Whats brown and smells like shit? Shit.

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What do you call a dog that's having a stroke? An emergency animal hospital.

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what happened to the mexican who dropped his ice cream at work? He got a raise, won the $5 billion jackpot, was given ten car dealerships, then died.

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I have read and agree to the terms of service.

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Moral below, I understand you are one of us, but you are not supposed to act when I, your leader is spreading the message, if you want to risk harming the fundation behind your status as a shadow and its benefits, I suggest you cease signing your comments with moral. Moral the friendly neighbourhood r*pist: "Ruining the fundation behind the life of your choosing, will always end up ruining your chance to live and act freely, if you are a true shadow, then you will follow and obey"

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A dog walks into a saloon and says "I'm lookin' for the man who shot my paw." The patrons are afraid of the talking dog.

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What do the Irish do on their birthdays? Eat birthday cake and sing happy birthday

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Why doesn't the Athiest wear socks? He has a minor fungal condition on his feet.

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What did the 3 bears say when they saw goldielocks sleeping in their bed? Nothing. Bears can't talk so they ate her.

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What do a gas and a liquid have in common? Nothing

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Haiku's Are Easy. But Don't Always Make Much Sense. Refrigerator.

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What did timmy fall off the swings? He had no arms

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What did the black man in a white van get when he went over the speed limit? A speeding ticket

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I am back with more jokes! -Lets go Mets It is best to dislike this one

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Vagina-Boob

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What was the biggest party of 2010? The Democrats.

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Why did the women leave the kitchen? Because she had been forcibly removed from her place of food preparation by a large angry mob of her neighbours who thought she was a wtitch and were now going to burn at the stake. It is Salem, november 1643.

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I had a dream I watched Inception.

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What does a paralysed mans legs feel like? We don't know, he is paralysed

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What do you call a cow that's not cooked? A cow

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Somebody call animal control, there's a horse in the bar." The horse is then taken away and made into glue and dog food.

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A man walks into a bar. After several hours of drinking and loud unintellegable outbursts to those around him, the man wonders off to a nearby bus stop and relieves himself. He is now a registered sex offender.

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Whats the difference between a circle and a peace sign? Three lines!

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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