A man walks into a bar. He then walks out of the bar a while after. He then goes home and goes to bed. And then he goes to sleep. And then in an odd time travel paradox,a T-Rex arrives from the past and kills him and his entire family.

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What did the one horse say to the other. Nothing because horses can't talk.

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finding out that when you had sex with that prostitute, you severely injured your urethra tube and you cannot create urine or spurm.

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What did Abraham lincoln do after getting assassinated? Certainly not riding a bike thats for sure.

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How did Clumsy Clearance eat shit? He was in the Human Centipede.

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QUIT PUSHING DAD GUMMIT!!!

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kids make accidents in the backseat of your car but u and your wife made an accident in the backseat and thats how you got that rottten troll that makes accidents in the car!!

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Q:What do you find in the middle of a pile of dead babies? A:Another dead baby!

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Dear Chase. You are retarded Your jokes suck Violets are red jump off a bridge

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Q: where was Johnny during the bombing? A: everywhere

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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what's brown and sticky? a turd.

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why did the asian go to the bar? they were told they could drive better when drunk how much worse could they get

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A seal walks into a club and gets hammered.

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TOYS TOYS TOYS IN THE ATTIC

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Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

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Yo mama so fat when she went to the ocean the whales started to sing we are family even though your fatter than me

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Why did the other Albino cross the road? He was running away from a witch doctor who was going to brutally murder him and steal his body parts.

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WHAT DOES A NUMBER DO WHEN IT'S HORNE? MATHDERBATION

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how did the doctors try to cure stephen hawking? turn him off then back on again

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Q: why did the dad drop his baby? A: she was slippery.

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Whats worse to see 100 dead babies on the bed of a truck or 100 fake babies falling directly from the empire state building... I don't know I have never seen either but if you could tell me if you saw it maybe i can use my imaination!!!

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How do u get a clown off of a swing? You hit him with an axe.

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Remember that part where Jesus gets angry at a fig three and kills it because it "was lazy" for refusing to grow figs at winter? Brother Jeez, that was kinda mean man! You know it was winter rite? Anti Joke or not, that part is funny, so if Jesus returns and wants you to make him a sammich you better go get that goddamn sammich!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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