what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor

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Whats white and can talk? Snow, i lied about the colour

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Q: Why can you not thumb up your own comment? A: "You've already voted" douche...

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Q: IMAGINE that your in a heart racing battle with a huge grizzly bear when suddenly a bird picks you up and carries you to china and leaves you on the adge of a cliff which then you are chased by warriors and are forced to jump off the edge. What do you do? A: Wake up

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Who did the Vampire bite? No one because vampires aren't real.

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why was 6 afraid of 7?

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What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A tragedy almost unparalleled in marine history.

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Kirstie Alley is soooo fat! How fat is she? Well, she's so fat that she's in grave danger of developing heart disease, and death

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A blonde walks into a bar therefore her face hurts

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how do you get a black guy out of a tree? fried chicken.

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What happens when you pour Red Bull on a butterfly without wings? It drowns......

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What's red and green and goes 100mph? A frog in a vehicle on the Autobahn.

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when life gives you lemons, force a hobo to eat them because lemonade is going to suck if life doesnt give you any sugar.

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What's the difference between Futurama and One Direction? Futurama only has one bender.

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how do u fit 20 jews in a car? 2 in the front and 20 in the ashtray

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your other apple.

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An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

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How many electricians does it take to screw on a light bulb? 1

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What's black and blue and is scared to death? the kid in my trunk

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a slice of tomato A really bad joke

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What does a black guy do to a white girl when the lights go off and there's a bed in the room? They go to sleep so they can have enough energy to work their two jobs and provide for their family after they've been evicted from their home.

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How come Helen Keller couldn't drive? Because cars were not invented back then.

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i actually read the terms of service before i posted this

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops