A bartender walks up to a church and a synagogue

so david walks into a convenience store and wanted to buy a pack of gum. so he asks the cashier how much is the gum and the cashier said that it is 99 cents and then david said oh no! i thought it was 98 cents.

What do your friends have in common with a tree? They both fall down when you hit them multiple time with an axe

Do not lose hope, you have always considered me hard to get, while this time, I came to you. Next time too, I kinda owe you.

2 women were sitting quietly

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? 15 minutes in the oven.

Your moms so old. She might die soon

How many raisins can you fit in a box? It depends on the size of the raisins and the box.

what does a gorilla do when it sleeps. it snores.

One time at band camp, I advanced my clarinet skill, which led me to have a good life.

I love this website, oh shit *Car* Dead*

What did the man say to his friend? Hello.

a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

what did the therapist say to the other therapist? WE'VE SAID THIS WAY TOO MANY TIMES YOU SHIT

Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes You should probably get yourself checked.

How do you make people run? When someone is behind you, hold the door open and wait.

There once was a man from Peru, Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright in the middle of the night, To find nothing amiss.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a registered six affender.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm dyslexic couldn't tell, could you?

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was holding on to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Pier pressure.

A girl asks a guy "How come you don't take me dancing anymore?" The guy said "Because we were both killed in a car accident."

How do you kill a blonde girl? You put a scratch and sniff sticker on the bottom of a filled pool.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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