"Ask me a question." "No" "Cheese" ... "What?"

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Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama all found a magical lamp. The Genie appeared and said, "I will grant one wish for all of you, and one wish only." Bill wished to become president. The other two thought that would be pretty cool and did the same. (ic3)

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Hello

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How do you catch a Jew? Just give him a little shower ;)

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A man falls out of a boat. What happens next? Well, you would think he'd know how to swim, but due to his alzheimer's he didn't, so he drowned.

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There are two hippopotamus' in a pond cooling off from the hot day. One is named Nathaniel IV and the other Timothy. Timothy asks Nathaniel, "Nathaniel, what day is it today?" Nathaniel then replies," I believe it is Tuesday." Timothy is taken back then replies," How odd. I could've sworn it was Wednesday."

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why is yo mamma fat? cause she likes doughnuts

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Why did the man rob a bank? Because he was poor.

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What is black and white and red all over? Zebra domestic violence isn't funny.

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What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? dinner

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How did the little boy fall off his bycicle? Prior to this incident, a psychopathetic killer murdered his family. Therefore, to escape the killer, the boy got onto his bycicle in hopes of manuvering away from the threat. Since it was nighttime he did not notice the fault in the asphalt.( No ryhme intendid.) From flipping over his handlebars, he fell unconcious. Upon the killer spotting the boy, he sliced his head off and left the scene to not be spotted by police.

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A rat scurries into a bar. Six days later, all of the people in that bar die of bubonic plague.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Lard and Liz lard,lard and Liz

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to, like any other chicken

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George Washington delivered a short speech to his troops before they crossed the delaware river. Here it is: "Get in the boat."

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Dementia.

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Chuck Norris' farts are silent and deadly. Deadly because he's Chuck Norris, silent because his butthole is extremely loose

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What do you call a black guy with Alzheimer's? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE

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what's the difference between a bearded man and bearded lady the bearded man has a PENIS

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What did the group of black men do to the old white woman? Gave her back the purse she dropped.

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saw a free cat yesterday...it was dead on the side of the road

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Why did the witch ride her broom? Because the vaccum was to heavy...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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