bird joke? No. Well this is Hawkward....

whats worse than sitting next to jack grindey nothing

Hellen keller

What do you call an iphone in a puddle? Broken

Why did Dom move to Wales? Because he is poor!

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she didn't have arms. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

if two couples walk down the street, when do they die? when a pack of rabid dogs eats them.

A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

yo mamas so fat... she's a map on call of duty

How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light-bulb? Probably one. Replacing a light-bulb is a pretty simple task which any person (regardless of ethnicity) should be able to do without assistance.

Whats the difference between a pizza and a black man. A pizza can feed a family of five.

"Seriosly" You got a life buddy? Are you okay? Cant you see that I am totally rocking out on my imaginary air guitar which is now inside your mind? No you are not okay! Moral: YOU ARE NOT OKAY SPREAD THE WORD! INFORM THE WORLD! YOU ARE NOT OKAY! Moral2nd: "Seriously" though dawg, you cant keep watching over me all the time, I mean you I smell the hypocrisy, but are you guys AAAALWAYS HERE? DO NOT REPLY! WE REPEAT, DO NOT REPLY!rq

What's the only part of a vegetable that you can't eat??? His wheelchair

What happened to the woman driver who drove to Tesco? Due to the pleasant traffic conditions, she arrived slightly earlier than expected and she finished her weekly shop in forty minutes. She returned home, once again in good traffic and ate a delicious lunch of sausages and chips.

What do you call a black man driving a car? A driver.

What do you do at a club? You club.

What is one similarity between John Samos, and the dreadful clown? they have a red nose and are payed to be funny, aside from John Samos!

Why did the homeless man not get any ice cream from the store? Because he was not very bright and didn't try in school. Therefore he couldn't find a job or get his job back at the janitor at Go-Mart. This proves that not doing your school work correct can really effect your future. Plus they was sold out of chocolate.

A man runs over a woman with his car, whose fault was it? The woman's for trying to cross the street in the dark without a crosswalk.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt, it was hit by a car

Knock knock. Who's there? Auntie.

Your mom is over the average weight for a person of here height and age.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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