Why did the chicken cross the road? -I don't care

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How do you make a little girl cry?

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Why did the man die? He helped others before placing his own oxygen mask on?

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What's worse than losing a contact Having a bloody stool

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If you place a dog next to a cow, they're not the same size

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Two construction workers are working on the final floor of what will soon be the worlds tallest building. The first turns to the other and says: "Hey tom can you throw me a three quarters hex wrench? i think my set is metric." the second guy turns around and says: "yea, here you go."

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A catholic priest gets a nun pregnant. He drowns the baby several months later.

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How do you know if there is an elephant in your fridge? Well, because there's an elephant in your fridge.

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Girls get fucked Boys fuck Gays puke

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Once there was a pig named Poga. When he grew up, he was slaughtered and made into bacon.

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Why was the man sad? Cause his dog fell off a cliff

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus.

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A guy walks into a pub. He cant walk out because hes blind.

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Three black men was in a car. They were going on holiday.

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what's worse than both your parents dying? finding out that they were hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt and they left you nothing, including the house, oh and you have to be out by the end of the week, the bank is ready to re-possess the house, especially since your parents haven't paid the mortgage for 8 months. oh, by the way, happy birthday! written by KA

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what did one dog say to another dog? ....nothing, because they can only bark.

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What do Ed Milliband and David Milliband have in common? They are brothers.

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Jesus walks into a church only to be touched inappropriately.

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Why wouldn't Jimmy ever eat his vegetables at dinner? As a young boy, Jimmy watched as a robber entered his house, suffocated his mother by clogging her airway with a cucumber, and escaped with their life savings.

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What did the autistic child say to the doctor? Nothing. His condition is so severe that he is mute and may never talk for the rest of his life.

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Why didn't the young child commiserate the death of his grandparents after they were simultaneously crippled by a tremendous avalanche whilst skiing? He didn't exist.

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What's worse than a bee sting? The holocaust What's worse then the holocaust? Two bee stings

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Whats worse than eating a worm? Haveing a worm die in your penis.

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What happened when the man crossed the road? He lived happily ever after because he looked both ways for traffic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops